Chapter 8
Buffy stared in the bathroom mirror that night. She hadn't felt good all day and she'd had to use a lot of foundation that morning to hide her pastiness. It was now late at night and most everyone at Wolfram ad Hart had gone home except for the nighttime regulars. Eve was in the office talking to Angel about Fred's funding or whatever. Buffy hadn't been that interested in all of it and she'd excused herself to the bathroom.
There was something she was hiding from Angel and every look he gave her, she felt guilty. The loving looks he always gave her made her feel ten times guiltier than all the other looks of concern. The Slayer had an idea of what was wrong with her, but she didn't want to admit it to herself, let alone her husband. If she got her hopes up and her assumption turned out to be wrong.. It wouldn't only break her heart, it would shatter Angel's. She couldn't tell him her secret. She couldn't tell anyone.
Taking out her purse, Buffy looked at the pregnancy test hiding in the little pocket inside. All the symptoms were there and she remembered what it had been like before with Connor. Jasmine had said that Connor wasn't the only child that Buffy and Angel were going to have. It could be possible that Buffy was once again pregnant with Angel's baby.
"Buffy." Eve said behind her at the door. Buffy dropped her purse and wheeled around to look at Eve. "Sorry. I didn't mean to startle you. Let me help." Eve made a move to help pick up Buffy's purse, but the Slayer scooped it up.
"I got it."
"Are you ok?"
Buffy closed her eyes, took a breath, and shook her head. "I'm fine."
"You're a little jumpy. Not normal for you."
"I know. I'm just tired I guess."
"Well, we don't really need you for this. You can go home."
"I'm good. I run this company as much as Angel does. So, what'd you want?"
"Angel sent me in here to check on you."
"And now you have and you know I'm fine. So, we can go back to the office and talk to Fred."
"Well, I gotta go get her. So, I'll see you in there."
"Yeah. Good. Ok."
"You sure you're ok?"
"Never better." Buffy nodded and walked out, her purse clutched tightly in her hand. Putting on a light expression, she breezed into the office and tossed her purse on the couch.
"Hey. Did Eve check on you?" Angel asked.
"Yeah." Buffy said, coming over and sitting on the edge of the desk facing Angel.
"You ok? You looked like you were going to throw up again."
"I'm fine. I just had to use the bathroom." Angel gave her The Look. "Girl problems."
He held up his hands. "Thanks for sharing."
"You asked. Besides, we're married. You gotta be used to it by now."
"In all of my 250 years, I haven't gotten used to it. Why would I get used to it now?"
"Cause you live with two girls and miss out on sex for a whole week every month?"
"Good point." Angel smiled up at her. She gave him a little smile as she tried not to let it show that she was ready to throw up again. He noticed though and touched her thigh. "Sweetie, maybe you should go to the doctor. You've been sick for almost two weeks and you can't use that bad Chinese excuse anymore. This could be serious. You're the Slayer. You don't get sick."
"Maybe it was bad Chinese at first, but then Dawn got sick, remember? I could've caught whatever she had. She's just now starting to get over it."
Angel looked at her warily, but before he could say anything, Eve and Fred walked in. Fred walked over and sat down in one of the large leather chairs in front of the desk, Eve walked over and stood in the corner of the office behind the desk, Angel sat down in the chair behind the desk, and Buffy leaned against the desk.
"So, what's going on?" Fred asked.
"Um, I know difficult it's been going from a small detective agency to.. running Wolfram & Hart. And we've all been adjusting, but.." Angel said.
"It's ok. Wes just gave me the talk. And I'm going to have a good meal and at least 6 hours of sleep, so everybody can just stop worrying. I'm fine. Really."
"Good. That's.. Actually, there's some concern about how much the Practical Science Department's been spending."
"Oh. Um.. yeah, I guess I may have gone over my projections by a few.."
"$800,000." Eve cut in. "That's how much you've exceeded your quarterly budget. And the quarter ain't over yet, sweetie."
