Chapter 8
Amy frowned as she rummaged through her purse in search of the card for the hotel room. She was down the hallway towards her hotel room and she didn't know if Trish was back from her date yet.
"Where the fuck...oomph." She looked up in surprise when she realized that Chris had just bumped into her. "Chris? Hey...are you okay." She yelled out when he merely steadied her and walked pass her without saying a word. He turned around, his face pale and haggard looking. He nodded silently then walked quickly away.
She rushed towards the door to her room and knocked on the door.
"Chris?" Trish said concernedly, "Oh hey Aims." She said distractedly when she realized who was outside.
"Was Chris just here?" Amy frowned slightly, Trish looked troubled as she stepped away from the door to let Amy in.
"Yeah...he...oh my God Amy." Trish said helplessly. "He was so upset, and I didn't know what to do and he wouldn't let me talk he just...God! The expression on his face just broke my heart."
"What are you talking about Trish? Calm down." Amy rushed out as her friend began pacing the room.
"He was just...well okay. I got home from my date and I asked him to come here cause I wanted to talk to him about his ex-girlfriend...and he just, poor thing, he's so in love with this girl. It just...it kills me to know that he's so sad. He's such a good guy and this heinous woman is breaking his heart."
Amy's mouth dropped open. Holy shit. She thought to herself, as the story Trish was telling her along with the knowledge of Chris's feelings formed in her mind. "Trish," Amy began calmly, "Tell me exactly what he said."
"Well...I asked him to talk about her and we were listening to one of my Sarah McLachlan cd's. He said her name was Jessica...you know the ex- girlfriend. And anyways, he heard a song from the c.d. and all of a sudden he just kind of let it all out. He was saying that he didn't know how to let her go and that she completed him and how he knows that she's with someone else but he loved her so much that he was willing to stand by and let her be with another guy because it made her happy."
"Oh my god..." Amy whispered as Trish continued to talk. She knew then that Chris was talking about Trish. Knew that it was probably hurting him to even be around Trish. She stared at her friend as Trish continued to talk about all of the feelings Chris had revealed. She felt a strong desire to shake Trish and to tell her that Chris was really talking about her. But she knew that she couldn't.
"Ummm...Trish." Amy interrupted. Trish looked back at her distractedly. "I'm sorry hun, I have to make a phone call."
"Oh...ok." Trish said confusedly. "Go ahead."
"Right...I'll be right back." Amy said as she ran out of the room and ran down the hallway.
"Adam?" She said when he finally picked up.
"Huh? What?" Adam mumbled his voice deep with sleep.
"You have to go find Chris. He just told Trish everything...except he said he felt the way he did about some ex-girlfriend. I just saw him and god he looked like a mess. Please check on him." Amy pleaded worriedly.
"Fuck. Are you serious? Thanks Aims." Adam said quickly and she heard the rustle of sheets before Adam hung up the phone.
Amy turned around and walked back to the room with Trish and was surprised when as she reached for the door, it opened and practically bumped into Trish who had changed and was currently wearing her glasses, a sweats and flip flops. Trish immediately tried to get around her but Amy was quick to grab her arm.
"Whoa hold up, where are you going?" Amy asked anxiously.
"Look...I can't just sit here and go to bed. I have to find Chris. He's real upset right now and I feel awful for making him think about that horrible wretched woman. He needs a friend." Trish explained as she attempted to pull her arm away from Trish.
"I don't think you should do that Trish." Amy said wryly. "He just needs to be alone."
"What? No he doesn't. This was a probably a cry for help. You know...why else would he tell me all this stuff? He obviously wanted me to know and make him feel better. He was just overwhelmed." Trish said frowning at Amy when she still refused to let her go.
"No Trish. Seriously, I just called Adam; he's going to look for him. He'll be fine. Besides...umm..." Amy grimaced as she tried to think of another reason why Trish shouldn't go to Chris, "oh! And he probably doesn't want to be around women right now. It'll be better if he has another guy to talk to."
"Adam? Come on, I know Chris and I really think that..."
"No Trish, just go to bed and forget about it. He's not ready to talk to you right now. Chris will come back to you when he's good and ready...I mean" Amy swallowed nervously when she realized what she had said.
Trish leaned back and looked at her questioningly. "What do you mean by that?"
"What are you talking about Trish?" Amy said awkwardly walking back into the room and away from her friend.
"What you just said. That Chris'll come back to me? When he's good and ready? What do you mean? Where is he going?" Trish followed Amy as she walked around the to her bed, putting distance between the two of them.
Amy shook her head, "I meant he'll come back to TALK to you when he's good and ready."
