CHAPTER TWO!!! YEAH!!!

A/N: ThAnK yOu! tHaNk YoU vErY mUcH! You have no idea how long it took me to write that. It's hard typing in capitals and lower case. ENOUGH BLIBBLE!! On with the shtory (I meant to say shtory!)

Just then Dumbledoor came in the common room and hexed them all! "Praise be to the light! They were giving me a headache!" Albus exclaimed. He turned around to see none other than Fudge (big man in a high place)

"Albus I saw what you just did! You're horrible! Horrible! HORRIBLE!! Those poor children all they were doing was giving you a migrane that could make your head explode it hurt so much!" Fudge was ANGRY with a capital ANGRY!

"First of all FUDGE my real name is Ernie." Albus said slipping a $20 bill into Fudge's coat pocket. "And second of all...this never happened." Fudge nodded and vanished with a lick of his pimp cane.

"Dam! I wish I had one of those pimp canes to go with my hat!" Albus said jealously. Suddenly Profesor McGonagal dropped from the sky, fell through the cieling and landed in Dumbledoor's bony wrinkling weak arms. They both fell to the floor.

"OH ALBUS! I WAS CURSED!" McGonagal screamed. Thats when Dumbledoor noticed the large dil pickles coming out of her nose. "I was in Diagon alley when I -

"HOLY HELL MINERVA! I don't want to hear how you got a curse that's highly contagious while you are sitting right on top of me! REMOVE YOURSELF! By the way I don't really care and...IM NO FRICKEN DOCTER!!" Albus screamed in a fit of rage! (a/n: rage isnt that a nice word?)

McGonagal started crying and ran to the hospital wing. But the pickles up her nose were so big that she couldn't see and ran right into a wall knocking herslef out. Mr. Severus Snape was the next to enter the disaster area.

"Albus, since you are sitting and I am standing, I tower above you so I will speak to you as if I am much more important. I have a problem and you are going to be the one to solve it. This is a subject I havent talked to anyone about for years." Just then Albus stood up now towering above Snape. "I HAVE FAT LEGS!" he whimpered. "Please, please help me Albus I've tried diets but they are slow! I've tried lypo but I'm scared of docters."

"Have you tried magic?" he replied as if it was the most obvious solution in the history of the wizarding world!

"Oh my god! Albus you're a genius." Snape skipped out of the common room as happy as can be.

"That pickle curse Minerva has reminds me of Usher. Oooh he's hott! Mmm mm good!" Albus mumbled licking his lips. Suddenly Hermione woke up.

"Weeeeeeeeeeeeee that was fun! Oh my gosh! Everyone is asleep! I don't know what to do!! HELP! HELP! HELP! Oh wait...nevermind I've got this under controll. I forgot I'm the smartest in the school. DUH! I read books like all day and when I'm not I'm either studying, eating and studying, sleeping and dreaming about studying, in class, or taking a dump and studying. Oh who am I kidding! I have no self esteem! No body likes me! I smell like horseraddish, I never shower, I have warts because I lick toads! Waaaaaaaaaah!!" Hermione was crying now and everyone around her that was awake was laughing histerically at her misfortune.

KNOCK KNOCK.

"Helloooo in there!! We are in desperate need of an ending for this upidstay chapter you know! I mean you dont want your readers to get tired of reading a story that makes no sence do you?!" Draco was shouting at the beautifully talented author. " I'm actually here to anounce that I am the sexiest person alive and you should all bow before me."

"Draco! We've seen your website! If you haven't noticed you look like a 40 year old man." Someone yelled from the corner.

Right well Thats all for now I'm off READ THIS AND REVIEW IT!!