Disclaimer: As usual, I don't own Sailor Moon, never have and never will.
Author's note: Please don't be too harsh. Any questions, just e-mail me.
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The chatting voices flew over the top of Haruka Tenoh's head as she nursed the scotch in her hands and stared out of the window at the bright lights of Tokyo City. This was going to be the last night that she would be in Japan and here she was, stuck at Michiru' Kaioh's engagement party.
Haruka winced slightly at the thought and gulped down the rest of the brown liquid, recoiling at the taste. Usually, she didn't drink anything stronger than beer but tonight was a special occasion. the day that her heart officially shattered into a minion pieces. Her dark green eyes turned back to Usagi, who was now chatting blissfully about how Chibi-Usa had taken her first steps earlier that day. A sad smile adorned Haruka's features as she realized what she would be missing by going to Australia to work for Qantas. 'At least now I'm as close to the wind and the sky as physically possible.' She reasoned when she felt a strong hand on her shoulder. Mamoru's hand fell back down to his side as he passed her and after giving his wife a kiss and held up his hand to Haruka, signaling that he was going to help the other guys set up for the ex-racer's farewell party.
One last trip to the local pub for a round of drinks.
Haruka motioned the action of a pistol with her own hand and shook her head with a smirk on her face. The other five women who were still present looked at the blonde pilot with sadness on their faces, not being able to say goodbye to her properly. She had given everyone strict instructions that she didn't want to see any of them at the airport the next morning. At seeing everyone's sadness, Haruka forced a smile,
"I probably should be following Mamoru-kun or they will most likely start without me." She chuckled slightly before Usagi gave her friend a comforting hug, tears starting to fall from her eyes.
"I'll miss you Haru-kun. I'll be expecting lots of letters from you." She said as Haruka stepped back, a grin on her face.
"Only if you send me pictures of the small lady, Usa-chan."
Usagi smiled as well,
"Deal."
Suddenly Haruka found a charm around her neck and Rei by her side,
"You deserve good fortune wherever you go Haru-kun." She said and was rewarded with a hug around her shoulders.
"Thanks Rei-chan." Haruka replied and almost took Rei with her when Minako jumped onto her back and made the blonde stumble forward.
"Mina-chan, get off Haru-kun this instant!" scolded the unmistakable voice of Ami Mizuno, the brains of the group. She and Makoto were obviously embarrassed at the younger woman's behaviour,
"Oh, but this is the last time we get to see Haru-kun!" Minako groaned back, slipping off Haruka's back and almost took the taller woman's suit jacket with her. Haruka turned to the smaller blonde and out a reassuring hand on her shoulder,
"Maybe you'll get that modeling shoot in Brisbane early next year and I could show you around." Haruka spoke and raised her eyebrows suggestively, earning herself a smack on the arm before she was assaulted with a hug.
*Cough*
*Ahem*
"Mina-chan, some of us would like to say goodbye to Haru-kun before you've squeezed the life out of her." Makoto growled, earning herself Ami's elbow in her ribs. Minako simply blushed and stepped over to where Usagi and Rei were.
"Thanks for everything Haru-kun.' The brown haired girl said as she shook Haruka's hand, knowing how uncomfortable the blonde could get with constant hugging.
"It wasn't anything special I did you two. I simply helped out two good friends." Haruka shrugged it off, then found herself in Ami's arms.
"If it weren't for you Haru-kun, Mako and I would still be miserable." She said as she stepped back into her girlfriend's embrace.
"What could I do? You two were so stubborn I was getting frustrated." She joked before saying one last goodbye to all her good friends,
"I'll mail you when I get there." She called back to the group before setting out to find her parents, the Kaioh's and the future bride and groom.
"How do you think she'll go?" Ami asked, looking up into Makoto's emerald eyes, who simply sighed.
"She loves flying more than she values her own life." She replied and frowned when Usagi added,
"But she did. uh does love Michiru-san more than she does flying."
"I don't feel that anything bad will happen to Haru-kun. She is a strong one." Rei said to which everyone else nodded.
"Bye Mom, bye Dad, I'm off." Haruka said casually to her parents, who were talking to Mr. and Mrs. Kaioh.
"Hey, is that anyway to say goodbye sweetie? Give your mother a hug." Mrs. Tenoh reprimanded as she wrapped her arms around her daughter, not wanting to believe that she would no longer be in the same country.
Haruka hesitantly returned the hug before replying,
"As you said Mom, I'm no further than a 24 hour plane ride away."