"Why won't you look at me? Are you hiding something from me? And why won't you let me talk to him? Is there something going on here that I don't know about?" Trish couldn't help but notice the way that Amy fidgeted and looked all around the room awkwardly, doing everything possible avoid Trish's eyes.
"Amy! What the hell is going on??" Trish yelled frustratedly.
Meanwhile:
Adam walked quickly to Chris's room. He tried to rub the sleep out of his eyes as he looked at the descending numbers on the doorways. He couldn't believe what Amy had just told him. Did Chris really expose himself in such a way to Trish?
He knocked on the doorway, but there was no answer. He tried the door but it was locked. He ran his fingers through his hair aggravatingly when he realized that he had probably gone somewhere else. The lobby! Maybe they saw him walk through! He quickly turned around and ran down to the elevator.
"Excuse me!" He said urgently as the concierge who had been dozing off in the front desk stood up in surprise.
"OH sorry sir. Umm...How may I help you?" The man said awkwardly, bright red color climbing his cheeks.
"Shit! How long have you been sleeping? Forget it..." Adam said waving off the man's explanation for his errant behavior, "Have you seen a blonde dude, about 6 foot, long hair, one of the wrestlers?"
"Ah...no sir. I'm sorry."
"Shit!" Adam muttered through his teeth. There was no way of knowing where Chris could be now. He could be down the street at any of the random bars by now. Adam slowly walked back to the elevator but paused when he heard the ending notes of November Rain by Guns and Roses emanating from the Hotel Bar in the corner of the lobby. He shook his head, started walking again but then heard the familiar first notes of the White Snake song, "Here I Go Again On My Own" that Chris had so often forced him to listen to in the drives to Florida.
He couldn't help but smile wryly as he turned and began to walk towards the bar. November Rain and Here I Go Again On My Own? It was like a soundtrack of Chris' life. He signed when he saw his friends' familiar profile as he sat with his head in one hand and a beer in the other in the corner of the nearly empty room. He was seated close to the jukebox and in front of him was a small stack of quarters.
Chris didn't look up when Adam walked over to him. He sighed and simply said, "Amy?"
"Yeah she called me." Adam said honestly, sitting down next to Chris. He motioned for another beer at the waitress then waited for Chris to continue talking.
"How did you know I was here?" Chris asked quietly as tapped his fingers to the beat of the music.
"Well I went to your room and you weren't there. Then I came down here and heard November Rain followed closely by your favorite song ever in life and figured...who else would be listening to that depressing shit? And the answer to that was you my friend." Adam nodded at the waitress as she placed the beer in front of him. He watched his friend carefully in silence, willing him to talk.
Chris shrugged. As the song ended he dropped another quarter in the slot and pressed a couple of buttons, Adam looked at the old Juke Box and read the title, "When I Look Into Your Eyes" by Firehouse.
Adam sighed resignedly. This was going to be harder than he'd realize. Chris was now playing with the quarters on the table still resolutely avoiding looking at him. Minutes passed and they sat quietly listening to the lyrics of the song Chris had played.
I see forever when I look in your eyes
You're all I ever wanted
I always want you to be mine
Let's make a promise till the end of time
We'll always be together
And our love will never die
So here we are face to face
And heart to heart
I want you to know we will
Never be apart
Now I believe that wishes can come true
Cause I see my whole world
I see only you
When I look into your eyes
I can see how much I love you
And it makes me realize
When I look into your eyes
I see all my dreams come true
When I look into your eyes
I've looked for you all of my life
Now that I've found you
We will never say goodbye
I can't stop this feeling
There's nothing I can do
'Cause I see everything when I look at you
As the last notes of the song faded away, Chris leaned forward to once again pick up a quarter but Adam blocked his hand, quickly grabbing the remaining quarters and pocketing them. Chris raised his eyebrows questioningly.
"Come on Chris. Talk to me." Adam said worriedly. "I'm not going to let you listen to anymore of this crap music until you do."
"Fuck off Adam all right. Just leave me alone." Chris said throwing a couple of bills on the table as he rose swiftly.
"Hold up hold up. Here all right. Here are your quarters. Go ahead plan another one of your "I want to commit suicide songs", but stay down here and talk to me man. Look, I'm sorry I slipped and told Amy but honestly I was only thinking of you. I was just trying to figure out how deep this thing with Jeff really goes." Adam rushed out before he could leave the bar.
Chris ran his fingers through his hair and looked at his friend tiredly. He shook his head and sighed, grabbed a quarter from the table and deposited it in the slot, this time choosing "Don't Cry" by Guns and Roses.
