Such is life.

By Keo Siph

All Yu Yu Hakusho characters are owned by Togashi Yoshihiro/Sheisha, Fuji TV, Pierrot, and FUNimation.

Kurama blinked in open surprise at Koenma's words. However, in comparison, this was rather mundane next to Urameshi and Kuwabara's reactions.

"You've got to be kidding me!"

"What, did you resurrect the guy yourself to freak us out?!"

Koenma, in all his teenager-form glory, shook his head in mild disgust. "He wasn't dead at all."

"This is starting to sound like a mistake the idiot would have made." Hiei raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure this is the same crow that Kurama fought?"

"Yes, and thank you for that tremendous leap of faith, Hiei. I'm overwhelmed with gratitude."

"And, obviously, stupidity."

"You don't think much of the intelligence of others, do you Hiei?" Botan forwarded tentatively.

"Only 'cause he's shorter," Shizuru commented calmly, dragging on her cola. Hiei refused to acknowledge her comment.

"Yeah. What'd ya call it, Shiz', short-man syndrome?"

"Ever heard the term 'cat got your tongue', Yusuke? It was coined by you humans," Hiei sneered up at Yusuke. "During the glorious Dark Ages, after a traitor's tongue was cut, it was fed to whatever creature was nearby, usually a cat as they were kept for eating mice." Yusuke just smiled back.

"You did your homework! Good little boy!" He reached to pat the demon on the head, but was stopped by a sword in-between his first two fingers.

"You want to loose half that arm, Urameshi? Please, continue."

"Aren't we all in high spirits today?" Koenma asked, mentally debating whether it was worth the energy to get involved, or even finish the story. Kurama stood for a moment, before he turned down a side hallway, saying nothing.

"Well, that's new. I haven't been threatened by anyone half my weight in a while."

"Urameshi."

"Hm? Oh, yes, I should get out of the way, shouldn't I? But, I've always wondered: Is that hair of yours /really/ spiky, or is it actually just a fluff ball? Sort of like you-"

"URAMESHI."

"Hm?"

"… I'm not the one that is held captive by a single, /human/ girl."

"Do you really want to go there, Hiei?"

" /She/ is a /demon/, and can take /full/ care of herself."

"Are you saying Keiko can't?"

"Of course."

"Well, she has needed me a whole lot recently--!" He was plastered almost instantly into the door just closed by Kurama as Keiko tried to talk around her rage.

"Why! You! Freak! I! You! Argh! Like you know anything! You don't-! I do! I'm the one who--! Coward! You can't even take care of yourself! I'm the one who does laundry! Engaged! Took you YEARS! Monster! Left without a word! You! You! I can't stand it! Wacko! Freak! Pervert!"

"… Was that supposed to make sense?"

"YUSUKE!" BAM

"… Itai…"

"I truly don't understand you humans and your obsession with this engagement thing."

"Sometimes, Hiei, I don't either," Kuwabara sighed. He turned suddenly, eyes bright and filled with random celestial bodies and hearts. "Oh, but I'm sure Yukina understands perfectly!" Yukina answered across the room with a smile as Hiei snorted.

"No."

"Hm?"

"She doesn't beat you up."

"… That's just them! Heh, I know better than that! Not /all/ engagements are like that!" He paused suddenly, hand to chin in thought. "Not that /you/ would know anything about /that/."

"…"

"Have you been hiding something… NO! SomeONE from us, Hiei?" Kuwabara nudged Hiei's shoulder with an elbow. "You dog you! Who is--!" In an instant, Kuwabara was no longer on his feet, but instead flying through the air at the opposing wall. "… Itai…"

"Must be quite the lady," Yusuke noted from the sidelines as Keiko took a breather in her destruction.

"Kurama?" The kitsune pulled back from the wall, still allowing his arm to rest there, and turned to the Jr. King. "There's another part of this mission, you know. Karasu--"

"I don't care." Kurama interrupted abruptly. Koenma was the one to blink this time. "I… can't. I can't face him again."

"… Why? You did so well during the tournament!"

"No. I… that was Youko. Not me. Not me…" He turned and let his head fall back against his arm up against the dreary wall, covered in moss and grime. Water dripped on Koenma's head, so he shifted a bit.

"You don't have any more of that seedling?" The water no longer pooled on Kurama's head, but dropped noisily to the floor.

"None at all."

"… I see. But, would it interest you to know that this is also a rescue mission?"

"You sound like a life insurance salesman."

"I'm selling the saving of his life. Supposedly, this guy was revived by Karasu, and now sits in the darkest underground chambers of the fort."

"And who told you that?"

"A little songbird."

"Like a songbird would go underground."

"Karasu wouldn't either."

"So… The guy's beyond Karasu's reach? Then why'd Karasu revive him anyways?"

"Karasu… seems to have acquired some new abilities. I think this guy was practice, then the crow stopped caring."

"You're speculating." Kurama had yet to move from the wall.

"That's true. I really have no idea why the bat-winged resurrected guy is down where Karasu hates going." Kurama jumped at these words. "… where Karasu hates going?" Koenma tested again for another jump.

"No… the bat-wings. Reminds me of a Marvel comic Kuwabara was reading."

"Heh, not a bad lie. Not good enough, but not bad. Here's a picture that the /songbird/ got for us."

"I still don't know why you're being secretive about a spy. Like you expect us to defect and start a war against you or something." Kurama gingerly took the picture from Koenma's hand, refusing to turn around. He tilted it until the light was right, then stopped moving.

"Is that a sign of recognition?" Koenma leaned forward hopefully, only to hear deep, shaking breaths that racked Kurama's body. Red hair slid past skin as he slipped closer to the wall.

"… his favorite human book was always Bat-man. Always…"

"Kurama?"

"…" The hand holding the picture fell limp. "…" The hand against the wall spasmed between clenched, white knuckles and being limp. Salt water littered the already damp floor as Kurama's shoulders shook viciously. There was a sudden stop, then Kurama whipped around, red hair flying out and hitting Koenma across the face, tears ripping off in every direction. A hand slammed into Koenma's chest. "I'm going! Take you freakin' picture!" His other hand bled from nails marks on the palm. "Kuronue is coming back to us!"

Rump hit stone as they paused in a glade. Yusuke stared upwards as clouds drifted in their stream, Hiei leaned delicately against a tree, Kuwabara was splayed across a stone, and Koenma sat in the shade rigidly. Only Kurama stood still, looking straight ahead as if it was his greatest fight to stop moving.
"You must understand why they can't know."