She pulled away from her mother and enveloped her father in a bear hug,
"I'll be seeing ya Papa bear." Haruka whispered and heard her father's response,
"I've always been proud of you Possum, I hope now you'll be proud of yourself." His chuckle could be heard as they pulled away, "Maybe that's why you chose Australia, you wanted to be closer to your fellow kind." He joked as he pulled his daughter's tie tight around her neck.
"I wouldn't start old man." Haruka grumbled as she straightened her tie and bowed to the Kaioh's.
"Thank you for inviting me tonight. I'm sorry to be leaving so early but my friends want to send me off the right way and I have an early start in the morning."
Mr. Kaioh put his hand up to her and chuckled,
"Enough with the excuses, Haruka-chan. We're all just glad that you were able to find the time to come. I know that it means a great deal to Michi- chan that you could, even if she hasn't spoken more than four words to you the entire time."
'Yeah, she's been too busy pretending to be Mrs. Seiya Kou.' Haruka thought bitterly as she remembered how her best friend had only greeted her at the front door then quickly went to entertain Kou-san's friends.
"It's just a shame that you can't make it to the wedding as well. I'm surprised she's taken it so well Haruka-chan." Mrs. Kaioh said, a sad look on her face, Haruka wincing at the fact that she hadn't said anything to Michiru, "Are you sure that you can't make it?"
'Why can't they just let me die in piece?' the blonde thought as she sighed,
"I'll see Kaioh-san but I don't think I'll be able to."
The Kaioh's nodded and wished Haruka luck before letting her go, asking one of the servants to call for a taxi. Haruka found the happy couple to some of Seiya's recording managers. well 'happy' might not be the best way of describing it. Seiya was beaming as he talked; his hand wrapped possessively around Michiru's waist, the other half simply had a false smile plastered on her face and was looking around her, seeming to be searching for someone. Taking a deep breath, straightening her navy suit jacket and blinking away the tears that had begun forming in her eyes, Haruka walked up to stand beside Seiya and coughed into her hand. This brought the pop star's attention to her and tried not to glare at her or gloat in front of Michiru.
"I'm sorry to interrupt Kou-san but I really must be leaving." She said as they shook hands and swallowed hard before saying,
"I wish you both all the happiness in the world."
"Thank you Tenoh-san." Seiya replied as they both dropped their hands, "When you see my wayward brothers, tell them that they are doing me a favor by leaving with you. but that I will miss them."
At his words Haruka nodded, only intending to tell Yaten and Taiki the last part of his message and turned to walk towards the door.
"It's just a shame that you won't be able to make it to your wedding, ne Michi-chan?" Seiya called out to her, a smirk on his face. Haruka stopped dead in her tracks and turned her head slightly, just allowing her to see the look of shock, betrayal and hurt on her best friend's face.
"I'm sorry Kaioh-san." She muttered before walking out the door, ignoring the looks that everyone directed at her. Walking past the entrance hall table, Haruka pulled out a pearl white envelope out of her inside pocket and placed it with the other letters, the elegant handwriting spelling out 'Kaioh Michiru-san' in the hope that she would get it. The former racer exited the town house with no one noticing, or so she thought until she stepped out of the gate, not looking back, and heard the melodic voice calling out,
"Haruka, wait!"
Haruka frowned slightly at the lack of suffix but just stood there and turned to look at Michiru. who had the open letter in her hand.
'Oh fucking hell!' the blonde screamed to herself.
"Ruka-chan, why didn't you tell me?" Michiru asked, her hand reaching out to her friend's arm to keep her there.
"I knew that it would hurt you too much if I told you I couldn't make the wedding." Haruka replied, pulling back from the inviting hand. A look of sadness flashed over the aqua haired young woman as she saw this movement.
"You didn't have to take the job with Qantas, all of the Japanese airlines wanted you. That way you could have been here." she trailed off as she looked, shocked, at the tears that were gathering in the corners of those deep green orbs.
'So what she said in the letter was true.'
Haruka swallowed hard and wished the tears away before she poke,
"Yes I do Kaioh-san. It's time for me to move on, for me to get on with my life. I'm stuck here with all my childhood friends and." she hesitated before taking a deep breath,
"It's pulling me down, I need to get out of here. I have nothing keeping me here anymore."
Haruka winced as she saw her love take a half step backwards at her words.
"You can't mean that!" Michiru whispered, the blonde in front of her almost missing the words, "What about the girls, Mamoru-san and Motoki-san. What about me?" by the end of her rant, Michiru's voice was just short of a scream and was pleading with the person in front of her. Haruka sighed as two tears rolled down her cheeks.
