AN: Hey guys, I thought of this a long time ago, but never got to write it!! I hope you all enjoy this story!! It's one-shot, okay?? No more chapters after this!!
Mandi-Solo
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Recess.
Letter
Dear Claire,
I bet you might remember me as a friend, a savior, a mentor, or maybe a punk kid who always messed with the adults. Well, you'd be right. That's what I was, back in the day. Now, I'm older, and a freshman in high school. Hard to believe, isn't it? That I, TJ Detweiler, would ever pass elementary school, let alone Jr. high School. I could hardly believe it myself. But now that I'm actually in high school, being older and wiser, all those fun times I had as a kid all just seem like a dream I wish I could never wake up from. The gang is still the closest of friends. Now that we're older, we are even tighter than ever before. I always have my friends to back me up.
--
I walked down the halls of Prickly High School, my black backpack hanging loosely on my right shoulder. Other students, most familiar from Third Street Elementary, were walking past, saying "good morning," "what's up?" or just giving a wave of their hand as I walked past them. I replied back in the same way, a salute with two fingers and a wide grin.
Ah, my good friends were waiting for me by our new lockers. Vince was leaning against his locker, his football jacket on as a sign of how proud he was he made Jr. Varsity. Mikey was still big as he was back in elementary, he hadn't had a growth spurt in a few years. Some us of just thought that was so we could just catch up to him. Gretchen got contacts in the seventh grade, and she got hold of a fashion magazine by mistake when she was buying her normal Science Weekly. Not to say she wasn't fashionable, but now she looked even better. She had highlights, and didn't wear her socks in two different lengths.
Gus, good old Gus, was now bigger, and braver. His father sent him to a military academy every summer since fourth grade. After eighth grade, it really paid off for him. He was ripped! And then there's Spinelli. Or, that's what we used to call her. After the Ashley's spilt up in sixth grade, Spinelli took to her normal name, Ashley. Since then, that's what she made us call her, especially after she met her idol, who was also named Ashley. Now, Ashley (Spinelli) wasn't as tough as she used to be, but she still liked to pick fights every now and then.
I smiled and waved at them as I walked up, they waving back with grins on their faces. Gretchen was reading her magazine, trying to find out who it was who won the latest Nobel Prize, and probably checking for her own name. Vince was throwing around his football, and Ashley was chewing on a piece of gum while Mikey and Gus argued about the American Government.
"Hey guys!" I said, opening my locker to throw my backpack in and grab my first book for the day.
"Hey TJ," Ashley said, spitting her gum out in the trashcan next to her. "Why did you sign offline last night? I was in the middle of talking to you!"
I blushed, we always talked online at night, and it became a routine. She was the only one on my buddy list on at night, and I was the only one on hers as well. Everyone else had lives.
"Well?" She asked, folding her arms across her chest.
"I had to help my sis out, she's moving in a month with her new husband." I made up an excuse.
"Oh really?"
I nodded and turned my attention to taking my books out of my backpack, and trying not to drop anything as my hands shook.
"Hey TJ," Vince said, and I looked up, glad for a subject change. "You gonna come to the game tonight?"
"Sure, what time?"
"Right after school, we're playing Middle East High."
Oh, Middle East was the school's rivals. Vince always had me at a game against them, just to help calm his nerves down a bit.
"But TJ," Gretchen interrupted, "we were supposed to go to the museum to look at my recent inventions."
"I thought we were going to the movies?" Gus asked, and Mikey nodded.
I laughed nervously, knowing that Ashley was going to say we were supposed to go to the mall or something. "Sorry guys, but I can't do anything at all this weekend. I have to help out my sis, and I have to visit an old friend of mine."
"Claire?" Ashley asked, her voice rising in anger.
I blushed and looked at the ground. Ashley rolled her eyes and began to tap her foot. She wasn't even looking at me.
"Who's Claire?" Vince asked, a sudden lash of interest in his voice.
"T's girlfriend." Ashley said before I could say anything.
"NO!" I shouted even before her words were out of her mouth. They all looked at me, ready to explain, but I dared not speak a word. Ashley was jealous, and upset, Vince was interested, and the other guys had no clue what was going on.
"Go and tell them, T," Ashley said, probably wishing she had her gum to continue chewing on.
I slammed my locker shut, and took my book and walked away. No one called after me, no one followed me, they all new what to do when I was upset, or had stuff on my mind that I didn't want to say. Besides, I was late for my first class.
--
I never knew what I was getting myself into each time I played a prank, did something for the rights of all students, or just to goof off. If I had only known it would have landed me in the worst time of all, I would have stopped myself. If only I knew sooner, if only I could have been there to stop it, she might not have been injured. She might not have been so close to death, to the point of her life she never asked for or deserved. If I could have only been there.
