Dr. Strangelouvre
Cause 6 -------
So Akane has nads. Whoda thought?
I'm guessing you're still trying to deal with this, so let me reassure you. It's more normal than you'd imagine, but it's scarier than you'd think. She looks normal, but that is the freaky part. A girl who grew up with testicles, you would imagine as so much more warped and hideous than someone like, oh say; Akane. The problem with a girl who has testicles is that they're so deceptive.
Testicular Feminization Syndrome (TF) is simply anatomical deceit.
Mind you, I've seen Akane naked before. Envious? Don't be. It happened the first day I met her, and three times since then, all of which happened regrettably and were followed up by painful consequence. Seeing naked girls can't be worth this. But from these incidences I can say trust me, she looks like a girl, head to toe. No odd extremities, no freaky other mutations. She looks like a girl. Hips, legs, belly, all normal. She even grew tits, for crying out loud. Ovaries aren't as easy to grow.
Blue skies, smiling at me. On my back here in the park, I'm thinking that chaos is so much easier to deal with when it's absolutely quiet. A bird is chirping now. Does it have testicles? Does it have ovaries? Does it need one but have the other? It doesn't matter. Those lucky peckers.
I don't know how long it's been since the fight. Strangelouvre walked away after telling me the news, every last gory detail. I really wonder if he hates me as much as I hate him, because I can tell he enjoyed informing me that everything I've been led to believe is a lie. So many things are becoming clear now. It's like Nabiki said, to look for things that aren't there.
Burns in your vision.
Look for what's not there, of course. In Akane's case it's things like tampons and maxi pads. I never found one while I was sneaking around in her room, and this is the reason. Why would Akane need those? She doesn't even have a uterus, and she doesn't go through periods, either. Shame, she looked so much like a normal girl. Too much.
I know it's not her fault that she developed testis as an embryo, and didn't realize it, but suddenly BOOM it's my problem. I am engaged to a girl with nads and no uterus. And there's nothing I can do about it. The deal is done, and according to our fathers, we're stuck with each other, regardless of what we really are.
All human beings are taken in 'as is' condition. We are Earth's race of used cars, just trying to sell ourselves to each other.
Here's a great, almost new model, with good mileage, pouty lips, long hair, fresh spark plugs, wonderful personality, cozy interior, and headlights that could blind you! Wow, Tendou! You convinced me! Thanks! Guess pop forgot to ask about what was under the hood.
Right now, inside my fiancé, where her ovaries should be, there are two pieces of human tissue screaming out;
"No! No! This can't be right! I'm a boy dammit! Not a girl! I am a boy!"
Oh, I know what you're thinking, and don't go there.
I was on my back, and she came over, she looked down at me. The fact that I didn't move after Strangelouvre talked to me had her worried. Her dress, her eyes, her face, her breasts, she had me completely fooled all this time.
"Are you alright, Ranma?"
Give her an Oscar.
I didn't move. I didn't speak. I just looked up at her. She crouches down, her hands on her knees.
"Ranma," She said that part sounding really concerned, then she went on "are you alright?"
All the landscape about Akane has been brightened.
And the brighter the landscape, the darker the outlook.
I lean back, and watch a cloud that is passing overhead, but Akane wasn't to be ignored. She leans over, and puts her whole head right in my way.
The rest of the story is that after her body couldn't receive the message that she was a boy, she became a girl. Her testicles got put where her ovaries should be. No one could find them, and so, no-one found out that she had testicles, until she turned 9. Her periods never started, even though she was obviously going through puberty. So a concerned Mr. Tendou brought her in to Dr. Tofu and he recommended a SPECIAL doctor; guess who? Akane would later tell me that the worst part of the whole ordeal those days was the surgery. When you have TF you don't get a uterus, and there's a huge slab of tissue right where your vagina should be. You are, in fact only about 1 inch deep. Dr. Strangelouvre carved out Akane's vagina with his own two hands. All in a days work. This is why she didn't want me to fight him, this is the secret I wasn't supposed to find out. After the vaginal extension operation, Dr. Strangelouvre said he had to take Akane's testis out, but Akane wouldn't allow it. One surgery was enough. Hands off. So her balls got left in. This has been a Tendou family secret for 7 years. Dr. Strangelouvre was the only other person who knew.
Just to dispel your fears, I guess I'd better tell you that they are fine. Both Kasumi and Nabiki are fine. They are, I've been since told, perfectly normal girls. They each are really, really, no lie girls. Akane is the only son.
