Disclaimer: Same old story, my names not J.K. Rowling, therefore I do not own Harry Potter.

A/N: OMG I have over 100 reviews!! I never expected the wonderful response I have received for this story, thank you all sooooo much for your support and comments. I cannot believe all the positive reviews I have gotten for this story. And I am thrilled that you all liked the last chapter, the response to it was AMAZING!

MiLoV – I know it was sad, but like I said it had to happen.
Mir – I am definitely thinking about writing more, but not until I'm done with this story!
my1-and-only – I'm thrilled to hear you're liking the story so much! I hope I didn't make you wait too long for this chapter!
Llywelyn Willoughby – lol! I know I think Draco being hot and mean is why people like pairing him and Hermione so much, it's like the 'bad boy' and 'forbidden love' thing. Glad you like it!
zuvalupa – I'm glad you feel sorry for both of them cause that's exactly what I was going for, yay! Also in reference to your question about Draco's journal . . . . .yes
Aanchal – addicted to it huh? Well I certainly hope this update came before you started feeling withdrawal symptoms! (j/k) Thanks for the review!
INNIKA – I'm happy to hear you like it!
midnite-goddess – Hmm, those are very good questions. However, I cannot bring myself to ruin the story by answering them. Sorry! But I will definitely write more and update as fast as I can so you can find out the answers yourself.
Chamei – I know I felt bad having Draco do that to Hermione, but he did it for her.
Sirius's-Sweetiepie – Why thank you, I'm glad you like it!
BettyLuSue – Thank you very much, I'm happy you're enjoying it!
Phoebe Telumetar – Are things going to get better? I don't want to ruin the story, so I'm sorry but my answer to that is just to read on and see. I'm glad you thought the last chapter was moving though!
roundrockrules – I'm glad you liked the chapter and the story, and I will definitely keep writing!
HarryPotterFan670 – I hope this update came fast enough for you! I'm happy you're enjoying it!
Ginny-W13 – Thank you, I'm so glad to hear you like it. I hope this update came quick enough for you!

Well, now that I have thanked everyone, it is only fair for me to keep up with my half of the deal by presenting you with the next chapter.

So without further adieu, here is chapter 17!

Chapter 17: Never Be Happy Again

Hermione did not sleep that night, she barely even tried. She spent the entire night crying silent tears while staring unseeing at the ceiling. The year's events with Draco kept running through her mind. The way it felt to be touched by his firm hands and held in his arms. How safe she felt when she looked into his eyes, and mostly how betrayed she felt seeing him with Pansy. In the back of her mind she wondered how long that affair had been going on, and whether he had ever really cared for her at all. She closed her eyes when she heard Pavarti and Lavender wake up and prepare for classes that day, feigning sleep. She wasn't hungry, or in the mood to do anything besides wallow in her misery.

Ginny knocked quietly on Hermione's door and called, "Hermione, you awake?" When Hermione didn't answer, she continued downstairs to meet Harry and Ron in the common room. "Hey guys," she said to them when she arrived, "I don't think Hermione's gonna be joining us for breakfast today. If I were her I wouldn't be very hungry either."

The boys just nodded sadly, and the group made there way to the Great Hall, each thinking about what they could do to cheer up Hermione. In all honesty, they had actually begun to get used to the idea of Draco and Hermione dating. And Draco was actually civil to them when he saw them in the halls, even if Hermione wasn't present. Ginny had thought that he had changed as well, although Harry was never totally convinced, and Ron continued to view Draco as lower than pond scum. The present situation didn't improve his opinion of Draco in the least.

- - - - - - - - - -

Draco barely got any sleep himself, he tossed and turned all night. He honestly wished he could just remain in his bed and get a proper sleep, however he knew that would be stupid. Reluctantly he got up, dressed and stared disgustedly at Crabbe and Goyle. Taking his rage at himself out on them he shouted "Crabbe Goyle! Why are you still sleeping?! Get out of bed NOW!"

Crabbe and Goyle both fell clumsily out of bed, grunting and mumbling incoherently. They threw on some school robes and followed Draco into the common room with sleep still in there eyes. Pansy was waiting for them in a chair by the fire. "Draco! There you are! How are you this morning darling?" She wrapped herself around his arm smiling so sweetly it made him sick.

"Lay off Pansy," responded Draco irritably.