--
It was later that night, the football game was on, and Vince was most likely freaking out, loosing his cool, or maybe even throwing up. I'm sure someone was there to help him out, but I had felt horrible that it wasn't me. Ashley didn't get online, and I didn't get any phone calls. They were mad at me, or still thought I was mad. Oh well, I should at least help my sister move.
She was packing some more of her things in her room and I decided to help her tape the boxes together. After about an hour of packing, taping and bringing the boxes downstairs and out to the moving van, we decided to order a pizza. I waited on the couch, watching some TV, and the sound of the phone woke me up from my light daze. Becky answered it, and I could hear her from the other room.
"Yes. What? When? Where did this happen? Is she okay? She wants to see him? Okay. Okay, I'll tell him. Thank you. Bye."
I frowned and sat up on the couch to see her walking into the room, looking down at the carpet, her hair falling over her face. I stood up, I had seen that look on her face before, and it meant something bad had happened.
"What is it?" I demanded, my voice quivering.
"Ashley..." she said weakly. "She was in a car accident."
My heart dropped. It grew harder to breathe, and I looked at my sister for any sign of a laugh, or a "got you!" Nothing, my sister was looking at me with worried eyes, and I'm sure I was looking back at her the same way.
"She wants to see you."
"Where is she?"
"I'll take you there."
--
If you could only know the feeling I received that night. It was a feeling of fear, hope, anger, sorrow, and so many other feelings at once. It felt as though my heart was twisting with each mile we drove that night. I will never forget the way she looked at me, the words she spoke to me, the fear I felt in my heart, the way I wished I could have stopped it all from happening. If you could only understand, Claire, you would know why I am writing this letter to you today.
--
I almost ran to her hospital room, Becky holding me back by my arms. I charged into her room, her parents sitting on the chairs by the window, their eyes looking at me like they were pleading for me to help her. I most likely looked the same way to them, and when I saw Ashley lying on the bed, her face pale, tubes running through her nose and in her arms, I felt my heart drop and I wished I could save her. It was all I could do not to cry.
I fell on the ground next to her bed, grabbing her small, cold hand in both of mine. Her eyes opened slowly, her scarred and patched up face looked down at me.
"TJ," she whispered slowly, coughing out some spit and a bit of blood.
"I'm here Ash," I said, rubbing her hand with one of my own. "You're going to be fine."
"T, I need to talk to you..."
"Talk away, I'm right here."
"Alone."
"Oh..." I looked at Becky and the Spinelli's. They nodded, but I knew they felt uncomfortable leaving her alone with me. They walked out, and closed the door behind them. I watched them go before turning my head back to Ashley's face, her brown eyes staring back at me.
"TJ, how long have we been friends?"
I smiled, "forever."
"Is that how long we are going to stay friends?"
"You bet."
Now her eyes drifted down to our hands. "T, promise you won't hate me."
"I could never hate you!"
"I jumped out in front of that car..."
My face grew hot, and I could just see the angry look on my face. "What? Why in the world would you do that? What were you thinking?" I was yelling, but she was sitting there, still staring at our hands.
After I had finished cursing, and yelling, I took a deep breath, and blushed. "I'm so sorry, Ash. I didn't meant to yell."
She shook her head, "you had every right to. I don't blame you. If you had jumped out in front of the car on purpose I would yell at you, too."
I laughed, that she would, and probably sock me.
She put her other hand on top of mine, and looked at my eyes. I gazed back at her, sitting there quietly, waiting to hear what she had to tell me.
"T, the reason I jumped out in front of that car, was because I was afraid I would loose you to Claire."
"Why would you think that?" I asked stupidly. I knew the answer; I was getting close to Claire, talking too much about her, always talking to her. It was like she was my girlfriend, just as Ashley told the guys.
"Don't play dumb, T. I know you liked her, and she liked you. I could tell every time you guys added me into your conversations online."
"Is that why you were so bitter towards her?"
"Yes, I was afraid that if you really moved to France like she suggested, I would never be able to see you, talk to you, or..." She sat up and wrapped her arms around my neck. "I would never be able to hold you in my arms just like this."
I was blushing, but I held her in my own arms in a reply to her. "I was never going to France, Ash. It's too far away from everyone, and I was afraid of leaving you, too."
--
Do you understand, Claire? Do you know why I have to end this? I know you like me, and I knew I liked you, too. But, moving to France would mean to leave Ashley, and I would be too afraid to do that, too ashamed of myself. I am sorry to let you know this way, but it was the only way I knew how. I hope we can still be friends and talk often. Often, not every night, if you could. Thank you so much for your time, Claire. I won't forget you, but it might be better if we did forget each other.
Sincerely,
TJ Detweiler
I sent the e-mail, and sighed, leaning back in my seat. The chat box that I was sharing with Ashley light up as she gave a reply.
"AshestoAshes: did you send the e-mail?"
"TJDoubleTrouble: yeah... hope she reads it."
"AshestoAshes: im sure she will."
I smiled to myself, and typed. "Love you, Ash."
She inserted a happy face and replied: "love you, too, T."