Whiskey Lullaby
By: Killasandra Serenity
Summary: song-fic (sorta), After Hogwarts... oh and Moldy Wart is dead. Severus has to leave for a while and when he comes back and sees Harry in a compromising situation with another he leaves him and drowns himself in fire-whiskey. Drama/angst/romance rated pg-13 for drinking... lots of drinking... oh and dying.
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, that is the talented J.K. Rowling, I also do not own the song, which is a lovely duet with Brad Paisley and Alison Krauss. NOTE: I did not change the she to he... the song sounds better that way, try to ignore the fact that the verse calls Harry a she.
A/N: This came to me while I was at work; I work in a shoe department so you can guess at the amount of time I have to think about endless junk like fics. The problem comes in finding time to write them down.
"speaking"
SSSSSSSSS - time change
'thinking'
italics - writing & song
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"Harry love, I know that you don't want me to go... but if the remaining death eaters really are getting back together, then I must be involved. This might be our only chance to catch them red handed." Severus says for the third time that evening while packing.
"I know... I know..." Harry says as he comes up and hugs his older lover from behind. "I just don't want to see you in the line of fire again."
Severus leans back into the touch. "Harry I'll be fine... if I can survive a decade under the Dark Lord, I think I can survive a few meetings with his minions." Severus says tired of arguing and just trying to get Harry to understand.
"You are one of the strongest wizards alive..." Harry says with a smile followed by a kiss to Severus's neck.
A rare smile graced the potion masters lips, "I love you Harry, and for our last night together for a while... will you just hold me? Before I go I just want to feel safe in your arms."
"Of course Sev, my love... Holding you in my arms all night will just ready my appetite for when I see you again." Harry says with a low chuckle.
"You will wait for me won't you love?" Severus asks the anxiousness evident in his tone of voice.
"Of course I will... I will love you 'til I die." Harry said, shocked that his love... his Severus would even think such a thing.
Severus was reassured by the love in Harry's voice and quickly finished packing, and then changed into his silk pajama's pants to get ready for bed. Harry too changed and the lovers lay on the bed and Harry held Severus just like he said he would.
When Harry awoke the next morning he discovered that Severus was already gone. 'I can't believe that he didn't even say goodbye..." Harry thinks but then glances at Sev's pillow and sees a letter.
Harry,
You looked so beautiful in your sleep that I simply didn't wantTo wake you so I will say goodbye in this letter. No... not goodbye,
'til I see you again, for I will see you again my love. I don't know
how long I will be gone, not more than a month I am sure. Merlin
I will miss you. Don't forget that no-one is to know where I have
Gone. Wait for me... for the day I can see your beautiful face again.
With my heart and all my love,
Severus S. Snape
As Harry read the letter tears began to form in his eyes. 'A month... I can last a month." Harry thinks to himself, hoping that he isn't kidding himself.
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A month had already passed and Harry's health had started to fail in his anxiousness for his love to return. 'Where can he be? He said no more than a month.' Harry thinks as clutching the letter, the last link to his love.Harry is startled out of his thoughts by the ward activating, telling him that someone was at the door. Harry goes to the door and readily answers it seeing Draco; desperate for any form of company.
"Harry is Severus there?" Draco asks as Harry motions for him to enter. Harry can see the despair on his face and wonders what has happened to his usual stoic mask.
Harry shakes his head no, "He hasn't returned from his trip yet, but any day now he should be home." He adds hopefully.
"Oh... we'll I'll just go then... I wouldn't want to bother you." Draco says dejectedly.
"No... wait, I can see that something is wrong why don't you sit, have a cup of tea and discuss it with me?" Harry asks hurriedly before the distressed man can run out the door.
"I suppose... we did set our differences aside several years ago..." Draco says while hanging his coat back up and slowly walking into the kitchen.
Harry motions for Draco to sit while he starts making the tea. When the tea is done Harry sits down opposite him and says, "So now... what's wrong? I've never seen you look so emotional... so depressed."
"Well..." Draco says with a sigh. "I came here to inform my godfather of the death of my mother."
