CHAPTER FOUR

Shayera awoke slowly and painfully, the light hurting her eyes, well eye. For some reason she could only open one. She closed it with a hiss, then forced it open, waiting for it to adjust to the light before trying to focus on anything. The first thing she did focus on was the handsome black man sitting next to her bed, reading. She spent a few minutes studying the face she had longed to see for so long. It looked a little different, shaved completely bald with a new beard and mustache. Shayera couldn't decide if she liked the new facial hair or hated it.

"Hey." She whispered, catching John's attention as she sat up, wincing when she put weight on her wrist, which J'onn had set and put in a cast.

"Hey yourself." John whispered, putting his book aside and leaning forward to talk to her. "You should be sleeping."

"I'm not tired." Shayera said immediately, then laughed quietly.

"What?"

"Haven't we had this conversation before?" Shayera asked with a small grin, tilting her head. John laughed as well.

Shayera suddenly turned serious and looked away.

"What is it Shy?" John asked, reaching out and touching her arm, making sure he avoided the bandage that covered the cut on her arm.

"We need to talk, John. Really."

"Yes we do." John said. He stood up from his chair and sat down on the bed next to her. "Why didn't you tell me Shayera?"

"It was too soon John. The pain, the betrayal, was too new." Shayera whispered, hanging her head, letting her dark red hair fall over her shoulder and hide her face from him, hide her pain from the world. She took a deep, shaky breath then went on.

"I knew you hated me, but I knew you loved kids and wanted some someday. I figured if you never knew about our two, then you wouldn't. . ." She trailed off, unable to continue.

"I wouldn't what Shy?" John whispered, reaching out and touched her chin, pushing her head up so that he could see her eyes.

"You wouldn't hate them." Shayera finished in a whisper, her eyes tearing up. But Shayera wouldn't let the tears fall.

"Shayera." John said, his voice a demand. Shayera reluctantly lifted her eyes to meet his, dreading the anger and hatred she would see there. But to her surprise, Shayera didn't see any of those things. Instead there was pain and something else that Shayera was sure she would never see in those deep chocolate brown eyes of his.

Love.

What Shayera saw in John's eyes was love, love for her and her children, their children, and pain. Not pain caused by her secret, but the pain that was echoed in her own heart. The pain of having your children stolen.

"Shy, I have always loved you. I never hated you, and I would never hate our children. I have been in love with you ever since I saw you come flying at the jet to save me when we went back in time. The entire time we were being attacked by the Thanagarians, I loved you. And when I watched you fly away from me, I loved you. I cried for you every night, laying there alone in my apartment, wondering if you were okay, if you were safe, praying that no one would recognize you." John reached out and pulled Shayera into his arms.

Shayera sighed and rested her head on his shoulder, turning it ever so slightly so that she could hide from the world, and the pain it caused, in his warmth and strength.

"Aw, it's a Kodak moment. And me without my camera." A soft voice gently teased from the doorway. Shayera pulled away from John's embrace with a laugh when she recognized the voice.

"Nick! What are you doing here?"

"What do ya think? I get a call from Brucey Boy saying that he has a unconscious, winged, outlaw alien injured on his doorstep wearing a bracelet that he is sure is my handiwork, would I know anything about that?" Nick winked at Shayera. "What was I supposed to do, deny it? Sara, and then you, would have taken my head off."

"I would have gotten it first. I have a weapon."

"But Sara's got you beat on agility." Nick pointed out.

He grinned and came into the room, a duffel bag of Shayera's swinging from his hand. He swung it up on the bed, then enfolded Shayera into a tight hug.

"How you holding up sweetie? You going to be okay?"

"I'll be okay once I get my babies back." Shayera whispered back. Nick turned his head and gave Shayera a kiss on the temple.

"Stay strong kid. You'll find them. I have complete confidence in you."

"Thank you Nick."

"Anytime babe." Nick pulled back just a little and winked at her. "You know I love you, right?"

"I know. I love you too Nick."

"Good. Now," Nick motioned the bag at the foot of the bed, "I come bearing gifts."

"What kind of gifts?" Shayera asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Okay so it's not gifts. But it's just as good."

"Chocolate?"

"What is it with women and chocolate? No, it's not that. It's just some clothes, and some other stuff from your rooms."

"Oh really?" Shayera's eyebrow arched higher, if that was even possible. "Who packed?"

"Sara?" Nick asked, trying to look innocent.

"Oh really?" Shayera repeated.

"Ok, she packed your 'unmentionables'." Nick confessed, holding up his hands.

"Hmm."

"Really! I wasn't even in the room!"

"Hmm."

"Okay so I was in the room. But I didn't look!"

"Hmm."

"Okay so I looked. But I didn't touch, swear to god. Sara would have murdered me right then and there."

"And delivered you to me as an early Christmas gift." Shayera agreed with a grin.

"Most definitely. And now, on to more serious matters. Let me see your wings." Nick said seriously.

"When did you become a doctor?"

"Never. But I have taken care of you before. I think I'm safe in saying I'm the only one qualified."

"True." Shayera agreed. She pulled her shirt up and over her head, keeping it on her arms and holding it in front of her. John sucked in his breath when he saw the white bandages wrapped around her stomach.

Shayera turned her back toward Nick, facing John, and switched off her bracelet. J'onn had suggested keeping it turned on, once Diana had informed them of it's presence, so as not to cause Shayera too much pain. But now all that pain came flooding back as her broken and bloody wings appeared. John saw the pain on Shayera's face and took her uninjured hand. She smiled at him gratefully and gripped it tightly.

Nick moved behind her and started looking at the wings, feeling for the joints that connected them to her back, his hands cold on Shayera's bare skin. She jumped at least a foot.

"Damn it Nick! Your hands are ice cold!" She hissed at him. He laughed quietly.

"Sorry Shay." His hands moved up her wings and Shayera cried out before she could stop herself.

"That hurts." She said through gritted teeth.

"I know kid I know. I'm sorry."

"Just hurry." She whispered, tears coming to her eyes. She was close to breaking John's hand, but there was no way he was letting go.

"Shayera?"

"What Nick."

"I need you to take a deep breath and hold it. Your wings have been dislocated. I have to pop them back in before being able to see how much they might be damaged. Hold on to something." Nick advised.

"Alright." Shayera reached for John with her other hand, the one with the cast. He took it and held it as tightly as he dared. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. Nick made two quick movement behind her back and Shayera's eyes shot open as she screamed. Then her eyes rolled up in her head and she fell forward into John's arms.

"SHAYERA!"