Pansy led Draco out of the common room, "Now, now Draco," Pansy said in a voice of sickening sweetness, "what kind of girlfriend would I be if I didn't greet my boyfriend when I saw him." She paused for a moment, and when she continued there was a trace of resentment and jealousy in her tone, "besides, we wouldn't want precious little Hermione to miss out on seeing us together now would we?" She hooked her arm around his and with a huge smile on her face, led him through the halls to the Great Hall, with Crabbe and Goyle in their wake. Draco rolled his eyes at first, and then mustered up his old smirk that made him look arrogant, proud and so much like Lucius it was scary.

Draco took a deep breath when they reached the doors of the Great Hall, then purposely banged them open in order to attract attention. He succeeded, and nearly every head turned to see who was entering. Out of habit Draco's gaze flickered over to Hermione's usual seat only to find that she wasn't there, instead his eyes met the angry stares of Ron, Harry and Ginny. It killed him inside to be reminded of how much he hurt her, but instead of showing his pain on the outside, he smirked even more and held Pansy closer to him, leading her over to the Slytherin table.

"That filthy rotten jerk!" whispered Ron, "I'll kill him!"

No one tried to dissuade Ron from this idea, as they all were thinking about killing Draco themselves. Yet due to the fact that the room was filled with professors, none of them actually acted upon the idea.

Harry and Ron made their way to potions fully expecting to see Hermione waiting for them, but she never showed. Nor was she at Transfiguration. "Harry, I'm really worried, Hermione has never cut class for anything!"

"I know" agreed Harry, "If she's not at lunch lets go check on her."

They were unhappy to find that Hermione was not at lunch, so together with Ginny they made their way to the common room, with some extra food for Hermione. She was not in the common room, so Ginny went to check the dormitory. "She's not there either, where could she be?"

"Maybe she went to the hospital wing," suggested Harry.

They ran to check, but found the hospital wing empty. They asked Madam Pomfrey if Hermione had been there, but she had not.

Suddenly a look passed over Ginny's face that was so reminiscent of Hermione whenever she got a sudden idea that it was uncanny, "Maybe she, but why? That would only make it worse."

"Mind telling us what you're talking about?" asked Ron annoyed.

"I think I know where she went," answered Ginny.

"And . . . "

"The room in the library."

"But why would she go there? That place must be full of memories of her and Malfoy."

"I know," agreed Ginny, "but I still think that's where she is."

Unconvinced, Harry and Ron followed Ginny as she raced through the halls to the library, she slowed to a tiptoe as she approached the private room, sure enough, the door was opened a crack. Ginny peeked in without moving the door to be sure it was Hermione who was inside. Indeed, Hermione was curled up in one of the armchairs with Crookshanks in her lap; she was stroking him absentmindedly as she stared into the fire, not seeing anything.

"Hermione," whispered Ginny, "are you alright?"

Hermione made no response or even any indication that she had heard Ginny.

"You must be hungry, we brought you some lunch," ventured Ginny as she placed the food on the table. She then sat delicately on the edge of the chair, "Hermione please talk to us, we want to help you, we're your friends, and we'll always be here for you."

A single tear rolled down Hermione's cheek, "but I was such a jerk to you guys. I can't believe I defended him! You all warned me that he was no good; I knew he was horrible, but I fell for him anyway! How could I have been so stupid!" She hid her face in her hands, "I'm so embarrassed."

Harry and Ron both came forward to comfort her, "you didn't do anything wrong Hermione," assured Harry.

"Yeah, and it's not like he just fooled you, he managed to make the entire school believe that he actually cared for you," said Ron. But at these words, Hermione began to sob again. Ginny smacked Ron, and gave him an exasperated look.

"You don't understand," sobbed Hermione through her tears, "the things he made me feel, the emotions I saw in his eyes, they were real, I know they were. I just wish I knew what happened to change them." Suddenly, a horrible thought flashed in Hermione's mind, what if he cheated on her because she refused to do certain things with him? She often felt that he had wanted to go further than she would allow, but he never had pushed her and he always seemed perfectly fine. Maybe she wasn't as good at reading him as she thought. She didn't vocalize her thoughts, and she immediately chided herself for even thinking them. But deep down she was almost positive that they were true.

"Come on Hermione, eat something, you must be starving,"

Hermione took an apple, but did not eat it, she merely moved it between her hands, and continued to gaze into the fire. Finally, after several moments of tense silence, Hermione spoke, "I don't know what I'm gonna do, I can't possibly face him again, and he's in nearly all of my classes!"

"We'll be right there with you Hermione, so you don't have to worry about that," assured Ron.