Just look at her look at me. Right in my face. "Ranma, are you all right!?"
I'm fine...How do you feel?
"Ranma," she said "You guys were talking for a long time after the fight. Did...He..."
Right now my biological level is talking like Akane. Die. Dry up and die. Die. Die. Die.
It'd be the mercy killing of a youth in Asia.
My head leans to the left, so I don't have to look in her eyes. The Tom-boy, emphasis on boy. When you think about it, everything about Akane makes sense, after you convince yourself that she has huevos. Really, think about it. The martial arts, the attitude, the boy-hating, the roar. Girls don't roar like her, and neither do guys, only Akane.
I am Akane, hear me roar.
Miss testy who missed testosterone.
Most leading experts in the study of testicular feminization agree that there is no valid link between TF and unusually masculine behavior.
To those experts, I say that there is someone I'd like you to meet.
I'm not looking at her when I tell her that the Doc told me everything. He told me about the testicles, the TFM mutation, the surgery, the secret, the bright, bright landscape of Akane. I'm not looking at her when she pulls back, landing on her ass in shock and alarm.
I'm not looking at her when she says "He...He told you? What did he tell you?"
You already know. She probably knows too, he told me all of it. The only reason he told me anything was because I asked. I wanted to know, and he told me everything there was to know.
I didn't want to look at her, but she grabbed me by the collar and jammed her weepy-eyed face right into my face. Those big eyes, puddles of tears forming in the corners. The sniffle in her nose, and that rasp of anger in her voice.
"How could you?" She stands up, and drags me to my knees "It's none of your business!" Now they start falling, tears streaming down her cheeks. Her eyes close, but that doesn't stop them. I'm so stupid, you don't do something this dumb.
Like an idiot, I want to console her, so I say, so you have a disorder, talk about that. It's OK, really, talk about it. Her eyes open, then tighten to a squint of anger, her teeth clench. I am so incredibly stupid; cause.
"Talk about it?" She screams, "Talk about it?"
In my dream, I can sense the house burning down around me. It feels like this.
"Damn you!"
She decks me in the nose, which immediately starts to pour out red as I fall; effect. See how it works? The whole world works like this. I'm on my back again, only now I'm bleeding. This has been a pretty emotional two days; if you ask me. I wonder what would have happened if she fell into the cursed spring instead of me. Maybe we'd both be closer to normal.
"Shut up," she says. She reaches into her pocket, and pulls out a pile of tissues. She throws half at me, the other half she presses to her eyes, and nose, and she left me there. I wad up some of the tissues and jam them into my nose. The blood trickles down the back of my sinuses and soon I can start to swallow it, as I look up into the sky. My hunger gets the better of me, and I reach over for a loaf of the French bread that the doctor broke. I reach up, dust it of, and break myself off a piece.
She's such a bitch, I tell myself between chews. I swallow the bread, and pop in another shred. She's uncute too, I say that while trying to keep the food suspended in my mouth so I don't choke. Swallow, eat, repeat. Plus, she's not even supposed to be a-and the bolus of food drops down my throat, and I'm forced to my knees, as I gag it up. I was coughing when I heard her.
"Why Ranma, darling, are you all right?"
Kodachi, great. Just what I needed. I wonder why Kodachi was here to begin with. Kodachi said that Dr. Strangelouvre convinced her to come after she met him in the library. She told me that she originally didn't want to come, because she was sure I would have won the fight, but after Dr. Strangelouvre said that he would use French-bread-fuu, she wasn't so certain.
"I was hoping, darling, that after I didn't show up, The good doctor would be defeated, and all his gloating and attempts to impress me would be for naught. The man teaches me his tongue, and I'd prefer our relationship to be left at that, unlike him. So I left his defeat, and my victory up to you, Ranma, darling. Surely I have enough confidence in you, my love, that I needn't have shown up to encourage your victory."
Why can't Akane think like that, I wonder.
"However, Ranma dear, one who has never fought in the style of French-bread-fuu, is almost assured to loose to a master such as Strangelouvre. Oh, How tragic that I should live to see the day upon which my Herculean champion be felled by a lowly baked good."
Some would call this sympathizing, some would call it pity, I call it rubbing my nose in it. I'm getting the hell out of here, so I get up to leave.
"Ranma, wait." she pleads "I want you to come to my home, tomorrow, at sunset." She's bending over, to pick up one of the broken loaves. I don't want to see her, I don't want her pity, and I don't want to visit her house.
