CHAPTER 6

The California sun blazed down on Josh, CJ, and Donna as they made their way down the rich, suburban streets toward Evergreen Cemetery. Since they weren't on government business and were only staying a night, they didn't have a car. Donna pushed CJ's wheelchair down the sidewalk. Josh looked around at the mansions all around them. His family was pretty wealthy but they were old New England wealth like the Bartlets. This place where Sam had grown up was all modern glamour.

They had gone to visit Sam's mother after they got off the plane. She'd been glad to see them, especially Josh whom she'd known for over fifteen years. They'd all sat and talked for an hour or so. Mrs. Seaborn had invited them to stay for the night. At first Josh had refused but then CJ reminded him that they hadn't made hotel reservations so they accepted. CJ thought this was amazingly generous of a woman who had only met CJ and Donna once at the memorial service a few months back.

The cemetery was about a mile away from her house. She'd offered them a ride but they refused. After the long plane ride Josh and Donna wanted to stretch their legs. CJ had said nothing about this but she looked sad. On their way down they'd stopped at a grocery store and bought some flowers. None of them had any idea what kind of flower, if any, Sam liked so Donna picked out a tasteful little bouquet of carnations.

The cemetery was enormous. Sam's mother had given them directions to his stone but it still took them twenty minutes to find. The fact that Josh was leading the quest didn't help matters. Finally they reached a medium sized white marble stone with a Celtic cross carved above the inscription.

Samuel Norman Seaborn

1965-2003

Loving Son, Loyal Friend, Brilliant Scribe

Donna set the flowers down beside a toy boat. The tears in her eyes blurred the inscription. CJ had a hand over her face as she wept silently. Josh was trying not to cry. He was supposed to be tough. He knew it was a sexist thought but he was the man here. Then Donna turned to him. Her eyes were full of sorrow but there was also concern there. Concern for Josh. It's all right, she was saying silently. You can cry. We won't judge you.

That was all it took. He broke down, groping blindly for her. She caught him and pulled him close, holding him as he sobbed against her shoulder. He'd told himself the whole flight that he wouldn't do this. He would be strong for them. But now he was the most vulnerable and it didn't matter. His brain was crowded with memories of Sam. Meeting him on that double-date. Sam and Lisa, Josh and some girl named Erin. Erin and Laurie were in a class together, Josh and Erin interned together. Erin had needed a date and asked Josh. All the relationships from that night had faded except for his and Sam's newfound friendship. Bringing Sam onto the Bartlet campaign. Those years working together. That last night at the State of the Union when Sam had slipped him his seat number. What would Josh have done if he'd known it would be the last time he saw his best friend?

He felt CJ's arms around him too. He was practically on her lap. That was too humiliating. He took deep breaths and forced himself to stop. It was an impossible task. All he wanted was Sam. He wanted his friend back. What was so special about Josh that he had to survive?

It was starting to get dark. "We should go back soon." Donna said, her voice shaky.

The other two agreed but they knew they couldn't face Sam's mother looking like this. They sat in front of his grave for a few more minutes. CJ had some tissues in her bag which they used to clean themselves up the best they could. Finally they got up and walked silently toward the gates.

Mrs. Seaborn had made cocoa. CJ wanted to hug the woman. She sat with them while they drank it, keeping a close eye on Josh. His hands shook as he held his mug.

"I was trying to figure out where to put you all." Mrs. Seaborn said, "I have a couple guest rooms but they're both a mess. If you want, you girls can take my room and I'll take the pull-out couch."

"Absolutely not." Said CJ, wide-eyed, "We've put you out enough, ma'am. We'll take the couch."

Mrs. Seaborn argued but CJ and Donna insisted. Finally she relented and turned to Josh. "Dear, if you want to..."

Josh knew what she meant. If he wanted to he could spend the night in Sam's room. He nodded.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

That night Josh sat alone on the bed Sam had slept until he was nineteen. The room was large with posters and photographs on the walls. The posters were from classic movies and Gilbert and Sullivan operas. Among the many framed photos were Sam's high school graduation, his law school graduation, him and his mother when he was about seven, several children who had to be cousins, and Sam and Josh. Josh was surprised to see that picture. He and Sam had met after Sam had moved out of his parents' house. But then he remembered. Mrs. Seaborn had taken that picture in 1988 when Josh had come to their Fourth of July party. She must've hung it there.

