A/N

I know, it's been about three weeks since I updated this story. I know you probably know that I'm going to say sorry, but here it is: I'm sorry. I really have been trying, but as some of you well know, the last few weeks of school are doozys with homework and I've been struggling to get everything and my chores done. I'll try to do better, and probably will do better as soon as I get past these last few weeks.

After an ill fated exercise in survival, after which Jamie and Julian had disappeared for a grand total of six hours under the pretense of gathering firewood, the amount of hysteria had died around the little shack they all were sharing with Danielle's elusive acquaintance, who was more than a little pleased that the two kids hadn't actually brought back firewood. But at the same time, it seemed he was a little put out.

Probably because if they had brought some back, he could have set fire to the shack and not have to care anymore about the X-men.

Though, whether it was because they would have no place to stay or some other reason, he didn't really know. And he didn't really care to. Arcane seemed to put up with them in only the slightest ways. Otherwise he ignored then.

Hanging upside down by his tail, he studied the man working on his car. He didn't really seem to know what he was doing, like Herr Logan did, but he seemed to know enough to keep the car running. Which was something to be said, considering the car was total junk.

He allowed his thoughts to wonder to his other mutant friends. Roberto and Amara would be showing up again soon. They had taken a quick trip abroad, but with the information that was bouncing around and the rumors flying, they were racing back to find out what was happening, and how they could help. It made him proud, in a way, except for the fact that any help they could give was hinged on the abilities of a young boy that was currently poking his head into a hole halfway up and old oak.

That would not end well. He could tell. It might end well for Julian, but something horrible was going to happen to whoever walked by.

Speaking of whomever…

Dust came from down the road. The dirt billowed up as a white van came unsteadily into view, obviously unused to the terrain. It screeched to a sixty mile an hour halt. The dust expanded and swept over Arcane, who seemed to be frozen in place. The car hood that he had propped up with an old metal rod moved uneasily.

Out stepped a rather frumpish woman in a suit, who was holding a basket, and smiling a fake smile. He covered his face with a three fingered hand.

A salesperson. From somewhere. Why did they even bother coming this far out?

She walked up to Arcane, her smile even bigger than before.

"Hello! I was wondering if you'd like some bath, body, and hair tonics and formulas in order to keep yourself healthy and good looking?"

Arcane just stared. He looked as if he didn't know what to say.

"Excuse me? Do you speak English?"

He looked as if he was seriously thinking about not speaking English.

The woman kept her fake smile plastered on, though she seemed to be twitching a little.

"This is…just great. They send me on this job and there's not one person out here except you and you don't speak English, that's just great." She was gritting her teeth now. "They think it's very funny, sending me way out here to find some reclusive millionaire, a millionaire wouldn't live in this hole, go sell some products, it'll be a big sale." Her voice was rising now and Arcane looked like he wanted to run away or at least walk away quickly. "But is there anyone? No! Just you, some immigrant, you might even be a mutant for all I know, the way you're wearing your clothes, or else you've just watched too many movies, some Shaft wannabe. Do you understand anything I'm saying? No! Those stinking…"

About this time Arcane was trying to inch away from her, to put his car between himself and this very annoyed woman. The woman started ranting loudly, scaring birds and catching the attention of a certain furred young mutant.

"I hate them all! I'm going to quit! And they'll be sorry, because I'm the best they have!"

"Hear hear!" Julian chirped loudly.

The woman whirled around to look at the small young mutant. Kurt froze and covered his eyes again, not out of hopelessness, but out of fear for how the woman would react.

The woman blanched and her mouth seemed to hang open for a moment. She shook her head and pushed some strands of mousy hair back.

"W-what are you?"

"I'm Julian. I'm camping." He seemed utterly innocent and angelic.

"Y-you're some kind of animal."

"Of course. So are you. Mom says that the only reason we don't usually think of ourselves as animals is because we have a shortened perspective. And she said some of us are stupid."

She looked totally speechless.

"I asked Mom once if that meant they didn't have brains. She said it was close enough, but when I asked her how they could talk without brains, she said lots of people without brains do a lot of talking. Maybe that's the problem with your coworkers?"

It looked as if the answer to all of her problems had suddenly turned into a little talking kangaroo wearing overalls with no shirt and the vocabulary of a sixteen year old with the maturity of a ten year old.

"Maybe you should be more assertive, I mean, it's always better to be assertive, Mom is more passive, but she's real assertive too, but she can get mean, but if you're assertive you can be nice and mean and it's expected of you, 'cause you're assertive. I don't know what I am. Maybe I'm passive. I dunno. But most of the people around the institute are assertive. But maybe you should tell your workers what you feel, that's all I'm saying. I gotta go now, there's a squirrel that thinks Kurt's ear is a nut, I've got to warn him…"

A sudden pain lanced through his ear, and he shouted and lost his balance, throwing off the squirrel and falling to the ground in a messy heap.

"Too late. Sorry Kurt!"

He popped his head up and glared at the little mutant. The woman just stared. She seemed unable to totally grasp the situation. Then something dawned on her. He suddenly felt a pang of fear.

She knew.

"I know what you are." She said excitedly.

Here it came.

"You're figments of my imagination! You've been sent to me subconsciously to help me with my work! Thank you! I believe in myself, I can do this!" She practically danced her way back to the van after she shoved her basket into Arcane's arms, who hadn't succeeded in getting away. The van groaned to life and did a turnaround that dented the rear end of Arcane's car. Then the van went barreling down the road.

There were several moments of silence. Then Julian's voice cut through the air.

"I would have liked to know her better."

"We all know her far too well already," Arcane said aggravated, moving around to survey the dent in his car.

He came closer to see what damage had been done to the car. He knew Arcane couldn't be even the slightest bit pleased.

"I guess since she thought vwe vwere imagination, she didn't think about ze car, ja?"

Arcane turned around slowly to glare at him. He smiled nervously. He began to backup as the taller mutant came toward him.

"Ooph!" The force of having a basket shoved into his arms caused him to stumble back a few steps.

"Go. Away."

Immediately, he decided that mocking that man would probably be detrimental to his health and decided to leave. He was joined by Julian, who was hopping up and down trying to see what was in the basket.

"Let me see, Let me see!"

A/N

Alright, I think I'm going to start updating one chapter of Camping effect for every few chapters of Morphos Effect, because a lot more happens in Morphos per day than I can fit into Camping.

I know some of you will think this chapter isn't as funny, but bear with me, I promise I'll get better, or I'll wrap this story up earlier than Morphos, which I may do anyway.

Asteria: No, I think Logan's training is just an unfortunate side bar.

Anon(girl): Heh, me too. I've read enough books to take care of myself, but I want hot/clueless to at least have a sense of humor.

Chaotic Dreamer: It would probably end up in a road trip, that, if the Professor had hair, would make him bald from worrying.

Aicha: Well, I'm glad you liked it! Hope you aren't late today!

Raliena: No worries, I like acting like a kid sometimes, I spent most of my life acting older than I was, and I like to act like a kid now. Funny, hunh?

Laureate: I only have bug issues with two types of bugs: ticks and centipedes. The latter is the only bug that truly scares me, and the former is my idea of the worst bug to touch. Yuck is all I have to say to them.

Anee/Arin Ross: I'm glad I could be of help. Hope you like this chapter!

Kally will take the reviews, and also hands out shampoo she got from some strange woman, if you all want it.