"But I know what you do want." She said. That got my attention, so I turned to face her. She had taken up the single black rose from the pocket of her shirt. She placed it under her nose, and took a single sniff.
"I know what you want, and I can give it to you."
She tossed the rose in the air, and when the bloom reached the apex of its rise, she jumped up at it. With one swing of the bread, the whole rose blasted apart. I stood there, with black rose petals falling all around me. I knew what Kodachi wanted. She wanted me.
"I want you, darling." Like I said "I want you to learn French-bread-fuu. I want you to defeat Dr. Strangelouvre for me. I want you to meet me tomorrow, at sunset."
Faust sold his soul to the devil, in order to gain all the wisdom in the world. Me? I think I've just cut a much sweeter deal. Kodachi took out her ribbon, from wherever she keeps it, and in a vertigo of flower-petals and nylon, she disappeared from my sight.
I want to learn French-bread-fuu. I want to defeat Dr. Strangelouvre. I want Ryoga begging for mercy. I want Victory.
I take the tissues out. They've been sculpted into perfect molds of my nostrils, and have held their shape thanks to my mucus and crusted blood.
But most of all;
I don't want Akane.
--------------------
Notes: I feel this chapter is a little rushed and a little short, I put it out, really just to dispel confusion about Akane's condition. I wrote a paper that included a whole segment on TF, and ever since then, whenever I thought Akane, I thought Testicular Feminization. Akane isn't a hermaphrodite, and I am not Oscar.
If you meet a girl with TF, you won't know it unless she tells you. If that statement isn't correct then my paper deserved a D-. Other Sexual development disorders, like hermaphroditism, and turner's syndrome are pretty obvious to the naked eye, even on a fully clothed subject. I just wanted to throw in a plausible twist to the Ranma universe.
In case you don't think you can cope with my unsettling plot, you should know ahead of time; You're reading the work of a guy who likes reading Chuck Palahniuk, Franz Kafka, and the New Testament. I'm all about twisted twists, so they'll keep on coming. I like writing about people turning on society, society turning on people, and believing there is a God who made absolutely EVERYTHING, even quasars and yet, he still loves us and our tiny little world enough to be tortured to death for us and it. This is who you're dealing with, so hang
A 14 rivers production.
Cause 6 -------
So Akane has nads. Whoda thought?
I'm guessing you're still trying to deal with this, so let me reassure you. It's more normal than you'd imagine, but it's scarier than you'd think. She looks normal, but that is the freaky part. A girl who grew up with testicles, you would imagine as so much more warped and hideous than someone like, oh say; Akane. The problem with a girl who has testicles is that they're so deceptive.
Testicular Feminization Syndrome (TF) is simply anatomical deceit.
Mind you, I've seen Akane naked before. Envious? Don't be. It happened the first day I met her, and three times since then, all of which happened regrettably and were followed up by painful consequence. Seeing naked girls can't be worth this. But from these incidences I can say trust me, she looks like a girl, head to toe. No odd extremities, no freaky other mutations. She looks like a girl. Hips, legs, belly, all normal. She even grew tits, for crying out loud. Ovaries aren't as easy to grow.
Blue skies, smiling at me. On my back here in the park, I'm thinking that chaos is so much easier to deal with when it's absolutely quiet. A bird is chirping now. Does it have testicles? Does it have ovaries? Does it need one but have the other? It doesn't matter. Those lucky peckers.
I don't know how long it's been since the fight. Strangelouvre walked away after telling me the news, every last gory detail. I really wonder if he hates me as much as I hate him, because I can tell he enjoyed informing me that everything I've been led to believe is a lie. So many things are becoming clear now. It's like Nabiki said, to look for things that aren't there.
Burns in your vision.
Look for what's not there, of course. In Akane's case it's things like tampons and maxi pads. I never found one while I was sneaking around in her room, and this is the reason. Why would Akane need those? She doesn't even have a uterus, and she doesn't go through periods, either. Shame, she looked so much like a normal girl. Too much.
I know it's not her fault that she developed testis as an embryo, and didn't realize it, but suddenly BOOM it's my problem. I am engaged to a girl with nads and no uterus. And there's nothing I can do about it. The deal is done, and according to our fathers, we're stuck with each other, regardless of what we really are.
All human beings are taken in 'as is' condition. We are Earth's race of used cars, just trying to sell ourselves to each other.
