Disclaimers: I don't own Fruits Basket.

Summary: She was desperate for love. That was all that she had ever wanted and it was torn from her by Tohru... Will Kagura ever find solace in another person?

I'll Forget It All : Chapter Two

Kagura

I'm going to Shigure's house today, but it's nothing to be excited about because I'll see them together. I wish I didn't have to go, but I already promised Tohru-kun that I was going to help with their spring cleaning and I just can't cancel it so suddenly. She would probably beat herself up if I did.

Right now, I am standing outside of their door. I can hear clattering inside and I automatically know that Kyo is trying to hide from me, but I don't think I'll chase him today... after all, love is all about happiness. I guess it would bring me happiness to see them together, or at least to see Kyo happy.

He has never smiled at me the way he smiled at her. What was so special about her that people accepted her so effortlessly? Was it because she was an orphan? Was it because she cried and tried her best to make sure that everyone around her was happy? Was it because she never once thought about herself? Or, was it because they don't have someone to care about them like she does?

But, I care... Was it my relation to them? Did they think I only cared out of family? But, since when was I there to help anyone. I was never there for Hatori when Kana left him. I was never there for Ayame when he wanted to form a bond with Yuki. I was never there for Momiji, Kisa, nor Ritsu. I was never there to lend a helping hand when they needed it most. Maybe that's what made Tohru so different, her compassion to hurt herself to save others. No matter how painful it was, she would endure it just to make someone else happy.

I'm still in front of the house and when the clattering is gone I proceed to knock. I hear shuffling and the door opened to reveal Yun-chan, who looked down at me with his mysterious, blank smile and welcomed me into the house. I forced a smile onto my face as I entered the humble abode of Shigure. I knew that Kyo was hiding somewhere, underneath a couch perhaps, or behind the curtains. I didn't even bother to call out to him; instead I raced to the broom closet and came back with arms filled with cleaning supplies.

"Okay, where shall we start?" The trio standing before me, which included Tohru, Yuki, and Shigure, shrugged. Suddenly, Tohru's eyes brimmed with excitement as an idea popped into her mind. Finally her hands clasped before her in her signature posture as cheerful words spouted from her mouth.

"We should work with, um... partners! It's always easier that way because we could cover more ground. My mom and me were always partners when we cleaned, but we were the only ones there so it would only be natural. We also used to sing this song... the cleaning song..." Suddenly a shyness seemed to overcome the hyperactive girl as she blushed red, "You don't think it's a good idea do you... I mean it's okay if you don't want to work with partners. It was just a suggestion." At this I forced a smile onto my face knowing that was what was expected.

"Tohru, it's a great idea! So, who's with who?" She smiled bashfully, but before she could mention a name Kyo rushed to her side. Of coarse the happy couple would have to work with each other or it wouldn't be weird.

"I'm with Tohru." Kyo growled to intimidate anyone who disagreed. We talked a little and before I knew it I was paired with Shigure to clean the bedrooms and the attic.

"Okay! Let's get started!" I ran up the stairs and immediately started cleaning in Kyo's room. Upon entering the small room I saw that it was well organized with a study table near the door and the bed next to the window. It was as if I was switched into autopilot because my body just cleaned. I was void of any emotions and it seemed like cleaning was my life's joy. I started with the sheets. I replaced his thick comforter with his springtime sheets. Folding the huge comforter by myself was difficult, but somehow I managed.

By the time Shigure arrived there was nothing to do, but clean the windows and bring his laundry down. Shigure of coarse choose the laundry so as to not be cooped up in a small room washing windows. He picked up the small basket and made his way downstairs, singing his famous "high school girls" song.

I smiled to myself and picked up a small discarded rag. I sprayed the window with some water and started to wipe it with the rag. I made sure to make the window sparkling and when I looked at it I saw my own reflection. I looked normal enough, but I could tell something was different although others couldn't see it. My eyes seemed so empty, like two dark pits on my face. I looked past my reflection and immediately regretted it. Tohru and Kyo was having a special moment even though they were just hanging sheets.

