It didn't mean anything

That's what I told him, but that wasn't how I felt. It meant so much more to be than he will ever know. I don't really know how he felt about it, but I know it meant the same. The way he held on to me so tight when we kissed. He let me know that he wanted it to.

I can't forget it and I won't.

Flashback

My dad was caught in a horrible storm while he was on his ship so me and Lucas was in a hotel room staying the night, cause the bridge was closed down till 5. They said they found a body and I needed to know if it was him. I had to know. I couldn't imagine living the next 2 weeks wondering if he was going to come though those doors or not.

Lucas and Peyton was laying in the bed beside each other. Feeling kinda aquored, cause he was with Brooke. Finally Peyton broke the silence.

"My dad use to always come home from the ship with arms full of candy and presents. He told me that was his way to keep me running to the door everytime he came in and it worked. I was right on the porch when I heard him pull into the drive way. Lucas what if it's him? What am I going to do?"

"Keep his memories close to you Peyt. Never forget a single thing."

"I still remember he would always get mad cause Nathan would always run over and tap on my window to let him in when it was thundering. He always said he was scared, but I knew he just wanted to cuddle. My dad for some reason always knew when he came and would always catch. Sometimes he would just laugh and walk back out, but sometimes he would yell at Nathan and make him climb back out the window."

Lucas laughs.

"Do you think it's him?" Peyton asks worried.

"No, I really don't Peyton. I know your dad. He wouldn't let you down."

"He has before."

"Get some sleep Peyton." Lucas says not wanting her to cry.

"I can't." She pulls a necklace out of her book bag that was laying next to the bed. "He gave this to me when I was 11. He gave it to my mom on their second date. This necklace made my mom fall so in love with him that she said yes to him on the second date when he asked her to marry him."

"Are you serious?"

"Yeah and they were together for 13 years after. That's why I now believe in love at first sight."

"Yeah."

"Lucas I want to give you this. I want you to feel all those feelings my mom felt when my dad gave this to her."

Lucas looked over at her and saw the serious in her eyes. He scoots over close to her.

"Come here." Lucas says putting his arms around her.

"She said the feeling was so great that nothing else around her mattered at the time. You deserve to feel that feeling."

Lucas lets go and stands up.

"What's wrong?" Peyton asks.

"Peyton I have a girlfriend back there in Tree Hill."

"Yeah?"

"I have a girlfriend, but for some reason I am feeling these feelings for you that I have never felt for Brooke?"

"What feelings?"

"That I love you."

Peyton stands up and walks over to him.

"Really?"

"Yeah I know it's crazy, but it's how I feel."

Peyton lays her head on his chest.

"I don't think your crazy." Peyton whispers. "Cause I feel the same." She looks up. She couldn't take it anymore she had to do it. She didn't care if he rejected she just wanted to see his reaction. Peyton kisses him and surprisingly enough he didn't back away. Instead he helped her take her jacket off.

"OMG." She says to herself. He is not actually helping me get undressed. This is great we have waited so long for this and we can finally have it." She screams inside as he lays her down. She smiles as he takes his shirt off.

"I can't believe I can finally have it." Lucas says.

"It's all yours babe."

Lucas starts kissing down her stomach and her neck, but something clicks in his head. He stands up and gets his shirt back on.

"Lucas what are you doing?"

"Not now Peyton. I don't want to become the guy that cheats on his girlfriend. Peyton our time will come just not now."

"Come to bed Lucas." Peyton says scooting back and getting under the covers. She pulls them down for Lucas.

"Are you sure it won't be weird?"

"Just come on." Peyton says clicking off the lamp and laying down.

Lucas lays down and pulls the covers up over Peyton then over him. He lays there thinking then moves over towards Peyton kinda hesitating, but he wraps his arms around her. He didn't care at that moment what anyone thought of him. They could call him a trader, a cheater, unfaithful. All he knew was he was in love for the first time and it was with Peyton.

Flashback Ends

And that's how we ended things we found out it wasn't him and we had a a silent ride back. He did asks me if that night meant anything to me. I told him no that we just got caught up in the moment and he agreed. I didn't think he would, but he did.

You say you don't love her, but when I look at you two I see fate I see destiny. I see love just dieing to happen and it will just wait.

I just want to tell him I love him and I still look back at that night from time to time. It was so special and romantic. I wish we went all the way. Now I guess we will never have our chance. I see him walking down the hall hand in hand with Brooke. He smiles at me, but I don't smile back. I don't need his pity. I will move on.

I won't forget it. I promise you that. I know you are in love with her and I understand.

I remember
When you looked into my eyes
You saw
Right through me
And I could not hide
I was exposed
Just like a child
All of my heart
You hold in your hands
I'm yours to command
I, I feel so humble
With you in my life
I remember when I looked into your eyes
I saw a reflection of myself
And
I could not lie
Out of control
Too weak to deny
All of my soul is naked before you
But what can I do
There is nothing I can do
I, I feel so beautiful
With you in my life
I remember

I love you still Lucas even though you can't love me back.