CHAPTER 27
A/N: Wow! Thanks for the great reviews guys! I just wanted to point something out:
A review I received told me that it's impossible for someone to overdose on Tylenol. Actually, that's far from the truth. You can in fact overdose on Tylenol, and if you do you're supposed to seek immediate medical attention. Many people use Tylenol and Advil to overdose. This is what happened to Maureen. Before I write things into my story that have any sort of medical background, I make sure that I check the facts to avoid any kind of errors.
You'll also find out in this and the next chapter that Maureen had taken something else besides Tylenol earlier in the day.
Other than that, enjoy this chapter guys!
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"I'm sorry to inform you of this, but we did everything we could…"
Mark dropped Jen's hand and studied the male doctor. "You mean—what? No! Is she?" He couldn't bring himself to say the words. Maureen was dead? What the hell had she taken in the first place?
The doctor sighed and shook his head. "No. We managed to get her stabilized and her heart rate steady. She's breathing on her own right now, although she hasn't woken up yet."
Mark nodded, relief flooding over his senses. "Then the baby—it's okay, right? The doctor didn't answer right away. "Right?"
"I'm sorry sir. We tried everything possible to prevent her from miscarrying, but nothing could be done. With her fall down the stairs in the beginning of the month, it was inevitable. I'm sorry."
Mark shook his head. "You can't do anything."
"I'm sorry sir. She miscarried shortly after she stabilized."
Jen sat up in Roger's bed and clutched her chest, breathing heavily. She pulled the sheets off her body and realized she was drenched in a cold, clammy sweat. It hadn't even been a full twelve hours and already she was having nightmares about what had happened to Maureen that previous afternoon. If the dream sequence kept playing over and over in her head, she couldn't imagine was Maureen and Mark were going through.
After the full labs came back earlier that evening, the doctors had concluded that Maureen had overdosed on a mixture of Tylenol, Vicodin, and some sort of prescription sleeping pills. Mark had been the only one who knew Maureen was taking the Tylenol to sleep better, but it was the Vicodin and sleeping pills baffled them all. Where had she gotten them from? No one knew the answer to that.
Jen pulled her hair out of the holder and shook it out as she walked into the living room. She walked down the hall and opened the door to Abby's room. Quietly, she entered the room and adjusted the blankets around the sleeping toddler. She and Roger had driven up to Scarsdale shortly after they had left the hospital to bring Abby back to the city from Roger's mother's house. Abby had fallen asleep early that night, around eight, and right after she had, Roger had taken the subway back to the hospital to be with Mark.
Jen glanced at the little clock positioned on Abby's nightstand and realized that it was already after 2 AM. She hoped that Roger came home soon, because she was starting to get a little worried that he hadn't called.
"Mom?" Abby had turned over and opened her eyes, still half asleep. "Where's Rog?"
"He'll be home soon. Go back to sleep for me, okay?"
Abby sat up and gave Jen a quick hug and kiss before turning back over. She closed her eyes and almost immediately fell back asleep. Jen stood up and walked out of the room, leaving the door open a little back. She heard Collins' and Logan's light snores from Mark's bedroom and knew they were no longer up either. After Roger had left for the hospital around nine, he had insisted that Collins and Logan stay with Jen so she wouldn't be alone in the apartment. Jen knew and admitted to him that she could take care of herself, but he wouldn't listen to her and still had the two of them come over.
So now Jen was left with nothing to do and no one to talk to. She was wide-awake and bored, which was never a good combination. This night reminded her of the many she would spend sitting up waiting with Mark for Roger to come home, and when he did, he'd often smell like beer, cheap perfume, and pot. Or he'd be completely drunk and high. As she sat down on the couch, Jen was instantly glad that those days were no longer.
She noticed that she had been sitting on that same couch, staring off into space ten minutes later when a key scraped in the lock of the loft door. The door creaked open and Roger walked in, carrying a brown deli bag.
"Hey. How are you? How's Abby?" He took off his leather jacket and immediately sat down on the couch next to her, placing the bag on the coffee table.
"I'm okay. Abby's asleep."
He nodded and pulled off his boots. "Why are you still up?"
"I couldn't sleep," she said honestly. "I just got up about ten minutes ago."
Roger looked at her worriedly and ran his fingers through her hair. "I'm sorry. I didn't think I'd be this late."
"Neither did I."
He looked over his shoulder at Mark's closed bedroom door. "Collins and Logan fell asleep?"
"Yeah. I don't know when. I was already asleep."
"So are they together then?"
Jen shrugged. "I'm not really sure. I didn't ask. What's in the brown bag?"
Roger opened it and handed her part of the sub sandwich. "I was starving so I got something to eat on the way home. I figured you were probably hungry too."
Good. A small part of her expected it to be a bag of heroin or something—else. "Thanks." She broke a little piece of the sandwich off and started eating it. "So, how's Maureen doing?"
