Chapter 6

Slowly Buffy trudged upstairs. She had just spent the whole day at the beach with Riley and she actually enjoyed herself. Every time she was going to tell him that she couldn't go through with the wedding he did something so sweet that she just couldn't break his heart. If she didn't do this though, she couldn't have a life with Angel, and that, more then anything, was what she wanted to do.

She hadn't spoken to Angel since the night they made love. She didn't know how too. She felt so guilty about keeping this secret from him. Angel would have never have even touched her if he had known about Riley. Hell, he wouldn't have touched her if there was even the slightest hint of a man in her life. If only she had listened to her conscience that night at the restaurant, if she had, she probably wouldn't be engaged to Riley right now. She just wished there was a way to do this that wouldn't hurt anyone but still allowed her to be with Angel.

Sitting down heavily on her bed she put her head in her hands on the verge of tears.

"Hey," a soft voice came from her window.

Buffy raised her head up and found Angel sitting on her window sill. Memories came rushing back at the sight of him there. He used to sneak into her room all the time. Those were the days when things were less complicated. She remembered how he'd sneak into her room in the middle of the night just so he could see her face before he went to bed. He told her that it kept the nightmares at bay. She loved how he would just sit and hold her hand all throughout the night if she had had a bad day, or feeling the threat of getting caught in one of their heated make out session when her mother was only a room away from them. How she wished she could go back to those days, the days of innocence.

"Hey," she answered finally.

He came the rest of the way into the room and sat at the edge of her bed next to her. "What have you been doing?"

"Nothing," she said, abruptly getting up from where she sat. She started pacing the room, the whole time Angel's eyes were following her.

"You okay?" he asked

"Fine, I'm just fine."

"You don't sound fine."

She stopped her pacing and spun around. Throwing her arms up into the air she started yelling, "Really, then how do I sound?" Angel just starred at her. "Come on Angel, tell me. Because I would really like to know what I'm feeling. I mean, everyone knows that I'm not capable of knowing how I feel, I have to have someone else tell me what to say and do! Who to date, who to marry, how I'm supposed to feel, those decisions aren't left up to me because we all know that poor little Buffy can't do that on her own!"

Angel nodded once and got up to leave.

It took a few seconds before Buffy realized what a bitch she had just been. For no reason she had lashed out on Angel. He had nothing to do with any of this. Well... he did, but it wasn't his fault that she was having this emotional turmoil between the man she loved and the man she was supposed to marry. Buffy sighed and shook her head, quickly she ran over to him and grabbed his arm, preventing him from leaving. "I'm sorry. I'm just a little upset right now. It's not you."

He looked at her, concern etched all over her features. "Then what is it? I haven't seen or heard from you since...."

"I know, I just... I'm confused right now. Not about that night though." She added quickly "I love you. You know that."

"I love you too. That's why I'm worried. Buffy, what's going on?"

"I told you, I'm just upset right now."

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked, his hands roaming over her shoulders.

"No, I just want you." She looked up at him with all her pain and confusion.

Slowly, Angel bent down, his lips locking with hers. There tongues dueling in an endless battle, while their hands roamed the others bodies, removing clothing, just trying desperately to be near one another. Buffy clung to him not wanting to let go. She hated being so confused, but when she was in his arms, everything was right. The way he touched her, the way he made her feel, she couldn't understand how she had spent five years without him.

Grabbing her by the hips Angel led her to the bed, determined to help her forget what ever she was feeling.

Buffy woke up once again, wrapped in Angel's arms. 'I could get used to this.' She thought happily. Last night was spent kissing, both giving in once again to their passion. Looking over at her clock the time told her it was 5:30. They had slept the whole day away and the sun had already set on them.

The phone next to her started ringing. Quickly she reached across Angel and snatched it off the hook.

"Hello." She whispered

"Morning sweetheart."

"Riley?" 'Oh shit!' her mind screamed. 'Not Riley, anyone but Riley.'

"Of course it's me silly, who else? Listen, I'm about a block away from your house. I figured I'd stop by and we can go do something."

"NO!" Buffy yelled causing Angel to stir. "You can't do that." She added more quietly

"Why not?" Riley asked offended.

"Because, I um..."

"Buffy? Who are you talking to?" Angel mumbled, whipping sleep from his eyes.

"Who is that?" Riley shot back on the other end of the phone.

"No one." She said to both men.

"Well, it must be someone, I heard a voice." Riley was starting to get mad. Buffy had been acting really weird lately and now he calls her to find out the she has someone who sounded an awful lot like a male there with her!

"It's nothing." She said, trying to calm Riley down. Angel was looking at her with confusion. 'Who was she talking too?'

"No one, huh?" Riley asked, entering her bedroom, clicking off his phone.