A/N: This is in direct response to the fairly overwhelming response I got to the last chapter. Six reviews within 24 hours is fairly impressive. See what happens when you review? I post faster. Ooh, yeah. This chapter will be fairly disjointed as well.
Disclaimer: So I says to him, I says, "Joss, I'm stealing your characters and I'm going to make them do my evil bidding."

Last time, on Crushed: William observed the Scooby interaction. Dawn lauded Buffy's running away abilities. Buffy decided to put them to use once more. Spike stole a Winnebago. Tara accidentally opened the blinds and burnt Spike's hand. Spike grasped a sword blade with his bare hands. Poor Spike.

History doesn't always repeat

Spike tried to get his lighter to work, a job made infinitely more difficult by the stiff bandages that had been wrapped around his lacerated hands. He flicked at the lighter in an ineffectual rage. Xander crossed the room and grabbed the small lighter from the vampire's hands, flicking his fingers across the wheel.

"You know, these things'll kill you" the young man mentioned in an offhand tone. Spike raised an eyebrow, taking a drag on his cigarette. "Oh, right... Did I mention today how much I don't like you?"

"You mighta let it slip... once or twice" the blond vampire replied with a soft smirk. This was more comfortable than the forced friendship. The barbs were expected, natural.

"How are your feelers?" Xander asked, wiggling his fingers in front of Spike as though the vampire would not understand otherwise.

"Nothing compared to the little bits we're gonna get chopped into when the Renaissance Fair kicks the door in." The vampire paused, peering into the other room. He could just see Giles, lying on the stretcher, being treated by the nurse, with the little Bit and William hovering over his shoulder. "And here we bloody sit."

"Not like we've got much of a choice" was the reply, Xander shrugging in resignation of their untenable position.

"Make a break for it! Use General Armor-all as shield, get to the doc's car and-"

"Great plan. And while all the hacking and slashing is going on, what are you gonna be doing, huh? Throwing migraines at them?"

"Look, we stay here, we all die! At least some of us might get-"

"No!" Buffy declared emphatically, having just entered the room. "We're all gonna make it. I'm not losing anyone." With a shake of her head, Buffy returned to the main room where Willow, Tara, Giles, her sister, William and Ben all waited. With a snort, Spike sauntered to the doorway and leaned against it.

William was aware of the tension in the room, even if he didn't understand why it was there. It had increased tenfold while Buffy and the others had been talking to the man they had taken hostage after the battle, but William had stayed to watch over Giles.

It had been a horrible shock when the spear had flown through the front window of the Winnebago (which, William was sure, was a torture device of some kind...) and impaled the older Englishman. It had been a shock because none of the Scoobies had acted as though they would lose, not even in their despair.

He had felt a great deal of relief when the physician had been called. It was something familiar and reassuring, and it had given the hope that Giles would be all right after all. William had purposefully stayed with the older man since they had arrived, doing his best to help him or ease his pain.

Then Buffy and the others had come back into the room, much more tense than before. The tension, the medieval army camped outside of the abandoned building, it was all very surreal.

With a small sigh, and a slight twinge of discomfort from his almost healed ribs, William looked around the room. Giles was laid out on the table next to him, Buffy was talking to Willow and Tara in one corner. Xander was sitting with his arms around Anya near the door. Spike had gone to keep an eye on Dawn while she was in the toilet, and the physician was sitting on the other side of Giles.

"You have to let me out! You don't understand, I gotta get out! Open a door! Now!" Ben, the physician, started to shout, running towards the door. William blinked rapidly then readjusted his glasses.

"What happened?" Buffy asked, her tone worried. Spike appeared in the doorway, drawn by the yelling.

"I- I don't know. He just started yelling-" William tried to explain.

"Let me out!" Ben cried again. Buffy looked at the screaming man, then at her friend Willow.

"Okay, Will, open a door-" Buffy ceased talking, staring in horror at Glory. William felt his mouth drop open. How had the hellgod got past the barrier spell without Willow knowing?

