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A/N-Buahaha. Didn't think I'd ever get around to updating this story did ya?.
Chapter key Italics are dreamsChapter 2: Lost tears and hidden sorrow.
Inuyasha walked with his eyes to the ground. Something felt off today, something just didn't feel right.
Sometime around noon, it was if this stab of pain, and emptiness, filled his whole being, and he couldn't seem to shake that feeling off.
Looking up he realized that all of his companions had stopped and were now staring at him.
Narrowing his eyes Inuyasha glared "What!?" he growled in irritation.
They all jumped looking at his sudden outburst, and diverted their eyes.
Kagome sighed. "It's nothing Inuyasha, god forbid we were worried about you or anything." She said rolling her eyes.
"Feh." Was Inuyasha blunt reply as he crossed his arms.
"How about we make camp here tonight?" Sango suggested breaking the tension.
"Sure, whatever." Inuyasha replied as he jumped up into the nearest tree.
"Grouch" Shippou muttered under his breathe, and then promptly 'eeped' and scurried behind Kagome as Inuyasha threw a few acorns at him.
Shaking her head in annoyance Kagome dropped her backpack and pulled out her sleeping bag.
Miroku chuckled at the scene, and turned around just in time to see Sango bent over.
Grinning madly he 'oh so innocently' let his hand wander towards her but.
"Do you want to live another day, Houshi?" came Sango's menacing voice before his hand ever reached her.
A cold sweat fell over Miroku. Was Sango now actually able to sense him about to grope her before it even happened? Would he ever be able to grope her again without fearing for his life!?
The thought frightened him…
'Then again…' Miroku thought grinning as he reached down and groped her anyways.
If he was going to die, he'd die a happy man indeed!
The thud of Hiraikotsu connecting with Miroku's head thudded through the dark forest, sending small creatures running in all directions.
Miroku lay unconscious on the ground, a grin plastered to his face.
"Baka Houshi, can't keep his lecherous hand to himself." Sango mumbled to herself irritably.
Kagome laughed lightly at this as she climbed into her sleeping bag, and dozed off with Shippou at her side.
-;-
Inuyasha sat in the tree, his back against the trunk, looking up at the stars.
He still felt like something was amiss, but he couldn't figure out exactly what.
Feeling his eyes droop a bit, Inuyasha fought to keep his eyes open, but in the end lost the battle and dozed off
Dream
Light twinkled all around Inuyasha, as it seemed as if he were standing in the night sky itself.
He was facing North, then he turned and was facing East, and then South. Following his instinct he turned to the West, and began walking.
He didn't know why, but this seemed the right direction to head in.
As he continued walking, soon he saw something in the distance. A figure, huddled on the ground, as if they were in pain.
And the closer he got to the figure, the more a sense of dread built in the pit of his stomach.
And soon, he saw them clearly.
"Mother.." he whispered so softly it was barely audible, even to his own sensitive ears.
"Mother!" He cried out as he ran the rest of the short distance from where he had been, to her.
She was kneeling on the ground, blood pooling around her, from various wounds that adorned her body.
It was odd though. The blood had a sort of imaginary sense to it, like it wasn't quite there, yet clearly it was…
Looking up the woman smiled.
"Inuyasha. My sweet child." She said, pain evident in her eyes.
"Don't speak!" Inuyasha commanded out of concern, and was surprised when she hugged him.
"You've grown up, and become such a handsome young man, I'm proud" she said weakly, looking into his eyes.
Tears brimmed in Inuyasha's eyes.
"What happened to you? Why are you like this mother?" he asked, his voice cracking.
She frowned.
"Inuyasha, do not remorse over me. As you know, I'm already dead, I have been for quite some time now." She said.
"Then how can you be like this!? In this condition!?" He hollered.
"This is my soul you're seeing dear. I was attacked, and used the last of my strength to visit you here, in your dreams. I'm afraid this is the last time you'll ever be able to see me again. Even after you enter the afterlife." She explained sadly.
Inuyasha growled.
Some one had attacked his mother's soul. Even in death she was not safe!
"I'll kill them.." Inuyasha said quietly, yet his voice was full of anger.
His mother winced.
"He has already died, my son. Besides, killing will not save me. But, I just want you to remember, I will be always be a part of you here." She said pressing her palm to his heart.
"And I hope one day, you'll share me with some one wonderful." She said.
Inuyasha clenched his fists. How could some one do this to his mother? Why would they!? What reason would they have!?"
Seeming to understand what was going through his mind, Inuyasha's mother sighed.
"I was the guardian.." she spoke, but then began coughing violently.
"Mother!" Inuyasha said urgently as he watched.
"My time here is soon to pass Inuyasha. But you must, you must be wary for it lies in the hands of evil." She said as she began fading in and out of existence.
"What? What is in the hand of evil?" Inuyasha questioned, panicking.
"Life book…" She whispered as she faded into nothing.
Inuyasha sat there, feeling empty.
The entire time, he had felt so warm, in his mother's embrace. But now, now that she was truly gone. That cold, empty-ness that had invaded his senses earlier that day had come back. Come back about 100 times worse.