"Look, I.. I know it sounds like.. I mean, it is a lot of money, but I-I'm trying to do something that's never been done before. So, yeah, attempting to recorporealize Spike is gonna cost.."
"Whoa! Trying to do what?" Buffy asked.
"Make Spike corporeal again like you asked."
"Uh, no, what I asked for was for you to try to find a way to get Spike out of Wolfram & Hart." Angel said. Buffy gave him a look and he looked back at Fred.
"Angel.. We accepted the offer to take over the L.A. branch of an evil, multi-dimensional law firm because we thought we could make a difference. Use the resources of Wolfram & Hart to do something decent."
"She's got a point." Buffy said.
"And how does that have anything to do with Spike?" Angel asked.
"He just saved the world. Vampire with a soul fighting for the good of humanity. Ring anything? He's just like you, a champion."
"God, I really hate that word."
"I'm with Fred on this. Think of what an asset he'd be fighting on our side.. Again."
"Except he won't be. I know Spike better than anyone, and he only cares about himself."
"And Buffy and Faith." Fred shot back.
"Well, this is getting interesting." Eve said.
"You're right. He does care about Buffy. And he does care about Faith. So, where do you think he's gonna run off to as soon as his fresh, new feet hit the ground?"
"Is that what this is about? You're afraid he's gonna come back and try to get with your friend he hurt again?" Fred asked.
"I just want you to be careful, Fred, because I know how charming Spike can be."
"He is quite the dish, with those eyes.." Eve said.
"And the hair and the cheeks and.. What do you think I am, stupid? I know he's been playing me with the looks and the smiles. I'm not some idiot schoolgirl with a crush." Fred said.
"Then what is it?" Angel asked.
"It's about doing what's right. Remember?"
Angel looked at Buffy who had one eyebrow raised. He sighed. "Your department. Your call. Just don't be disappointed if it doesn't work. Some people can't be saved."
"Spike can and will be." Fred turned on her heel and walked out the door.
Angel sighed and knew what was coming next. "You're so.. Uhh!" Buffy shot. "Spike is a friend. How many times do I have to tell you that? You should be happy that Fred is looking for a way to bring him back! Why do you have to be so damn cynical towards Spike?"
"Buffy.."
"Angel." The Slayer mocked. "He saved the world! You were there. You saw him sacrifice himself to save not only us, but the world too!"
"We've saved the world countless times."
"Which is exactly my point. We got second and, some of us, third chances at life. Why shouldn't Spike get his?"
"Because he's Spike!"
"And you were Angelus! What's the difference? Spike's demon is a separate thing just like Angelus is separate from you."
"Why are you always taking his side? He tried to rape Faith! He killed innocents WHILE he had a soul! He's always been about him and never about anybody else. It's always been what HE wants."
"That was before me and the chip and Faith and before he got his soul."
"What about the people he killed?"
"He was under the First's influence! How can you use that against him?"
"Guys.." Eve said.
"What?" They both yelled, turning to look at her.
"I just wanted to tell you that Dawn came in and then ran out. She looked upset."
"Oh great." Buffy looked at Angel. "See what you did!"
"What I did?"
"If you hadn't been all Giles, I wouldn't have ever started in on you."
"If I hadn't been 'all Giles?' What's that supposed to mean?"
"Faith told me all about how Giles sent Spike with Robin so Robin could kill Spike. And I have to go after my sister and explain to her that it was just a fight and we're not turning into my mother and father." Buffy ran out after Dawn leaving Angel to just stand there staring after her.
________________________________________________________________________
Angel walked out of the elevator into his office where Spike was standing waiting for him. "So, what's on the 'genda? Rousting a nest of venomous retirement plans?" Spike asked.
"Shop's closed, Spike. Come back and haunt me tomorrow." Angel said.
"Air's too rarefied up here for my taste, anyhows. Down with the dregs is where I belong, isn't it?"
