A/N: Oh dear. I had totally forgotten that I had put this story up on How sad. But someone had told me that I have not updated this since February. Shame on me. We should all throw moltav cocktails at me mercilessly. Oh, and before you read this chapter, please take note that I am in a Lord of the Rings fanatic craze stage. So this chapter will be quite crazy. Enjoy.

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Ron: Am I doing this right?

Dracochik: NONONO!!! THATS NOT HOW YOU FLING YOUR WEB!

Ron: When can I start climbing walls?

Dracochik: WHEN YOU FINALLY GET THE WEBFLINGING RIGHT!

Ron: STOP YELLING AT ME! THIS IS REALLY HARD!

Dracochik: I CANT TAKE THIS! I NEED ELIJAH! -sneaks into Elijah Wood's trailor-

Elijah: Come Billy, Dom, and Sean! We shall throw our hobbit feet at Viggo's head! CHARGE!!!

Dracochik: -steals the One Ring and puts it on- COOOOL! I CAN SEE THROUGH ELIJAH'S CLOTHES!!!!

Elijah: -gasp- Sean! Stop looking through my clothes!

Sean: I didnt say that!

Billy: -screeches- ITS A FAN GIRL!

Elijah: -draws out sting- WHERE?!?!?!?!

Dom: Shes using the power of the one ring!

Sean: I dont think its a fangirl! I think its Sauron back from the dead the haunt us!!!

Billy: But it sounded like a girl!

Elijah: Sauron's a girl? COOL!

Dracochik: I AM THE ALMIGHTY DRACOCHIK! BOW BEFORE ME!

Sean: AAAH! NOT HER!

Elijah: who??? Who is this Dracochik?!

Dom: I've gotten an owl from Harry Potter! He warned me about the almighty and evil author that tortures characters/actors!

Dracochik: I AM HERE TO TAKE MY HUSBAND!

Elijah: -phew- Shes probably just an Orlando fan.

Dracochik: I AM! BUT YOU ARE MY HUSBAND, ELIJAH WOOD!

Elijah: -screams like a little irish girl-

Dracochik: -takes off the ring-

Elijah: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

Billy: Shes kinda cute.

Dom: Can I keep her? -pokes dracochik's forehead-

Dracochik: -bites Dom's finger off-

Dom: AAAAAH! MOMMY!!!

Dracochik: -kidnaps Elijah while Sean and Billy look at Dom's finger- HES MINE NOW!! HEHEHE.

Elijah: SOMEONE HELP ME!!! -faints-

Harry: uum...are you sure this is ok?

Dracochik: of course it is! He ran away from me once, hes not running away from me again!

Ron: Elijah ran away from you before? what?

Dracochik: UUUUUH...nevermind about that. Now on with your training, Ron!

Ron: NO! IM SICK OF TRAINING TO BE SPIDERMAN! IM NOT SPIDERMAN! I QUIT THIS CHARADE!

Harry: YEA!! WE GIVE UP! WE'RE GOING TO BE REBELS!

Dracochik: DO NOT ANGER ME! -thunder claps and lightening strikes-

Harry: NO WAY! WE LIKE BEING REBELIOUS!

Dracochik: -roars- YOU HAVE ANGERED ME!

-Harry and Ron scream-

-Everything blacks out-

Scene: Elijah is in a pitch black room with voices...

Elijah: AAAAAAAH! HELP ME!!! IM AFRAID OF THE DARK!!! DRACOCHIK, HAVE MERCY!!!

Voice: #1 Shut up! We've only been here for 4 minutes!

Elijah: WE'RE GONNA DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIE!!!!!!!!!

Voice #2: You're makin my scar hurt! Ouchie!

Elijah: The walls are closing in on me!!! The voices in my head are angry!

Voice #1: What voices in your head?

Elijah: I think I lost my hobbit feet!!! -wails-

Voice #2: No, they're right here.

Elijah: WHERE???

-lights flick on-

(Voice #1 and #2 turn out to be Ron and Harry)

Elijah: I found my hobbit feet! REJOICE!!! -hugs hobbit feet-

Harry: We're in Arwen's bedroom!!!

Ron: COOOOOOOOL! WHERES HER UNDERWEAR DRAWER???

Harry: Over here! -opens drawer-

Dracochik: -pops out of drawer-

Harry, Ron, and Elijah: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Dracochik: -is in Galadriel's clothes- I AM THE NEW LADY OF LIGHT!

Elijah: Wheres the real Galadriel??

Dracochik: Well...she...um..sorta..FELL...

Ron: Fell?