Shivering Inuyasha wrapped his arms around his legs and curled up into a little ball crying silently.
In a sense, he looked just like the little lost child he had been many years ago when he first lost his mother…
End Dream
Inuyasha woke up to something wet rolling down his cheek.
Knowing exactly what it was, he quickly whipped the tear away and crossed his arms stubbornly.
He knew that wasn't just some dream. Well, it may have been, but it was also really at the same time.
He knew, because the cold emptiness still clutched onto his being. He'd never see his mother again, not even in the after life, and the thought made him want to cry like a child.
But no, he wouldn't. He was too strong for that; he wouldn't let the others know that he could, would cry…
The smell of ramen bellow signaled to him that the others were already awake, and eating breakfast.
Hopping down from the tree he saw that his assumption was correct.
Seeing Inuyasha hop down from the tree Kagome smiled and waved him over. "I've got your favorite ramen waiting for you!" she said happily as he walked towards her.
But instead of sitting down next to her, and scarfing the ramen, he walked past her.
"Eh..?" Kagome uttered in confusion.
"Inuya-"
"I'll be back in a while. Eat with out me." Inuyasha said cutting her off as he walked away, his eyes hidden behind his bangs.
Everyone just sat there in stunned silence.
Inuyasha, had just turned down his favorite ramen.. Something was seriously wrong.
"Sango can sense me about to group her! Inuyasha's turning down ramen!!! Next Shippou will declare his undying love for me! Is there no sanity in this universe!? Is the apocalypse really coming!!!?" Miroku cried out hysterically.
Sango, Kagome, Shippou, and Kirara all stared at him like he was psycho.
"Or maybe not…?" Miroku said laughing lightly.
"I'm going to go see what's bothering him." Kagome said as she stood up, and walked off in the direction that Inuyasha had gone.
-;-
Inuyasha stood in front of a small lake, staring at his reflection.
He still looked the same. Didn't look any different. Though, it was hard as hell to keep the look of remorse off of his face.
He wouldn't cry, wouldn't show how much he was hurting, he was too strong for that.
Inuyasha thinned his lips straight, trying his best to hide the frown of sorrow.
The scene just kept replaying in his head.
Why? Why did he have to lose his mother twice? What had he done to anger the gods so?
Inuyasha watched as his face twisted into that of a depressed hanyou. And then, behind his reflection, a reflection of Kagome appeared.
Turning around he did his best to hide his emotions and looked at her calmly.
"Inuyasha… what's wrong?" She asked in a concerned voice.
Inuyasha mentally cursed himself. They had already figured out that something was wrong. And it probably didn't help that he had skipped breakfast.
"Feh, nothing." He replied blandly.
Kagome nit her eyebrows. "Inuyasha, don't tell me it was nothing." She responded.
'But it was!" he argued, his anger taking control. He was good at that, masking his other emotions with anger.
"Don't lie to me Inuyasha!" Kagome yelled.
"Feh. Are you talking about me not eating the ramen. God, girls.. They get so worried over nothing. Am I not allowed to not be hungry?" he said in and annoyed tone
"But it's not just that Inuyasha. I saw the way you looked when you left camp. I saw the way your face reflected sorrow into the water. Don't tell me it's nothing!" She said in a concerned voice.
"But it is nothing!" Inuyasha yelled, as he had Kagome backed against a tree, his arms on either side of her.
Kagome's breathe caught in her throat as Inuyasha's piercing golden eyes gazed into her own blue gray ones.
They were so close, their mouths mere inches away from each other. Kagome unconsciously licked her dry lips, and Inuyasha's eyes were drawn to them.
Kagome's held her breath as she noticed this. They were so close. Would he kiss her?
He wanted to so badly. He had wanted to for a long time. Just one little, chaste kiss, that was all. Inuyasha leaned in, their lips now hardly a few centimeters away from each other's when it hit him.
"But, I just want you to remember, I will be always be a part of you here." She said pressing her palm to his heart.
"And I hope one day, you'll share me with some one wonderful."
The thought caused Inuyasha to step back and shake his head. No, he couldn't, he wouldn't cry! Especially in front of Kagome.
"Kagome gasped as Inuyasha pulled away, a pained expression marring his face. She didn't know what was making him so sad, and she didn't know why he hid his sorrows, how his tears had some how lost their way, and never left his eyes, but seeing him like this, made her want to cry herself.
Bowing her head and looking down Kagome smiled sadly.
"I'm going to head back to camp now. See you there soon." She said as she turned and began walking away. If Inuyasha didn't want to share his troubles with her, then she wasn't going to be one to make him.
Inuyasha looked up at Kagome's retreating figure. He had just made her think that he was going to kiss her, and then turned around and didn't.
He knew she understood. And he was grateful for it.
"Hey, Kagome. Wait up!" He called as he ran and caught up with her.
From now on he absolutely would not show his sorrow in front of her, or any one else for that matter. They didn't need to bear his burdens. In the mean while, they could get back to hunting jewel shards.
A/N- Wow. That almost sounds like and ending to the story. Lol. Well it isn't. In fact it's just beginning (obvious). Look forward to new chapters. Eventually..
AngelWingsbaka
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