Harry is shocked at seeing all of the emotion drain from Draco's as he utters those words. 'Poor Draco... I know how much he loved his mother... she was the only thing that kept Lucius from killing him.' Harry thinks.
"Are you alright?... Do you need anything?" Harry asks.
"I am fine... I simple came to inform Severus, there isn't going to be a ceremony... she is simply going to be buried in the Malfoy family plot." Draco says stiffly while attempting to keep his emotions at bay.
"You are not fine... I can tell, do you have anyone that you can stay with? So that you're not alone... especially not at this time." Harry says while staring into Draco's eyes so that he can't lie.
"I will be staying at the Malfoy manor; there will be plenty of house elves to keep my company." Draco says attempting to avoid telling the exact truth.
"House elves don't count... I insist that you stay here, it is not right for you to be alone." Harry says while trying to emphasize that it is an order, not a suggestion.
"Where am I supposed to sleep... this place is far too small to have a guest bedroom." Draco says indignantly, not even trying to back out of staying.
"You can have the bed... I'll sleep on the futon... it folds out into a bed anyway..." Harry says happy that Draco went along with him.
"Well since it is getting late, I suppose that I shall retire then." Draco says anxious to finally be able to relax and release his emotions.
"Goodnight Draco." Harry says as he heads off to make his bed in the living room.
Sometime in the night Harry wakes and hearing noises from the bedroom rises to investigate. Upon reaching the door he realizes that the sound is coming from the form in the bed. Realizations dawn upon Harry that Draco is crying. Harry quickly walks over to the bed and takes Draco in his arms, while slowly rocking, rubbing his back, and telling him that everything will be alright. Soon Draco calms down enough to fall asleep and Harry not wanting to wake the distressed male, simply lays down holding Draco in his arms and too falls asleep.
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Severus arrived back in London and quickly apparated to the loft he shared with Harry. 'What a surprise this shall be... I know that I said I would be back a few days ago... but I couldn't get away. Now here I am back with my Harry... I can't wait to see him. He's probably asleep... I don't think I'll wake him I'll just let him wake and see me lying next to him.' Severus thinks happily to himself as he slowly and silently walks towards the bedroom.
Severus stops as he reaches the doorway and gasps as he sees two figures in the bed; that of his young lover and his godson.
Harry and Draco awoke at the sound, and Harry still half asleep and seeing Severus turns to Draco and says, "Its ok Draco just go back to sleep it's only Severus."
Severus is shocked to see them together, and at what Harry just said. 'He said he would wait for me... he said he loved me... how could he cheat on me? And with my godson!?!' He thinks frantically not even registering the fact that both the figures in bed are both fully clothed.
Severus just apparatus out of there to Snape Manor, not wanting to hear what else Harry had to say about him to his new lover. Severus collapse upon his old bed crying hysterically, and finally falls into a restless sleep.
She put him outLike the burnin end of a midnight cigarette
She broke his heart
He spent his whole life tryin to forget
The next morning Harry awoke and went to the kitchen to make himself some coffee. After finishing his first cup Harry is awake enough to realize that Severus was here last night. "Severus was here... but where is he now!?!" Harry yells. "Oh no... he saw me in bed with Draco... what must he be thinking? I have to go and talk to him."
Harry soon changes clothes and apparatus to Snape Manor, not thinking of any other place that Snape would go. He quickly walks up the steps and pounds on the door all the while calling for Severus.
A house elf named Elvis opened the door. "What do you want Mr. Harry Potter sir?" The elf asks.
"Elvis... I must speak with your master... I have to explain about what he saw... you must let me see him!" Harry says exasperated that the elf won't let him in.
"I'm sorry Mr. Harry Potter sir but Master Severus left explicit instructions when he arrived last night, that you were not to be let in the house, and under no conditions were you to be allowed to see Master Severus." The house elf says and then proceeds to slam the door in Harry's face for having hurt his master.
"NO... no, I must see Severus... Severus I'm sorry... it's not what you think..." Harry screams while pounding on the door. Seeing as he was getting no where this way, Harry decides to leave and try again later.