"She still hasn't woken up yet or anything. The doctors said that maybe tomorrow morning at the earliest."
"How does she look?"
Roger shrugged. "Pretty bad. Whatever she took, she did a good job."
"Yeah." Jen placed the sandwich back on the table. "How's Mark?"
"He's fucked up Jen. I'm really worried about him. I tried to get him to come back here with me but he told me politely to fuck off and that he's staying the night there with her."
"So he's still feeling guilty?"
"Yeah."
She sighed and rested her head against the back of the couch. "I can't believe this all happened. If I never was there that night with Travis, Mark would have never ignored her and she never would have tried to kill herself. It's partially my fault."
"You never told me what happened that night. What Travis did to you--" he said slowly. "Do you want to talk about it?"
Jen looked at him and shook her head. "Not really."
"Are you planning on telling me at all?" Roger was already irritated by the sleep he desperately needed to catch up on, so the words flew out of his mouth with anger.
She stood up and walked into the kitchen, her bare feet stepping gracefully across the freezing tiled floor. "It's not just something I can fucking tell you and forget about."
Roger followed her and tossed the sandwiches and the bag into the garbage can. "I know. I just want to be able to help you, but I can't. You won't let me in."
Jen glanced at him sadly and walked towards him. "I'm sorry. Telling it to you would be like reliving it for me. Do you know how many times it's played through my head since it happened?"
"No." Roger wrapped his arms around her and kissed her temple. "I miss you."
"You mean you miss having sex with me."
Roger dropped his arms and walked away from her. "Whatever."
"Yeah." She grabbed a towel out of the closet and walked into the bathroom.
"Why do you always turn everything around on me? Like I'm some kind of guy that's looking for a quick fuck all the time?"
Jen turned around in the bathroom door and stared at him. "You want to know why? Because I'm afraid that if I don't have sex with you sooner or later you're going to leave me for someone else. Someone better, someone smarter, someone prettier. Someone who could give you what you want. Then you'd come home to me and Abby and pretend everything was still okay." She turned her back on him and closed the door.
Roger heard her turn on the shower and mentally kicked himself in the ass. Good job, shithead. He already pissed Mark off. Now he pissed his girlfriend off. Who was next?
He waited a few minutes before getting up off the couch and going into the bathroom. It was pretty steamy in there already, but he could make out the sound of Jen crying over the running water.
"Jen."
"Don't you take a hint that maybe I don't exactly want to talk to you right now?" She rinsed out the shampoo in her hair and wiped at her eyes.
"I didn't know you felt that way."
"Yeah." She reached down and turned off the faucets before wringing her hair out. "Can you hand me my towel?"
Roger picked up her towel off of the sink and tossed it over the shower door, grinning to himself. "There."
"Ass."
"I love you." When she didn't answer right away, he ran his fingers through his hair. "I'm sorry for being an inconsiderate jerk. Like I said before, I'm not about to push you into anything you're not ready for. I can wait for you. I told you this. And I would never leave you for someone else. I swear Jen. You have to believe me. I know what happened in the past, but I would never make the same mistakes twice. I'm sorry."
Jen stepped out of the shower, white towel wrapped around her body. "I'm being such a bitch to you lately."
Roger rested his hands on her shoulders as she brushed out her hair over the sink. "You're not. If anything I'm being a dick about the whole situation."
"So…do you want to try tomorrow? In the morning? When we get up?"
"Try what?"
She sighed and raised her eyebrows at him. "What do you think?"
"Oh." He laughed and hugged her gently around her waist. "Okay. If you're sure."
"You have what you need, right?"
"Yeah. The box is still sitting in my drawer."
Jen nodded and pulled her hair back. "Take a shower. You smell like the hospital."
"Okay. I'll meet you in the room in a few minutes."
She quickly walked into their bedroom and threw on a pair of his boxers and a long sleeved tee shirt of his. Within five minutes, Roger walked back into the room in a towel. He quickly changed and joined her underneath the sheets.
"Mmm you smell good." He inhaled the scent of the shampoo in her damp hair, pulling Jen on top of him.
"I'm so tired." She rested her head on his chest. "You're warm."
Roger kissed her and turned onto his side, gently sliding her off of him so he could wrap his arm around her stomach. "You're cold, so maybe I should warm you up?"
"Maybe," she smiled. Jen planted a few kisses along his jaw line and then finally on his mouth. "Night. Love you."
"Stop teasing," he laughed. "I love you too."
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Maureen opened her eyes slowly and moved her head to the side on the overstuffed pillow. She saw the monitors and heard the machines humming softly in the background. The lights in her hospital room had been dimmed to a comfortable setting, allowing her eyes to adjust almost immediately—wait, hospital room? She was a little confused at first, but then the reality of why she was here in the first place set in. Right Maureen, because you smartly overdosed on Tylenol, on an empty stomach, after taking two other types of pills earlier in the day. Perfect move. She winced slightly, lifting her hand slowly off the bed. Her head started pounding automatically, and dull waves of pain were settling in her stomach.
