hi everyone! this is my first fanfic so please go easy one me. I hope you enjoy.

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Those three words...

Death – it was a reminder of our own mortality. It was everywhere. Everyone was going to eventually die, some sooner then later but we had spent seven years nearly dying but always narrowly avoiding it that I had once thought it was impossible for us to die. But I was wrong. The smartest witch at Hogworts was wrong.

A glittering silver frame catches my eye as I stare at the photo on my bedside table. It's of us, the awesome threesome, Harry, Ron and I. It's just an ordinary muggle photo, Ron would have scoffed at such a boring photo but we look genuinely happy in it, the three of us briefly forgetting the dark cruel world but then we probably were happy. I had forgotten what it was to feel happy. Happiness to me was like a dream that fades away as soon as you wake up. It was a distant memory that you could only try to imagine. In that photo, Ron has his arm around me and is grinning lopsidedly. His flaming red hair radiating out from the photo and for a second I felt content. I remember being fascinated by it on my first train ride to Hogworts. How I wanted to run my hand through it but I was scared so I acted bossy and snappy. I had been afraid he would hate me and I think he did for a short period of time. I had cried then but it doesn't matter now because he will never know.

I shiver as the chilling winds sweep into the room as I try to imagine his arm pressed reassured around me. I had felt safe, where not even Voldemort could get me. And suddenly I felt a surge of emotion well up in me – anger, grief, frustration, sorrow – all combined spilled out at once.

I grabbed the photo frame and flung it across the bare room. The glass shattered but I didn't care.

"WHY DIDN'T I JUST SAY IT?" I cried angrily, the tears flowing down my face. "WHY?"

I asked myself that question everyday.

"Why? Why? Why?" I sobbed. But I didn't know the answer to that.

A hollow bitter laugh echoed and reverberated off the walls. I began to laugh maniacally and uncontrollably. Ron would laugh; Hermione Granger did not know the answer to her own question.

I crawled to the broken frame and picked it up; a jagged piece piercing my skin. The fresh scent of blood filled the room and brilliant red began to pool onto the floor but I hardly noticed as I stared at Ron in the picture. His ocean blue eyes were filled with laughter and amusement. But I didn't see them I saw a blue eyes filled with sadness and disappointment.

It was the night before the final battle. We all knew it had finally come. The battle that was going to determine the outcomes of our future, of the worlds future; muggle or magical. The three of us were silently sitting in the Gryffindor common room, waiting for dawn to come. Harry was staring at the crackling fire, mentally preparing for the battle because he knew it was all up to him, whether good or evil won. Poor Harry but he bore it well. Ron was looking at Harry and I was gazing at him, memorizing his freckles and the tousled red hair wishing I could just touch it, wishing I could just tell him.

He glanced at me and I felt my cheeks flush. He smiled. "Hermione, can I talk to you outside"

We clambered out of the portrait hole and smiled politely at the Fat Lady who was noisily weeping. As we turned a corner he stopped abruptly, faced me and said.

"I love you."

Those three words; so simple and easy to say yet held so much power.

"I didn't realize it at first but I've always loved, ever since I first saw you even if you did tell me I had dirt on my nose." He continued.

His hopeful eyes were boring into mine.

My heart was thumping wildly, my palms sweaty and I felt my stomach turn over as I registered these words. I wanted to throw myself at him and snog him senseless but I couldn't. I stood paralyzed to the spot. I couldn't form a coherent sentence as my brain failed me and my supposedly Gryffindor courage. His hopeful blue eyes now reflected disappointment and sorrow.

"It's okay. You don't have to say anything. I understand you don't feel the same way about me. I just thought since tomorrow is...that I might as well tell you...that maybe you might ...sorry. I'm sorry I said anything"

I still couldn't say anything. Inside a wave of happiness was engulfing me but outside I must have looked disgusted.

Silence consumed the corridor and finally the last thread of hope disappeared from his face as I still made no reaction and he dejectedly turned around and left. I wanted to say something, scream it out but I couldn't.

I still don't know why I didn't say anything but I would never forget the look upon his face.

The next day, the three of us stood together as the sun rose revealing hundred of death eater and Voldemort himself, in the flesh.

The final battle started. Screams, cries, tears and laughter were all mixed together in a blur. And there was blood everywhere; bright and vibrant it poured out of people like a waterfall, engulfing the whole field until it was all red.

We were fending off a few death eaters when Bellatrix Lestrange attacked Harry. Harry killed the bloody bitch but he didn't see Voldemort raising his wand, a cruel twisted smile playing at his mouth, the words eagerly waiting to be said.

But Ron saw.

Everything after that was in slow motion like in the movies when something tragic and dramatic happen. It was exactly like that.

Ron's dived in front of Harry.

"Nooooo!!" we both said in unison as the curse hit him. His body arched as he screamed.

"Nooooo! Ron!" Harry and I cried but he didn't die instantly as he was suppose to but gave us a weak smile. He looked at Harry and mumbled "Go kill the bastard!" and then turned to me and barely whispered. "I love you Hermione. I always will."

But I couldn't say anything; those three words got stuck in my throat. I was a disgrace to Gryffindor.

With one last smile he closed his eyes.

"Noo!" I whispered as the tears fell.

All this time Voldemort was throwing curses at Harry but Harry was protected not only but his mothers love but also Ron's love.

Harry slowly stood up, I could see him the fury behind his green eyes. Voldemort was now desperately flinging any curse at Harry.

"YOU KILLED MY DAD! YOU KILLED MY MUM! YOU KILLED MY GODFATHER AND YOU'VE PROBABLY KILLED MANY PEOPLE BEFORE AND AFTER THEM. AND NOW YOU KILL MY BEST FRIEND! YOU'RE GUNNA FUCKING PAY FOR THAT!" Harry screamed at Voldemort and with his wand pointed at him yelled "AVADA KEDARVA"

And that was it. The end. Good conquered evil. There was peace at last. We won but I had loss.

His disappointed face still haunts me. I had forgotten what it was to sleep and dream without nightmares. Each nightmare would be the same filled with his sorrowful face, the confession, the dejected way he walked away, him diving in front of Harry, his last words and finally the way he closed his eyes forever. Sometimes I nearly drown in my own sweat.

I sit here now, clutching the photo, crying, gazing at the happy Ron and wishing I had just said it then maybe...maybe things would be different.

If only I had. If only I could go bring you back. If only these tears could bring you back, I would tell you those three words I've always regretted not saying. Those thee words, so simple to utter, yet I held them back because...because...why? I don't even know, maybe I was scared of being happy? I don't know but those three words held so much power...

"Ron," I said to the photo, "I never told you that...that I love you."