"Well..." He began, "What did Amy say?"
"It's deep. She likes him a lot." Adam said seriously.
"Yeah well, nothing I didn't know before." Chris responded dejectedly leaning back against the back of the booth.
"But Chris, she likes you too. Honestly, I think he just beat you to the punch. She likes both of you." Adam sighed wearily. Chris shrugged at that and raised his hand up in the air to order another beer.
"What happened tonight?"
"What do you mean?"
"Amy said she saw you leave their room looking all peaked and what not. Said something about you telling Trish, but that you lied and said it was about some ex-girlfriend." Adam explained with concern etched in his face.
"She's got it right. This morning ya know, how I cut my hand and shit...well she was asking me why I did it and I couldn't of anything to say. So I lied and told her I was pissed off at my ex. She totally believed me and was asking me about her tonight. I was listening to some song she was playing and it was like all my thoughts put into music. I just exploded and told her everything. Only problem is...now she thinks I'm head over heels in love with my damn ex-girlfriend. It's pathetic." Chris finished, he took a long swig of beer and swiped the moisture from his lips. "Fuck! I want to tell her so damn badly, but I can't man."
"Chris...what are you going to do?"
"I have no fucking idea. All I know is...I have to stay away from her. This isn't right...what I'm doing I mean. I can't keep lying to her and there sure as hell is no way I can tell her the truth." Chris paused then suddenly raised his head and stared pointedly at Adam. "What would you do? If you were me?"
Adam thought quietly for a moment then heaved a sigh of misery.
"I don't know. I...I guess I would...I'd...I'd be where you are right now." He finally said.
"I can't keep doing this." Chris shut his eyes, "It's fucking killing me...and it's only been their first date. What am I going to do the next time they go out? Or if they fucking start making out with each other in front of me? I can't do it man."
Adam stared at his friend sadly and shook his head. There was no way this was going to end well.
Unbeknownst to either of them, someone was sitting a few booths away from them, his most prominent feature covered with a dark hat. He shook his head. He knew that only he could fix this...but it would mean giving up the one source of happiness that he had found in his life.
*** so...who wants to kill me? Don't worry...more to come soon if you review...REVIEWS GET ME THROUGH MY DAY KIDS...THEY SERIOUSLY DO! So make me happy...and I'll try my damndest to make you happy! ;-)
Amy frowned as she rummaged through her purse in search of the card for the hotel room. She was down the hallway towards her hotel room and she didn't know if Trish was back from her date yet.
"Where the fuck...oomph." She looked up in surprise when she realized that Chris had just bumped into her. "Chris? Hey...are you okay." She yelled out when he merely steadied her and walked pass her without saying a word. He turned around, his face pale and haggard looking. He nodded silently then walked quickly away.
She rushed towards the door to her room and knocked on the door.
"Chris?" Trish said concernedly, "Oh hey Aims." She said distractedly when she realized who was outside.
"Was Chris just here?" Amy frowned slightly, Trish looked troubled as she stepped away from the door to let Amy in.
"Yeah...he...oh my God Amy." Trish said helplessly. "He was so upset, and I didn't know what to do and he wouldn't let me talk he just...God! The expression on his face just broke my heart."
"What are you talking about Trish? Calm down." Amy rushed out as her friend began pacing the room.
"He was just...well okay. I got home from my date and I asked him to come here cause I wanted to talk to him about his ex-girlfriend...and he just, poor thing, he's so in love with this girl. It just...it kills me to know that he's so sad. He's such a good guy and this heinous woman is breaking his heart."
Amy's mouth dropped open. Holy shit. She thought to herself, as the story Trish was telling her along with the knowledge of Chris's feelings formed in her mind. "Trish," Amy began calmly, "Tell me exactly what he said."
"Well...I asked him to talk about her and we were listening to one of my Sarah McLachlan cd's. He said her name was Jessica...you know the ex- girlfriend. And anyways, he heard a song from the c.d. and all of a sudden he just kind of let it all out. He was saying that he didn't know how to let her go and that she completed him and how he knows that she's with someone else but he loved her so much that he was willing to stand by and let her be with another guy because it made her happy."
"Oh my god..." Amy whispered as Trish continued to talk. She knew then that Chris was talking about Trish. Knew that it was probably hurting him to even be around Trish. She stared at her friend as Trish continued to talk about all of the feelings Chris had revealed. She felt a strong desire to shake Trish and to tell her that Chris was really talking about her. But she knew that she couldn't.
"Ummm...Trish." Amy interrupted. Trish looked back at her distractedly. "I'm sorry hun, I have to make a phone call."
