Heyyy! I now own Inuyasha! mwhahaha! (Sighs) No, unfortunately I don't but I own this story though!
Mind if I have alot of typos, I'm using my blased notepad...grr my microsoft wordpad keeps freezing on me... Oh well I guess this would have to do until I actually get some things fixed. I'm going to re-write this in the future so don't flame because of my misuse of puncuations and spelling.
I got the idea when I was listening to Blink182 "First Date"It's totally opposite from the song, so I wouldn't say its based on the it..just the word date gave me the idea :P So I figured, "Hey! Why not make Kikyo Inuyashas blind date and make her some pshyco who thinks inuyasha is a demon?"
And yes, Yasha is human in this story.
Summary: (AU)Miroku sets human Inuyasha on a blind date with none other then Kikyo. Seems like 'Yashas got his hands full when kikyo thinks hes a demon and tries to purify him.
THIS WILL NOT BE KIKYO/INUYASHA!
This is just a short humor.
ENJOY!
It was one of those nice days in Kyoto, Japan. The snow had just stopped falling and in front of a large brick house stood two people- a male and female. They were chatting away until...
SLAP
"Miroku!"
"I'm sorry Sango! It's just your so alurring, my hands couldn't control themselves."
The one named Sango crossed her arms to herself. She stood at a tall 5'6 with long black hair which was tied up into a high ponytail.
"Sure, they couldn't control themselves." She said rolling her eyes.
"And plus, you were pratically telling me to grope you!"
"And how is that???"
"You were bending for me."
"...Wha-What? I was picking up my keys you lech!!!"
"Riiiight, and did you have to-"
"GAHHH!" Suddenly A black haired male growled while pushing Miroku to the side.
Miroku winced, his violet eyes churned over to his best friend who had waltsed passed him and into the house.
"What? No hi, Yasha?" Miroku called out but Inuyasha hadn't heard him due to the door slamming shut behind him. He hadn't heard his comment.
Sango scoffed while breaking the silence between her and Miroku. "What crawled up Inuyashas butt and died?"
"I don't know, but whatever crawled up his butt is bound to be killed. I mean have you ever heard him fart after taco night?"
"Miroku!" Sango laughed, "Thats one information I did not need to know! And thats not what I mean. I was speaking theoretically. Duh."
"Oh...Well just in case." Miroku said with a wink.
"Yeah, thanks for the warning. Anyways shouldn't you see how he is doing?"
"I'd rather have my bones in place thank you very much!"
Sango sighed, "Just go talk to him, I have to meet my friend at the airport."
"Ahh, is she pretty?"
"Don't even think about it!"
"I wasn't. I was just asking but since you put it that way." Miroku said with a another wink. Sango just rolled her eyes again, "I'm not gonna let her meet you at all."
"Ah I see, is it because she might fall madly in love with me?" He asked childishly, clasping his hands together "And all your going to say is "Oh dear me! My beloved Miroku is dating my friend! I should have admitted my feelings for him when i had the chance!"He mimiked in a girl voice and once again continued, "Oh Miroku!-"
Sango blushed, "I get the point already!" She looked away, "Just go talk to Inuyasha, I really have to go." With that she left leaving a very amused Miroku behind. But not before she returned to Miroku. The violet eyed male blinked in confusion then suddenly felt a pang of pain run up his shin.
"By the way, I do NOT sound like that!" With that the female left leaving a very amused man behind.
'Yep! She so loves me, heh heh'
"Hey Yasha!" Miroku called out as he entered the doors. It had taken him a few minutes to feel his leg after Sango had brutally kick it.. He walked into the kitchen to see his roomate sitting on the counter.
"Whats up with you?"
"Kagura dumped me." He said simply.
(Needed a Character, stick with me people!)
"But I thought that you two were madly in love?"
"Keh."
"Hey I know!"
"What?"
"I know this girl Kikyo, she is very pretty and very funny. How about you go on a date with her just to make Kagura Jealous."
"Thats the most..." Inuyasha paused watching Mirokus' smile widen.
"Dumb plan ever! Are you kidding me!? Kagura isn't the jealous type you moron!"
Miroku frowned. He hadnt even given this idea a chance.
"Oh come on! It's worth a try, don't you think? I mean heres what I just thought of, you go on the date with Kikyo, Sango gets Kagura to go with her to where you and your date are and Kagura is going to see how well you are doing and she'll get jealous of Kikyo and will want you back!!" Miroku explained, he placed a hand on Inuyashas shoulder, "Trust me on this."