"What about arithmancy? None of you are in that class with me! And I still have to do that fucking potions project with him!" Hermione motioned to the cauldron as she ranted. Her three friends were speechless; they had never heard Hermione swear no matter how upset or stressed she was. Clearly, they had no clue just how deeply hurt Draco had left her.

"Hermione, everything will be alright we promise" ventured Harry doing his best to sound supportive.

"Hmph" Hermione paused before speaking. "Have you seen him today?"

None of the group wanted to answer, they didn't want to upset Hermione further, but eventually Ginny responded in a quiet voice. "Yes, he was in the Great Hall with his usual gang of Slytherins."

Hermione drew a quick and nervous breath, "and, was she one of them?"

Ginny bit her lip and turned her head to the floor, which Hermione correctly interpreted as a 'yes'. Just then the bell signaling the beginning of afternoon classes, "Well," sighed Hermione, "I guess I can't put it off forever." With that, Hermione threw her apple into the fire, and led the way out of the library. The others followed her wordlessly.

When she Harry and Ron reached the charms door, Hermione paused and took a deep breath, then entered. She tried her best not to look towards where she knew Draco was, but as she sat in between Harry and Ron, she couldn't help herself. He was sitting on the other side of the room apparently thinking hard. Instantly she began to wonder if maybe he was thinking about her, regretting what he had done. As pathetic and hopeless as she knew it was, she couldn't help but wish that he would apologize and ask for her forgiveness. She couldn't decide if she would accept his apology or not. At the moment she wanted to chop his head off and curse him to bits, but deep down she couldn't deny that she loved him, and wanted him back. Harry and Ron looked upon Hermione sadly as she studied Draco's every move.

Draco felt eyes burning into the side of his head, and he didn't need to be psychic to know who was staring at him. He thought for a moment about how to handle this situation, and the phrase, 'anything worth doing is worth doing right' popped into his head. So with that thought in mind, he took out his quill and a spare bit of parchment, took a deep breath and began to write. He then folded the note into an airplane and sent it flying across the room.

Hermione watched as Draco wrote and folded the parchment, and her heart soared and a slight smile crossed her lips when the plane landed in front of her. She looked back at Draco, expecting to see his eyes full of sorrow and regret. But the eyes she met almost made her yelp. He was looking at her with an expression that was colder and harsher than she had ever seen him look. He looked dangerous, she gulped and unfolded the paper airplane, knowing as she did that she did not want to read whatever he had written.

Finally in class are you? Aww what's the matter Granger, did somebody hurt your feelings? Did someone make you cry? You're so pathetic Granger, believing in all that stupid love crap.

Tears welled up in Hermione's eyes as she read the note, he had said exactly what would hurt her the most. He had never loved her, their relationship had all been a game to him to satisfy his own twisted amusement. In a rage of anger she crumbled up the note and raced out of the classroom, trying not to let Draco see that he had made her cry again.

Harry and Ron watched with anticipation as Hermione read the note, and then they backed away when she stormed out. Harry picked up the note, read it and with a look of disgust, he passed it to Ron. Then they looked over to Draco, who was leaning back in his chair, with his feet on the desk smiling proudly at what he had done. "That sick bastard!" shouted Ron in a whisper.

"Let's kill him after class," suggested Harry angrily as professor Flitwick entered and climbed onto the pile of books behind his desk.

Hermione returned halfway into class her eyes red and swollen from crying. She absolutely refused to look at Draco, but she could not remove him or his note from her mind. She gripped her quill so tightly that it nearly cracked in half, and there were ink splotches all over her notes, which were very incomplete indeed, especially for Hermione's standards. When class ended everyone gathered up their books, and the three Gryffindors made there way out of the room, the boys to Divination, and Hermione to Arithmancy. "Hermione, are you going to be okay without us?" asked Harry worriedly, "cause we can skive off Divination if you want."

"Yeah we really wouldn't mind," agreed Ron hopefully.

"No," answered Hermione quickly, "thanks a lot guys, but I'm already pissed at myself enough for letting him get to me in charms class, I don't want him to know how much he's hurt me. I don't want to give him the satisfaction."

"Okay," replied Harry, "We'll meet you in the Great Hall after class for dinner then." With that he directed Ron toward the North Tower.