"And yet he's still here."
"Just thought you me and the wife could hang is all. Couple of vampires from the old days doing our.. hangy thing with the lady of our dreams present. Where is ducks anyway?"
"You're starting to feel it, aren't you? How close you are now.. to hell?"
"What if I am? Not like it's such a big, bleeding deal, is it? If a ponce like you could break out.."
"I never escaped from hell. All I got was a short reprieve. Not even sure how I managed that."
"Oh, put your martyr away, Mahatma. Fred told me all about your great, shining prophecy. Pile up all your good deeds and get the big brass ring handed to you like everything else."
"Except for one small catch. The prophecy's a bunch of bull. They all are. Nothing's written in stone or fated to happen, Spike. You save the world, you end up running an evil law firm."
"Or playin' Casper with one foot in the fryer."
"You think any of it matters? The things we did? The lives we destroyed. That's all that's ever gonna count. So, yeah, surprise. You're going to hell. We both are." Angel sat on the couch.
"Then why even bother? Try to do the right thing, make a difference.."
"What else are we gonna do?"
"So that's it, then. I really am going to burn."
"Welcome to the club."
"Least I got company, eh? You and me, together again. Hope and Crosby. Stills and Nash. Chico and the.."
"Yeah, are we done?"
"Never much for small talk, were you? Always too busy trying to perfect that brooding block-of-wood mystique. God, I love that."
"Not as much as I loved your nonstop yammering."
"The way you always had to be the big swingy, swaggerin' around, barkin' orders.."
"Never listening.."
"Always interrupting.."
"And your hair. What color do they call that, radioactive?"
"Never much cared for you, Liam, even when we were evil."
"Cared for you less."
"Fine."
"Good." Angel sipped from his glass of blood. "There was one thing about you.."
"Really?"
"Yeah, I never told anybody about this, but I-I liked your poems."
"You like Barry Manilow." Spike sighed. "Where's Buffy? She's more fun to talk to."
"I don't know where she is. Dawn's at home alone and Buffy's not in our office as you can tell."
"Did you check her weapons office? She likes it in there."
"She's not there either." Angel noticed Spike was distracted. "What?"
"Don't you see it?"
"See what?"
"Nothing. Too much talk of fire and brimstone." Spike looked over Angel's shoulder and his eyes widened in shock.
"What?"
A while later, Spike was talking about ghosts being everywhere. Angel ordered Eve and Gunn to check the place. Buffy ran in, hearing Spike's ranting. "What's going on?"
"He's ranting and raving that there are ghosts in here." Angel said.
"Ghosts? Spike, what's going on?"
"How come I'm the only.. LEAVE ME ALONE!" Spike yelled. Fred and Wesley ran in.
"Buffy, will you calm him down?" Angel asked.
"Spike.." Buffy started.
"There here! You gotta believe me! They're here."
"Right now?" Angel asked.
"Yes. Right now. Right here. Piss off! I'm trying to have a conversation here! Shut up!"
"Who's he talking to?" Wesley asked.
"Ghosts." Angel said.
"Where?" Fred asked.
"Everywhere." Spike said. "The blighters are coming out of the woodwork! No, I am not talking to you! Go away!"
"We just checked with security." Gunn said, walking in with Eve.
"They do hourly sweeps with the mystics to secure against spectral intrusion." Eve said.
"So how many are we dealing with?" Buffy asked.
"None. Last sweep was 10 minutes ago. Spike's the only non-corporeal in the building." Gunn said.
"Check again." Spike said.
"Maybe we should go back to the lab.." Fred said.
"No, I'm telling you, they're here. You have to check again. Something's happening.." Spike looked around frantically and then back at Fred. "Fred, please, you have to use that perfect brain of yours.." Then he disappeared.
"Spike?" Buffy called.
"Where'd he go?" Eve asked.
"It's ok. He does this sometimes." Angel said.
"We should spread out, see if we can find him. We just need to find him." Fred said.
