Disclaimer: I am poor, therefore there is no way I could possibly own Gundam Wing.
If Only
Part V
By: Penybright
The sound of the doorbell startled Relena out of her funk. She picked herself up from the couch and trudged over to the door to answer it. When Relena swung the door open, Duo was standing there. When Duo saw Relena's morbid expression, he smiled, trying to lighten her mood. It didn't work so Duo thought he'd try a little humor.
"So, where's self destructo boy?"
Instead of having the intended effect, Relena broke down in tears. Duo's grin immediately disappeared, and his eyes filled with worry.
"What happened?" Duo asked quietly, dreading the answer. Relena shook her head and continued to weep.
"He... He's in the hospital," Relena managed to choke out between sobs, as Duo's heart sank.
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Why? Why wouldn't she let him go? What reason was there for him to live? Everything was gone now... He'd served his purpose, and now it was done. All he wanted was for the pain to finally end. Apparently, he couldn't even have that much. Was it really so much to ask? It wasn't as though he was begging for his life. No, he was only asking to die, to let the world be done with him.
He had given up so much, sacrificed so many things. Were his sacrifices in vain? He had suffered so that others would not. Wasn't it time that someone else took on his suffering? Why? Why had fate chosen this destiny for him? Why...
Heero's melancholy thoughts were interrupted as the door to his hospital room creaked open. Relena stepped softly into the room.
"Heero, Duo is here to see you..."
Duo walked in after Relena, surprisingly quite and subdued.
"Hey buddy," Duo said, his usual cheer missing.
"Go away."
"Same old Heero," Duo laughed halfheartedly. A pained smile quirked at Relena's lips.
"He won't talk to anyone," Relena explained. "He usually doesn't even acknowledged that you're there. He spends all day staring out the window, or at the ceiling," Relena paused before going on. "I wish I knew what he was thinking."
"Don't we all," Duo sighed. "What do the doctors have to say?"
"Nothing much, really. Heero has to put some effort forth, or he'll never recover. The doctors can only do so much with medications."
Heero listened to the two of them talk about him as if he weren't there, impassively. They wanted to know what he was thinking? He was thinking that life was a curse, his in particular. He wanted to die, but something wouldn't let him.
"Perhaps I'm meant to suffer more..." He mused aloud, without realizing it. Duo and Relena stopped talking and looked at him with concern.
"Maybe you better tell me how this whole thing started," Duo said while ushering Relena out of the room.
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Heero was once again left alone with his thoughts as the two left. Everything became deathly quite once more. Heero liked the silence. He glanced down at his bandaged writs, looking at them with curiosity. His attempt to escape had been foiled, but he wasn't going to give up so easily. Heero was persistent, and very stubborn. He'd just have to try harder.
Left alone in his solitude, Heero began to work over other plans of escape. He knew that his friends would never allow him to elude them. Didn't they understand? Why were they making him suffer? What more could possibly be needed of him? There had to be a way to escape the pain...
~ I know it's not that great... I personally think this chapter is sort of disappointing. Anyway, at least I finally got one of the pilots in. The rest of them will be popping up in the next few chapters.