A/N : Thanx to; libraflyter, Screeching Dragon, Malfeus, Freezyboncoolipants, RoczniakB, fangfaceAndrea, samica, Spuffyfan4eva, sunnyhell, Electra126, wicked-angel3, books41, TaniTKD, RiddicksBabyGirl, Katie, Lucky-112, spuffyfan-1, Kim, Linda, Jovial, Red Wulf, ms trick, kathypg, MaidenRo, iluvglorfindel, Spuffyluvr, fearlessbuffy, Artemis Moonshine, aphelant, rubi-elektra, lrieder, Rachel, naiya-isis, Bunny, Dreamzone, Moonlight-is-Innocence, Kelley, electricgurl, for all the latest reviews. Good to know that you still like the story, and that you think that Spike is written well. Let's hope those facts are still true by the end of this chapter...

(For disclaimer, etc. - see chapter 1)

Chapter 13

Buffy did a lot of thinking on her way down to Santa Monica. It was an fairly short journey, but it still gave her mind plenty of time to wander and consider every aspect of her life. More than once she thought of jumping off the bus at the next station, turning around and going straight back to Sunnydale, to ride out the storm as it were, but a moment to consider the reaction of her friends was enough to change her mind right back again.

Giles would be so disappointed in her, not just because of the baby, but because of who the father was. Willow might understand, but Buffy knew her best friend too well. She knew the red-head would feel guilty for inadvertently causing the spell that led to the baby make-age, and she just couldn't deal with that right now.

Xander, well, he could barely stand the idea of Angel, and Buffy knew he thought even less of his un-souled grand-childe. Her thoughts then landed on Spike. She'd said some awful things to him, and for once she truly felt sorry for it. She'd tried telling herself he was a worthless demon, but since finding out he was the father of her unborn child, she'd been forced to remember just how wonderful he could be.

When they were under the thrall of Willow's spell and they'd been in love, well, he was still a pain in the ass, but he was also so kind and attentive. When he looked at her she could physically feel the love coming at her from his expressive blue eyes, and when he'd made love to her it was the most beautiful thing in the world. It was just the spell, that's what she'd told herself, but since then, even before he knew the baby was his, he'd been there for her.

The first to know she was pregnant and the last person she expected to help her, Spike had been a complete surprise. How he'd held her when she cried, cleverly convinced her to tell her mother the truth, pretty much saved the day when Faith pulled the body swap, and beaten up Parker despite the pain his chip caused. He'd even divulged secrets of his human self, and acted as if he were perfectly willing to be a proper father to their child.

All these thoughts were taking the ninety-ninth trip around Buffy's head when she arrived at the apartment, a suitcase in one hand, a bag over her shoulder and the keys dangling between her fingers as she stood by the front door.

A little alone time was what she needed, she realised as she manoeuvred her luggage enough to get her hand holding the key towards the lock. Some time out here, with the sun and the beach, thinking about the good and the bad and trying to find a way through it all without interruptions.

The door swung open as she pushed it and she took in the room. Spacious and nicely furnished, natural tones of cream and pale peach, clearly Mrs Rogers had done most of the decor. It looked relaxing and peaceful, with a large sofa and armchair to relax in and a vampire on the coffee table...what?!

"What the hell are you doing here?!" Buffy exploded angrily, shoving her bags onto the floor.

"And Hello to you too, pet" Spike smirked annoyingly from where he sat, all Buffy's thoughts about him being such a great person always disappeared when that smirk surfaced again.

"How did you...?" she was going to ask how he ended up in what was supposed to be her sanctuary when she suddenly realised the how really wasn't as important as "Why are you here?" she asked more tired that angry now. The lack of sleep last night, as well as the trip had taken it's toll, plus the overload of thoughts and feelings that she'd been having really hadn't helped.

"I would've thought that was obvious" the vampire rolled his eyes before reaching into the back pocket of his jeans. Buffy backed up a step, a reflex action as her Slayer instincts told her he was going to pull a weapon on her.