"Oh...ok." Trish said confusedly. "Go ahead."
"Right...I'll be right back." Amy said as she ran out of the room and ran down the hallway.
"Adam?" She said when he finally picked up.
"Huh? What?" Adam mumbled his voice deep with sleep.
"You have to go find Chris. He just told Trish everything...except he said he felt the way he did about some ex-girlfriend. I just saw him and god he looked like a mess. Please check on him." Amy pleaded worriedly.
"Fuck. Are you serious? Thanks Aims." Adam said quickly and she heard the rustle of sheets before Adam hung up the phone.
Amy turned around and walked back to the room with Trish and was surprised when as she reached for the door, it opened and practically bumped into Trish who had changed and was currently wearing her glasses, a sweats and flip flops. Trish immediately tried to get around her but Amy was quick to grab her arm.
"Whoa hold up, where are you going?" Amy asked anxiously.
"Look...I can't just sit here and go to bed. I have to find Chris. He's real upset right now and I feel awful for making him think about that horrible wretched woman. He needs a friend." Trish explained as she attempted to pull her arm away from Trish.
"I don't think you should do that Trish." Amy said wryly. "He just needs to be alone."
"What? No he doesn't. This was a probably a cry for help. You know...why else would he tell me all this stuff? He obviously wanted me to know and make him feel better. He was just overwhelmed." Trish said frowning at Amy when she still refused to let her go.
"No Trish. Seriously, I just called Adam; he's going to look for him. He'll be fine. Besides...umm..." Amy grimaced as she tried to think of another reason why Trish shouldn't go to Chris, "oh! And he probably doesn't want to be around women right now. It'll be better if he has another guy to talk to."
"Adam? Come on, I know Chris and I really think that..."
"No Trish, just go to bed and forget about it. He's not ready to talk to you right now. Chris will come back to you when he's good and ready...I mean" Amy swallowed nervously when she realized what she had said.
Trish leaned back and looked at her questioningly. "What do you mean by that?"
"What are you talking about Trish?" Amy said awkwardly walking back into the room and away from her friend.
"What you just said. That Chris'll come back to me? When he's good and ready? What do you mean? Where is he going?" Trish followed Amy as she walked around the to her bed, putting distance between the two of them.
Amy shook her head, "I meant he'll come back to TALK to you when he's good and ready."
"Why won't you look at me? Are you hiding something from me? And why won't you let me talk to him? Is there something going on here that I don't know about?" Trish couldn't help but notice the way that Amy fidgeted and looked all around the room awkwardly, doing everything possible avoid Trish's eyes.
"Amy! What the hell is going on??" Trish yelled frustratedly.
Meanwhile:
Adam walked quickly to Chris's room. He tried to rub the sleep out of his eyes as he looked at the descending numbers on the doorways. He couldn't believe what Amy had just told him. Did Chris really expose himself in such a way to Trish?
He knocked on the doorway, but there was no answer. He tried the door but it was locked. He ran his fingers through his hair aggravatingly when he realized that he had probably gone somewhere else. The lobby! Maybe they saw him walk through! He quickly turned around and ran down to the elevator.
"Excuse me!" He said urgently as the concierge who had been dozing off in the front desk stood up in surprise.
"OH sorry sir. Umm...How may I help you?" The man said awkwardly, bright red color climbing his cheeks.
"Shit! How long have you been sleeping? Forget it..." Adam said waving off the man's explanation for his errant behavior, "Have you seen a blonde dude, about 6 foot, long hair, one of the wrestlers?"
"Ah...no sir. I'm sorry."
"Shit!" Adam muttered through his teeth. There was no way of knowing where Chris could be now. He could be down the street at any of the random bars by now. Adam slowly walked back to the elevator but paused when he heard the ending notes of November Rain by Guns and Roses emanating from the Hotel Bar in the corner of the lobby. He shook his head, started walking again but then heard the familiar first notes of the White Snake song, "Here I Go Again On My Own" that Chris had so often forced him to listen to in the drives to Florida.
He couldn't help but smile wryly as he turned and began to walk towards the bar. November Rain and Here I Go Again On My Own? It was like a soundtrack of Chris' life. He signed when he saw his friends' familiar profile as he sat with his head in one hand and a beer in the other in the corner of the nearly empty room. He was seated close to the jukebox and in front of him was a small stack of quarters.
Chris didn't look up when Adam walked over to him. He sighed and simply said, "Amy?"
"Yeah she called me." Adam said honestly, sitting down next to Chris. He motioned for another beer at the waitress then waited for Chris to continue talking.
"How did you know I was here?" Chris asked quietly as tapped his fingers to the beat of the music.