Dracochik: ANYWAY...I was thinking...Ron, you're really scared of spiders...and we need to get ride of that problem if you're gonna be spiderman!!

Ron: How are we getting rid of my fear?

Dracochik: A little trip to Shelob's lair might do it...

Ron: NOOO! HAVE MERCY!!! ITS LIKE SEEING ARAGOG ALL OVER AGAIN!

Arwen: Who are you people? And why are you wearing my underwear on your head?

Ron: Its so silky and soft...-takes underwear off his head- can i keep it?

Arwen: NO! -snatches her underwear away from him- Who are you all??

Elijah: Its me!! Frodo!!

Arwen: Are you kidding me? Frodo is having tea with my father and a band of old ladies with curlers in their hair at the moment, so you cant possibly be Frodo.

Elijah: BELIEVE ME!!!

Arwen: GUARDS!

Dracochik: Wait! I am your grandmother! The Lady of Light!

Arwen: Oh Grandmother Galadriel!

Dracochik: Yes! I am the lady of light!

Harry: No you're not! Arwen, shes not the real Galadriel!

Dracochik: MR. POTTER, YOU'RE ANGERING ME...

Ron: Dude, if we anger her again, we might wake up in Eowyn's bedroom instead!!

Dracochik: -hits them over the head with a big bottle of roboutessin-

Harry and Ron: -wail in pain-

Elijah: I'M TELLIN YOU! IM FRODO! AND THATS NOT GALADRIEL!

Arwen: Theres only one way to find out...we must see my father!

(They all walk downstairs and into Elrond's fancy office)

Elrond: -is wearing an Agent Smith costume- Ah! Mr. Anderson, just the man I wanted to kill...I mean SEE!

Arwen: Father?

Elrond: Oh my God! Excuse me for a moment! -jumps under desk and pops back up with his regular elf clothes on- What is troubling you my dear Arwen?

Arwen: I found these people in my room, and one of them is my grandmother, Galadriel!

Elrond: Galadriel? Long time no see!

Dracochik: Yes! I am the Lady of Light!

Elrond: Yes...I know that already.

Elijah: IT'S ME, FRODO!!! FRODO BAGGINS FROM THE SHIRE!!!!

Elrond: What are you talking about? Frodo is just in the other room having tea with old ladies wearing curlers in their hair.

Arwen: I knew it! But father, why arent you with them?

Elrond: I was just about to join them! Come!

-They all walk into the dining room to see Frodo dancing on the table waving a pint around.-

Elijah: Oh my God! Thats me!!!

Frodo: He was a skater boy! She said see ya later boy! He wasnt good enough for her!!!

Elijah: Nevermind...thats not me.

Elrond: Old ladies, I must ask you to leave. A very important meeting is about to take place.

Old ladies: But we wanna see Legolas!!!

Dracochik: -glares- LEGOLAS IS MINE!

Arwen: But grandmother, you are already happily married to my grandfather, Celeborn!

Dracochik: Oh...him? Well he sorta FELL...

Arwen: Fell?

Dracochik: ANYWAY...dear Elrond, you do believe that I am the Lady of Light, Galadriel, right?

Elrond: We must go through a test!

Ron: I hope its major hard so they'll find out shes a phony so we can get out of here and we wont hafta do the whole spiderman story anymore.

Harry: Umm...yea! Ask her something hard!!

Elrond: Alright. Question #1! What are you? The Lady of Light, or the Lady of Darkness?

Dracochik: Oh! Oh! I know this one!! Its at the tip of my tongue!! uuuuh...The Lady of Light!!!

Elrond: Correct!

Elijah: This is bogus!

Frodo: Who are you? You look just like me!!!

Elijah: But we're not alike in any way, and we're keeping it that way.

Elrond: Question #2! Do you go to King's cross station, bumping into various walls to get through platform 9 3/4?

Dracochik: Yes! All the time!

Elrond I know right! Its so much fun.

Ron: What kind of questions are those?

Elrond: SILENCE! Final question...question #3! Do you hate dwarves?

Dracochik :DUH! They're disgusting!

Elrond: She is truly the Lady of Light!

Harry: WHAT??

Elrond: Only the true Galadriel could answer such questions! You three must stop this! You are burdening the Lady too much!

Ron: Fine. Whatever. We give up. Shes the lady of light.

Dracochik: You know it.

Elrond: Now...Frodo?

Frodo: NOW HES A SUPER STAR! SLAMMIN ON HIS GUITAR!

Elrond: Ok...We shall now go to my council...The Coucil of Elrond!

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YAY I UPDATED! WOOOHHH!!! lol. Hope you all like it. i already have the next chappy planned out too. So keep the reviews coming ya hear??