"It's a letter, you silly bint, not an unexploded bomb" Spike found he was quite angry to think that she felt he might hurt her, after all that had occurred these past few weeks. He held out the envelope to her and she eyed it warily before taking it from his hand. She read her name, written on the front in handwriting she knew so well.

"Mom?" she frowned as she tore it open and read the letter inside. Spike didn't know precisely what was written on the sheet of paper the Slayer now held, but Joyce had told him the gist of it.

She wanted them to do some talking, Buffy and him, work out what was going to happen when the little bit came along and such. He wasn't totally certain that Mrs Summers plan was the best ever, in fact he had doubts as to whether he was ever going to leave Santa Monica as anything other than a big pile of dust, but he'd risk it. Why did it all matter so much to him? The Slayer and the baby and what might happen to them if they were left alone out here? Spike was certain now that if he wasn't in love Buffy, then he was well on the way to falling.

"Why, Mom?" he suddenly realised Buffy was speaking, to the ceiling no less, but he figured that was partly because the person she was asking the question of wasn't actually there and partly because she didn't want him to see the tears he knew she was crying.

"She just wants us to talk, Slayer" Spike supplied, "like two reasonable adults, if you can manage it"

Buffy shot him a look for that remark but didn't have the strength to argue. With a sulky expression, like a child that had been told she will sit in the corner til she learnt to behave, Buffy tossed the letter down on the table beside the vampire, and sat herself down in the armchair to the side.

"You wanna talk? Fine, talk" she told him, folding her arms across her chest, "but I have nothing to say to you"

Spike sighed, looking heavenward as he shifted on the table til he was facing her. She was pretty much impossible, very stubborn, often far too emotional, and had the tendency to behave like a five year old when things didn't go precisely how she wanted them to. Still, Spike also knew she was passionate and kind and beautiful, and she knew how to piss him off like no one else could. It came down to the fact that there was a lot more he liked about her these days than he hated, and he wanted her to know that.

The problem was he wasn't so good with words, it'd always been through actions that he had proved himself to others, ever since he'd become a vampire anyway. As a human he'd been an awful poet, crap with words as well being too weak to hold his own in any kind of fight. Now it seemed he needed to find a way to verbalise what he was feeling. Easier said then done, but he figured showing her the other way was going to earn him a slap at best and a good staking at worst.

"Buffy" he began at last, "I know this is not how you planned your life to be, and I don't mean the Slayer thing or any of that, I'm talking about the baby" he explained, "Thing is, I know finding out I'm the father is probably even more disgusting to you than thinking it was that git Parker" he said sadly and Buffy suddenly wanted to tell him it wasn't but he didn't stop talking long enough for her to get a word in, "but this is a big deal to me" he told her, "I'm not supposed to be able to have kids, at least that's what all the bloody books say, and now it seems it's really happening" he paused for a moment, but the Slayer found there was a lump in her throat that prevented her from saying a word, "I've changed Buffy, and yeah, some of that is the chip, but even before that...I haven't been the same since I first turned up in Sunnyhell. Dru noticed, before I did, but now I'm starting to get it. It wasn't her leaving that did it, or this piece of silicon they shoved up my brain, I think it's all something to do with you"

He finally managed to keep his eyes on her for that last part. For the whole speech he'd been studying the floor or the walls, though he could feel her eyes burning into him. Still, for that final declaration, such as it was, he looked right into her eyes with his own and waited for some kind of reaction. He did not expect what he got as she put a hand up to her face and cried like a child.

At first he was unsure why precisely she was in tears. It didn't seem like she was disgusted, which was a good start, but she was definitely upset and that wasn't good. Taking a chance, he got up from the edge of the table and perched himself on the arm of the chair instead, daring to wrap an arm around her back. She leaned into his embrace, still sobbing her heart out and still not truly understanding, Spike just held her tight, with both arms now.

Eventually her crying slowed to a stop and she pulled away from him sharply, seemingly just realising what she was doing.