"Usa-chan and Mamoru-kun have each other and Chibi-Usa now. They haven't done much with the rest of us since high school. Same goes with Ami-chan and Mako-chan, they don't give me the time of day! Motoki-kun and Mina-chan only associated with me because I shared their interest in arcade games. Rei-chan was probably the only one out of the whole group who could understand what I was going through." A huge sigh emerged from Haruka's throat as she ground the tears out of her eyes and continued,
"Maybe I should have bothered talking to her more and we could have shared this loneliness but even she has the constant support of the girls. Don't get me wrong, I love them all but I've always been an outsider. The only two who have ever given a flying fuck about me are going to be on that plane with me tomorrow. I thank God everyday that I've got at least two good friends. I can't think of anyone else who would forsake their own brother for the sake of their friend except for Yaten and Taiki. But even they don't fully understand me." by this time Haruka was shouting at the woman in front of her, tears falling freely down from her now bloodshot eyes. Her breath coming in shaky sobs, Haruka was just thankful that no one else was there to see the 'impenetrable rock' blubbering like a little baby,
"And you."
Michiru took another half step back at the coldness that was radiating from Haruka's teal eyes, "If you've read the letter then you know why I have to leave. And that I'm destined to continue to live my life alone, just trying to survive."
At her words, Michiru swallowed the lump in her throat and hugged the taller woman with everything that she had,
"But you shouldn't have to just survive Ruka-chan. You deserve better than that." She sobbed, trying to calm her friend down, who was trying to gulp air into her lungs.
"I may deserve better Kaioh-san but I know that it is my lot in life to survive. Some people have their lives as a challenge and to touch people's lives for the better and not receive anything in return. I know that God had chosen my life to be like this and I accept that."
"Please don't cry." Pleaded Michiru as she rubbed her back, "I can't stand seeing you like this."
Haruka pulled out of the comforting embrace and wiped her eyes with the back of her sleeve.
"How do you want me to leave then Kaioh-san?" she demanded, "With me to plaster a smile on my face and leave like my heart isn't shattering into a million pieces? I'll leave any way you want me to. I only want you to be happy Michi-chan." Haruka choked out, sobs overcoming her body again and she sunk down to her knees, hugging herself, trying to be rid of the excruciating pain that was throbbing in her chest. Michiru simply stood there, dumbfounded. In all her life she had only heard about and seen the joyful side of love, but now here was her best friend in pain from this same love.
'Stop this Haruka!' the blonde scolded herself, 'This is getting you no where and the guys are waiting.'
Taking a shaky breath, Haruka pushed herself off the ground and looked down the road, seeing a taxi at the corner.
"Sayonara Michiru. Ai shiteru." Haruka whispered, glancing back for a second as she ran off towards the waiting taxi, ignoring the cries behind her.
"I'll spend the rest of my life Trying to walk forward but still looking back
One more regret added to the list
I know that I have to leave
Now that I've taken one more glance at you."
- One More Glance- by Sam Makin
Author's note: Please don't be too harsh. Any questions, just e-mail me.
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The chatting voices flew over the top of Haruka Tenoh's head as she nursed the scotch in her hands and stared out of the window at the bright lights of Tokyo City. This was going to be the last night that she would be in Japan and here she was, stuck at Michiru' Kaioh's engagement party.
Haruka winced slightly at the thought and gulped down the rest of the brown liquid, recoiling at the taste. Usually, she didn't drink anything stronger than beer but tonight was a special occasion. the day that her heart officially shattered into a minion pieces. Her dark green eyes turned back to Usagi, who was now chatting blissfully about how Chibi-Usa had taken her first steps earlier that day. A sad smile adorned Haruka's features as she realized what she would be missing by going to Australia to work for Qantas. 'At least now I'm as close to the wind and the sky as physically possible.' She reasoned when she felt a strong hand on her shoulder. Mamoru's hand fell back down to his side as he passed her and after giving his wife a kiss and held up his hand to Haruka, signaling that he was going to help the other guys set up for the ex-racer's farewell party.
One last trip to the local pub for a round of drinks.
Haruka motioned the action of a pistol with her own hand and shook her head with a smirk on her face. The other five women who were still present looked at the blonde pilot with sadness on their faces, not being able to say goodbye to her properly. She had given everyone strict instructions that she didn't want to see any of them at the airport the next morning. At seeing everyone's sadness, Haruka forced a smile,
"I probably should be following Mamoru-kun or they will most likely start without me." She chuckled slightly before Usagi gave her friend a comforting hug, tears starting to fall from her eyes.
"I'll miss you Haru-kun. I'll be expecting lots of letters from you." She said as Haruka stepped back, a grin on her face.
"Only if you send me pictures of the small lady, Usa-chan."
Usagi smiled as well,
"Deal."
