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Chapter 18: Unfair

The next morning, the four teenagers met up as though nothing had happened. Remus apologized to the Potters for the short notice concerning his "family emergency", but assured them that his mum was now perfectly fine. As usual, they occupied a compartment together on the train.

"How are you feeling?" Lily asked Remus.

Remus winced. "A little scratched up," he confessed, lifting the sleeve of his shabby robes to reveals his wounds.

Lily tsk-tsked and pulled out her wand. In a flash, she had mended the cuts.

"I've been studying up on that," she informed him.

James was very impressed. "That's good Healing, Evans."

"I learned from a master."

James's chest puffed up in pride.

"Hippocrates Smethwyck."

James deflated. Sirius and Remus burst out laughing.

"That medical journal was really useful, Potter. You really must read it ," Lily continued, grinning.

James made a strangled noise. "Evans!"

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Reading again?"

Remus looked up from Hogwarts: A History and smiled. "Lily."

A couple of months had passed since they'd returned to school. Winter had passed, and the sun shone upon them once more.

Lily was poised with a Daily Prophet in hand, ready to attack. She sighed and dropped the paper onto the table when he whirled and faced her, a triumphant look on his face.

"You won't get me again!" he crowed.

"Darn," Lily grumbled. Then she tugged on his hand. "Come on, let's go outside."

Remus sighed very audibly as he closed the book. "At this rate, I'll never finish!"

Lily grinned. "So? Come on!"

They strolled out into a beautiful spring day. Students were milling about on the lawn, chatting. James and Sirius were sitting under a tree, showing off for Peter and a bunch of girls. Lily dragged Remus over to the lake and they sat.

"I love spring," Lily mused. "Everything's so green and fesh."

"I have to agree." Remus took a deep breath. "Ahh."

They appreciated the beauty of their surroundings for a while.

"Lily," Remus began. "I want you to start dating again."

Lily regarded him with wide eyes. "What?"

"I know you're still waiting for me," Remus continued. "And I don't want you to do that. It's not fair to you."

"I know it's not," Lily retorted, her voice beginning to shake once more. "But I can't help it. I still love you, Remus."

"Even if you waited a hundred years, nothing will change. I will still be a monster. And we can never be together."

"I've been praying and hoping that something would happen," Lily said quietly. "That some sort of medical genius would suddenly come up with a cure. I just feel like I can't give up on you. My heart—it won't allow me to."

"I know. I still love you as much as the day I met you." Remus allowed himself a little smile. "But love means letting go too, and that's I want you to do."

Lily stared out into the lake, her eyes trained on its blue, crystalline waters. Then she fixed her eyes back on him.

"It won't be easy," she said finally. "But I'll try."

Remus's smile widened. "I'm still glad I had you, Lils."

Lily threw her arms around him in a friendly hug. "Me too."

"So, any likely candidates?" she asked as she surveyed the lawn.

Remus cocked his head toward a tree. "Well, he's not such a bad guy."

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It was back to matchmaker for Remus as he and Sirius resumed the old scheme to bring Lily and James together. Things went far more slowly than last time, as Lily was quite resistant to James. Still, Remus continued to give his best friend tips on how to court her, and gave them opportunities to be alone together, as he had done before. But the difference was that now Remus was doing it happily. Slowly but surely, Lily's heart began to thaw. Remus and Sirius were thrilled when James told them that Lily had finally accepted a date with him for Hogsmeade.

"After so long!" Sirius exclaimed. "At last!"

"I'm glad for you, Prongs," Remus added, beaming.

James suddenly had a thought. "Oh no! It's this weekend, and I haven't got a single thing to wear!"

Sirius rolled his eyes. "You have robes. A whole closetful."

"Well yes, maybe, but which should I wear? The black robes from Madam Malkin's, the black robes I got from Mum and Dad, the black robes I got from..."

"You'd think he was a teenage girl on a first date from the way he's going," Sirius muttered to Remus. "Oh, come on, mate. The fashion guru is here," he called to James.

"I'm going to go find Lily," Remus announced before ducking out of the common room.

He spotted her, walking along the corridor with a newly-engaged Alice. With a quick congratulations to Alice, he dragged Lily away. They walked down a stretch of deserted hallway.

"So, James tells me you agreed to go out with him," Remus quipped.

Lily nodded. "I feel very date-deprived already. Besides, I thought he could use a little thrill."

"You're starting to like him again a little, aren't you?"

Her face reddened. "No—well, alright, maybe a little bit."

Remus grinned.

"A miniscule bit, Lupin. Very miniscule."

"Ooh, Lily..."

"Oh, stop it."

"I'm very happy, Lily," he said. "For you and James."

"Are you?" Lily's voice was uncertain.

Remus closed his eyes briefly and reflected on the past—reflected on the love they'd shared. It was definitely something that he would never forget, something he knew would never come his way again, that was for sure. But Remus no longer felt any bitterness, no more deep regret. His heart had healed now, with only the slightest scar to show. It was at peace.

"Yes," he answered. "I really am."

AN: Hold it! This is not the end yet, although it's very close. Anyway, I know you Remus/Lily shippers probably hate me right about now, but J.K. said that Lily and James are supposed to be together, so I can't really interfere with that storyline. Sorry...

Anway, I would like to thank Jacy, Alcapacien, and Carmel March for reviewing the last chapter! :) I love you guys!