"Well I went to your room and you weren't there. Then I came down here and heard November Rain followed closely by your favorite song ever in life and figured...who else would be listening to that depressing shit? And the answer to that was you my friend." Adam nodded at the waitress as she placed the beer in front of him. He watched his friend carefully in silence, willing him to talk.
Chris shrugged. As the song ended he dropped another quarter in the slot and pressed a couple of buttons, Adam looked at the old Juke Box and read the title, "When I Look Into Your Eyes" by Firehouse.
Adam sighed resignedly. This was going to be harder than he'd realize. Chris was now playing with the quarters on the table still resolutely avoiding looking at him. Minutes passed and they sat quietly listening to the lyrics of the song Chris had played.
I see forever when I look in your eyes
You're all I ever wanted
I always want you to be mine
Let's make a promise till the end of time
We'll always be together
And our love will never die
So here we are face to face
And heart to heart
I want you to know we will
Never be apart
Now I believe that wishes can come true
Cause I see my whole world
I see only you
When I look into your eyes
I can see how much I love you
And it makes me realize
When I look into your eyes
I see all my dreams come true
When I look into your eyes
I've looked for you all of my life
Now that I've found you
We will never say goodbye
I can't stop this feeling
There's nothing I can do
'Cause I see everything when I look at you
As the last notes of the song faded away, Chris leaned forward to once again pick up a quarter but Adam blocked his hand, quickly grabbing the remaining quarters and pocketing them. Chris raised his eyebrows questioningly.
"Come on Chris. Talk to me." Adam said worriedly. "I'm not going to let you listen to anymore of this crap music until you do."
"Fuck off Adam all right. Just leave me alone." Chris said throwing a couple of bills on the table as he rose swiftly.
"Hold up hold up. Here all right. Here are your quarters. Go ahead plan another one of your "I want to commit suicide songs", but stay down here and talk to me man. Look, I'm sorry I slipped and told Amy but honestly I was only thinking of you. I was just trying to figure out how deep this thing with Jeff really goes." Adam rushed out before he could leave the bar.
Chris ran his fingers through his hair and looked at his friend tiredly. He shook his head and sighed, grabbed a quarter from the table and deposited it in the slot, this time choosing "Don't Cry" by Guns and Roses.
"Well..." He began, "What did Amy say?"
"It's deep. She likes him a lot." Adam said seriously.
"Yeah well, nothing I didn't know before." Chris responded dejectedly leaning back against the back of the booth.
"But Chris, she likes you too. Honestly, I think he just beat you to the punch. She likes both of you." Adam sighed wearily. Chris shrugged at that and raised his hand up in the air to order another beer.
"What happened tonight?"
"What do you mean?"
"Amy said she saw you leave their room looking all peaked and what not. Said something about you telling Trish, but that you lied and said it was about some ex-girlfriend." Adam explained with concern etched in his face.
"She's got it right. This morning ya know, how I cut my hand and shit...well she was asking me why I did it and I couldn't of anything to say. So I lied and told her I was pissed off at my ex. She totally believed me and was asking me about her tonight. I was listening to some song she was playing and it was like all my thoughts put into music. I just exploded and told her everything. Only problem is...now she thinks I'm head over heels in love with my damn ex-girlfriend. It's pathetic." Chris finished, he took a long swig of beer and swiped the moisture from his lips. "Fuck! I want to tell her so damn badly, but I can't man."
"Chris...what are you going to do?"
"I have no fucking idea. All I know is...I have to stay away from her. This isn't right...what I'm doing I mean. I can't keep lying to her and there sure as hell is no way I can tell her the truth." Chris paused then suddenly raised his head and stared pointedly at Adam. "What would you do? If you were me?"
Adam thought quietly for a moment then heaved a sigh of misery.
"I don't know. I...I guess I would...I'd...I'd be where you are right now." He finally said.
"I can't keep doing this." Chris shut his eyes, "It's fucking killing me...and it's only been their first date. What am I going to do the next time they go out? Or if they fucking start making out with each other in front of me? I can't do it man."
Adam stared at his friend sadly and shook his head. There was no way this was going to end well.
Unbeknownst to either of them, someone was sitting a few booths away from them, his most prominent feature covered with a dark hat. He shook his head. He knew that only he could fix this...but it would mean giving up the one source of happiness that he had found in his life.
*** so...who wants to kill me? Don't worry...more to come soon if you review...REVIEWS GET ME THROUGH MY DAY KIDS...THEY SERIOUSLY DO! So make me happy...and I'll try my damndest to make you happy! ;-)