He got up and studied the picture more closely. Josh and Sam sat by the pool, Sam in swim trunks, Josh in shorts and a concert tee-shirt. They were sitting on the edge of a lounge chair. Sam hammed it up for the camera as Josh laughed.

They had been twenty-three and twenty-six when that picture was taken. Sam had looked exactly the same on the night he died. Josh knew he didn't. There were more lines on his face now and the ones that had been there were more deeply etched. He looked wearier now. He was wearier now. Even before the explosion, though that had definitely speeded up the process. He wondered how Sam had looked so young. Did he have some kind of Dorian Gray deal going on?

Josh laughed at himself. If he was thinking like that, it was seriously time to get some sleep. But being in Sam's room, surrounded by his things, made Josh feel closer to him and he didn't want to give that up just yet.

Besides the bed, the room contained a dresser, a bookshelf overflowing with books, a desk (immaculate, of course) and a closet. Josh looked in the closet briefly, then closed the door knowing that Sam would be mortified that Josh had seen his 80s high school wardrobe. Then he went to the bookshelf and ran his finger along the rows of books. He laughed again when he found the complete works of Oscar Wilde among them.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

After she got the girls settled in the living room, Mrs. Seaborn went to make sure Josh was all right. She went up to the room that's permanent emptiness she'd finally come to terms with, and knocked. When Josh didn't answer, she opened it a crack and peered in.

He jolted up as the door creaked. "I'm sorry." She whispered, "I was just checking to see if you were alright."

"Yes." He said, "Thank you so much for letting us stay. I wasn't looking forward to a hotel, but you didn't have to do this."

She smiled and edged into the room. "It's not a problem." She said, "I just wish you'd come more often."

"Me too. But we've been really busy."

"Of course, rebuilding everything. It must be crazy."

"Yeah."

"I'm proud of you, Josh." She said. He looked up at her with surprise. She smiled. "You were always my favorite of those new college friends Sam brought home. You've come a long way. White House Chief of Staff."

He didn't know what to say. "I miss my son every day." Mrs. Seaborn continued. "Everything reminds me of him. I can't watch the news without breaking down. But as much as it hurts, I remember that he was doing what he loved. He was trying to save the world."

Her voice caught. "You've been given that opportunity." She said, "Please, try to do it for him."

Josh nodded. His throat felt like there was a rock lodged in it. Mrs. Seaborn wiped her eyes, then leaned over and kissed him on the top of his head as if he were a little boy and not one of the most powerful men in the world.

TBC...

A/N: Semi-amusing story. I wrote chapter 5 through the end while I was on vacation. I collect postcards of vintage bands, movie scenes, and actors. HMV used to sell them but the store near my house shut down. Luckily a drugstore near where I was staying sold them so I spent a lot of time there. I was looking through them and among the Beatles, Ghostbusters, Gomez Addamses, and Stings, I found a picture of 1980 something Rob Lowe. Though I wrote the description of the photo Josh was looking at the night before I bought the card, it serves as a nice little prop. Yeah, just thought that was cool. I'll get back to writing now.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

WhiteCamillia – Yeah, Jason Isaacs was Lucius Malfoy. Just the coolest. And I think the spoilers were on the West Wing episode guide. At least some of them. I think what I did was type in something like "West Wing spoilers" on Google and see what I got. Try it.

Lexi Lyman – You know, I meant Lisa when I wrote Laurie. Guess that name would change just a bit. And by the way, noos etadpu.

Demonicamazon – Okay, I was thinking he was in his 60s or something. That would just a be a little gross. When you say someone returning, do you mean a writer or a cast member?

Bartlegg – Yeah, it's a shame we can't use little symbols anymore. I wonder why. And I think that was my favorite chapter too. I was pretty well rested and ready to write when I did that one.

Laurie Beth – I was trying to make Fryer a little more human with that scene. You're right, he did need some taking down a bit. Glad you liked it.

Virgil-t-stone – Josh has got to be one of the best characters on TV right now. He's just got so many facets to him. He's so fun to write.

Shadowesque13 – I never saw it coming either. I had the whole story outlined and ready to write, then when I started chapter 5 I thought, "I should have them go to California." So I mushed chapters 3 and 4 together and made the trip its own chapter. Hence, this one. And I got lucky. My school play tryouts were on the same night as Abu El Banat so I missed it. I'll probably watch it though, when Season 5 comes on this week!