Here's a great, almost new model, with good mileage, pouty lips, long hair, fresh spark plugs, wonderful personality, cozy interior, and headlights that could blind you! Wow, Tendou! You convinced me! Thanks! Guess pop forgot to ask about what was under the hood.
Right now, inside my fiancé, where her ovaries should be, there are two pieces of human tissue screaming out;
"No! No! This can't be right! I'm a boy dammit! Not a girl! I am a boy!"
Oh, I know what you're thinking, and don't go there.
I was on my back, and she came over, she looked down at me. The fact that I didn't move after Strangelouvre talked to me had her worried. Her dress, her eyes, her face, her breasts, she had me completely fooled all this time.
"Are you alright, Ranma?"
Give her an Oscar.
I didn't move. I didn't speak. I just looked up at her. She crouches down, her hands on her knees.
"Ranma," She said that part sounding really concerned, then she went on "are you alright?"
All the landscape about Akane has been brightened.
And the brighter the landscape, the darker the outlook.
I lean back, and watch a cloud that is passing overhead, but Akane wasn't to be ignored. She leans over, and puts her whole head right in my way.
The rest of the story is that after her body couldn't receive the message that she was a boy, she became a girl. Her testicles got put where her ovaries should be. No one could find them, and so, no-one found out that she had testicles, until she turned 9. Her periods never started, even though she was obviously going through puberty. So a concerned Mr. Tendou brought her in to Dr. Tofu and he recommended a SPECIAL doctor; guess who? Akane would later tell me that the worst part of the whole ordeal those days was the surgery. When you have TF you don't get a uterus, and there's a huge slab of tissue right where your vagina should be. You are, in fact only about 1 inch deep. Dr. Strangelouvre carved out Akane's vagina with his own two hands. All in a days work. This is why she didn't want me to fight him, this is the secret I wasn't supposed to find out. After the vaginal extension operation, Dr. Strangelouvre said he had to take Akane's testis out, but Akane wouldn't allow it. One surgery was enough. Hands off. So her balls got left in. This has been a Tendou family secret for 7 years. Dr. Strangelouvre was the only other person who knew.
Just to dispel your fears, I guess I'd better tell you that they are fine. Both Kasumi and Nabiki are fine. They are, I've been since told, perfectly normal girls. They each are really, really, no lie girls. Akane is the only son.
Just look at her look at me. Right in my face. "Ranma, are you all right!?"
I'm fine...How do you feel?
"Ranma," she said "You guys were talking for a long time after the fight. Did...He..."
Right now my biological level is talking like Akane. Die. Dry up and die. Die. Die. Die.
It'd be the mercy killing of a youth in Asia.
My head leans to the left, so I don't have to look in her eyes. The Tom-boy, emphasis on boy. When you think about it, everything about Akane makes sense, after you convince yourself that she has huevos. Really, think about it. The martial arts, the attitude, the boy-hating, the roar. Girls don't roar like her, and neither do guys, only Akane.
I am Akane, hear me roar.
Miss testy who missed testosterone.
Most leading experts in the study of testicular feminization agree that there is no valid link between TF and unusually masculine behavior.
To those experts, I say that there is someone I'd like you to meet.
I'm not looking at her when I tell her that the Doc told me everything. He told me about the testicles, the TFM mutation, the surgery, the secret, the bright, bright landscape of Akane. I'm not looking at her when she pulls back, landing on her ass in shock and alarm.
I'm not looking at her when she says "He...He told you? What did he tell you?"
You already know. She probably knows too, he told me all of it. The only reason he told me anything was because I asked. I wanted to know, and he told me everything there was to know.
I didn't want to look at her, but she grabbed me by the collar and jammed her weepy-eyed face right into my face. Those big eyes, puddles of tears forming in the corners. The sniffle in her nose, and that rasp of anger in her voice.
"How could you?" She stands up, and drags me to my knees "It's none of your business!" Now they start falling, tears streaming down her cheeks. Her eyes close, but that doesn't stop them. I'm so stupid, you don't do something this dumb.
Like an idiot, I want to console her, so I say, so you have a disorder, talk about that. It's OK, really, talk about it. Her eyes open, then tighten to a squint of anger, her teeth clench. I am so incredibly stupid; cause.
"Talk about it?" She screams, "Talk about it?"
In my dream, I can sense the house burning down around me. It feels like this.
"Damn you!"
She decks me in the nose, which immediately starts to pour out red as I fall; effect. See how it works? The whole world works like this. I'm on my back again, only now I'm bleeding. This has been a pretty emotional two days; if you ask me. I wonder what would have happened if she fell into the cursed spring instead of me. Maybe we'd both be closer to normal.