"I can't deal with this right now" she choked out, wiping her face with her hands and trying to be calm, "I can just about cope with my own feelings and the thought of this baby, but Spike, I can't handle your feelings too, not right now"

The vampire nodded absently. He'd just wanted her to know he was on her side and that he'd stand by her and all that rot, instead it seemed she'd thought he wanted something from her, something she didn't have right now. All in all it was looking like he'd made matters worse.

"Buffy?" it seemed she was determined not to look at him so he pulled himself off the arm of the chair and repositioned himself, crouching on the floor by her feet, "Buffy, I don't want anything from you" he told her, "I don't totally understand what I'm feeling myself so I could hardly expect you to know" he admitted, "but I do know that we're going to get through this" he promised her. When she looked like she was going to run, he took hold of her hands, and she looked back down at him.

"Do you believe me?" Spike checked, her expression unreadable to him.

"I don't know" she admitted, "This is all seems insane, and I don't know how I'm pregnant or why I can't hate you as much as I should...but I want to believe you" she told him, sniffing back further sobs.

"Well" Spike smiled slightly, "That's a start I s'pose"

- - - - - -

Joyce watched the hands of the clock on the wall of her office at the gallery. It was several hours since Buffy had caught the bus down to Santa Monica and she knew by now she'd have arrived and found Spike waiting. Joyce would have been proud of her decidedly cunning plan if she were not quite so worried it was all going to go wrong. The only flaw Spike had found was the invitation that he would need from the apartment's owner if he was going to get past the barrier at the door. She'd promised that wouldn't be a problem as she handed him the letter she wanted him to give to Buffy when the girl arrived at the place, and told him to set off as soon as he could.

Joyce barely slept once she got home and soon found it was time to rise and shine despite the fact she'd hardly closed her eyes at all. Buffy had headed off to fetch her things from the dorm as soon as she knew Willow would be in classes and Joyce had taken the opportunity to call Mr Rogers again. She told him Buffy would be taking her friend down to Santa Monica with her, and they would both be staying at the apartment, if that was okay. Some carefully worded questions soon had him saying those magic words 'If you trust Buffy and Spike, Joyce, then so do I. They are both perfectly welcome to use the place anytime they like' It seemed that was enough of an invite, since Spike had called Joyce, as instructed when he arrived.

The hands on the clock said just about lunch time and Joyce knew she was running out of ways to put off going to tell Rupert the truth about Buffy and her baby. She had promised her daughter that she wouldn't say where exactly she'd gone and she had already decided in her own mind it was best not to mention Spike's presence at the apartment.

"Joanna, I'm going for my lunch break now" she told her assistant, "I have my cell with me in case you have any problems, but I shouldn't be more than an hour" she promised. The girl said she was fine and told Joyce to have a nice lunch break.

The older woman sighed as she headed out of the front door of the gallery, thinking how best to word the news she had to give to Buffy's friends, Truth was, she was more worried about Buffy and Spike and what was happening where they were.

- - - - - -

"I think we all know why we're here" Giles called the Scooby meeting to order, consisting of Tara and Willow on his sofa and Xander in the opposite armchair with Anya on his lap "When Willow went back to the University this morning, it appeared that Buffy was not there and appeared not to have been all night"

"She's probably at her Mom's though, right?" Xander shrugged, not wanting to think about any other options. Bad things happening to his girls was not an option.

"I tried to call Joyce but she wasn't home" Giles told him "and the gallery phone has been engaged for most of the day" he sighed, removing his glasses and rubbing a hand over his tired face "I'm afraid we have to face the possibility that she has run away, again"

"She wouldn't go to LA again though, would she?" Willow put in her own opinion, closely followed by Anya, who shockingly agreed with her.

"That's where Angel is, right? I doubt he'd be too happy if she showed up on his doorstep carrying another man's child"

"That is a valid point" Giles was forced to agree, though he was rather surprised that the ex-demon had come up with it "but it's hard to know where else she might have gone"

All five of them looked puzzled and thoughtful as they tried to come up with an idea of where their friend might have gone, but their question was to be answered by another occupant of the room, one they hadn't even noticed was there.

