AUTHOR:Mnemosyne
Disclaimer: I WISH I could own them! But they're all the property of Tribune, etc.
Summary: The "new" Trance reacclamates to life on the Andromeda, and thinks back on the events that brought her there.
Rating: G
Spoilers: Up to and (especially!) including "Ouroboros."
Notes:
I wrote this story years ago, shortly after "Ouroboros" first aired and everyone was trying to adjust to Golden Trance. Sure, I miss Purple Trance, but I liked new Trance immediately, and wanted to write a story that cast her in a good light, since I knew there would be plenty of people out there who would just cast her aside out of hand. I just recently stumbled across this again, gathering dust on my hard drive, so I decided to post it for you all, to keep it somewhere I could find it more easily. I know it's hopelessly outdated now, but please enjoy nonetheless!
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See what's become of me
While I look around
For my possibilities..."
-Simon and Garfunkel
"Hazy Shade of Winter"
It was the first shower she'd had in days, and it felt like heaven. Trance ran the sponge up and down her gold-toned arm, enjoying the rough scrape of it. Showers in her future had been rare indulgences, usually taken in the spare moments between firefights. Certainly never with something as unnecessary as a sponge.
She arched her throat into the stream of warm water, sighing as it ran down her back and over her belly. In the one perfect possible future, everyone would be able to have a shower, and they'd be able to choose from a zillion different sponges. If the strings of probability hadn't dictated that, then they weren't as all-powerful as everyone always assumed.
After several more minutes of letting the water pour through her long red hair, she shut off the shower, her futuristic tendency to conserve water kicking in despite the lack of need to do so. Better safe than sorry, she thought, stepping out of the shower onto the soft bath mat. It felt good between her toes, and she wiggled her feet on it, giggling.
That made her look up, catching her reflection in the mirror. For a moment, she'd forgotten who she was, what she'd seen in her life. For a moment, she'd been that optimistic, sparkly purple girl who'd walked into the temporal storm of malfunctioning tesseracts in a hopeful attempt to change the future. The early version of herself.
But staring at her reflection, Trance knew that girl was gone forever. The youthful purple hue of her skin had faded to mere background, supplanted by a pale golden tone that made her eyes look dark, almost menacing. Her species didn't age like most creatures in the galaxy, but they did grow older. Especially when they'd seen as much bloodshed, made as many mistakes, as she had.
Stop that, she told herself firmly, taking a towel and patting it over her skin. Don't focus on the mistakes. Focus on fixing them.
Easier said than done. There had been so many... Some Trance couldn't even remember. What if she missed one? What if something key to the future was done wrong again, and she couldn't fix it? She shuddered as she remembered the bloodcurdling screech of hungry magog...
"Stop," she ordered herself out loud, glaring at her reflection in the mirror. "Not then. Don't think of then. It hasn't happened yet. So STOP!"
She might have continued scolding herself if the chime on her door hadn't chosen that moment to ring. Wrapping the towel around herself, she stepped into the main area of her cabin. "Who is it?"
"Uh...Harper," came the engineer's wary voice through the comlink.
Trance couldn't help feeling a little thrill of happiness that he'd come to see her. "Come in."
The door opened and Harper stepped in. For a moment, Trance couldn't speak. It had been so long... "Hello, Harper," she said when she'd recovered her voice. "Can I help you?"
Harper's eyes bugged out of his head when he saw her towel, and he quickly turned so that his back was to her. "Uh, heya, Trance. Did I come at a, uh, a bad time or something? Not that seeing you in a towel isn't something that any hot-blooded male of any species wouldn't consider a dream come true, but you know."
He was babbling, just like she remembered. It made her smile. "You can turn around, Harper. You can't see anything, right? Nothing unmentionable at least." She sat down on the edge of her bed. "Did you need something?"
Harper turned around again, still looking uncomfortable. He ran a nervous hand through his hair. "Um... Not need. I just wanted..." He sighed. "I wanted to say thanks. You know, for saving my life and everything." Rubbing his belly, he winced. "I keep thinking about what those little bastards would've felt like, clawing out of me..." He shuddered.
Trance inclined her head toward him. "You're welcome." She watched him for a moment, then added, "You wouldn't have felt it."
Harper looked at her. "Felt what?"
"The magog hatching."
"Trance, babe, I don't think that's something I'd be likely to miss, if you catch my drift."