"Like I don't already."

"… Karasu's become something of a djinn, a being just less than angel or god, with a mortal body, but one that follows no rules, as even the gods do."

" … Am I to assume, that I could not defeat him in my current state?"

"Of course."

"Hey, let's just sit around long enough for our teeth to fall out, then we'll go get Karasu!"

"Urameshi…"

"You couldn't give him that defeating smile then, could you?" Koenma bounced back instantly over Kuwabara's groan.

"The four of you can defeat him, no-hands-down. However. If they don't go in all guns blazing, they'll be the ones going up in smoke. And as you surely know--"

"-- I'm not only the only one for the job, but the most stealthful and I know Karasu the best. Anything else?"

"… Don't get carried away when you go into the battle, alright? I'd be serenely worried."

"Is that a good choice of words?"

"You sound like you know what a smile is, Koenma. Like you have teeth behind that sucker."
"So, you're comin' Kura- Hey! You gonna respond?"
Kurama's eyes still sat in shadow.
"… I… "

"Hm?"

"Let's go. I'm all for the burial of the crow forevermore."

Grass bent away from the demon as he shuffled forward and took up watch on the other side.

"Why are you here again, Koenma?" Yusuke asked the clouds.

"… I shall show thou the way, young grasshopper."

"Oh, shut up. Seriously."

"I do know the way."

"… You could have told us."

"That I knew the way?"

"You could have given us a map like you usually do."

"Or, even less," added Kuwabara, otherwise seemingly comatose, "You could have given us a few directions and a portal, which is even more common and less useful."

"True. But, this is a hard map to draw, and I doubt we'd trust this sort of mission to Botan's mapmaking skills."

"Or, you could have told us the way."

"'tis more complicated than that."

"Quit with the grasshopper gig, alright? Pacifier breath… Like I'd answer to you unless I had too."

"If I didn't need you, grasshopper, I'd step on you and feed you to the praying mantis. Would that make you feel better?"

"Does that make us even?"

"I believe so."

"Aright! Let's get going again."

"It's quite the fortified… er…"

"Fort," Yusuke finished Kuwabara's sentence without pleasure.

"But, it's so--"

"White?"

"And, it looks like… like…"

"A hospital?"

"Can you say," Koenma drawled from behind the two, "Stupidity impulse?"

"Oh, shut up! You didn't tell us he was running a hospital! These hospitals are really starting to freak us out, you know…"

"As long as you don't do what Yanagisawa did…" Yusuke trailed, remembering the copy-tentei in drag after posing as a female nurse.

"Eh?"

"Since that is a long, involved story that took Kurama two hours to tell the first time, and he has some semblance of the mastery of the language, let's not go over it again," Hiei calmly stated, walking right past the trio. Kurama lagged behind a small amount.

"Okay, we made it through the sliding glass doors, now what?" Yusuke glared around the room, daring it to answer. "… Anyone?"

"Oh! Clients at door fifteen!" A quick-footed nurse called over a shoulder as she raced past. "Do excuse me, the doctor will be here shortly to see you. If you need immediate attention, the ER is on the right hall, third hall on the right. Thank you!" She bustled off again, scribbling notes as she went. She was out of sight in an instant. In the next instant, Kuwabara and Yusuke were leaning around the corner, watching her run. A large piece of the tile took them both in a single hit.

"Itai… what was that for? Who the--?" Yusuke looked at his three comrades, none of which was anywhere near the missing tile, and all of which were staring at him with mild interest.
"Something wrong?"

"…Er…" Yusuke stared at the three weirdoes before turning and aiming for the hall across the room, on the right side. "We'll get to see someone in charge this way." Kuwabara was just behind him.

Koenma watched them amble on, holding their heads before turning and shooting a thumbs-up sign at Hiei, who glowered. As soon as Koenma turned back and continued walking, Hiei let a smirk cross his face, and shook his head as though it was all hopeless. Kurama bit his knuckle to keep from laughing aloud.

"M-Mist-ter! P-please let us ex-explain!" The stuttering secretary was leaning as far away from the desk as the wall allowed, and Yusuke leaned over.

"Yeah, explain directions!"

"We-we /were/ run by Dr. Karasu, until his malpractice was tried in court, and he was honorably discharged."

"… You discharge patients, and you honorably discharge men in arms, so…"

"We are considered a military organization for our fight on cancer, polio, and other such diseases. We also have to fight the clients and patients at times, so Karasu was always welcome. But…"

"But what?" Yusuke cried impatiently. "Did he kill his patients? Did he infuse different genes into his blood? Did he splice their sperm? Did he take DNA samples without permission and try to recreate the patient? Did he perform unnecessary surgery? Did he torture them? Bar B Q them? Roast them? Forget to sterilize himself? Practice brain surgery? Build rockets in their gut? Did he feed their toes to his pets? Did he make them his pets? Did he use their rei energy for making more of his bombs? Did he blow them up? Did he use their bones for clocks? Or, did he skin them? Possibly, did he forget painkillers? Did he perform mind-tricks on them? Did he…" Yusuke paused suddenly, as if what he was about to say was unthinkable. Then he leaned over, one hand cupping his sound, and continued, "…make them watch endless hours of Sponge Bob?" The nurse stared for a moment before bursting into laughter. Yusuke pulled back. "No! He used laughing gas!"

"Is Yusuke flirting or trying to get--!" Hiei was abruptly cut off by Koenma's hand, which was soon red with bite marks.

"… That's a new low, Hiei." Koenma nursed his wound by running to the nearest water fountain. "Now I have to disinfect it! No clue WHAT's running around in YOUR mouth."

"I don't think he was going to say what you thought, Koenma," Kurama carefully noted, edging closer to the nurses desk as Yusuke went back to all the horrible things Karasu could have done. Now, however, he seemed to be trying to get the nurse to hurl. Kurama was to far away to hear most of it, but as he reached over for the directory he caught a small splurge:

"… then he took out their intestines for the crows to feed on. Oh, wait, that could have been him…" Kurama shook his head and started looking under 'K' when he paused. Hiei and Koenma looked up as Kurama smacked himself in the head.

"Kurama?" Kuwabara asked, turning away from Yusuke's conversation somewhat green.