"I can answer that question" said a female voice just inside the doorway.

"Joyce?" Giles looked surprised to see her, especially since she'd got into his apartment without him noticing.

"The door was open" she smiled, closing it again and walking over to where the Scoobies sat "You don't need to worry about Buffy, I know where she is and she's safe"

"Oh thank goddess" Willow gasped, she and Tara making room on the sofa for Joyce to join them "Where is she?"

"I can't tell you that" Mrs Summers looked down at her hands playing with the strap of her purse "She just wanted me to let you know she was okay" she assured them, looking over to Giles as she added "and she'll call you soon Rupert"

"Why would she run away again?" Willow looked upset that her friend would rather go off alone than talk to her about he problems. It was true the two of them had been drifting apart a little lately but had it really gotten this bad? "Okay, so her being pregnant, kind of a shock, but we'd be supportive, even if it is stinky Parker man's baby" she added with distaste. That gang all looked ready to agree until Joyce shook her head.

"It's not Parker's baby" she admitted "that's why Buffy went away. She was worried that you wouldn't understand"

Giles glasses were now being furiously polished as surprises came hurtling in from left right and centre. Xander reached across Anya' legs to pick up his bottle of soda from the table.

"Who could be worse than that jerk?" he scoffed, before putting the bottle to his lips.

"The father of the baby" Joyce sighed "is Spike"

The Coke in Xander's mouth made a world record worthy leap across the room as shock went through his body, the convulsion almost sending Anya tumbling to the ground. At the very same moment there was an audible crack as Giles' glasses polishing became a little too severe and the frames of his spectacles completely gave in under the pressure.

"Impossible!" the ex-Watcher practically exploded as Anya tried to clean up Xander and Willow's mouth dropped open like a fish.

"Y'know Buffy said that you'd say that" Joyce half-smiled at the strange scene before her "Apparently Riley told her" she explained further "the er...oh, whats it called...?" she asked as her mind went blank.

"I-Is it the I-Intiative?" Tara filled in, apparently the only person out of the Scoobies who was able to form an type of sentence right now. It made sense since she didn't know Buffy or the gang half so well, shocking news is less shocking when the people involved are not so close to you.

"Oh yes, the Initiative" Joyce nodded as she continued "Apparently when Buffy visited with Riley there were some scanners that she didn't know about. The sensors picked up on her pregnancy and I really don't understand how" she admitted "but they matched parts of the baby's DNA to records they had on Spike" when no-one answered her she continued to speak, just to fill the awkward silence "I don't think Buffy told me all the details, I was so confused by the basic facts that there was little point" she almost laughed but thought better of joking at a time like this.

"Good Lord" Giles sat back in his chair, tossing his now useless glasses onto the table "Vampire's fathering children" he shook his head "this is just...unprecedented"

"It never happens either" Xander pointed out, as usual missing the point.

"Poor Buffy" Willow felt awful for her friend and was glad of her girlfriend's arm around her shoulders.

"Poor Buffy?" Anya looked surprised by that comment "Personally I'd be saying congratulations to her. I mean, she must have had sex with Spike and we all know what great lovers vampires can be" she said, straight out and unashamed, as the ex-demon was prone to do. Xander shuddered involuntarily.

"There's a mental image I didn't need"

"But Buffy and Spike" Willow frowned, looking between her girlfriend and Giles "she wouldn't...y'know, with him"

"No..." Giles agreed, thinking it was terribly strange, before a nasty thought hit him and he sat up sharply "no" he repeated looking directly at Willow "not unless she was under a spell that made her believe she was in love with him"

All eyes went to the red head who suddenly felt sick with guilt.

"It's all my fault?" she realised, tears coming to her eyes, pushing herself further into Tara's embrace.

"I d-don't understand" the other witch looked to the gang for explanation a Willow cried on her shoulder.