"Well, whadda you know? Little Ben finally did something right." the blonde god drawled.

Spike sprinted across the intervening space with a roar as Xander attacked from another direction. Glory negligently backhanded Spike into the young carpenter, knocking them both into the wall near Anya.

Buffy darted forward as Willow began to chant. With a light chuckle, Glory hurled the Slayer into the witch, and they crumpled down to the ground next to the terrified Tara. William froze as the god looked at him. Glory blinked slowly, then looked at the still incapacitated Spike and back to William.

"Hey, would you look at that? My minions must have been right."

And with that, she stalked across the floor and hauled the stunned Brit out of the building.

Spike stretched, feeling the slightest tightness in his skin from his horrific injuries but no pain. Buffy was in the back room, checking on Dawn. Spike thought they'd been incredibly lucky. Ben had turned into Glory, and none of them were dead. The stupid bint didn't have the Bit or the Slayer, only the stupid ponce.

Of course, these sodding white hats couldn't just take this as their good luck and let Glory have him. Surely it wouldn't be long before the stupid wannabe god figured out she'd grabbed the wrong one and come after the Bit. They should be running, not making plans to go find the nance. A thought occurred to him.

"Uh, Will? Now, uh, don't turn me into a horned toad for asking, but - what if we come across Ben?"

"I don't think a doctor's what anybody needs right now." she replied with a frown. Spike rolled his eyes.

"Well, yeah. Specially not one who also happens to be Glory."

"What do you mean?" Giles asked, having healed enough to be able to sit up and move for short periods of time.

"You know... Ben is Glory." Spike iterated slowly.

"You mean Ben's with Glory?" Willow asked, confused.

"'With' in what sense?" Xander asked with a suspicious frown.

"They're working together?" Anya asked in panic.

"No, no. Ben is Glory. Glory's Ben. They're one and the same."

"When did all this happen?" Anya queried, completely lost.

"Not one hour ago!" Spike yelled, exasperated. "Right here, before your very eyes! Ben came, turned into Glory, snatched the poofter, and - phht! - vanished. Remember? You do remember? Is everyone here very stoned? Ben. Glory. He's a doctor. She's the Beast. Two entirely separate entities, sharing one body. It's like a bloody sitcom! Surely, you remember!"

"So you're saying... Ben, and Glory ... "

"Have a... connection." Anya finished her boyfriend's sentence hesitantly.

"Yes, obviously. But what kind?" Giles stated. Spike stared around the room wildly for a minute.

"Oh! I get it. Very crafty. Glory's worked the kind of mojo where anyone who sees her little presto- chango instantly forgets. And yours truly, being somewhat other than human, stands immune."

"So, Ben and Glory are... the same person?" Willow asked tentatively.

"Glory can turn into Ben, and Ben turns back into Glory." Xander stated, an epiphany dawning.

"And anyone who sees it instantly forgets." Anya, finally catching on.

"And a kewpie doll for the lady." Spike exclaimed.

"Excellent. Now. Do we suspect that there may be some kind of connection between Ben and Glory?" Giles, the voice of reason, put the question to the group, and they pondered it while Spike groaned loudly and banged his head against the post behind him.

William was very worried. Not only had he discovered that Glory and Ben were the same person, which wasn't actually as hard to believe as it once would have been, especially when you realise that William himself had travelled through time, after a fashion.

What he found so disturbing was that both Ben and Glory were arguing with the other. Over him.

"But he's not the Key" a deep, masculine voice.

"He has to be, sweety. My scabby babies said that he was new in the Slayer's life and he absolutely reeks of magic."

"But what about the crazy people? They said it was the girl."

"Who are we going to trust? My minions, my nose and me or a bunch of lunatics who've had their brain sucked out?"

"I don't know..."

"Look, the Slayer's sister has been around for fourteen years. This is my Key. He showed up a couple of weeks ago. He's knew, he smells of magic. It fits."