"I… don't know Karasu's last name." Everyone pondered this for a moment and, in the silence, Yusuke's words could be heard clearly.

"Well, then there's the possibility he gouged the eyes before the teeth were pulled, and then the patient wouldn't have known /what/ was worse…"

"Please, sir, Dr. Karasu did none of that!"

"Well, then, what was he discharged for?"

"… not keeping adequate records, and stealing mid-level painkillers."

"Hah, I knew i--t… That's all?! How--"

"Oh, the painkillers were aspirin, I assure you. He just didn't waste the time to go buy his own, as would have been efficient."

"Crud."

"So, we're back at square one?" Hiei snarled as they left the abusive building behind them. The white walls were making him drowsy.

"Well, my square one. Not yours, really. You're back at, like, negative square three or so," Koenma grumbled. "I started out with no info to go on, just as we are now, while you started out AFTER we did all the researching, mapping, and info-gathering."

"Koenma, don't rhyme. It's pitiful," Yusuke ordered with tired efficiency. Koenma's elbow caught him in the side. "Yeah, thanks."

"So, how did you know all that torture-stuff, Urameshi?" Kuwabara leaned over, grin spreading. "Have you been experimenting or somethin'? I mean, with Kei--!" Kuwabara's bent over form was soon in contact with a nearby tree.

"Stuff it, idiot!"

"However, Yusuke," Kurama noted softly, calmly, hoping to keep him from brandishing more of his wrath before they got to Karasu. "You did seem to know what you were talking about back there."

"Heh, heh!" Yusuke put a finger to his nose's bridge, rubbing it with a smug look on his face. "Yes, I do know a few more things, don't I?"

"So? What's up with that?" Kuwabara had pried himself from the tree and was next to Yusuke again.

"Well… you see, it's all Keiko's fault!"

"So! You DID start experimentin' wi--!" He found another tree, face first.

"NO! She made me study and study and study… Then I had ALL this knowledge and nothin' to use it on, 'cause the only serious schools are law schools and medical schools, so I thought law would be sort of useless when I rule the Makai, next time the tournament comes around, so I decided that medical school wouldn't hurt… Hey! Stop looking at me like that! I told you it was all her fault!"

"How many years?" Koenma managed out past an awe-struck face.

"Oh… so far? Four! Four fricken' years with a bunch of nerds and wimps and--"

"You enjoy it?" Kurama tactfully noted before Yusuke went on another rampage. He was acting more like Keiko than he thought.

"… Yeah. All that medic stuff's sorta cool…" He grumbled irritably, before pointing at Kuwabara. "AND YOU don't even GO to collage yet, stupid! I always KNEW I was ahead of you SOMEWHERE!"

"Oh, SHUT UP Urameshi! I am TOO at collage!"

"They must have lowered the standard for you both to have gotten in…" Hiei said to a tree.

"That's not right! I--! What, Urameshi?"

"I'm trying to see if you're lying," Yusuke replied dryly as he looked curiously at Kuwabara's face. Yusuke backtracked as he nursed a head wound from the carrot-top.

"I'm in the theatre arts! I'm currently enrolled in a fine arts collage, third year. One more year there, then another two in a finishing fine arts school, then I'm done! Soon, you'll see me in the big screen!" Kuwabara made a sweeping motion with his hands, broadly looking up at the star's lights. Yusuke stared blandly past his hands to the sun.

"You keep staring up there and you'll burn your eyes out."

"Shut up!"

"So, you two seem like you know what you're doing. Hiei? Where will you go after this?" Kurama nonchalantly asked, giving the fire demon out of the corner of his eye a look that he better not cross. Hiei rolled his eyes.

"Oh, stop the theatrics, Kurama. I shall just /die/ from your poor acting."

"You didn't ANSWER, Hiei/chan/," Yusuke baited over the demon's shoulder. There was a pause, then Yusuke hit the ground full on his back. "Okay, I may have deserved that."

"Since you won't shut up until I tell you, I intend to go plunder and burn Makai village after Makai village. Hopefully, this will all be across the sea from where I'm well known."

"Oh! So, you're becoming a pirate!" Kuwabara's cry slowly drifted on the sudden silence.

"W. H. A. T?"

"A pirate!" Yusuke was on his feet in an instant. "It's so perfect!"

"… What?"

"I don't believe that Hiei is familiar with the term /pirate/."

"They're basically demons who cruise the sea and plunder villages, then leave them burned. Usually one captain, since they are on a ship, and a full crew of first mate, second mate, deck-swabber, etc." Yusuke said with enthusiasm. "They're ALWAYS hated by society. They do a lot of treasure hunting, too."

"…" Hiei glared straight ahead for a moment. "I could… possibly… handle that." The others exchanged smiles.

"So, since you brought it up Kurama, what'll you be up to after this?" Yusuke snuck up to Kurama's shoulder, looking up slightly at the taller man. Kurama's shoulder's shook a bit from withheld mirth at the sight of Yusuke's curiosity. He really hadn't changed too much.

"I still don't know, actually. I decided becoming a botanist would almost be cheating."

"You could be Hiei's first mate." Yusuke's thumb jabbed at the short one, who glared in return.

"I'm not letting any demon traitors on MY ship."

"Like you could ever get one, scallywag!" Kuwabara sneered before another fist connected with his jaw. He gave up talking as a pastime for the time being.

"Really." Yusuke was walking backwards in front of the fox, laying the pressure on.

"I don't know…"

"Really?"

"Truly."

"Come ON!"

"…?"

"I know you know."

"Is that so?"

"Way so!"

"So…?"

"So."

"So."

"JUST TELL ME ALREADY!"

"I… could be Hiei's first mate."

"… Argh…"

"Or maybe co-star…"

"…ARGH…"

"Maybe a patient of yours…"

"…"

"Actually, I was hoping to--"

"No! Don't want to hear it! Don't care, NOW!" Yusuke turned on his heel and kept walking ahead for a while, before he suddenly turned. "Well?"

"… A security system designer."

"You're kidding."

"Not really. And, I'd be the best for the job, both in the Ningenkai and the Makai."

"Is that so?"

"So."

"Koenma!" Yusuke cried happily, turning away from the plant-creature. "What'll YOU be up to?"

"Now that…" Koenma put a vertical finger to his lips, as if hushing him, "… is a secret!"

