A few mornings later, I wake to the sound of violent coughing. It alarms me
and I jump out of bed, pull on my housecoat and slippers and hurry into the
kitchen as the sound seems to be coming from there. Is it my father? I
don't know how well he'd be able to stand up to a cold or even the flu.
He's not nearly as strong as he used to be.
But the sight in the kitchen is a relief in more ways than one. John is hunched over the table, trying to down a steaming cup of coffee without coughing his lungs out. It seems he is the one who has the virus. I sit across from him and pour myself a small mug of tea, realizing my father must already be prowling around the house cleaning something before the others are up.
"What are you doing here John?" It's not the best way to greet him, but I'm in a blunt mood this morning.
He shakes his head, unable to answer because of a round of sneezes. He leans away from the table, not wanting to spread his germs and I cringe.
Jeff enters the room and puts some bread in the toaster. "Alan left last night after John radioed in to say he was sick. Being up in the space station when you have the flu is not something any of us would want to endure, Tin-Tin," he explains for his son.
I nod in understanding, but inside my heart is hammering with amazing strength. Without Alan around, I can easily avoid his probing looks and I only have to worry about keeping my relationship with Virgil from his family members. I try not to show how pleased I am that Alan is gone. I don't think I've ever been glad he wasn't in the house and the feeling of guilt rises in my stomach again, something I've become familiar with in the past few days.
The hours tick by slowly until the sun begins to set on the horizon, bathing Tracy Island in pale light. I stand on the deck, looking out at the water as the faint breeze whips my hair about my face. The tranquil scene is such a contradiction to what is playing out in my brain as I stare mindlessly at the ocean.
A beeping noise brings my head up and I notice I'm the only one near enough to the lounge to hear it. I walk back inside and press the button on Mr. Tracy's desk to open the connection when I see Alan's eyes blinking hastily in tune with the noise. I take a deep breath and attempt to make myself look as if everything were normal.
"Hi, Tin-Tin. Sorry I didn't get a chance to say goodbye." Alan's smiling face makes me want to break down and cry; he has no idea what I'm doing to him behind his back.
"That's okay, Alan. I just hope John gets better soon," I answer mechanically, my eyes barely focused on his picture.
"Me too. Say, is father around?"
"I think he's in the lab with Brains. I'll go get him." I glance up to see Virgil enter and avoid his gaze as he picks up an easy conversation with his brother. To an outsider, it wouldn't appear that anything was out of place, but I know Virgil is feeling like he's betraying Alan I'm amazed he can be so casual to him.
I find Mr. Tracy exactly where I guessed I would, puttering around in the laboratory while Brains tests out some new equipment. I tell him Alan wants to speak to him in the living room and then return to my post on the balcony, wistfully looking at the painted sky.
I detect a presence beside me and know who it is without turning my head. He stands next to me and rests his arms on the railing, watching my strained expression in the moonlight. "Want to go for a walk?" Virgil asks after a few minutes of silence.
"Sure," I reply, following him down the stairs to the beach. I take off my shoes and leave them on the bottom step with his before letting the cool sand chill the undersides of my feet and compress between my toes.
We amble along quietly, not saying anything but enjoying the other's company. The waves lap against the shore, creating a romantic mood I'm too apprehensive to detect. He notices my uneasiness and takes my hand in his as we stroll, captivated in our own thoughts. I raise my eyes to the sky and look at the stars, knowing Alan is up there somewhere - alone, and not knowing what is going on when he can't see.
Halfway down the beach we stop and he kisses me. It is the only time we've managed to get unaccompanied by one of the other people on the island. We savor the moment, his lips warm and comforting on mine until we pull apart and carry on down the sand.
We're startled by a loud sneeze and I quickly drop Virgil's hand and turn to look back at the villa. John's eyes are closed as he continues to cough and he disappears inside to get a glass of water. Beside him is Scott, and although his fair-haired brother was looking in the opposite direction, he is staring hard in ours, a remorseless expression on his face. I glance at Virgil, afraid our secret affair has been discovered.
We start towards the house and pick up our shoes on the way. Both of us are reluctant to enter the building, as we know Scott will most likely confront us if we meet him. He gives my hand one last reassuring squeeze and takes one door while I go up the stairs and take the other. At least this way, his older sibling will only catch one of us at a time.
Unfortunately, it's me.