Hermione meanwhile grit her teeth and stepped off towards Arithmancy. Fear began to build up in her stomach the closer she got to class because she would have to sit next to him for the full class period. The closer she got to the classroom, the more she regretted not having Harry and Ron stay with her, because she seriously doubted that she would be able to make it all the way through class without them. She stopped in the threshold when she reached the classroom, subconsciously holding her breath. She only moved when a fellow student grunted behind her, "oh sorry," she mumbled. Draco was already seated, his feet on the desk, leaning back in his chair with his arms crossed over his eyes. Just yesterday this sight would have caused butterflies of excitement and passion to flutter gently in her stomach. She probably would have even surprised him with a little kiss. Now however, her stomach was churning with dread, and her throat went dry with fear. She took her seat and immediately busied herself with rummaging through her bag for her things, just so she wouldn't have to look at him. She didn't notice that Draco lifted his arms and was watching her, he knew exactly what she was doing and he debated whether or not he should torture her more to make sure she truly hated him. Just as he decided that he would, professor Vector walked in, preventing him from actually speaking. But he thought of an even better way to make Hermione squirm.

He waited until class was nearly finished, when he was sure that he had succeeded in making Hermione feel as if he was just going to ignore her. Then, he allowed his hand to drift over to Hermione's thigh. He stroked it gently. His touch brought shivers to her spine, and nearly caused her to forget everything he had done. But as soon as she snapped back to reality, she smacked his hand away and looked determinedly in front of her. But Draco was just beginning, he waited a moment, then returned his hand to her thigh and began working it up under her skirt. She tensed immediately and moved her chair as far away from his as she could. Draco snuck a glance at her, and noticed that she was breathing more heavily, and when her hand touched his he felt that it was moist. Knowing that he could still turn her on, even when she was furious with him just made his plan work better. She, feeling his eyes on her, turned to glare at him. He flashed the same sexy smile at her that always took her breath away and drove her wild, and at the same time, he returned his hand to her thigh.

Hermione was expecting him to glare back, but the look she received coupled with him touching her took her completely by surprise, she squeaked and jumped in surprise, and fell right off her chair.

"Something the matter Miss Granger?" questioned professor Vector. She looked suspiciously at Draco, for it was no secret that Hermione and Draco were no longer together, even among the teachers; everyone had seen Draco walk into the Great Hall with Pansy happily attached to his arm. However, Draco pretended to be just as shocked at Hermione's clumsiness as everyone else was.

Hermione looked timidly up from the ground blushing redder than a tomato, she spoke in a whisper that was barely audible, "No professor, I'm fine." She quietly returned her chair to its upright position, climbed in it, and bent her head down to her notes to hide the tears that were creeping into her eyes.

When the bell rang, Hermione was the first out the door, her eyes red, and glistening with unshed tears. She had managed to not cry during class, but when she saw Harry and Ron, the dam broke.

"Hermione! What happened?" asked Ron. But Hermione couldn't make a comprehensible sentence. Not that she needed to, they knew who had made her cry. Ron was busy trying to get Hermione to talk to him, but Harry wasn't looking at Hermione, he was watching the students walk by. When he saw that distinctive platinum hair, he started.

The punch came so fast Draco didn't know what hit him, though he had a good guess who. "What the fuck Malfoy!" shouted Harry after he hit him.

Draco would be nursing a bad bruise later, but at the present he kept his cool, "something the matter Potter?"

"I'll tell you what's the matter, you're still alive," with that Harry took another swing, but Draco easily dodged it.

"Good observation Potter do you have any other riveting news to share? Or is one bit of knowledge enough for this week?" taunted Draco with his pompous smirk back in place.

Harry didn't even speak, he got ready to swing again as Ron joined his side. "Shut it Malfoy," spat Ron.

"Make me, Weasel," retorted Draco.

Harry and Ron both moved to fight, when Hermione finally spoke, "Wait!"

"Hermione," cried Ron in an exasperated voice, and stopping himself in mid punch, "let us beat him down, think about what he's done to you!"

"I know what he's done to me!" shouted Hermione so loud that several passing students stopped to view the scene. When she continued she tried to keep her voice down and prevent the tears from flowing. She looked pitifully at Draco, and he could tell that she still wanted him back. After a moment she turned back to Harry and Ron and continued, "but remember last time, you two are going to get into big trouble if you fight again, and trust me, the stupid ferret isn't worth that." With that she turned, and began speed walking down the hall.

"Consider yourself lucky Hermione has a conscience," muttered Harry, "otherwise you wouldn't be breathing right now."

How can Draco be so mean?! How can Hemrione still care for him?! Will they ever get back together, or is it too late for them?? Hmmm, I guess we shall have to wait and see . . . .
Send be a review and let me know what you think!