She shook her head faintly, her eyes focused on him. "You would have been dead first. Tyr would have killed you."
That seemed to make the tension between them even thicker. Harper reflexively brought a hand to his throat, rubbing his neck as though to soothe a rope burn left by a hangman's noose. "Don't remind me, all right? Images of that guy dancing at my funeral are gonna haunt my nightmares enough without any help from you."
Trance looked down. "He wouldn't have danced at your funeral, Harper. None of us would have. We would have taken the larvae out of your belly, then placed you in a Commonwealth coffin and ejected you into space. There would have been argument about whether you'd prefer a space burial, or burial on Earth, and people would have screamed at each other for not finding out your preference before you died. And there would have been tears. Lots and lots of tears. From everyone."
There was silence for a moment as Trance studied the weave of her standardized Commonwealth carpet. Harper was the first to speak. "That's a pretty in-depth assessment," he said softly, his trademark quips absent.
Trance nodded.
"Did you read all that in the probabilities?"
She shook her head.
"Then how?"
Looking up, she found his eyes again. "Because in my future, we rescued Hohne. We let you die."
Harper swallowed. "You...did?"
Trance nodded slightly. "It was the logical thing to do. You were an engineer, but Hohne was a universal icon. His death would cause repercussions that we couldn't even begin to imagine. It was save you and endanger the Commonwealth, or kill you and move on with the mission." She looked away again, ashamed to feel tears in her eyes for the first time in many, many years. "So we chose. And that was our choice."
A moment later, she felt the bed tilt and turned to see Harper sitting next to her. "It wasn't your choice," he said softly. "It was mine. I made it, remember? I was the one who was going to destroy the tesseract machine."
Trance gazed into his eyes. She'd forgotten how kind they were. "It never felt like that to us," she murmured. "It always felt like we'd made the choice for you." She reached up and idly touched his cheek. "Beka never forgave herself." And neither did I, she added silently.
Harper watched her for a moment, then smiled. "The last time I saw you - the old you - you kissed me on the cheek," he said.
Trance smiled. "I remember."
"You never did that before. Did you...know I'd never see you again? The old you?"
Trance shook her head. "No. I woke up that morning and never imagined what would happen by nightfall."
"So...why did you do it?"
She smiled a little more. "Because I thought you needed it. And because I wanted to." She stroked his cheek. "In my future, the next time I saw you was when we killed you." She shook her head, her smile fading. "I'm glad my old self didn't have to see that. I'm glad... I could save you this time."
Harper took her hand from his cheek, squeezing it gently. "I'm glad you did, too." He smiled. "Guess I'll have to call you sparkly golden babe now, huh?"
Trance laughed softly, looking down at their joined hands. "That would probably be fitting, yes." She looked into his eyes again, able to enjoy his smile for the first time in years. "And I don't care what the probabilities think." She shook her head a little. "I don't know how there could be a perfect possible future that didn't include Seamus Zelazney Harper."
Harper grinned. "See, I could have told you that long ago, babe. Trust in the Harper. The Harper is good."
Trance laughed. She hadn't laughed - really laughed - in years. It felt good to work those muscles again. "I have to get dressed now," she told him. "After I do, can you show me to Hydroponics? I haven't been there in so long."
Harper nodded, grinning. "There's a rose bush there that's just begging for you to mess around with it." He started to stand, but she stopped him.
Trance smiled into his eyes. "And...before that. I've been wanting to do this for years."
Cupping his face between her hands, she pulled him closer and kissed him, long and slow, on the lips. Harper stiffened with surprise for a moment, then melted into the kiss, wrapping his arms around her waist and holding her loosely.
Trance moaned softly, enjoying the soft press of his lips against hers. She'd always imagined what his kiss would feel like, and she was pleased to discover she'd been right about everything. Soft and sweet, but not shy... Seamus.
After a long minute, they separated. Harper gaped at her, eyes wide. "That was..."
"Wow?" she finished for him, eyes sparkling.
Harper just nodded, dumbstruck.
Trance laughed softly. "Good. I haven't wowed someone in a long time." She stood, making her way to the bathroom again. "Wait here for me?"
Harper nodded quickly. "I'm not going ANYWHERE."
Trance grinned and stepped into the bathroom, where her clothes were waiting. Neither am I, she thought, closing the door and stripping off the towel. Trance Gemini, version 2.0, is here to stay.
THE END