Suddenly Haruka found a charm around her neck and Rei by her side,
"You deserve good fortune wherever you go Haru-kun." She said and was rewarded with a hug around her shoulders.
"Thanks Rei-chan." Haruka replied and almost took Rei with her when Minako jumped onto her back and made the blonde stumble forward.
"Mina-chan, get off Haru-kun this instant!" scolded the unmistakable voice of Ami Mizuno, the brains of the group. She and Makoto were obviously embarrassed at the younger woman's behaviour,
"Oh, but this is the last time we get to see Haru-kun!" Minako groaned back, slipping off Haruka's back and almost took the taller woman's suit jacket with her. Haruka turned to the smaller blonde and out a reassuring hand on her shoulder,
"Maybe you'll get that modeling shoot in Brisbane early next year and I could show you around." Haruka spoke and raised her eyebrows suggestively, earning herself a smack on the arm before she was assaulted with a hug.
*Cough*
*Ahem*
"Mina-chan, some of us would like to say goodbye to Haru-kun before you've squeezed the life out of her." Makoto growled, earning herself Ami's elbow in her ribs. Minako simply blushed and stepped over to where Usagi and Rei were.
"Thanks for everything Haru-kun.' The brown haired girl said as she shook Haruka's hand, knowing how uncomfortable the blonde could get with constant hugging.
"It wasn't anything special I did you two. I simply helped out two good friends." Haruka shrugged it off, then found herself in Ami's arms.
"If it weren't for you Haru-kun, Mako and I would still be miserable." She said as she stepped back into her girlfriend's embrace.
"What could I do? You two were so stubborn I was getting frustrated." She joked before saying one last goodbye to all her good friends,
"I'll mail you when I get there." She called back to the group before setting out to find her parents, the Kaioh's and the future bride and groom.
"How do you think she'll go?" Ami asked, looking up into Makoto's emerald eyes, who simply sighed.
"She loves flying more than she values her own life." She replied and frowned when Usagi added,
"But she did. uh does love Michiru-san more than she does flying."
"I don't feel that anything bad will happen to Haru-kun. She is a strong one." Rei said to which everyone else nodded.
"Bye Mom, bye Dad, I'm off." Haruka said casually to her parents, who were talking to Mr. and Mrs. Kaioh.
"Hey, is that anyway to say goodbye sweetie? Give your mother a hug." Mrs. Tenoh reprimanded as she wrapped her arms around her daughter, not wanting to believe that she would no longer be in the same country.
Haruka hesitantly returned the hug before replying,
"As you said Mom, I'm no further than a 24 hour plane ride away."
She pulled away from her mother and enveloped her father in a bear hug,
"I'll be seeing ya Papa bear." Haruka whispered and heard her father's response,
"I've always been proud of you Possum, I hope now you'll be proud of yourself." His chuckle could be heard as they pulled away, "Maybe that's why you chose Australia, you wanted to be closer to your fellow kind." He joked as he pulled his daughter's tie tight around her neck.
"I wouldn't start old man." Haruka grumbled as she straightened her tie and bowed to the Kaioh's.
"Thank you for inviting me tonight. I'm sorry to be leaving so early but my friends want to send me off the right way and I have an early start in the morning."
Mr. Kaioh put his hand up to her and chuckled,
"Enough with the excuses, Haruka-chan. We're all just glad that you were able to find the time to come. I know that it means a great deal to Michi- chan that you could, even if she hasn't spoken more than four words to you the entire time."
'Yeah, she's been too busy pretending to be Mrs. Seiya Kou.' Haruka thought bitterly as she remembered how her best friend had only greeted her at the front door then quickly went to entertain Kou-san's friends.
"It's just a shame that you can't make it to the wedding as well. I'm surprised she's taken it so well Haruka-chan." Mrs. Kaioh said, a sad look on her face, Haruka wincing at the fact that she hadn't said anything to Michiru, "Are you sure that you can't make it?"
'Why can't they just let me die in piece?' the blonde thought as she sighed,
"I'll see Kaioh-san but I don't think I'll be able to."
The Kaioh's nodded and wished Haruka luck before letting her go, asking one of the servants to call for a taxi. Haruka found the happy couple to some of Seiya's recording managers. well 'happy' might not be the best way of describing it. Seiya was beaming as he talked; his hand wrapped possessively around Michiru's waist, the other half simply had a false smile plastered on her face and was looking around her, seeming to be searching for someone. Taking a deep breath, straightening her navy suit jacket and blinking away the tears that had begun forming in her eyes, Haruka walked up to stand beside Seiya and coughed into her hand. This brought the pop star's attention to her and tried not to glare at her or gloat in front of Michiru.