They loved each other and it was very evident in their actions. Then suddenly, out of the blue, they kissed each other. Not a passionate one, but a chaste kiss that symbolized how pure their love was. He smiled down at her with a smile I have never seen till then and talked animatedly, not like when he was with me. Normally he would just mutter things to make me leave him alone, he would just cover his face as if he couldn't bare looking at me. He was happy, really happy when he was with her.

I felt tears roll down my cheeks and I stopped cleaning to wipe them away. I felt more alone then ever, but I guess loneliness at this point is okay because no one can see me cry. No one would know about my pitiful depression, my self-loathing. I mean, depression and self-loathing is just a phase, right?

"Kagura?" Fear consumed me and I racked my mind for any excuse for crying. I turned to the source of the voice to see Yuki holding Kyo's cleaned pillow covers.

"Oh... Yuki! Hold on! Something got caught in my eye... It really stings." To emphasize my point I blink a few times. I wipe my eyes once more and smile up at him. I knew it was an empty smile, but it was still a smile.

Pretending to have just seen the pillow covers he was holding I quickly get up and take them from his hands. From the corner of my eye I could see Yuki approach the window and was about to tell him not to, that Kyo and Tohru were out there together.

To calm my anxiety, however, he spoke. His voice clear of any emotions he might have felt at that moment. "This window is really clean."

I beamed at him trying my hardest not to look at the window in fear of seeing Kyo and Tohru, "Of coarse it's clean! The great Kagura cleaned it!" I giggled slightly and I could see his lips twitch into an amused smile. "Yuki, can you laugh?" The question just sprouted from my mouth before I was able to think. The questions surprised both Yuki and I.

He looked at me with his mysterious mask, but it was clear that a question was resting on his tongue.

"It's just that, I have never heard you laugh."

Yuki's face softened as he stared out the window. "I guess it seems like I never laugh. I have before... I was watching Kyo and Tohru play ping-pong. Tohru was so determined to do good, but she really isn't that great."

Yuki chuckled at the memory. Even memories about Tohru seem wonderful. It was as if anything related to her was sacred and brought happiness. I started stuffing Kyo's pillows into the new pillowcases when Yuki came to help me.

"It seems that Tohru really changed us all, huh?"

"Yes she did, she does not want to admit it... but she's really special." I felt tears threaten to leak out my eyes, but I forced them back.

"Yuki, are you still sad about Tohru and Kyo?" Again the question just spurted forwards. I wanted to take it back, but knew that what was done was done. Yuki shook his head.

"Kyo deserves her. He always wanted to be accepted... I guess its only right."

"But! I always accepted him! How could you say that he was never accepted?!" I stood up, ready to pound him into the ground. My anger had reached its peak. Mixed emotions filled my body, hate, anger, envy, and sadness. I didn't know what to do and pummeling him to the ground was the first thought to enter my mind. Yuki just smiled gently at me.

"Kagura..." For once he seemed at a loss for words, not like he showed it... but I could tell he could not word what he wanted to say.

"Yuki, it doesn't matter, he chose her and left me behind." There was a pause before I continued, "This room is cleaned, let's go to the next one."

Yuki nodded and walked out. I followed him, but something on Kyo's desk caught my eye. There was a picture, one of me, Kyo, and Tohru.

I had a large smile on and my arms were around Kyo's neck, but he didn't seem to be bothered because he was holding Tohru's hand and was leaning towards her. They were so close that they almost seemed to be embracing, I guess that's the only reason he kept the picture in the first place. It was like I wasn't even there. They were centered in the picture and I was almost standing in the back barely seen.

I placed the picture face down on the desk and followed Yuki out the room to the next one. I recognized the next room as Yuki's and found it a lot different than Kyo's. It gave off a mysterious, clean air that made you feel dirty. Everything was put in a certain order, that no matter how organized you normally are, it makes you feel insecure.

We both started cleaning when the door opened and Shigure entered the room with clean sheets.

"The great Shigure is here!" He smiled at everyone.

TBC

This definitely wasn't the best chapter, and reading it now I think it to be really horrible. Anyways, I've been editing my story and I found a lot of mistakes.