"Willow performed a Will Be Done spell, shortly after Oz's departure" Giles sighed, wishing his glasses were not broken, he really felt the need to polish them right now "It didn't exactly go according to plan"

"Understatement of the century!" Xander pretty much yelled, sitting up straighter and almost losing his grip on Anya for a second time "I was a demon magnet, Giles was blind, and Buffy and Spike thought they were engaged!" he explained, with a wild arm gesture and an unhappy expression.

"Wow..." was all Tara could find to say. She'd had no idea Willow had been quite so powerful before they'd even met. She also felt desperately sorry for her girl, who was currently blaming herself entirely for something that was clearly an accident.

"I didn't mean to, and I'm sorry" the red-head sobbed still, and Joyce took pity on her, reaching to put a hand on her shoulder.

"Willow, come on, there's no use in worrying about it now" she told her in that soothing tone that only mothers seem to have "What's done is done and we'll just have to cope with it" she told her, finally helping the witch to stop her tears, but only just. The gang were still mostly in shock at the news, but thankfully they weren't blaming Buffy so far. Joyce had dreaded them having the reaction her daughter was sure they would - disgust and hate. If that had been true, knowing Buffy the way she did, Joyce knew the chances of her coming home were slim.

"Look I'm sorry but I can't stay, I really have to get back to the gallery" Mrs Summers said, as she checked her watch and stood up.

"Thankyou for letting us know, Joyce" Giles said absently, managing half a smile a woman he'd come to know quite well these past couple of years.

"You're welcome" she nodded once "and don't feel too badly Willow" she told her right before she left "For what it's worth, I really don't think Buffy is blaming you"

The only sound in the room was the front door clicking shut, and so the silence remained for several minutes as the group of friends let the news sink in. Buffy was having Spike's child and the only reason anyone knew was because Faith and Riley had let things slip.

"So what now?" Xander asked finally. The others looked bemused and he cringed when Anya opened her mouth to answer.

"Can't we get a hold of Riley?" she suggested "I mean, he's a commando right, can't we just grab him, tie him up, shine a light in his face until he tells us more useful stuff?"

"Ahn..." Xander rolled his eyes, but Giles interrupted whatever admonishment the boy was about to use.

"No Xander, although Anya may have gone a little over the top as it were, she could have a point" he realised as he sat forward in his chair, the look on his face that he only got when he was thinking of a plan "Riley was the one who told Buffy her child was a part of Spike, he may be our best way of finding out more on the subject" he commented.
"Sweetie, d-don't you have a Ps-psychology class today?" Tara asked Willow who had since managed to stem the flow of tears from her eyes and calm down a lot.

"Yeah" she nodded "but I don't feel like...oh, Riley, he's the TA in my class" she suddenly realised what her girlfriend meant.

"Do you think you're up to asking a few questions Willow? Maybe just catch up with him in the hall after class?" the ex-Watcher suggested and the witch nodded in reposse.

"I guess I could try"

"Right, then it's settled" Giles looked determined. He wanted to know precisely what was happening to his Slayer, his almost-daughter, and he'd do whatever he took to find out "Tara, if you get Willow back to the University, Xander, Anya, perhaps you could stay here with me and research?" he suggested.

"Research again?" Anya whined as Xander moved her off his lap and stood up to head for the book case "But we had plans, and they didn't involve books" she complained "well maybe one, with diagrams, but not the kind you have"

"Thankyou, that's quite enough" Giles interrupted, holding up a hand to silence her as he went over to the cabinet to find his spare glasses.

"We're staying Giles" Xander assured him from behind the book shelf "Just tell me what I'm looking for"
"Any cases of vampires causing pregnancy or Slayer's having children" the ex-Watcher told the boy who scanned the shelves for useful looking volumes "I confess I don't remember finding any evidence before, but I was so sure that these events had never occurred and never would" Giles found his other pair of spectacles and automatically started cleaning them as soon as they were in his hand "Perhaps in this situation, a more open-minded view is required"

To Be Continued...

A/N2: Review please and let me know what you think! More of this and 'Who's That Guy?' coming soon to a Fanfiction page near you! ;-)