Buffy stared in the bathroom mirror that night. She hadn't felt good all day and she'd had to use a lot of foundation that morning to hide her pastiness. It was now late at night and most everyone at Wolfram ad Hart had gone home except for the nighttime regulars. Eve was in the office talking to Angel about Fred's funding or whatever. Buffy hadn't been that interested in all of it and she'd excused herself to the bathroom.
There was something she was hiding from Angel and every look he gave her, she felt guilty. The loving looks he always gave her made her feel ten times guiltier than all the other looks of concern. The Slayer had an idea of what was wrong with her, but she didn't want to admit it to herself, let alone her husband. If she got her hopes up and her assumption turned out to be wrong.. It wouldn't only break her heart, it would shatter Angel's. She couldn't tell him her secret. She couldn't tell anyone.
Taking out her purse, Buffy looked at the pregnancy test hiding in the little pocket inside. All the symptoms were there and she remembered what it had been like before with Connor. Jasmine had said that Connor wasn't the only child that Buffy and Angel were going to have. It could be possible that Buffy was once again pregnant with Angel's baby.
"Buffy." Eve said behind her at the door. Buffy dropped her purse and wheeled around to look at Eve. "Sorry. I didn't mean to startle you. Let me help." Eve made a move to help pick up Buffy's purse, but the Slayer scooped it up.
"I got it."
"Are you ok?"
Buffy closed her eyes, took a breath, and shook her head. "I'm fine."
"You're a little jumpy. Not normal for you."
"I know. I'm just tired I guess."
"Well, we don't really need you for this. You can go home."
"I'm good. I run this company as much as Angel does. So, what'd you want?"
"Angel sent me in here to check on you."
"And now you have and you know I'm fine. So, we can go back to the office and talk to Fred."
"Well, I gotta go get her. So, I'll see you in there."
"Yeah. Good. Ok."
"You sure you're ok?"
"Never better." Buffy nodded and walked out, her purse clutched tightly in her hand. Putting on a light expression, she breezed into the office and tossed her purse on the couch.
"Hey. Did Eve check on you?" Angel asked.
"Yeah." Buffy said, coming over and sitting on the edge of the desk facing Angel.
"You ok? You looked like you were going to throw up again."
"I'm fine. I just had to use the bathroom." Angel gave her The Look. "Girl problems."
He held up his hands. "Thanks for sharing."
"You asked. Besides, we're married. You gotta be used to it by now."
"In all of my 250 years, I haven't gotten used to it. Why would I get used to it now?"
"Cause you live with two girls and miss out on sex for a whole week every month?"
"Good point." Angel smiled up at her. She gave him a little smile as she tried not to let it show that she was ready to throw up again. He noticed though and touched her thigh. "Sweetie, maybe you should go to the doctor. You've been sick for almost two weeks and you can't use that bad Chinese excuse anymore. This could be serious. You're the Slayer. You don't get sick."
"Maybe it was bad Chinese at first, but then Dawn got sick, remember? I could've caught whatever she had. She's just now starting to get over it."
Angel looked at her warily, but before he could say anything, Eve and Fred walked in. Fred walked over and sat down in one of the large leather chairs in front of the desk, Eve walked over and stood in the corner of the office behind the desk, Angel sat down in the chair behind the desk, and Buffy leaned against the desk.
"So, what's going on?" Fred asked.
"Um, I know difficult it's been going from a small detective agency to.. running Wolfram & Hart. And we've all been adjusting, but.." Angel said.
"It's ok. Wes just gave me the talk. And I'm going to have a good meal and at least 6 hours of sleep, so everybody can just stop worrying. I'm fine. Really."
"Good. That's.. Actually, there's some concern about how much the Practical Science Department's been spending."
"Oh. Um.. yeah, I guess I may have gone over my projections by a few.."
"$800,000." Eve cut in. "That's how much you've exceeded your quarterly budget. And the quarter ain't over yet, sweetie."