"Not you, too! Oh! But, I've got ALL ETERNITY to bug it out of YOU!" Koenma sweatdropped as Yusuke rushed in front of him, attempting to glare him down. Koenma just smiled back.

"So? Are we going to wander around all day?" Kuwabara asked suddenly as he realized they didn't have a destination. The others shrugged.
"… This is a waste of time." Hiei noted as the walked out of another forest, onto another glade, across from another forest. Kurama smiled and Koenma rolled his eyes.
"WE'RE NOT GETTING ANYWHERE!" Yusuke cried, pointing at a nearby tree. "WE'VE PAST THAT ALREADY!"

"… and?"

"… Fine. Just keep going."

"Just keep swimming! Just keep swimming! Just keep--! I'll shut up now…" Kuwabara trailed after being deflated by Hiei and Yusuke's glares. "Sorry."

A pause in the group's descent into the woods came as the ground shook violently. Yusuke, Hiei, and Kuwabara looked up, expecting an airborne enemy. Kurama and Koenma stared down at the ground as it began to crack open.

"Yusuke!" Kurama's snapped warning caught the half-demon by surprise, causing him to look down just in time to see Kurama fall upward, past him. He hit a rock bottom after the earth stopped crumbling in. Yusuke sat forward, rubbing his hurt bum.

"Alright, Kurama. From now on, you warn me of WHAT is going on, not WHAT MY NAME IS!"

"Ah, so the delicate /Kurama/ is here today as well. How… charming." Yusuke turned to the voice, effectively flipping himself around… and undoing what little settling the rock had down. A small rock slide carried Yusuke to the ground floor, where he gripped his bleeding nose instantly. "I must say, that was delicate."

"Yeah, thanks, Karasu."

"Kurama's here somewhere, for sure!" Kuwabara cried behind him, where the cascade of ground had only broken the second floor. Kurama, on the third floor going down, had no idea where the other three were, and didn't really care. His problem was most likely on an even lower level. He raced towards the stairs.
"Rei Gun!" The blast ripped through the wall right past Karasu's head. He just smiled from his slightly tilted position before waving blades of water at the Tentei. Kuwabara jumped, rei sword ready, into the path of the attack. He hit the wall as Hiei passed him in the other direction, snarling and sword bristling with purple, black, green flames. The striation where Karasu had been rippled with the heat as he bounced off the ceiling, making it burst apart as soon as he left it. The air around Hiei crackled forebodingly. Yusuke was already firing after the crow again as Kuwabara dodged around the rock pile, then vaulted to the enemy.
"Mazes, mazes, mazes!" Kurama groaned under his breath. Usually, he could stay calm, but even considering his role in life, this was not a usual turn of events. "Stupid, stupid, stupid!"

"Dear, dear Kurama! My dear Youko…" Karasu's slithering sound emanated from the hall before the fox, who slid to a stop.

"Why. Can't. We. Hit. Him.? Hm? Any answers?" Yusuke snarled over a shoulder to Hiei and Kuwabara.

"You can't aim, dear!" The rippling voice of their opponent reached their ears just as the sound of dripping water raised their heads.

"We're under a lake, aren't we?"

"Not so lucky, deary. Not so lucky." Karasu flew at them, water gushing from one hand only to explode as it washed through the air.

"Alright, when water starts blowing up, we're in trouble!" Kuwabara cried the obvious.

"If you could make this any more painful for our ears Karasu would have HIRED you!" Hiei snarled over a shoulder as he raced away from the threatening water.

"Long time, no see, Crimson," Karasu calmly called out to Kurama, who was backtracking frantically.

Nearest exit, back three floors. Nearest door, back five hundred feet. That's all too far! Flame caught the wall a few inches from him and kept going.

"Tigers and lions and bears, oh my--FIRE!" Karasu backpedaled in mid-air as fire leapt from the base of the wall near him, exploding only to reveal another fire-coated Karasu.

"… Am I supposed to understand this? At all?" Urameshi dead-panned.

Kurama slid and slipped down dangerous steps only to meet more stone. And nothing else. He spun madly in the room, unable to find any exits before turning to his entrance… or more stone, as it could now be called. He rammed a fist into the wall, ensuring that it was not an illusion.

"Join the club, bub." A slithering voice spoke from behind. As Kurama whirled, his locks blurred his vision, red tainting the sight he had needed for so long. "If you want the truth, all dead ends lead here. My design, after all."

Yes, of course! The best person to design a safety device is one who breaks them the best!

"Kuro--"

"--an' away!" Kuwabara cried as he swung a large brick at the creatures, effectively ending their tirade against one another.

"What was that for?"

"Yeah, we need to sort out why there are TWO of us!"

"Well, we know WHY, don't we, Mr. Pyro?!"

"Oh, Leaky Faucet, like you wouldn't know about breaking the rules!"

Urameshi leaned in towards Kuwabara. "Like they have those things. Even we don't."

"Very funny, Urameshi, considering you were in lead when running away."

"The best at something at all times!" Yusuke was rather proud, and struck a pose.

The ground rippled suddenly, from the gray stone to a checkered black and white with rather odd lighting effects, given from the ceiling. One section fell away to reveal a rising ace's card, working as the elevator for:

"Karasu!"

"… Kuwabara," Yusuke grumbled, "Why are you so surprised when this is the third one?"

"Wow. You looking for me or something? I thought I was good enough to keep my name to myself and employees. Hey, are you that black market dealer Fred Lou's kid? You've got his face, and the mum's hair… but, you're too old for that, right? I mean, they've only been married for four years…" Kuronue paused with a mischievous expression. "Ah, so all those lies about being 'straight in the wrong direction' were an excuse to get away from the fiancé and a cover-up for their love child before marriage!"

"No."

"Really?"

"Real."

"Then he must still be gay. What a shame, I've got a few girls I could hook up with him…" He trailed off while watching water drip down the walls. "You weren't sent by anyone in particular, were you?"

"… It's a rather long story…"

"Not that red-haired ferry lady of the Styx, right? I mean, come on, it was just a joke…" He grumbled, shifting in his manacles that held him against the wall. "One way or another. Help?" He looked up with a goofy, lop-sided grin.

"… Kuronue?"

"Hm?"

"… You're not acting like yourself."

"I'd probably tell you the same, if I knew you."

"You do."

"Is that so? I must have missed the memo for 'bringing-the-obscure-relative-to-dungeon' day."