Scott's waiting for me on the deck and I try to walk past him and pull open the door, but he hinders the movement. I'm forced to stand facing him and barely succeed in acting collected as he glares at me. "How long, Tin-Tin?" His voice is a low growl, filled with resentment towards me, the one sneaking around under his brother's nose.
I set my mouth in a firm line, wishing to appear innocent. "What are you talking about, Scott?"
"You know what I'm talking about. Don't lie to me." I don't know if I've ever seen him appear so livid with one of us before. "How long?" He repeats.
I know I've been caught and look illicitly at my sand-covered feet. "A few days ago, the night of our trip in the boat."
"Does Alan know?"
My eyes snap up to glower at him. "What do you think?" It takes all my self- control not to scream at him for being so dense. "Of course Alan doesn't know!" My defensive behavior is just a way to hide my remorse and Scott knows it as well as I do.
"Does Virgil make you happy?" I want to kill him for his soft yet menacing tone. It irritates me he can appear so calm when I'm about to blow my top and I'm not even the one who ought to be angered.
But I've never thought about it in terms of happiness before. I nod slowly, looking down at the sand where our footprints are still visible.
"Did Alan?"
The question catches me off guard and I glance back at him. "Yes," I respond in a whisper, "Yes, Alan always made me happy."
"So why aren't you being truthful with him?"
I can't believe he expects me to tell his brother I'm cheating on him. "What would I say?"
"If you want to continue with Virgil, you aren't going to be able to keep it concealed much longer," Scott says astutely and I know he's right.
I let out a sigh, realizing I'm going to have to expose Alan to our clandestine relationship soon. "What am I going to do, Scott?" I ask desperately, knowing I'm going to break his heart and shatter what's left of mine. Virgil is going to have a lot of pieces to pick up.
If I were heartless and cold, I would have dropped Alan as soon as the prospect of Virgil came along. Am I fickle enough to risk everything I have experienced with him for someone new? The damage has already been done, and I can't go back and change what I feel for his older brother.
"You're on your own, Tin-Tin," Scott replies, giving me a final incisive look before going inside.
I gaze at the dark sky, the sun barely visible now. The stars shine brightly above my head and I pick a single large one out, wondering if it's Thunderbird 5. Inside that little speck in the dark blanket above my head is Alan, and he has no idea what awaits him when he returns to earth.
But the sight in the kitchen is a relief in more ways than one. John is hunched over the table, trying to down a steaming cup of coffee without coughing his lungs out. It seems he is the one who has the virus. I sit across from him and pour myself a small mug of tea, realizing my father must already be prowling around the house cleaning something before the others are up.
"What are you doing here John?" It's not the best way to greet him, but I'm in a blunt mood this morning.
He shakes his head, unable to answer because of a round of sneezes. He leans away from the table, not wanting to spread his germs and I cringe.
Jeff enters the room and puts some bread in the toaster. "Alan left last night after John radioed in to say he was sick. Being up in the space station when you have the flu is not something any of us would want to endure, Tin-Tin," he explains for his son.
I nod in understanding, but inside my heart is hammering with amazing strength. Without Alan around, I can easily avoid his probing looks and I only have to worry about keeping my relationship with Virgil from his family members. I try not to show how pleased I am that Alan is gone. I don't think I've ever been glad he wasn't in the house and the feeling of guilt rises in my stomach again, something I've become familiar with in the past few days.
The hours tick by slowly until the sun begins to set on the horizon, bathing Tracy Island in pale light. I stand on the deck, looking out at the water as the faint breeze whips my hair about my face. The tranquil scene is such a contradiction to what is playing out in my brain as I stare mindlessly at the ocean.
A beeping noise brings my head up and I notice I'm the only one near enough to the lounge to hear it. I walk back inside and press the button on Mr. Tracy's desk to open the connection when I see Alan's eyes blinking hastily in tune with the noise. I take a deep breath and attempt to make myself look as if everything were normal.
"Hi, Tin-Tin. Sorry I didn't get a chance to say goodbye." Alan's smiling face makes me want to break down and cry; he has no idea what I'm doing to him behind his back.
"That's okay, Alan. I just hope John gets better soon," I answer mechanically, my eyes barely focused on his picture.
"Me too. Say, is father around?"