Glory/Ben looked directly at William. He still hadn't spoken. He'd been captured for three hours now, and for the last forty five minutes Glory/Ben had been shifting rapidly as the barrier between them weakened.

"You're my Key, aren't you precious?" Glory asked, running a manicured fingernail around the young man's face.

"I'm afraid I have no idea what you're talking about." William said stiffly, his accent stronger than it usually was in his attempt to retain dignity. A look of distaste flashed across Glory's face, before it shifted to Ben's, who snatched their hand back.

"I knew it was Dawn. I won't let you get her Glory." William stared at the man-god before all the pieces fell into place. He couldn't help it. The tension of the past few days, especially the hours of his captivity, and now this ludicrous thought. He couldn't help it. He giggled.

"What are you laughing at, precious?" Glory asked, her voice annoyingly pitched.

"You- you think that.. Dawn.. is the Key?" he managed to ask in between giggles.

"Argh! You and the Slayer are just doing this to annoy me, I know it! Now, either you're the Key or the Slayer's sister is the Key. Which one is it?" The hellgod stood, hands on hips, with an almost comically stern expression.

William was about to tell her the truth, that neither of them were the Key and that he had no idea who or what the Key was, when he recalled what had happened as they had left the abandoned building. An entire army had been devastated by Glory alone, and she had barely tried. It was obvious that she wouldn't believe him if he said Dawn wasn't the Key, and while he would be willing to sacrifice himself, he was not willing to let the young girl die as well.

"I... I am your Key." He stated, subdued. He would still die, but at least this way he would die alone and let Buffy and the others to run. He wasn't deluded enough to believe that they would come for him, but this would buy them time to escape. It was the least he could do for the best friends he had ever had, even if they'd only been nice out of pity.

Spike sauntered back to Xander, after having checked Glory's house for the ponce. Only because the Slayer asked him too. He was not, in any way shape or form, attached to his human self.

"Found Ben's room at Glory's. Didn't learn much."

"Wait - Ben? At Glory's? You're saying that all this time he was sub-letting from her?" Xander asked in confusion.

"This - is gonna be worth it." Spike said, before smacking Xander on the back of the head. Hard. Both men let out the same cry.

"OW!"

"Last time, from the top..." Spike said, tiredly.

Buffy looked at her friends, gathered around the table at the magic box. There was only a few hours before the ritual that would kill William, and they were drawing up blanks as to how to get him back.

"We don't have to kill her. Uh, we just have to stop her from doing the ritual. I mean, there's only the one time that she can do it, right?" Willow asked hopefully.

"Yeah. We get her on the ropes, we just gotta keep her occupied till it's too late." Spike agreed, latching on to the idea. "Okay. But I'm still not hearing enough ideas. She's a god. Let's think outside the box." Anya stated cheerfully, obviously still pleased that she integrated so perfectly into regular human society. Buffy smiled faintly at the memories the thought brought up. "Why don't you go think outside the bleeding box?" Spike asked, his tone acid. "Yes, Anya, apart from your incredibly uninfectious enthusiasm, have you anything else to contribu-" Giles began dryly. "The Dagon sphere!" Anya cut in hurriedly, inspiration striking. "Sorry?" Giles looked completely lost. "When Buffy first met Glory, she found that magical glowy sphere that was meant to repel Glory." Anya explained patiently. "We've got it in the basement." At everyone's surprised look she continued. "It might drive her away or hurt her. Ooh!"

"And Olaf the troll god's enchanted hammer." She said with a gesture towards the hammer in question. "You wanna fight a god, use the weapon of a god."

Buffy crossed the room to the hammer.

"Uh... nah, that thing's too heavy to-" Spike began, slightly embarrassed. His eyes widened slightly as Buffy hefted the hammer thoughtfully with her left hand. "Yeah. Good."

"I like this. Thanks." Buffy said, pleased to finally begin to have a fighting chance against the hellgod. "Here to help. Wanna live." Anya said in a humble tone.

