My dear doggy friend
"I guess it's not too bad." Bakura offered grudgingly, a trace of a smirk on his face, out of sight of Sirius.
"What do you mean? Not too bad!" Sirius replied offended, he had just shown Bakura his rooms and just because everything wasn't inlayed in gold! This little prince said it wasn't too bad.
"Well not too bad is good enough." Remus commented, filling his mediator roll. "He's just trying to provoke you Padfoot." He added in a less then mediator tone of voice.
"Padfoot?" Bakura commented skeptically.
"I'm sure calling me Padfoot will make the image of respect in our class room Moony" Sirius retorted not hearing or ignoring Bakura's question.
"Oh right, as if anyone could respect you!" Remus added his spirits rising and a grin surfacing.
"And who was lecturing on provocation." Bakura commented a little louder this time, all this was obviously going over his head, and obviously this fact annoyed him to no end.
Both men stopped mid retort and turned, looking as if they had just realized Bakura was there. Remus quickly straitened his face and went back to his dull factual manner.
"Anyway, Bakura, if you need anything I'm right to your left and Sirius –though I seriously doubt you'll need his childish opinion- is to your right if you walk straight out of your door." Remus replied taking a step backwards in the direction of the door. "The bathroom is to your right." He gestured in said direction. "And your bedroom to your left. The Great Hall is down the hall east, then just turn left and follow that hall north till you come to the Entrance Way."
"And if I want you two to get a life were do I go?" Bakura asked innocently.
"Then my dear little prince," Sirius replied sarcastically. "You join the line of the hundreds of other people who think that." He finished.
Bakura's anger flared at the 'my dear little prince' but he couldn't help but smirk a bit.
"But if we have your leave, we shall depart." Sirius added.
"What if I don't?" Bakura asked nonplussed by Sirius's immature behavior.
"I would just leave anyway."
"Then why ask?"
"Because..." well Sirius didn't really know why, and under Bakura's belittling stare he beat a fast retreat.
"He has about as much charm as you do when you go rolling in the mud." Remus commented dryly, a few minutes and feet of thick stone wall later. "Or that time you got fleas."
"I protest." Sirius pouted pulling a book off a library shelf; he was supposed to be brushing up on defense skills in the last week before school started.
"You're right; he has about as much charm as you on a normal day." Remus replied bemused as he to settled back into reading, though as Sirius figured it he didn't have much to brush up on. He had after all taught last just three years ago.
"You know that's not what I meant." Sirius protested.
"Yes I do."
"Moony?"
"Yes Paddy?"
"You know I hate being called that."
"You don't say! What, you've only told me about a million times before."
"Then why?... Anyway! Why do you think Dumbledore appointed me to this position?"
"He needs a teacher; you need a job to keep you out of trouble."
"But I don't remember half of this stuff!"
"That's why I'm here."
"Oh, that makes sense now."
"But what am I supposed to do?"
"Remus I thought we already answered that question. I Sirius and you Remus shall teach the midgets."
"I'm not Remus, idiot!" Bakura exclaimed; in his book dulled state Sirius hadn't noted the change in voices. Something in the air at the library dulled his wits.
"I don't know what you're supposed to do, Remus?" Sirius turned to his friend wondering if he knew the answer.
"Well at the moment he seems to be stalking you my dear doggy friend." Remus replied from behind a giant tomb.
"Why in this world or the next would I stalk Sirius?" Bakura asked, noticeably revolted by the idea.
"I don't know, why don't you tell me that?" Remus asked lowering his book and looking Bakura straight in the eye, for the moment unabashed.