"I think he's in the lab with Brains. I'll go get him." I glance up to see Virgil enter and avoid his gaze as he picks up an easy conversation with his brother. To an outsider, it wouldn't appear that anything was out of place, but I know Virgil is feeling like he's betraying Alan I'm amazed he can be so casual to him.
I find Mr. Tracy exactly where I guessed I would, puttering around in the laboratory while Brains tests out some new equipment. I tell him Alan wants to speak to him in the living room and then return to my post on the balcony, wistfully looking at the painted sky.
I detect a presence beside me and know who it is without turning my head. He stands next to me and rests his arms on the railing, watching my strained expression in the moonlight. "Want to go for a walk?" Virgil asks after a few minutes of silence.
"Sure," I reply, following him down the stairs to the beach. I take off my shoes and leave them on the bottom step with his before letting the cool sand chill the undersides of my feet and compress between my toes.
We amble along quietly, not saying anything but enjoying the other's company. The waves lap against the shore, creating a romantic mood I'm too apprehensive to detect. He notices my uneasiness and takes my hand in his as we stroll, captivated in our own thoughts. I raise my eyes to the sky and look at the stars, knowing Alan is up there somewhere - alone, and not knowing what is going on when he can't see.
Halfway down the beach we stop and he kisses me. It is the only time we've managed to get unaccompanied by one of the other people on the island. We savor the moment, his lips warm and comforting on mine until we pull apart and carry on down the sand.
We're startled by a loud sneeze and I quickly drop Virgil's hand and turn to look back at the villa. John's eyes are closed as he continues to cough and he disappears inside to get a glass of water. Beside him is Scott, and although his fair-haired brother was looking in the opposite direction, he is staring hard in ours, a remorseless expression on his face. I glance at Virgil, afraid our secret affair has been discovered.
We start towards the house and pick up our shoes on the way. Both of us are reluctant to enter the building, as we know Scott will most likely confront us if we meet him. He gives my hand one last reassuring squeeze and takes one door while I go up the stairs and take the other. At least this way, his older sibling will only catch one of us at a time.
Unfortunately, it's me.
Scott's waiting for me on the deck and I try to walk past him and pull open the door, but he hinders the movement. I'm forced to stand facing him and barely succeed in acting collected as he glares at me. "How long, Tin-Tin?" His voice is a low growl, filled with resentment towards me, the one sneaking around under his brother's nose.
I set my mouth in a firm line, wishing to appear innocent. "What are you talking about, Scott?"
"You know what I'm talking about. Don't lie to me." I don't know if I've ever seen him appear so livid with one of us before. "How long?" He repeats.
I know I've been caught and look illicitly at my sand-covered feet. "A few days ago, the night of our trip in the boat."
"Does Alan know?"
My eyes snap up to glower at him. "What do you think?" It takes all my self- control not to scream at him for being so dense. "Of course Alan doesn't know!" My defensive behavior is just a way to hide my remorse and Scott knows it as well as I do.
"Does Virgil make you happy?" I want to kill him for his soft yet menacing tone. It irritates me he can appear so calm when I'm about to blow my top and I'm not even the one who ought to be angered.
But I've never thought about it in terms of happiness before. I nod slowly, looking down at the sand where our footprints are still visible.
"Did Alan?"
The question catches me off guard and I glance back at him. "Yes," I respond in a whisper, "Yes, Alan always made me happy."
"So why aren't you being truthful with him?"
I can't believe he expects me to tell his brother I'm cheating on him. "What would I say?"
"If you want to continue with Virgil, you aren't going to be able to keep it concealed much longer," Scott says astutely and I know he's right.
I let out a sigh, realizing I'm going to have to expose Alan to our clandestine relationship soon. "What am I going to do, Scott?" I ask desperately, knowing I'm going to break his heart and shatter what's left of mine. Virgil is going to have a lot of pieces to pick up.
If I were heartless and cold, I would have dropped Alan as soon as the prospect of Virgil came along. Am I fickle enough to risk everything I have experienced with him for someone new? The damage has already been done, and I can't go back and change what I feel for his older brother.
"You're on your own, Tin-Tin," Scott replies, giving me a final incisive look before going inside.
I gaze at the dark sky, the sun barely visible now. The stars shine brightly above my head and I pick a single large one out, wondering if it's Thunderbird 5. Inside that little speck in the dark blanket above my head is Alan, and he has no idea what awaits him when he returns to earth.