"Smart chicks are soooo hot." Her secret fiancée said with a fond look.

"You couldn't have figured that out in tenth grade?" Willow asked in mock despair, referring to her high school crush. The friends just smiled.

Spike climbed the tower as fast as he could. He didn't like leaving the fray behind, but all of Glory's demon minions were dead and he couldn't do anything to the human ones that were left, so he was put on William rescue.

Buffy fought Glory below. Spike wanted to help, but he was realistic enough to admit he would just be a liability. He wasn't as fast or as strong as the Slayer, and he couldn't hurt the god. None of the others could protect William though.

He'd been sent on this mission by Willow, who'd noticed that there was already someone on the tower. Spike was already regretting his promise to the Slayer to rescue his human half. It just wasn't worth it, but he'd get himself a soul before he willingly hurt his Slayer.

He arrived at the top level of the platform to see two things that shocked him. One was the demon, Doc, who he had killed. Or who he'd thought he killed. The other was his human half in a ceremonial dress. That caused Spike to shudder. That would be coming off before anybody saw it. He had already been mistaken for Spike at least twice by the demon world, and this would ruin the remnants of his reputation.

"Well. What do you know? It's just about that time." Doc said to William in his too friendly voice. Spike hated the demon with a passion.

"Spike?!" William asked in shock. Doc whirled around as Spike strode forward.

"Doesn't a fella stay dead when you kill him?" Spike asked in a rhetorical voice.

"Look who's talking." the demon replied with a wry grin.

"Come on, Doc. Let's you and me have a go." Spike smirked, playing up the role of the Big Bad to it's best.

"I... do have a prior appointment."

"This won't take long." the vampire assured him. "No, I-I don't imagine it will." Doc agreed.

Spike lunged forward as fast as he could, using his vampire speed to maximum effect, only to be caught around the neck by the deceptive Doc. The ceremonial knife was driven into Spike's back, causing a gasp from the vampire and a wince from his human counter part. The knife fell to the platform and Spike threw the small demon away, standing in between the demon and the Englishman.

"You don't come near the wanker, Doc." Spike said grimly, determined to keep his promise to Buffy.

"I don't smell a soul anywhere on you. Why do you even care?" Doc asked, his curiosity piqued.

"I made a promise to a lady." the bleach blond vampire said simply.

"Oh?" Doc's long tongue darts from his mouth, distracting Spike, who ducked, before sweeping his legs out from under him with his tail. Dragging the vampire to his feet, his arms pinned behind his back, Doc shifted him to the edge of the platform. "Then I'll send the lady your regrets."

Spike sent an agonised look towards the Slayer, a small figure on the ground, battling the god. William's face fell, his only chance at salvation rapidly disappearing.

"No." Spike growled, deep in his chest, before Doc shoved him from the platform. Spike fell, landing with a sickening crunch on a pile of bricks. Doc smiled gently, then picked up the knife and turned to William again.

William gasped as Doc drew the knife across his stomach again. He was muttering softly as he worked.

"Shallow cuts... shallow cuts..."

William blinked. He thought he saw...

"Buffy?" Doc spun on his heel and, on seeing the Slayer, adopted a fighting stance.

"This should be interesting" He said. Buffy didn't even look at him, her eyes trained on William. As she passed, she gave the demon a shove, sending him screaming off the other side of the platform.

"Let's get you out of here." She said to William, who sagged in relief.

A/N: Whew! That was work and a half. It was so hard not to include the entire episode, The Gift. It was my favourite one. I hope none of you thought I'd still be killing Buffy off. I mean, that would make this story angst and this is my lighthearted piece. I think I pulled it off okay, it was a little disjointed though. From here on out though, it's all original stuff. What did you all think? Lemme know.

Remember, Read, Review. I would have left this here if not for the steady inflow of support from my readers. Don't be a mooch, review. It's free and it doesn't take long.