"Lana Gets Humped"
An Alternative Version of "Crusade"
Jason left Lana to go plan a birthday party for her. She wondered whether it had been such a great idea to come to Notre Dame Cathedral to do this rubbing instead of sticking with the original plan. But she decided that she was there now, so she began her work. She spread out the paper over the cover of his final resting place and began rubbing her black crayon over the surface. What an ugly creature that man had been! Suddenly, a light burst forth into the room through the paper and Lana lost consciousness.
She heard someone pounding on her door. Somehow, she was now naked in bed under a light sheet. She pulled the sheet around her and stumbled to the door -- feeling disoriented and off-balance. It was Jason. He inquired why she hadn't met him as they planned. She asked him to wait for her downstairs.
She made her way to the bathroom and took a steamy shower. She still seemed unable to keep her balance. Something was very wrong. She wrapped a towel around her and went back into the other room. She had a full length mirror opposite her easel. She took a hand mirror to look over her shoulder. In front of her, the face on the easel leered at her. She looked at the rubbing and cringed at how disfigured he had been. She dropped her towel and looked in the hand mirror to see her back. She screamed. On her back was a hump that looked identical the hump on the back of the man in the rubbing in front of her -- Quasi Motto.
The End