"Shut up," she says. She reaches into her pocket, and pulls out a pile of tissues. She throws half at me, the other half she presses to her eyes, and nose, and she left me there. I wad up some of the tissues and jam them into my nose. The blood trickles down the back of my sinuses and soon I can start to swallow it, as I look up into the sky. My hunger gets the better of me, and I reach over for a loaf of the French bread that the doctor broke. I reach up, dust it of, and break myself off a piece.
She's such a bitch, I tell myself between chews. I swallow the bread, and pop in another shred. She's uncute too, I say that while trying to keep the food suspended in my mouth so I don't choke. Swallow, eat, repeat. Plus, she's not even supposed to be a-and the bolus of food drops down my throat, and I'm forced to my knees, as I gag it up. I was coughing when I heard her.
"Why Ranma, darling, are you all right?"
Kodachi, great. Just what I needed. I wonder why Kodachi was here to begin with. Kodachi said that Dr. Strangelouvre convinced her to come after she met him in the library. She told me that she originally didn't want to come, because she was sure I would have won the fight, but after Dr. Strangelouvre said that he would use French-bread-fuu, she wasn't so certain.
"I was hoping, darling, that after I didn't show up, The good doctor would be defeated, and all his gloating and attempts to impress me would be for naught. The man teaches me his tongue, and I'd prefer our relationship to be left at that, unlike him. So I left his defeat, and my victory up to you, Ranma, darling. Surely I have enough confidence in you, my love, that I needn't have shown up to encourage your victory."
Why can't Akane think like that, I wonder.
"However, Ranma dear, one who has never fought in the style of French-bread-fuu, is almost assured to loose to a master such as Strangelouvre. Oh, How tragic that I should live to see the day upon which my Herculean champion be felled by a lowly baked good."
Some would call this sympathizing, some would call it pity, I call it rubbing my nose in it. I'm getting the hell out of here, so I get up to leave.
"Ranma, wait." she pleads "I want you to come to my home, tomorrow, at sunset." She's bending over, to pick up one of the broken loaves. I don't want to see her, I don't want her pity, and I don't want to visit her house.
"But I know what you do want." She said. That got my attention, so I turned to face her. She had taken up the single black rose from the pocket of her shirt. She placed it under her nose, and took a single sniff.
"I know what you want, and I can give it to you."
She tossed the rose in the air, and when the bloom reached the apex of its rise, she jumped up at it. With one swing of the bread, the whole rose blasted apart. I stood there, with black rose petals falling all around me. I knew what Kodachi wanted. She wanted me.
"I want you, darling." Like I said "I want you to learn French-bread-fuu. I want you to defeat Dr. Strangelouvre for me. I want you to meet me tomorrow, at sunset."
Faust sold his soul to the devil, in order to gain all the wisdom in the world. Me? I think I've just cut a much sweeter deal. Kodachi took out her ribbon, from wherever she keeps it, and in a vertigo of flower-petals and nylon, she disappeared from my sight.
I want to learn French-bread-fuu. I want to defeat Dr. Strangelouvre. I want Ryoga begging for mercy. I want Victory.
I take the tissues out. They've been sculpted into perfect molds of my nostrils, and have held their shape thanks to my mucus and crusted blood.
But most of all;
I don't want Akane.
--------------------
Notes: I feel this chapter is a little rushed and a little short, I put it out, really just to dispel confusion about Akane's condition. I wrote a paper that included a whole segment on TF, and ever since then, whenever I thought Akane, I thought Testicular Feminization. Akane isn't a hermaphrodite, and I am not Oscar.
If you meet a girl with TF, you won't know it unless she tells you. If that statement isn't correct then my paper deserved a D-. Other Sexual development disorders, like hermaphroditism, and turner's syndrome are pretty obvious to the naked eye, even on a fully clothed subject. I just wanted to throw in a plausible twist to the Ranma universe.
In case you don't think you can cope with my unsettling plot, you should know ahead of time; You're reading the work of a guy who likes reading Chuck Palahniuk, Franz Kafka, and the New Testament. I'm all about twisted twists, so they'll keep on coming. I like writing about people turning on society, society turning on people, and believing there is a God who made absolutely EVERYTHING, even quasars and yet, he still loves us and our tiny little world enough to be tortured to death for us and it. This is who you're dealing with, so hang
A 14 rivers production.