Severus on the other hand heard Harry's yells but refused to believe them. Severus tried to block out the sound of Harry's voice... but being too distressed to use magic, resorts to firewhiskey, that way maybe he will be able to forget Harry.
Everyone noticed that Severus was distancing himself, and was constantly drunk, but the house elves wouldn't let anyone in to see him.
We watched him drink his pain awayA little at a time
But he never could get drunk enough
To get her off his mind
Until the night...
He put that bottle to his head and pulled the trigger
And finally drank away her memory
Life is short but this time it was bigger
Than the strength he had to get up off his knees
We found him with his face down in the pillow
With a note that said, I'll love her till the day I die
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Dumbledore was sitting in the middle of his office when a strange house elf appeared. "May I help you?" he asks the little creature.
"Master Severus's head house elf Elvis, has come to inform Mr. Dumbledore that our master has passed away... We thought we could help him through his pain... but our help was not enough." The house elf says with his head hung in shame. "We would like Mr. Dumbledore... an old companion of our master to perform the ceremony as he sees fit. We shall now allow people into the house." The elf adds.
And when we buried him beneath the willowThe angels sung a whiskey lullaby
La la la la la la la
La la la la la la laa
La la la la la la la
La la la la la la laa
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"Today we lay to rest Severus Salazaar Snape a good friend and teacher. Many of you know Severus as a cold and cruel person... but in reality he was really a very kind and caring person... but he chose to help out wizarding kind by being a spy to Voldemort. If he had been his true self then the dark lord would have had him killed. I know many of you will not believe this but I will always remember the good times... a quick paced chess game in the teachers lounge... a karaoke contest on New Years... he had quite a good singing voice if you can believe it. Anyway I would like you all to remember him how he should be remembered not how he was forced to act." Dumbledore says and then turns questionably to see if anyone else would like to speak.
Harry simply stands off to the side of the whomping willow in silence. 'What could I say... no-one knew Severus like I did... and it's my fault he's dead.' Harry thinks as everyone starts to walk away.
The rumors flewBut nobody knew how much she blamed herself
'How can I ever forgive myself... there is no way that I can ever forget this.' Harry thinks as he too slowly walks away from the grave.
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"Harry..." Draco says comfortingly, "you need to pull yourself together... it wasn't your fault you have to get out of this house. Come out with me tonight... it's been 3 months you have to get out and live your life."
As Harry sits at the bar he realizes that the firewhiskey he's drinking is helping to numb the pain. 'So this is why he did it... it does help.' Harry thinks as he orders another bottle.
For years and yearsShe tried to hide the whiskey on her breath
She finally drank her pain away
A little at a time
But she never could get drunk enough
To get him off her mind
Until the night...
She put that bottle to her head and pulled the trigger
And finally drank away his memory
Life is short but this time it was bigger
Than the strength she had to get up off her knees
We found her with her face down in the pillow
Clingin to his picture for dear life
We laid her next to him beneath the willow
While angels sung a whiskey lullaby
La la la la la la la
La la la la la la laa
La la la la la la la
La la la la la la laa
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"Today we lay to rest Harry James Potter... a kind friend, caring person, and the savior of the wizarding world. Many people thought that Harry was spoiled and a fame seeker... he wasn't. Harry hated his fame more than anything... all he ever wanted to be known as was Harry... just Harry. I'll admit that I never saw it coming... but Harry's love of Severus apparently just wouldn't let him live long without his soul mate. Yes I recognized it years ago that that is what they were... they tried to hide it... Severus didn't want to tarnish Harry by having him being associated with a former death eater. Harry wouldn't say no for an answer... I don't know what happened that they separated... both refused to ever speak of it... but now I hope that they can be happy again together." Hermione says while trying with all her might trying not to cry all over her husbands shoulder.
Everyone's head is bowed with the revelation of the Harry they never knew... they just slowly walked away from the graves of the two soul mates. They graves that are forever to be guarded by the whomping willow.
At the castle gates Dumbledore turns to gaze over the graves and sees two figures slowly moving towards each other. Dumbledore then enters the castle with a knowing happy smile on his face.
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A/N: there finally finished once I got started I just couldn't quite writing... its so damn sad and fluffy.