Inuyasha swatted his hand away, he jumped off from the counter glaring at Miroku. "Last time" He pointed an accusing Finger at the lech, "I trusted you I nearly almost got killed!"
"Well...That was the past,can't we put that little inicident behind us?"
"If you call being chased down by 3 rotweilers four blocks down, an incident then no! That day I trusted you to NOT tease those dogs, but did you listen? noooo, you had to flash your butt and anger them some more."
"How was I suppose to know that they can jump that fence! It must have been 6 feet tall!" Miroku said defensivley.
"Keh. Only if you noticed that there were boxes lying around on the other side you moron."
"Listen! Just go for this plan. I promise you this girl is safe. She won't bite." Miroku said with a grin. "Shes a miko too!"
Inuyasha arched an eyebrow at Miroku, "What the heck is a miko?"
"I don't know but it sounds good!"
The black haired Inuyasha sighed, there was no use arguing with Miroku. He always had his way. "Fine." He said with a sigh, "Only to make you shut up."
The lech slapped Inuyasha back with glee, "That-a-boy! Now I'll call Sango and tell her of this plan, ok? "
"Ya whatever...while your at it I'm going upstairs to rest." With that Inuyasha left Miroku behind. He began walkin towards the stairs up to his room.
Too bad Miroku didn't know the REAL Kikyo.
RING RING RING
From the airport Sango reached in her purse and pulled out her cell. She glanced at the number and groaned. She click the pickup button and answered, "What Miroku?"
"Do you say that to everyone who calls you?" He asked sarcastically. "Because that's rude you know!"
"Whatever, what do you want?" Sango questioned while pickin her nails.
"For you to bare my children."
Sango growled, the people around her arched away eyeing her closely."Is this what you called me for??Because I'll hang up."
"No." Miroku said with a laugh, "I would like you to do me a favor."
Sango tapped her nails on the chairs arms, "A favor eh? If It is sex then no, sorry."
"Yes and no! I'm not always involved with sex you know... I would like to to bring Kagura to Koss Resturaunt tonight."
"What for?"
"To get her jealous of Inuyasha and Kikyo."
"Wait...I'm confused."
"Let me fill you in...Kagura dumped InuYasha, I already set InuYasha up with a girl named Kikyo so he can get Kagura mad. Since your her friend I thought you can bring her."
"Hmm..On one condition."
"Yes?"
"You stop groping me for a month."
"But Sango...!"
"Don't make it 3 months."
"Fine...No groping."
"And I also like that honda of yours...Maybe-
"Don't push it Sango." Miroku spoke with a monotone voice.
The female laughed"It was worth a try. I'll get Kagura there around 8-ish." With that Sango was about the hang up until she heard Miroku speak again.
"Ok. By the way, Sango?"
She pulled the phone back to her ear and replied,"Yeah...?"
"Will you bear my children?"
Click.
BEEP BEEP BEEP.
'I take that as a no? Ah well there is always tommorow and the day after.' Miroku smirked, that girl was just shy.
'This is stupid..." Inuyasha pondered to himself. "Kagura is going to get jealous. Man why did I ever fall into this plan? ... Oh yeah It was to make Miroku shut up. But My left fist coulda worked too, damnit! If this chick isn't here in the next 5 minutes I'm gon-"
"Here you are ma'm" The waiter said while pulling out a chair. Inuyasha glanced at the girl sitting in front of him.
Her face was pale and he could see her high cheekbones. Her hair sprawled over her shoulders. She had this mysterious aura surrounding her. Now why was a beautifule women like this single?She didnt smile nor say hello. Her emotionless grey eyes just looked at him.
'Do I have something on my face...?' Inuyasha sweatdropped, 'She is just starin at me like I have a third eye....Boy shes hot but now a few seconds with her shes freakin me out.'
"Uh...Hey." Inuyasha spoke tryin to break the silence. She averted her eyes to both her sides. She leaned in closely holding her head on her palms.
"I know who you are."
Her voice was cold.
"W-What?"
"You mongrel."
Inuyasha fumed, "Now hey! You just met me and alwready your giving me names???"
"JUST ADMIT IT UR A HANYOU!"
Everyone dropped their utensils and stared at the maniac female who was standing up pointing her long manicured nails at a young man. They watched closley between them.