Maureen tilted her head to the other side and noticed Mark asleep in a chair, right next to her bed. She closed her eyes again briefly, regretting what she had done to him and to everyone. They all had to know by now. She wished she could take it all back, but she couldn't. She hadn't really wanted to die, did she? She just wanted the pain and the feeling of being alone all the time to go away. The last thing she remembered was wanting to sleep, and now she had ended up here?
She watched Mark stir in the chair and sighed awkwardly. What the hell was she supposed to say to him? But wait a minute, hadn't Mark told her that he never wanted anything to do with her or the baby again? Yes, he had. Then why was he here? Angrily, she watched the shocked expression form over his face. He moved the hospital chair closer to her bed.
"Hi."
She tried to speak, but the words wouldn't come out. She literally couldn't get the words out. They must have done something to prevent her from talking. "Marky," she managed to force out, raspily. God, she even sounded like hell. Maureen didn't even want to know what she looked like.
Mark didn't know what to say as he looked at her. She looked very tired and pale, but he was thankful that she was awake and talking to him again. "How do you feel?"
Maureen wasn't sure how to answer that question. She was feeling far from okay. "Sore. Not so good. Like I need a shower. Thirsty too."
"Okay." Mark smiled. He poured some water into a cup and handed it to her. "Um, the nurse left this here for when you woke up."
"Thanks." Maureen tried to prop herself up in the bed without letting the IV line get in the way of her drinking from the cup. The pain in her stomach was starting to sharpen and she rubbed her hand over it. No luck. If anything, it was now spreading to her lower back as well.
Mark noticed this, but said nothing. "So."
"I lost the baby, didn't I?"
"What do you think?"
Maureen glared at him as she tried to get comfortable once again. "Excuse me?"
"You did."
She nodded and felt her eyes well up with tears. She tried to sniff them back and saw Mark roll his eyes. "Stop it, Mark. Grow up. You're twenty-six fucking years old. Act like it."
"Me? Act like it? Can I ask you why you're even crying right now? You didn't want the baby. Don't cry over it and pretend like you gave a shit. You know you didn't. Stop overreacting."
"You're an asshole."
"Good."
Maureen closed her eyes and turned her back to him. She didn't need this right now. She wished Mark would just go away and leave her alone, by herself. If he was trying to make her feel worse about herself, it was working. "Can you please leave then?" A few silent minutes passed, and when she didn't hear his footsteps leaving the room, she repeated herself. "Mark. Leave the room now. Please." She didn't want to, but she started crying after she said that to him. Also because she was in a lot of pain.
Mark watched her lying in that bed, shoulders shaking. She was crying because of him. At that moment he felt incredibly guilty. He had said so many terrible things to her. Even know, he was still putting her down and being a real asshole towards her. What was wrong with him lately? He and Maureen were supposed to be starting over, and he wasn't being the greatest boyfriend, friend, whatever they were now. Instead of leaving, he walked over to the other side of the bed and sat down. Close enough for him to talk to her, but far enough in case she tried to hit him. Considering it was Maureen, he wouldn't put it past her.
"I'm—I don't know what to say, or how I should say it. I'm sorry."
Maureen looked at him for what seemed like a long minute, but then nodded at him. "I'm sorry too."
"Yeah." Mark looked down at the hospital blanket, where her hand was resting. "I shouldn't have said what I did to you yesterday. I lost my temper I guess, but Christ Maureen, when I saw that piece of paper I didn't know what to do. Where you honestly going to go through with it without telling me?"
She shrugged weakly. "I'm not sure. Probably not."
Mark shook his head. "Probably," he said angrily. "Why did you take all those pills? And where the hell did you get the Vicodin?"
"Don't worry about it," she said coldly. "You're so concerned with yourself anyway." Maureen glanced at him again and realized that his facial expressions had changed. "Are you crying?"
"No," he tried to avoid her eyes. "I'm just gonna leave."
"Marky…"
"Mark what? Do you know how scary that was Maureen? To see you fucking fighting for your life in there last night? Do you? Do you want to know how much Jen freaked out after she found you? Or how Roger sat outside the hospital smoking all night because he couldn't watch them try to save you like they tried to save April? Don't you get it? We all care about you! Even Roger! You almost died in there!"
"I'm sorry Mark," she cried. "I didn't think—I felt so alone. I'm sorry."
He sat back down on the bed and slid his hand through hers. "You're everything to me. You know that right?" He laid next to Maureen and she pressed her head into his chest.
"You mean that?" she wiped at her eyes and looked up at him. "But—"
"Let's not talk about that right now, okay? We'll talk about it later."
Maureen nodded. "Okay."
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