"Look, I.. I know it sounds like.. I mean, it is a lot of money, but I-I'm trying to do something that's never been done before. So, yeah, attempting to recorporealize Spike is gonna cost.."
"Whoa! Trying to do what?" Buffy asked.
"Make Spike corporeal again like you asked."
"Uh, no, what I asked for was for you to try to find a way to get Spike out of Wolfram & Hart." Angel said. Buffy gave him a look and he looked back at Fred.
"Angel.. We accepted the offer to take over the L.A. branch of an evil, multi-dimensional law firm because we thought we could make a difference. Use the resources of Wolfram & Hart to do something decent."
"She's got a point." Buffy said.
"And how does that have anything to do with Spike?" Angel asked.
"He just saved the world. Vampire with a soul fighting for the good of humanity. Ring anything? He's just like you, a champion."
"God, I really hate that word."
"I'm with Fred on this. Think of what an asset he'd be fighting on our side.. Again."
"Except he won't be. I know Spike better than anyone, and he only cares about himself."
"And Buffy and Faith." Fred shot back.
"Well, this is getting interesting." Eve said.
"You're right. He does care about Buffy. And he does care about Faith. So, where do you think he's gonna run off to as soon as his fresh, new feet hit the ground?"
"Is that what this is about? You're afraid he's gonna come back and try to get with your friend he hurt again?" Fred asked.
"I just want you to be careful, Fred, because I know how charming Spike can be."
"He is quite the dish, with those eyes.." Eve said.
"And the hair and the cheeks and.. What do you think I am, stupid? I know he's been playing me with the looks and the smiles. I'm not some idiot schoolgirl with a crush." Fred said.
"Then what is it?" Angel asked.
"It's about doing what's right. Remember?"
Angel looked at Buffy who had one eyebrow raised. He sighed. "Your department. Your call. Just don't be disappointed if it doesn't work. Some people can't be saved."
"Spike can and will be." Fred turned on her heel and walked out the door.
Angel sighed and knew what was coming next. "You're so.. Uhh!" Buffy shot. "Spike is a friend. How many times do I have to tell you that? You should be happy that Fred is looking for a way to bring him back! Why do you have to be so damn cynical towards Spike?"
"Buffy.."
"Angel." The Slayer mocked. "He saved the world! You were there. You saw him sacrifice himself to save not only us, but the world too!"
"We've saved the world countless times."
"Which is exactly my point. We got second and, some of us, third chances at life. Why shouldn't Spike get his?"
"Because he's Spike!"
"And you were Angelus! What's the difference? Spike's demon is a separate thing just like Angelus is separate from you."
"Why are you always taking his side? He tried to rape Faith! He killed innocents WHILE he had a soul! He's always been about him and never about anybody else. It's always been what HE wants."
"That was before me and the chip and Faith and before he got his soul."
"What about the people he killed?"
"He was under the First's influence! How can you use that against him?"
"Guys.." Eve said.
"What?" They both yelled, turning to look at her.
"I just wanted to tell you that Dawn came in and then ran out. She looked upset."
"Oh great." Buffy looked at Angel. "See what you did!"
"What I did?"
"If you hadn't been all Giles, I wouldn't have ever started in on you."
"If I hadn't been 'all Giles?' What's that supposed to mean?"
"Faith told me all about how Giles sent Spike with Robin so Robin could kill Spike. And I have to go after my sister and explain to her that it was just a fight and we're not turning into my mother and father." Buffy ran out after Dawn leaving Angel to just stand there staring after her.
________________________________________________________________________
Angel walked out of the elevator into his office where Spike was standing waiting for him. "So, what's on the 'genda? Rousting a nest of venomous retirement plans?" Spike asked.
"Shop's closed, Spike. Come back and haunt me tomorrow." Angel said.
"Air's too rarefied up here for my taste, anyhows. Down with the dregs is where I belong, isn't it?"
"And yet he's still here."