"Wait a minute you let you out of the mental instatute you lunitic!?" Inuyasha stood up, and pointed his finger towards her in the same manner. "If anything your one crazy bitch!"
"DEMON! I will purify you!" Kikyo screamed jumping over the table trying to strangle him. Inuyasha ducked crawling on the ground trying to find the exit.
"Hanyou! I will destroy you before you get your filthy hands on the Shikon No Tama!"
"The wha- Ahhhh!!"
She pounced on the male pulling his hair. Everyone in the resturaunt sweatdropped as the girl attacked the poor guy. The manager ran towards them grabbing the girl trying to pull him away from Inuyasha.
"Mommy!" A young boy yelled pointing at the girl on top of the guy, "That kinda looks like you and daddy just 2 nights ag-" The mother covered her sons mouth laughing nervously as the old couple next to them looked at her with disturbed eyes.
"Sango, out of all the places why are you bringing me here?" Kagura asked as she was being dragged by Sango. The magenta eyed female smiled, "it'll be fun!" She exclaimed, "I mean when do we ever get any quality time together?"
Kagura stopped placing her finger on her chin. "Well, we had quality girl time yesterday, before yesterday...and the day before that and-"
"Ok! I get the point." Sango said defensivley. She just wanted her month of no groping by Miroku. She was good at this lying thing.
Kagura and Sango arrived at the Koss Resturaunt. They stood there dumbfounded as they saw a female on top of Inuyasha screaming, with 3 waiters and a manager trying to pry her off.
"Boy..." Was all Sango could say as she stared at the scene in front of her.
"He sure...Knows how to...um..." Kagura blinked rubbing her temples. She was just shocked. "Have fun?"
"Hahahahahaha" Sango bursted out laughing, "Oh my goodness! That is just- hahaha- The funniest - Hehe sight ever!" Kagura cracked a smile and joined her friend in the laughter. Everyone just looked at the two girls on the floor cracking up.
As soon as Inuyasha was free, he watched as she was being dragged away from him. "DIE YOU DEMON! Un-Hand me you fiends! He will destroy the world!!!!" Her voice faded. Yasha fell to the ground. He suddenly arched his eyebrows as he heard 2 familiar girls laughing. 'Aww for fucks sakes! I hope thats not who I hope its not..." He turned his head to see both Sango AND Kagura.
He got up angrily and brushed himself past them. He was going to kill Miroku when he finds him. Inuyasha didnt notice the patch of ice. He slipped and fell on his back.
"FUCK!" He got up and slid off his hands to the ground, "Just my fucking-oh-so-fucking-perfect-day!"
"Need help?" A female voice spoke. She let out her petite hands. Inuyasha glanced up, "Screw off Kikyo you crazy bitch!" He slapped her hands away. The female fumed, "Fine! This is what I get for being a good civilian!"
Inuyasha looked up again and saw clearly as the porch light came on, that this girl was not Kikyo. But a more prettier girl.
"Sorry..." Inuyasha grumbled, the girl smiled and let out her hand once again. As soon as he got up he could see that she had bright blue eyes.
"Looks like you had a bad day."
"Tell me about it." Inuyasha spoke looking away, "Some bitch just tried to kill me not long ago."
"Oh, I see why she wanted to kill you."
"What do you mean?" Inuyasha snapped, glaring at the girl.
"I mean with that attitude. Man why don't you just chillax and sit-
Thump!
Once again Inuyasha slipped on the ice patch. The girl laughed helping him up again.
"Down." She said finishing her sentance. "By the way I'm Kagome." With that she let out a hand, Inuyasha shrugged, "I'm Inuyasha."
"Cute name." She pulled her hand back shrugging, causing Yasha to blush alittle. "Yeah, yeah..."
"Say...I'm new here...What do you say you buy me coffee? I mean since you did call me a bitch. I can get to know you better. And don't worry, I won't kill you."
Inuyasha smirked, "Fine. On one condition."
Kagome looked up at Inuyasha, "Um ok?"
"You promise not to purify me?"
OO'
Now that im out I dont have to hear her scream or shout or watch her try to purify,I meet a new girl shes out of this world Don't want my night to end-
with her too bad i never knew.
Thats shes Sangos old friend. /
I hope you liked this story! I bet you never guessed that Kagome was gonna run into Inuyasha at the end now did ya? I wanted to make them know eachother in the beggining but it didn't fit that poem I made.
Yes, I know, it's a crappy poem. lol
Click that button...
You know you want to.
V
