The Great Laughing Contest

"You know," Virginia reminded Jet, "If you do lose your memory, you'll forget what I taught you here. I know you don't think of it like that, but I feel like I can relate to you, since my ancestor went through a similar crisis. Perhaps knowing you're not alone will bring you comfort in this world. And I know you are not telling me the whole truth about how much you enjoyed that Solitaire game. After all, it's something you can do on your own, without having to socialize. Do you really want to forget all of the memories we shared on this adventure…forget me?" She looked at him with puppy dog eyes, the kind many can never resist.

"I can always learn that stupid game again, if I wanted to. It is of no concern to me if I play it or not. And who in the world cares that you can relate to me? That doesn't help me earn Gella. But the knowledge of my true origins will be a detriment to my search, so I must get rid of it. I have no need for memories, I told you that long ago. So, why should I keep the one that causes me discomfort?" he inquired in an angry tone. Hopefully, her concern for his emotional well being would show her that this was for the best anyway.

But Virginia was more worried about Jet's physical well being at the moment. Even if he survived, which was only a slim chance, he would most likely be badly injured. Could he continue his life in the Wastelands as a Drifter in that condition? He was relying on whatever had been used in his construction to let him survive with only his memories lost. However, Virginia didn't think he was any different from a human being. Sure he had advanced powers, but he was also constructed with the DNA of a regular human boy.

She looked at him, knowing she had to resort to her ultimate weapon. The girl asked him, "Hey Jet, how about we have a contest? If I win, you will come back to camp and act like this never happened. But if you win, I'll leave you alone." This was a risky gamble, but she was all out of options at the moment.

Although wary, Jet liked the idea. He could beat her easily at anything, and then she'd leave him to lose his memories. After all, he was stronger, smarter, and more experienced. The only thing she could beat him at was a race, but he could always use his Accelerator. He smirked. "Name your challenge."

"This one won't be easy for me," she told him, "But I know I can do it. I have no plans to race you, even though I can definitely win. Because if we raced, your Accelerator would be forbidden Jet Enduro. I propose a laughing contest. If I can make you laugh by midnight, then I win. But if I can't, then I lose."

'Laughing contest! She actually wants to have a laughing contest! Jet Enduro never laughs. I only hope that when she loses, she doesn't take advantage of my lost memories and take me back with her to camp. Because the day I laugh is the day Leehalt gives free candy to children on the street,' he thought.

Virginia stated, "Let's see…I'll start with some jokes. What's the difference between Leehalt and a hungry Diobarg? The Diobarg has much better manners! Get it..." His silence told her all she needed to know. This wasn't going to be easy, just as Virginia had thought. She began thumbing through an old book her father had kept, called Werner Maxwell's work standup routine. The girl had found it at Greenlodge, and it was filled with jokes about his workmates. Most of it seemed to mention the names Leehalt, Melody, Malik and Duran, as if those were the four most insane who would be the easiest to poke fun at in standup.

She finally came across one that looked interesting. "Ok, the other day I walked into Duran's room, and he had a large cardboard cutup by the closet. So I asked him, 'What is that for Duran?' And he told me, 'I'm going on a date tonight.' I wanted to know why he had a cardboard cutout, if he was going on a date. He replied, 'Vell, no girl vantz to date me, zo I had to improvize.' Later on, I saw him in the café in Little Rock, ordering food for his date. Then, the waiter asked, 'Sir, why do you have a cardboard cutout in one seat. Your reservation is for two.' And Duran said to the waiter, 'Ziz iz my date, and ze iz very hungry. I vould like zome zalad, after all, ze'z got to vatch her girlizh figure.' And I went home knowing that the entire mechanical aspect of the project depended on one loon." Jet didn't even crack a smile at Duran's incredible wackiness. It may not have been the funniest of jokes, but Virginia found the man's behavior to be simply hysterical. I mean, what guy is so desperate that he'll go out with a cardboard cutout anyway?

"Virginia, would you give it a rest?" Jet demanded, "It's only eleven, and I don't want to spend a full hour listening to your lame attempts at comedy. Why don't you just change it to something quick and painless that I could beat you at in under five minutes, then we can both get on with our separate lives."

"C'mon Jet, you really need to lighten up. Ok, so the joke wasn't that funny, but how about my own funny face routine? I was the champ back home, well the fact that Neil was the only other kid who played with me could have something to do with it. Just watch me," she bragged. Then, she began pressing her hands to her cheeks, making her face go long like a hotdog roll. Jet rolled his eyes, this was her best one?

Virginia, not one to give up, then stuck her tongue out and lifted up her eyelids. No movement came from the boy except an exasperated sigh. She put her pointer finger to her nose, and turned it up like a pig's snout. That face was accompanied by her impression of a pig. That too gained no response.

Jet exclaimed, "Face it, I don't laugh. I don't smile, I don't feel joy. I'm just a machine Virginia, only built to combat forces that go against Filgaia. The council had no reason to give me those emotions. Just leave me be, there's nothing you can do for me." With that, he began walking towards the cliff's edge.

But Virginia wouldn't allow him, she'd told him that the contest ran to midnight and he'd agreed. "Oh no you don't. I won't allow you to hurt yourself over something so stupid. Maybe your memories hurt you at times; I should know. I was there when my mother passed away, watched as she breathed her last and left me forever. I would like to forget that sometimes, but I never do. Because to do so, I would forget my mother, and the happy times we shared. What I'm getting at is, even though a memory hurts, you can't just leave it behind. Both sad and happy memories make us who we are. If you have only sad ones, you aren't complete. Same if all you have is happy ones. I know sadness too, you are not alone anymore Jet."

She began walking to block him from the cliff's edge. Hopefully, he wouldn't try to pass her. If he did, well he was taking her down with him. Virginia didn't fear death, she would see her mother again. And if Jet died, he'd be all alone. At least if she fell too, he would die with someone else who would take care of him in the afterlife. But Jet didn't make a move to pass her, as if he didn't want her to be hurt. In relief, the young maiden began to walk towards him, to lead him back to camp. Suddenly, the edge of the cliff gave way under her weight, and she just barely managed to grab hold of the rocks above her when it fell down.

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Teefa's Last Words…

I do bet at least one person will figure out what happens next. We don't have idiots reading my fics, and I'm predictable. You all know what kind of sappy stuff that I love.