A Twist of Events

By IsisFireDancer

DISCLAIMER: As usual I own nothing. This is slash so you can go away if you don't like it. GRRR! Feel irritable. Any brilliance you spot is probably J.K. Rowlings, as I highly doubt it is mine. Any mistakes can be blamed on me. I currently have a tendency to invent new words that no one else can understand. Anyway, I'll shut up now. Enjoy...

CHAPTER 3: Hopes and Fears

LILY POV

I finally found Remus on his own in the library, as James had predicted. He was sitting in the corner staring out of the window. I reached over and placed my hand on his shoulder to get his attention.

He spun around and looked at me in shock but I didn't really notice, as I was too busy staring at the tears that were falling down his face.

I don't think I've ever seen Remus cry before. He's one of those private people who always bottles up his emotions, so I guess it was a shock to see such a change in him.

I pull up a chair and sit next to him as he wipes some of the tears from his eyes. I can see that he's puzzled to see me.

"Lily? What are you doing here?" he asked, hastily trying to wipe away any evidence that he had been crying. It wasn't working. His face was red and blotchy and the top of his robe was damp. He wiped his hands on his robes and looked at me in such a helpless way that I wanted to hug him.

"Why were you crying?" I asked, deciding to see what he was willing to tell me before I told him what I knew.

"I take it you know about what happened between me and Sirius last night," he said, fiddling with a piece of thread that was hanging off the sleeve of his robe. I nodded waiting for him to continue. To my surprise another tear fell down his face.

"Remus? Come here," I said, pulling him into an embrace and gently rocking him. "Sirius... He was just worried about you. We all are. I just want to know how I can help you."

"Do you really want to know?" he almost whispered, pulling himself out of my arms. I looked at him; tears running down his face and emotion emanating from every fibre of his being. He looked so vulnerable and o hurt.

"Yes, I do want to know. Please, Remus, you have to tell me. It kills me to see you like this," I said quietly.

"Do you promise that you won't tell anyone and you won't laugh or... or hate me for it," he said, looking at me in earnest. I nodded. "I don't believe I'm going to tell you this."

REMUS POV

"The thing is..." I said, taking a deep breath. I looked into Lily's eyes and prepared myself for her reaction. Why was I even telling her? "I-I'm in love with Sirius."

"You are?" she asked softly. "Wow. I can see how that's a problem. Why did you think I'd hate you for it? It doesn't matter, you're still the same Remus," she smiled at me. "I think it's kind of sweet."

"You do?" I asked in complete and utter amazement. "I just thought that... you'd think I was weird and stop being my friend."

"No way," she said. "Like I'd do that to a friend! How evil do you think I am? Anyway, I'm going to help you in every way possible."

"You will?" I asked, still feeling very shell-shocked and rather queasy. Lily's reaction made it a whole lot easier to think about telling Sirius.

"Don't look so shocked," she said, grinning at me. "So... When are you going to tell Sirius?"

"What do you mean tell Sirius?" I asked, the words reverberating through my body. Tell Sirius... Tell Sirius... "I can't. It'd ruin everything."

"You're not going to tell him?" she asked, looking at me incredulously. "You have to tell him Remus. You have to. He might feel the same way about you, you just don't know. The question is, do you want to spend the rest of your life in pain, wishing you'd done something or you can tell him and feel glad that you at least had courage enough to do that."

"But... I'm scared," I whisper, feeling ashamed and very stupid.

"Everyone gets scared at some time, you just have to get over that and work up the guts to face your fears and embrace your dreams instead," said Lily. "Besides, it'll sound better coming from you than from someone else. You really have to tell him soon, Remus or someone else might get there before you." Lily got up. "Think about it," she said and turned to leave.

"WAIT!" I hear myself crying out. She turned back. "You can tell James and Peter if you want to, but tell them not to tell Sirius. If you see him anywhere, tell him to meet me up here." I smiled at her.

"Of course I will Remus," she said, smiling at me broadly. "He won't freak out, I promise you." And with this she left.

I returned to looking out of the window. Lily was right-I had to tell Sirius and as soon as possible. I just couldn't bear it if he was in love with someone else, it would break my world, me. It'd be like being dead.

"Remus?" I whipped around, immediately falling into a pair of azure eyes. Oh God. I had to tell him. I had to tell him now.

"Sirius," I said, trembling in anticipation and fear. How the HELL am I going to tell him? "I need to talk to you. Sit down."

