by Tina
Ella's soft breathing soon became steady. Her eyelids had long rested shut for the night, but Ross couldn't stop reading the story with the same heart felt tone. It wasn't untill the last few verses that he allowed himself to stop.
"I'll love you forever. I'll like you for always. As long as I'm living, my baby you'll be."
He shut the book and stared at his child. So beautiful.
He brushed a hand softly through her dark hair and leaned closer. Planted a tender kiss on her forehead and sighed. Laid down next to his little angel and wrapped one arm carefully around her.
That friday night came too soon. But when Ross thought about everything that had happened on the last few days, it seemed like a century since they had arrived. But clearily, a centure just wasn't enough.
This was it, he had to confront Rachel now. Or... did he? They still had saturday...
He kissed Ella's forehead one more time and prayed she'd still be there for many nights to come.
"What took you so long?" Rachel was already waiting, spread in his bed with the t.v. on. She greeted him, with a broad smile. "Did the kids give you a hard time?"
Ross smiled weakly and sat down on the edge, looking at the t.v..
"No, no... I just couldn't get myself out of there, you know?"
The emotional weight of his words seemed to have been loaded on Rachel's conscience. She crawled across the bed and hugged him from behind.
"I know, they're wonderful kids..."
She kissed his neck and rested her chin on his shoulder, wrapping her arms around him. He caressed them gently while his gaze fell on the t.v.. His mind, however, was focused anywhere but there.
"Rach?"
"Yeah?"
He kissed her left forearm.
"Can I ask you something?"
She froze. There was so much to ask...!
"Okay"
He could sense the fear in her voice and looked down. Gently, he made her let go of him and turned around to face her.
"How come you don't see the guys anymore?"
Rachel quickly looked down and kept her sight low. How could she explain something she didn't quite understand herself?
"I..." as she began, her voice was too weak. "I don't know"
He looked down aswell.
"I just... I knew I let them down"
Ross quickly looked up at her, confused. Rachel was too uncomfortable. She couldn't figure out a way of saying exactly what she had just thought of because it would bring up matters she didn't want to discuss with him just yet. Not when it could be the last time they shared such intimate moments.
"I..." she finally looked back into his eyes and trailed off.
He deserved answers. But they needed a proper goodbye.
She held his hand.
"Can we talk about this tomorrow?" Ross looked down, but she quickly picked up his chin and kissed his cheek provocatively, keeping her face close to his. "I can think of other things we can do while the kids are sleeping" she whispered into his ear and nibbled his ear lobe.
'Not fair!' Ross thought to himself.
She knew too well how to seduce him yet one more time. And so she did, prepared to think of it as the last time they'd ever be together.
Ross once more let himself be carried by the moment. Once, twice, the millionth time,... What difference woud it make now?
Even though they'd done this many times, it always seemed different. But it was the familiar feeling Rachel wanted to capture and keep safe in her memory. The way their skin felt on each other's, his lips, his tongue.
His soft voice in her ears.
"Remember the cranapple juice?"
The way she giggled at the memory of their first time. How easy it was to giggle in his arms, how many great times they'd shared. The way she could hear her own voice quickly turning from girlish giggles to sensual moans.
It was so natural the way she let herself go with him. No games, no trying too hard. He had a talent to make her feel that way, to make her smile genuinelly and make her laugh as if everything was okay, even through the hardest of the days.
The way just about... everything... happened.
Sunny saturday morning, sure enough the beaches were full. Walking along the coast, Ross and Rachel had one eye trying to spot a nice place to settle and another watching the kids, a few steps ahead. Ella tugged hard to Mike's little hand and he didn't seem to mind. The little girl, however, was having trouble keeping up with her brother's speed.
"Mike, there's no need to hurry!" Rachel shouted.
Mike merely turned his head around to look at his mother. His steps mantained a quick pace and Rachel sighed.
"I don't know what to do with him, anymore"
"Mike, calm down, will you?" Ross took a shot.
Again, the little boy turned his head around. This time, however, he slowed down. Rachel sighed once again, frustrated. It was like both Ross and Mike had a point and this was their way or showing it.
