The Gryffindors had already started trying to turn baseball caps into soup bowls be the time Minerva reached her classroom. "Sorry I'm late, students…I see you've already started. She sat down at her desk and started scanning the room. Her eyes settled on Neville first.
"Neville, are you having any difficulties?"
"No, Professor. I've been doing much better since Hermione started tutoring me…in the astronomy tower…in the middle of the night…"
"I don't want to know what you're insinuating, Neville." Hermione suddenly started sobbing.
"Hermione, what's wrong?"
"I…I…Draco Malfoy RAPED me!"
"Well….um…I thought…"
"But it doesn't matter, since he was so tender. Sigh…"
"Are you saying that you enjoyed being raped by Mr. Malfoy?"
"I…uh…"
"It's all right, Hermione."
"Maybe Professor Snape could help me work through my conflicted feelings…in the dungeons…in the middle of the night…"
"Get back to your transfiguration, Hermione!" After a few minutes of silence, Harry raised his hand.
"Yes, Harry?"
"Ron threw his baseball cap at me."
"Ron, why did you throw your baseball cap at Harry?"
"Burning…with…jealousy…"
"Excuse me, Ron?"
"He ALWAYS gets the girls! He's constantly stealing Hermione from me, he really likes dating my sister to piss me off, and…"
"Yes, Ron?"
"It's okay. I'll always support Harry, because we're best friends…and because he's hot." Minerva sighed.
"Students, I'm going to leave a little early today…leave your bowls on the desk when you're done." She got up and quickly walked out of the classroom.