"It's not like that…"

"What? I'm not related. Well, that's too bad. I'd like to have a little girl that looks just like you, miss."

"Shut up."

"Well. Mine isn't among you. Keep an eye on them, my--…" Karasu the Latest trailed mid-sentence as he finally locked eyes with his two former incarnations. "Excuse me, but what are you doing like that?"

"Um."

"Yeah, that explains everything, like Microsoft Windows Version 2.2 that STILL doesn' work." Urameshi ground out at the slightly unhelpful second arrival. This produced many stares. "You have no idea how worthless Microsoft software is, do you? It was a joke completely lost on everyone who doesn't use it for charting and… Get the sticks out of your rears and start talking!" He snapped, back to his old ways. Everyone in the room visibly sighed. "Alright. Fine. I can't change, but everyone just blinks and goes one when THREE KARASU's pop up. Freaks."

"Hasty, aren't you? We haven't even started dating, and here you are."

"I'm saving you. Weren't you just talking about daughters?"

"Rhetorically. I bet they don't even use that anymore, except for the kids in class that are--"

"Why do I care? More importantly and less rhetorically, why are you looking the gift horse in the mouth?"

"… You're not a girl, are you?"

"What?"

"Girls are very careful to not call themselves horses."

"Maybe I'm a special breed."

"They don't talk about breeding, either. They talk about love. Guys talk about breeding like they do it everyday."

"You have changed. It was just so horrendous, I didn't notice it."

"Change back. Now. You know you're not allowed to wear my skin."

"But it induces FEAR! You should have SEEN their reaction to it!" Pyro cried.

"THAT's the reason I don't let you borrow it. I want to see their reaction. Not you."

"It's not going to hurt anything if you kill them, though, right? No damaged reputation?" Leaky Faucet asked politely, twiddling fingers.

"Not if YOU kill them." Karasu was patient. The three Reikai Tentei had never seen this before.

"Why aren't they dead?" Hiei asked. Karasu turned, mildly surprised.

"What? Why? What a silly question. I made them."

"Is there some demon code you guys are going by that I don't know about?" Yusuke jumped in, almost spastic. "Why does he know what you're talking about? Why WOULD they be dead?"

"He would have killed them, in the past, for insubordination. But they're his." Hiei spat the word. "Whatever that means."

"I made them." Karasu was smiling like a school child who just did a backflip, landed on his head, came down in a break-dance move, and bounced off the dirt ground olympic-style. In short, he couldn't be happier. "Thus, they're mine."

"Whoah, wait, that still doesn't--"

"Alchemy. But, they'll explain it. I can't hold off the alure of your friend's scent another moment. Not another. Boys? Can you handle them?"

"Yessire! Of coursesire!"

"Freaks o' nature acting like boy scouts. Yeah. And we get stuck getting taught by them. Rat Tooth from school's got nothing on these guys."

"If that lock could be picked, don't you think it would have been by now?"

"I noticed that. You should notice what I'm doing." Kurama stepped back, waiting patiently. Eyes glittered with anticipation and pride, while focused on the metal ring surrounding the left arm of Kuronue.

Karasu's eyes watched the checkered shaft above him close as he left his children with their toys. They couldn't die, but they would not win. They'd most likely be left for dead, nothing to it. That's life, after all.

His eyes focused in front of him, then past the wall sliding by. He'd reach the stone room containing the two soon.

But, in the mean time… why DID they take on his form?

"Whatever you're planning, I'm guessing it's taking longer than expected? Figures I'd be rescued by a guy-girl like you."

"Guy. Male. Man. Masculine. And, the temperature down here's wrong. So, it will grow slowly."

"Did you just now remember that?"

"No, you--"

"Men! Gentleman! Please, let us not squabble amongst ourselves! There is TRUE work to be done…" Karasu's voice echoed from above. Kurama and Kuronue's head tilted upwards, towards a large, square hole in the ceiling. With nothing coming through it. "As I said: True work. I need help. I've become stuck in my elevator."

"Rescued by me and captured by him. Which one REALLY tarnished that ego of yours?" Kurama asked, voice so gentle it pierced. Kuronue winced.

"Forgiving fellow, aren't you?"

"Well, Demolition work is work." Karasu pondered a moment before the blast came, exacting dust across the floor and the heads of the two demons. The was a thud as Karasu hit the ground. "I must work on my entrances, no?" He stood up and did away with the dust.

"Are you going to rescue me, too? This red-head's going so slow, even you could do a better job. Really."

"A fire imp and a water sprite?" Yusuke raged. "Not Karasu, just some imp and a SPRITE? Two FARIES?'

"No. I'm the sprite," Pyro replied, setting himself down from his previous floating position. He drew a hand threw his red hair, being very careful to miss the miniature black wings protruding from it as gray eyes stayed locked on his opponents. Another hand dug into the pockets of a mix of goth and plaid clothing. The other shook his head.

"And I'm the imp." The fishnet-and-castaway-pants clad Leaky Faucet shrugged. "Sir Karasu was very particular about that."

"He would be. Weirdo."

"We have to agree." Pyro and Leaky Faucet said in unison.

"Interesting high school life, he said." Pyro said softly. Quietly. "These are the remakes of his closest, and only, friends."

"Well, I guess that makes sense…" Yusuke said, still suspisious.

"Demons have high school?" Kuwabara cried.

"Sure." Everyone stared at Hiei. "Where else did they all learn to be such idiots?"

"So, it begins…" Karasu's voice held Kurama still. "Will you take on that pretty form like last time?"

"…" Kurama's mind raced. He couldn't fight Karasu as he was, and he couldn't change.

He kept running through this thought, letting it be ingrained in his head before finishing the sentence.

…if this was true, he would die.

That wasn't going to happen.

"Don't care about school, don't care about pity. You're in our way!" Yusuke surged forward, Rei Gun ready.

"But do you know where you're going?" Pyro asked suddenly. The three detectives stared for a moment. Then, in a blur of black, Hiei's sword was at Leaky Faucet's throat and his other hand had the neck of Pyro.

"No. But you two will show us the way." Pyro nodded in numb shock.

"I'll expect a few of your old tricks and, to speed things up a bit, the previous attacks, such as making a diversion long enough to let the seed you've more than likely placed inside me already grow and either root me to the spot or kill me, won't work. Mostly since it can't feast upon my blood, since I don't infact have any." Karasu raised a hand at the shocked fox. "And from that look I'm guessing I'm right. But here, see for yourself." With a flick of a finger, his left arm exploded off, landing on the ground. There was no blood. Karasu carefully picked it up, placed it back where it belonged, and waved with it at Kurama, who restrained from shuddering.