"Lily sent me up, she said that you needed to speak with me urgently. She looked very flustered," he said, giving me one of his gorgeous crooked smiles. I almost melted on the spot.

"Um, yes. Well, it's about why I've been acting so weird recently and it has something to do with that fight we had yesterday," I said.

"Yeah, um.. About that... I'm really sorry I shouted at you," he said, giving me another smile. He'd better stop smiling at me or I'll jump on him and devour him right here, right now! I wonder if he's a good kisser... Christ! I'm acting like a girl! "Uh... Remus!"

"Oh yeah, sorry. Please don't hate me for telling you this, but the reason I've been acting so crazy is because-"

"Mr Black!"

"What the hell?" I asked, exceedingly pissed off that someone had just ruined the moment. I soon began to regret what I had just yelled, when Professor McGonagall appeared at the edge of the bookcase. "Sorry Professor."

"If you don't mind Mr Lupin I need to speak to Mr Black for a moment," she said, looking at me pointedly (AN: Is that even a word? Well... It is now!).

"I'll go, don't worry," I said, pulling myself up and out of my chair. I sighed internally and decided to go and find Lily before she did anything stupid. I could really do without saucy rumours going round my friends.

I made my way up the staircase that lead to the portrait of the Fat Lady, feeling belated. How could McGonagall have interrupted us at that particular moment??? Did she nothing of the virtue of good timing?

Suddenly, a thought crossed my mind. Maybe it was a sign. Maybe it was a sign that it wasn't meant to be. Maybe I was just being completely paranoid.

Why was life always so bloody complicated? If there was a god, he must hate my guts.

"Why is it always me?" I asked no one in particular. "What did I do specifically? But then, life isn't supposed to be easy."

"That's lovely dear, but could I just have the password please?" I almost jumped out of my skin, finding myself in front of the Fat Lady.

"Oh sorry. Opium," I said, waiting to be omitted into the warmth of the common room. Carefully, I stepped inside the portrait. I spotted Lily in an instant, talking to James and Peter.

I walked towards them, angling for the comfy armchair. It was so squishy you could almost get lost in it. That's what I wanted just then: to be lost. I sat down, immediately putting myself in Lily's attentions.

"Remus!" she cried in a very breathless voice. She was obviously waiting for me to tell her that we had confessed our undying love for one another. "What happened? Did you tell him?"

"No, McGonagall interrupted me at a crucial moment," I said, hearing the bitterness in my own voice. "I take it you've told them," I said motioning towards James and Peter.

"No I haven't actually, I thought it would sound better coming from you. What do you think McGonagall wanted with Sirius?"

"God knows," I said. "Couldn't she have just waited until another time to go and find Sirius?"

"So... When are you going to tell him?" asked Lily, fiddling with a small strand of her fiery red hair.

"I... I don't know if I'm going to," I said, slowly. I looked at Lily's pained face. "I think it's like a sign telling me not to do it."

"Remus... Please don't do this to yourself. It's just not fair," she said, staring straight into my eyes. I knew she meant it. "James, help me prove my point to him," she said, turning on James with pleading eyes.

"I would but I still have no idea what either of you are talking about," responded James, clearly surprised to be brought into the conversation.

"Love. James, it's about love. If you were in love with someone, you'd tell them wouldn't you? You wouldn't let them go, let your heart break. You'd have to tell them."

"You're in love? Who-" James began, appearing quite shocked by Lily's words.

"Sirius."

"Sirius? What the hell has Sirius got to do with any of this?" asked James. Lily gave him an exasperated look and I wondered how people could be so stupid at times.

"James... I'm in love with Sirius," I said, almost whispering his name. I looked to him for a response, but he seemed a little shocked. The only response that came from Peter was a snore.

"Uh... Remus, if you think he'll make you happy... then I'm alright with it," said James, as I smiled at him gratefully. "So what are you gonna do about this whole situation?"

James' question was left unanswered, as Sirius came through the portrait. All eyes were on him as he came to sit near us. His handsome face was expressionless.

"What is it?" James asked quietly, voicing the thoughts of everyone in our little group.

AN: I too evil! Review if you want more! AND there is still cake up for grabs. Hope everyone is still good. Blessed Be! P.S. Thanks to any reviewers who have reviewed this in the last five minutes as I posted this chappie right after chapter two! I award you cake!