Ross' stare was fixated on his children's linked hands. Imediately, he brushed the back of his to Rachel's. They rubbed gently a few times, softly and playfully. But when he reached out to hold it, she pulled away.
"There's a nice spot right there" her voice sounded urgent.
"Actually, those guys are playing footvolley right there, the kids might get hit" Ross pointed it out and they kept walking.
Uncentain and bothered by Rachel's responce to his gesture, Ross looked around. Families, couples, flirts...
'If you don't do anything, she will leave tomorrow'
Ross walked closer to her and wrapped one arm around her waist. Rachel quickly looked at him surprised and took it off. She eyed him with annoyance in her eyes and motioned to the kids.
"Not here!"
Rachel's voice was so short and cold. Ross just stared at her, not wanting to believe his dream was really coming to an end.
"There's- there's a nice place there"
He started walking down his way to the place he'd spot. On the way there, he carried both kids on his arms, through squeals and giggles. Rachel had to brush away the tears from her eyes, which mixed with her sweat and the saltiness of the air. Her eyes stung even more, which caused them to water up again. So she just allowed herself to stand by and watch them from a good distance.
She didn't want him to think she was doing this for herself. She was doing this for him. Was he ever going to see that?
She sat down on a concrete bench and watched them. Even though Ross was smiling, playing with Ella and Mike, she knew just how much she'd hurt him. She'd just told him she was leaving him again and she didn't have to use words to do so.
Rachel opened Mike's wardrobe and pulled his suitcase from it. Having just finished packing her own bags and Ella's, Mike's were the only ones left. She set it on the bed and opened it. Back anf forth from the wardrobe to the bed, she got all of his clothes neatly folded inside. Later, she'd have him pick a few things he could bring with him. Not too many though.
Most of it had to stay behind.
It ached Rachel to realise Mike was not just leaving a fancy life and expensive toys. He was leaving possibly the most important person in his life.
To her great misfortune, her son entered the bedroom the exact moment she colapsed on the bed, both physical and emotionally exausted, closely followed by Ross. The later, quickly froze and stood by the door when he noticed what was happening. Mike also froze, but wore an angry expression himself.
"Hey Mike" Rachel smiled as much as she could. "C'mon, I guess you can pick up a few things to take with you. Maybe a soccer ball and that puzzle you and Ella were making the other day?"
"I don't wanna go!"
Rachel looked down.
"I'm sorry sweetie, but we all agreed we were leaving after two weeks, didn't we? That's tomorrow"
"I don't care, I wanna stay here with dad!"
Rachel quickly looked at Ross, but couldn't handle the guilt and pain it took.
"I'm sorry Mike, you don't have much of a choice"
"I do, he's my dad, he'll take me! Won't you, dad?"
Ross was cornered.
"Mike, I-"
"No Mike, you're going where I'm going!" Rachel cut Ross before he could get the chance to take her baby away. For some reason, she was now filled with builting rage
"Then stay too, mom!"
"Mike, I'm not saying this again, we're going tomorrow. Period!"
Mike stared at his mother.
"You're selfish!"
"What? Watch your tone and your mouth, young man!"
"I don't care, you are selfish! I want to stay here with my father!"
"You don't get to choose, Mike!"
"You don't love me, why would you want to keep me?"
"What? Of course I love you, Mike!"
"No, you, don't! If you did, you'd do what's best for me!"
Rachel knelt down. It was unbearable knowing nobody noticed she was doing this just because she loved them all too much
"Listen to me. I'm doing what's best for everyone, okay?"
Ross looked down.
"I'm doing this because I do love you, Mike. More than you'll ever know!" Rachel stroked Mike's hair. The little boy still looked pouty and frustrated. "Okay?"
Mike crossed his arms and ran up to his bed. He laid down and turned to face the wall on the opposite side. Both his parents watched his back for a while.
"Rachel, hm, can I talk to you?"
Rachel looked up at Ross, scared.
"Okay"
They left to the livingroom.
Sorry to leave at this point, but...! I'll ty to get the next chapter soon, but I can't promise anything. Tons of things getting in the way here! Please, reviews are very much welcome! :)