Everything about this crow had always rubbed him the wrong way. This was just icing on the cake.

"And don't expect a repeat of your little skirmish with Toguro, either." Kurama stiffened. "The Sinning Tree only recognizes those with flowing blood. Most plants do, and I don't expect you'd carry one of the three that don't."

Kurama mentally checked off all of his arsenal. None of them would do what he needed.

"It's actually a long story as to how this worked. You see…" But Kurama wasn't listening. Karasu smirked as he realized that he could have said that "a cow did a voo-doo dance and created a new body for him from grass" and his opponent wouldn't have noticed.

"Plants?" Kuronue's voiced sounded sharp in the otherwise sound-devoid room. Two heads turned, hair whipping through the air. "You use plants? And old friend of mine did that…" Kuronue's eyes glazed over. "Of course, he didn't need them much. He could have had a simple katana and been just fine. Pity he didn't. He would have made quite the samurai legend, no?"

"So, you haven't realized?" Karasu's voice was low and viscious. "The one that left you to die--!" The rose whip encircled his mouth. "Now, now, Kurama. I've wanted you to use that for some time, but we have company right now."

"Now's not the time for that."

"I certianly agree, koi, but you are the one pulling out the whips and chains."

"Um, Karasu?" Two heads turned back to Kuronue. "You seem to be the one for chains and manacles."

"Oh, yes! Kurama, you supply the whips, I'll take the--"

"Can you two shut up?" Kurama sighed suddenly. "I'm not sure it's physically possible to not talk for you two. You never shut up. It must be a form of breathing or something. If you don't stop, you die." Kurama considered suddenly.

"That would be a boring fight though, koi."

"Yeah. No action." Kuronue groaned.

"You're one to talk. You're dead."

"Yes, yes that's true."

"How many backroutes are we taking?" Yusuke growled at Pyro, who walked directly in front of him. Pyro turned only to feel the Rei Gun power up along his spinal cord. A gulp and he kept walking.

"The most direct route I know."

"Sure."

"Are you sure you know the shortest way?" Kuwabara asked from behind Leaky Faucet, sword against his throat.

"This isn't it." Hiei ground out. "I'm sure we're no where near Kurama."

"But, you can get to him through here. Sort of." Pyro twisted his head around to glare at Yusuke. "Now, I've done what you needed. If you could please take your gun from between my shoulder blades I'd be appreciative."

"Uh-huh. Sure. When we see Kurama."

"Alright. Through this door." Hiei shot a look at Pyro before kicking the door opened. A heavily-satined room stood before them, complete with red-lined bed, eighteenth-century style, a huge red-wood dresser, chair, card table, all exquisitely carved. The detectives stared.

"I'm not going in there. You know what that looks like? I'm not going in there…" Yusuke rambled on under his breath as Pyro looked at it lovingly.

"This is my master's sleeping quarters. We're hardly ever allowed to see it." There was a thunk as Yusuke hit the ground.

"You're using the fight between them to go and spy on your master?!"

"NO! No, that's not it at all! There's a way to find them in here!" Pyro turned quickly and dashed into the center of the room before spinning around. "I know it's here some--- Here!" He leapt up to a shelf and grabbed a large, satin-wrapped articled on his way down. "Here we go!"

"And what is…that?" Yusuke blinked down in surprise at the small black disk. Pyro and Leaky Faucet smirked at each other. Pyro flipped a switch at one end and the top half shot up, revealing a double-mirror, one on either side of the top. Yusuke gasped.

"It's a compact-thing! Karasu's really a girl!" Four bodies hit the ground at high speeds, feet sticking up in the air.

Kurama's feet skidded against the ground until his heels hit the wall. A snarl transformed his human face, bearing down on his demon edge. Another explosion sounded to his right, but he didn't feel that one-it was just an accident. Karasu stepped up, shadows masking his grin that came with the customary laughter. One of the smaller explosive demons aimed for the human's head. Kurama's defense was nothing more than a rose. Kuronue was silent during the exchange.

"Well, you're full of life today. More so than when last I saw you, even." Karasu's snide remarks bounced around the chamber, distorted and almost full of rage by the time they faded from hearing range. Kurama grit his teeth. "You know this would be more fun if you played along; maybe a few comebacks? A reply other than that gorgeous glare of yours? Possibly even a conversation of your own would be a change of pace." Kurama's voice did not sound. Karasu snorted. "Pretty face, but useless in conversation. At least Kuronue talks to me. He's not got your red locks or fall of silver, but conversation's good." Kurama was busily tuning him out. Another sigh from the playful demon.

A clasp sounded and cold metal fell away from a pale face.

"There! No, that's someone's television. Next room… There! That's them!" Pyro cried.

"No. That's a bed and those two are… " Yusuke cursed suddenly. "Can't people get a room nowadays?!"
"Oh, those two? Renters."

"I wouldn't expect that Karasu needed that sort of cash."

"He doesn't, but we do. We caused a lot of property damage before we got our powers under control."

"Sounds like Karasu alright."

Gold skittered across the stonework. A snarl ellicited from the dark-eyed fox as he blocked the physical blow with his arm, red locks entwining with his lashes, eye lids, nose, and breath. A grunt and his back hit the wall with the force of the attack. An attack that was sure to continue. Slippery petals caught in the flesh of the crow, exploding on impact.

"Using my trick, Kurama? That's new, for sure."

Uncaringly, the fox darted forward, digging nails into his opponents arm and ripping small gashes even wider.

No blood. No blood. No blood.

Seeds in every gash, each a different variety, each so versital that Kurama was sure they'd grow. Even more of Karasu's green-yellow lighted energy burst from these wounds, spilling seedlings and seed parts upon the unfertile soil.

"Now, that DIDN'T work, did it?"

"There! I saw something!" Everyone was staring directly at Yusuke. "What?"

"Could you possibly be any louder with those impossible lungs of yours?" Hiei growled in almost-awe, the compact they were staring through completely forgotten."

"Sorry, but I DID—!"

"We ALL did, Yusuke. Really."

"Fine, but…"

"Here it is." Pyro grumbled, allowing the demons to stare down into the bowels of his master's castle, where the master and Kurama fought.

