Hot damn, I got another one!" Lucas Scott yelled with a laugh.

He reeled his line in and sure enough there was a fish attached to the hook.

"You're 0 for 3, Natey boy. You better get your ass on the ball."

"What, man?" Nathan asked, suddenly jolted back into reality.

"It helps if you actually use bait, dude. That's the point of fishing, to actually catch fish", Lucas laughed.

Nathan managed a meek smile and adjusted his sitting position on the dock. It was so beautiful out there over looking the lake. That place like so many others harbored years of memories. As far back as he could remember, that lake and that dock had always been a significant part of his life. He had been there many times with Lucas and Tim and other friends. His father had taught him to swim in that lake. His family had held picnics and reunions there. It had been a place where he had always felt such joy and comfort. Now it was a place where he had felt the loneliness and saddest in his whole life.

"Sorry, bro. I guess I'm kind of out of it."

Lucas put down his pole and petted his German Shepherd, Knight. It was tough to see Nathan going through hard times. He had hoped a nice day of brotherly male bonding at the lake would wash away all the pain even if just for a day. Instantly he knew he was wrong and how could he blame Nathan?

"You want to talk about it?"

"No. That's just the thing, Luke. I know everybody is just trying to help. Everyone wants to know if I want to talk about it. I do and then at the same time I don't. It's crazy, man. It's like I have so much going for me and then at the same time it's like everything is fucked up. It hurts and it's hard and I don't know how to deal with it."

"I know", Lucas sighed. "And honestly, I don't know what to say. I'm no psychiatrist or anything, I'm just your friend and your big brother. You know I'll stick with you through anything man and I wish there was something I could do. I can't imagine what you're going through. It must suck. I mean if it were me losing Brooke...man, I don't know what I'd do. I don't know how I'd handle it. I kind of feel like a hypocrite trying to tell you everything is gonna be okay. It's not gonna be okay, not for you and especially not for Peyton. But you'll get through it, man. And it might sound stupid or cliché but she'll be in a far better place where she won't have to suffer or be sick. And no matter what, she will always be with you."

"I know. That's what's in my head but my heart just won't get the message. I want her here. I want her to be okay."

"I know. We all do."

"I just keep thinking what a special part of my life she is. We've been together since we were kids. She was there in the beginning before all the contracts and TV stuff and fans. Pey was there when I was just the arrogant son of a bitch trying to live up to the impossible expectations of Dan Scott. Even though we're not together now and weren't when she got sick, I know a part of me thought that in the end we would get it together. You know? Forget the money and the hype and the groupies. We would end up married with kids and stuff. And now that won't happen. What should be the greatest time of my life feels kind of empty all of a sudden. That friend... that love is about to go away... forever. She is going to die and I don't want to face it."

"I visited her a couple months ago before she got really down. We went outside and sat on the deck and just talked about old times. Remember the time we wanted to go to the Creed concert and Uncle Keith's old truck broke down? We couldn't find a ride for shit and Peyton offered to 'borrow' her Dad's."

"I remember", Nathan said with a fond smile. "We borrowed it alright. Made it all the way to Raleigh and then some fuck face at the concert banged it up in the parking lot. Pey was so scared and you spent like all night at Keith's shop trying to fix it before her old man found out."

"Yeah, we had some great times. We were always getting into this and that. She's such a cool girl. She never acted stuck up or bitchy or anything. She was just one of us, you know? She'd kick off her shoes and try to shoot hoops with us on the court. Her lay-up sucked but she didn't care. Just as long as she was having fun."

"I know. We always had a lot of fun together. We just connected. And I'll never forget how she was there for me when I went through all that shit with Dad. So many nights I was a mess and she just kept it together for me. Pey was so good, you know? She's always there for me and for everybody. She was my rock."

"She did always know just what to do."

"I love her, Luke. I really love her, man."

"I know. Never forget that love, what she meant to you."

Nathan baited his line and cast it into the water.

"I'll never forget. Never. But it's weird."

"What's that?"

"We're sitting here talking about her like she's already dead. And in a way, she is. She's not the same. And that pisses me off the most. Not to be selfish, but that's the thing about the Leukemia that really gets to me. Not only is it taking her life, it's taking her spirit before that. She doesn't even want to see me anymore. She won't even let me love her. She says I can't come back. I guess she's embarrassed because her hair is falling out and the chemo is really wearing her down. It is hard to see her sick but I don't care about the physical stuff. Peyton will always be beautiful to me."

"What are you gonna do?"

"I don't know. Maybe I should stay away..."

"Don't. You'll end up regretting it. We don't even know how much time she has, Nate. You have to see her again. I'm sorry to say it, man, but it might be the last time."

Nathan sighed and nodded. It pained him more than anything but deep down inside, he knew his brother's words were true.