"Just thought you me and the wife could hang is all. Couple of vampires from the old days doing our.. hangy thing with the lady of our dreams present. Where is ducks anyway?"
"You're starting to feel it, aren't you? How close you are now.. to hell?"
"What if I am? Not like it's such a big, bleeding deal, is it? If a ponce like you could break out.."
"I never escaped from hell. All I got was a short reprieve. Not even sure how I managed that."
"Oh, put your martyr away, Mahatma. Fred told me all about your great, shining prophecy. Pile up all your good deeds and get the big brass ring handed to you like everything else."
"Except for one small catch. The prophecy's a bunch of bull. They all are. Nothing's written in stone or fated to happen, Spike. You save the world, you end up running an evil law firm."
"Or playin' Casper with one foot in the fryer."
"You think any of it matters? The things we did? The lives we destroyed. That's all that's ever gonna count. So, yeah, surprise. You're going to hell. We both are." Angel sat on the couch.
"Then why even bother? Try to do the right thing, make a difference.."
"What else are we gonna do?"
"So that's it, then. I really am going to burn."
"Welcome to the club."
"Least I got company, eh? You and me, together again. Hope and Crosby. Stills and Nash. Chico and the.."
"Yeah, are we done?"
"Never much for small talk, were you? Always too busy trying to perfect that brooding block-of-wood mystique. God, I love that."
"Not as much as I loved your nonstop yammering."
"The way you always had to be the big swingy, swaggerin' around, barkin' orders.."
"Never listening.."
"Always interrupting.."
"And your hair. What color do they call that, radioactive?"
"Never much cared for you, Liam, even when we were evil."
"Cared for you less."
"Fine."
"Good." Angel sipped from his glass of blood. "There was one thing about you.."
"Really?"
"Yeah, I never told anybody about this, but I-I liked your poems."
"You like Barry Manilow." Spike sighed. "Where's Buffy? She's more fun to talk to."
"I don't know where she is. Dawn's at home alone and Buffy's not in our office as you can tell."
"Did you check her weapons office? She likes it in there."
"She's not there either." Angel noticed Spike was distracted. "What?"
"Don't you see it?"
"See what?"
"Nothing. Too much talk of fire and brimstone." Spike looked over Angel's shoulder and his eyes widened in shock.
"What?"
A while later, Spike was talking about ghosts being everywhere. Angel ordered Eve and Gunn to check the place. Buffy ran in, hearing Spike's ranting. "What's going on?"
"He's ranting and raving that there are ghosts in here." Angel said.
"Ghosts? Spike, what's going on?"
"How come I'm the only.. LEAVE ME ALONE!" Spike yelled. Fred and Wesley ran in.
"Buffy, will you calm him down?" Angel asked.
"Spike.." Buffy started.
"There here! You gotta believe me! They're here."
"Right now?" Angel asked.
"Yes. Right now. Right here. Piss off! I'm trying to have a conversation here! Shut up!"
"Who's he talking to?" Wesley asked.
"Ghosts." Angel said.
"Where?" Fred asked.
"Everywhere." Spike said. "The blighters are coming out of the woodwork! No, I am not talking to you! Go away!"
"We just checked with security." Gunn said, walking in with Eve.
"They do hourly sweeps with the mystics to secure against spectral intrusion." Eve said.
"So how many are we dealing with?" Buffy asked.
"None. Last sweep was 10 minutes ago. Spike's the only non-corporeal in the building." Gunn said.
"Check again." Spike said.
"Maybe we should go back to the lab.." Fred said.
"No, I'm telling you, they're here. You have to check again. Something's happening.." Spike looked around frantically and then back at Fred. "Fred, please, you have to use that perfect brain of yours.." Then he disappeared.
"Spike?" Buffy called.
"Where'd he go?" Eve asked.
"It's ok. He does this sometimes." Angel said.
"We should spread out, see if we can find him. We just need to find him." Fred said.