The surprise that goaded him into taking his next backwards steps was warrented in that his opponent had taken an unlikely turn; pulling a sword in combat wasn't heard of when dealing with Karasu. That, and Kurama hadn't seen where it had come from.

Karasu held the fox at arm's distance with the tempered steel, a thin slice of death's perfection. Snarling so that the vibrations in his voice drew his taught throat's skin against the blade, Kurama held the once-again open wound in his stomach. He needed a sword/slash/bomb proof stomach bib for combat, pastel child-adored cuteness and all.

"Now, things can get interesting." Karasu leaned in closer. "I was at your disposal. You held my life in your hands." A strand of quicksilver fell from the gold and marred the malicious glitter in his eyes. His own cheek pressed against the dull side of the blade. "I want to be on top again. I want to win. I want you to fall. I want to break that beautiful mind with a climax that it deserves, an attack that only it deserves." The snarling had stopped of its own accord, leaving Kurama feeling exposed, naked. He started it again, but even as he did he knew it sounded dreary and hopeless.

"Baring your fangs, fox? It's a little late. You should have started sooner." He drew his left hand back, the one not holding the blade that limited Kurama's movements. "You'll enjoy this."

"He's going to kill Kurama!" Kuwabara cried, then waited for a response. And waited. "Guys? That was your cue to disagree?" Yusuke shuddered. Then he turned to Pyro.

"Where's that room?"

"Directly below us, if I'm not mistaken… hey! What do you think your--?!" But Yusuke had already aimed at the ground and fired. A shudder, much like Yusuke's, passed through the building, and the floor sank in.

"How long will it take for me to delve into your heart, fox? Rip out all that is you, and leave all that isn't. How long?" Karasu's face was only inches away when Kurama jabbed a rose straight through his chin and into his skull. He just smiled.

"I appreciate the thought, Kurama, but your delivery's off."

The ceiling behind him fell into the room, crashing against the leftover walls.

"You have any idea how many floors there are to this place? We still haven't reached the right room!"

"Some rescuers…" Kuronue grumbled.

"Hey! There's someone here!" Leaky Faucet called. Karasu had pulled back, staring that the rest of the Spirit Detectives, allowing his sword to fall away from Kurama's throat. Kurama stared but aimed the chi streaming through his blood towards the rose petals and blooms in his hand. No more than a heart beat, and the flesh would be ripped to shreds. His petals fluttered and instant away from the golden curls when a pale hand shot up.

A boy, with fur-covered legs of a bull and the tail of a scorpion, dark-haired head crowned with black, thorny devil knives as thick as an ox's, and arms with black flesh, as sharp as a dentist's needle prepared and oiled for maximum fear from the pegasus and pink-covered world of a young patient, that jagged back and formed blades that rested mere inches from his elbo, stood before them.

The freezing eyes of this chimera were gold and dark, with the large pupils you find on a doberman pincher who chases his human prey without emotion, upon the settling dust.

"You know, we may be on the right level now," Hieie grumbled. "If you'd stop blowing up and pay attention."

Karasu's hand was still up, and Kurama had paused. The dust was finally beginning to settle, deep clouds of broken and shattered rock that were clumping together and falling towards the floor… and stopping . A few red forms of the clumps of rock were reforming behind the detectives that had just caught sight of the dark and misformed chimera.

The crack of a bull's tail was beaten in speed as the tail of the boy shot at Hiei, who was closest. Yusuke's eye's widened and he raised his hand to fire.

The forms in back became disembodied capes, deep red eye lights floating within their depths, and all three of them circled around into fabric balls with single strings standing stiffly from the top, where a little fire began to burn its way towards the fabricated shoere.

A bomb.

"Behind!" Kurama's frantic yell shot through the falling air, the fear of the chimera, the estranged gut feeling of being below ground; the Tentei turned just in time to watch the explosion.

The string burnt down to the sphere, which opened up so that there was a top and bottom hemisphere, the hellish flame shot from the center of this archangel incarnate and towards the detectives.

It twitched along his arm.

A deep brown root entwined Kurama's arm, and he could feel the trunk along his back. He was entraptured by the pale eternity that drew out before him, far past the root along his arm. He pulled it in, staring at the thick root, and then looking up at where the branches would be.

A deep, deep red sight met his eyes. Blood flowered from the branches as petals. Kurama stared in shock for a long moment until he finally noticed the leaves were blue, with red tips. Not totally red. The tree was the embodiment of a massacre, at least. He stood on his toes, staring. The leaves rustled. A pale hand of his own brushed the cool blue that ran through the spings over rocks, but also ran through the heart of these leaves. She was in him.

Suddenly she was there, with him. Her softest voice, used purely to sing the darkest times in the last ounce of darkness before dawn away for him, when he was little.

Kurama retrieved his hand.

There was a pause as he just stared, listening to a wind he couldn't feel rustling the tree, making voices of people who weren't with him anymore, or right now.

His mother.

Yusuke Urameshi, who was laughing at Kurama's plight.

Hiei, who was making another snide remark.

Kuwabara, who was devoting his love to Yukina again.

Kurama tilted his head, listening to more voices, more people he knew and had listened to countless times before.

But not one of them was here.

He placed a hand on the trunk. The wind stopped, the leaves stilling instantly this time, startling him. He could feel the roots, though. Some grew over his shoulder and into his soul by way of the chest, some grew deeply into the ground, others just spread across the flat of the expanse they were in.

One flower, blending in perfectly as its petals were the color of the leaves, was just above his head. He managed to brush it with his hand after a few jumps.

"Hey, Youko! You wanna try that again sometime?"

Kurama let his hand fall. It wasn't the first thing he had heard from Kuronue, and not the heartshattering cry that had rent his soul into dust just before Kuronue's death… it was why Kuronue mattered at all.

Youko Kurama had met many a demon, and there were a few his large ego would allow him to consider as an accomplish. Kuronue was not one of them.

Goofy, tiring, annoying and loud, Kuronue had almost flubbed his raid on the treasury that day. He had set off the alarms, dropped the priceless glass work that he had come for, failed to kill any of the guards, and lost his pendant and had to go back for it multiple times. Even after this display of novice behavior, he still had the gall to call after Youko and ask if he'd raid the treasury again tomorrow.

That was precisely the reason he'd agreed.

Kurama's eyes wandered the length of the tree.

"I want him back."

Fire snarled from the chimara demons of Karasu's creation. Yusuke, Hiei, Pyro, Leaky Faucet and Hiei were moving too slow to fight the flames. Karasu stood behind his chimera, extremely proud of himself.

Kuronue writhed in his shackles, staring at Kurama.

Kurama's eyes burned only with the hellish flames.

The tree vanished.
Water pierced the stone, ripping through the soot in white-water rapids as it collected between the flames and the people.

A large pentogram of a flower flower formed from the water, the huge petals' veins ran red with the caught flames. After a moment, the torrent of power calmed and the three capes sat upon the ground, soaking and unable to light up again. Slowly, Urameshi pushed himself off the ground where he had fallen on Kuwabara, and Hiei got his knees off the floor where he had slipped forward. Karasu turned from his creation.

Kuronue dared not blink.

Kurama stood, covered in three-point ivy of flowing fire and brimstone and the purest white river. His eyes narrowed, hand extended, feet sturdy.

This wasn't Youko's pose. This wasn't the deep irony of Youko's eyes. They had never shown a deeper flame than the bowels of hell that he had escaped from. As deep as, but never deeper.

Kurama lowered his arm, the ivy solidifying into true leaves and vines. His burning green eyes met Kuronue's.

"Kura…" Was all the captive could manage.

"Well! That was an extrodinary showing, Kurama! I do love the way you looked with your hair wet!" Karasu almost sang from across the table. Kurama sweatdropped and managed an uneasy smile. Those two, Leaky Faucet, Pyro, the four new chimeras, Yusuke, Kuwabara, Hiei and Kuronue all sat around an ebony tea table, eating what was left of Karasu's kitchen and enjoying the sunshine above ground. The Scorpio (as Karasu had so ingenously dubbed him) had not touched his food, and the three floating capes were doing their very best to find a way to pick up the scones. Everyone else was rather full.

"Yes! Well done, Kuram!" Koenma cried from next to Kura'. Yusuke and the others stared.Yusuke raised an eyebrow.

"Interesting how easily you pop up after the fighting when the food comes out."

"Yes, well… "Koenma coughed viscously. "I did have to come to congradulate you on your wonderful capture."

"Or, submission," Karasu grumbled. "You should know I turned myself in."

"Why didn't you do that in the first place?!" asked Kuwabara, rather calmly. He had only bounced out of his seat rather than flying across the food-laden table.

"Why do you think?" Hiei snapped. "Research? It's more fun that way?" He gets to play around more, AND see Kurama? He's always got the same lines."

"I was actually ready to kill Kurama, but now…" Karasu sat back and stroked his chin. "He's proved himself as a Ruling Class Demon. The second time I've witnessed it. They're said tgo be extrodinary to watch, but I was blind when I went through it."

"Ruling Class?" Leaky Faucet asked, scone hovering a few inches from his face, hand stopping in momentary curiosity. Scorpio continued to stare at the plate, unblinking. Pyro nodded even as his plate burst into flame.

"Yes! You never explained this to us, Karasu!"

"It's simply," Karasy was making a point to speak to everyone present, "how a demon reaches into his own soul and creates. That's my alchemy, and now Kurama's lants. It's always taken very extreme circumstances, and most don't live and tell. At least, no one save I speak of my changing." He nodded proudly as Pyro, Leaky Faucet, and Hiei nodded their consent. Kuwabara rolled his eyes.

"So, I—" Kurama stared.

"Reached into your sould, yes. It can be devastating, what you find in there."

"And you? What did you find?" Kurama slipped in, poker face up.

"You mean, behind the dreadul high school experiences, the bloodlust, the Kurama-lust, the obsession with sharp, shiny and pointy objects and things that go boom? Not much, I'm sure," Kuronue snarled. He sat whit his back to the tea time bunch, elbow on knee and chin in hand, sulking. "I get caught by your kind, get rescued by your kind. To heck wit escaping."

"And your kind can't rescue itself," noted Kurama dryly.

"Do you mind getting us adjascent jail cells?" Karasu asked, turning to Koenma. "I don't really know how much help Scorpio will need as he develops…"

"Develops…?" Koenma gulped out.

"Well, he IS more animal than humanoid. Like paper training for dogs? He'll need that for his powers. As for teething, his tail's going to cause trouble, you know. Not loss-of-favorite-loafers trouble," Karasu leaned over secretively, "more like even MORE paperwork trouble for those dear ogres of yours." Koenma paled.

"Yeah… well… you can have your own jail condo if you'll control him."

"Of course!" Koenma turned away with a sigh of relieve just missing Karasu's victory sign and Kurama's exasperated eye roll. Scorpio continued his intamite, unblinking study of his plate of scones, oblivious.

Yusuke's foot disappeared through the portal into the human world just ahead of Kurama, who's hand was already upon the rim. He stopped and looked back at Kuronue.

"Are you coming, Kuronue?"

Dark eyes shifted up to meet his through a mass of bangs. A nimble hand adjusted the dark and frayed remains of his signature hat as he surveyed the demon world.

"I've missed running through those traps with the silver fox wonder, you know? You tend to miss people like him." He turned back, tuggin his had back down over his eyes and glinting red-gray eyes and a grin through the shadows.

"But I won't miss out on a new person for memories of an old. You ever leave this human life of yours, I'll be waiting for you at the nearest art museum." And he was gone, with even less of a black shadow of movement than Hiei's. Kurama blinked, shrugged, and turned away before realizing his foot was stuck to the ground. Upon investigating the cause of why he was still stuck in demon world, he found a small joker card stuck in his shoe. He pulled it up and read off the back.

Eartly Art Museum, 2444 39th Dr., Tokyo, Ningenkai

I'll be there

Catch Me Kill Me Fight Me Kiss Me Aid Me, Kindred Soul

Dead if you're late

Kurama stared for a long moment before he recognized the calling.

The first two phrases were for the cops.

The second two were for all the female ninjas he ran into.

The third was completely new. Kindred Soul... He'd never heard Kuronue call anyone that.

Of course… He'd never seen Kuronue himself in this life.

Kurama smiled and drew a red marker from his pocket.

Eartly Art Museum, 2444 39th Dr., Tokyo, Ningenkai

I'll be there

Catch Me Kill Me Fight Me Kiss Me Aid Me, Kindred Soul

Dead if you're late You're Dead If You're Not