"I'm sorry to interrupt Kou-san but I really must be leaving." She said as they shook hands and swallowed hard before saying,
"I wish you both all the happiness in the world."
"Thank you Tenoh-san." Seiya replied as they both dropped their hands, "When you see my wayward brothers, tell them that they are doing me a favor by leaving with you. but that I will miss them."
At his words Haruka nodded, only intending to tell Yaten and Taiki the last part of his message and turned to walk towards the door.
"It's just a shame that you won't be able to make it to your wedding, ne Michi-chan?" Seiya called out to her, a smirk on his face. Haruka stopped dead in her tracks and turned her head slightly, just allowing her to see the look of shock, betrayal and hurt on her best friend's face.
"I'm sorry Kaioh-san." She muttered before walking out the door, ignoring the looks that everyone directed at her. Walking past the entrance hall table, Haruka pulled out a pearl white envelope out of her inside pocket and placed it with the other letters, the elegant handwriting spelling out 'Kaioh Michiru-san' in the hope that she would get it. The former racer exited the town house with no one noticing, or so she thought until she stepped out of the gate, not looking back, and heard the melodic voice calling out,
"Haruka, wait!"
Haruka frowned slightly at the lack of suffix but just stood there and turned to look at Michiru. who had the open letter in her hand.
'Oh fucking hell!' the blonde screamed to herself.
"Ruka-chan, why didn't you tell me?" Michiru asked, her hand reaching out to her friend's arm to keep her there.
"I knew that it would hurt you too much if I told you I couldn't make the wedding." Haruka replied, pulling back from the inviting hand. A look of sadness flashed over the aqua haired young woman as she saw this movement.
"You didn't have to take the job with Qantas, all of the Japanese airlines wanted you. That way you could have been here." she trailed off as she looked, shocked, at the tears that were gathering in the corners of those deep green orbs.
'So what she said in the letter was true.'
Haruka swallowed hard and wished the tears away before she poke,
"Yes I do Kaioh-san. It's time for me to move on, for me to get on with my life. I'm stuck here with all my childhood friends and." she hesitated before taking a deep breath,
"It's pulling me down, I need to get out of here. I have nothing keeping me here anymore."
Haruka winced as she saw her love take a half step backwards at her words.
"You can't mean that!" Michiru whispered, the blonde in front of her almost missing the words, "What about the girls, Mamoru-san and Motoki-san. What about me?" by the end of her rant, Michiru's voice was just short of a scream and was pleading with the person in front of her. Haruka sighed as two tears rolled down her cheeks.
"Usa-chan and Mamoru-kun have each other and Chibi-Usa now. They haven't done much with the rest of us since high school. Same goes with Ami-chan and Mako-chan, they don't give me the time of day! Motoki-kun and Mina-chan only associated with me because I shared their interest in arcade games. Rei-chan was probably the only one out of the whole group who could understand what I was going through." A huge sigh emerged from Haruka's throat as she ground the tears out of her eyes and continued,
"Maybe I should have bothered talking to her more and we could have shared this loneliness but even she has the constant support of the girls. Don't get me wrong, I love them all but I've always been an outsider. The only two who have ever given a flying fuck about me are going to be on that plane with me tomorrow. I thank God everyday that I've got at least two good friends. I can't think of anyone else who would forsake their own brother for the sake of their friend except for Yaten and Taiki. But even they don't fully understand me." by this time Haruka was shouting at the woman in front of her, tears falling freely down from her now bloodshot eyes. Her breath coming in shaky sobs, Haruka was just thankful that no one else was there to see the 'impenetrable rock' blubbering like a little baby,
"And you."
Michiru took another half step back at the coldness that was radiating from Haruka's teal eyes, "If you've read the letter then you know why I have to leave. And that I'm destined to continue to live my life alone, just trying to survive."
At her words, Michiru swallowed the lump in her throat and hugged the taller woman with everything that she had,
"But you shouldn't have to just survive Ruka-chan. You deserve better than that." She sobbed, trying to calm her friend down, who was trying to gulp air into her lungs.
"I may deserve better Kaioh-san but I know that it is my lot in life to survive. Some people have their lives as a challenge and to touch people's lives for the better and not receive anything in return. I know that God had chosen my life to be like this and I accept that."
"Please don't cry." Pleaded Michiru as she rubbed her back, "I can't stand seeing you like this."
Haruka pulled out of the comforting embrace and wiped her eyes with the back of her sleeve.
"How do you want me to leave then Kaioh-san?" she demanded, "With me to plaster a smile on my face and leave like my heart isn't shattering into a million pieces? I'll leave any way you want me to. I only want you to be happy Michi-chan." Haruka choked out, sobs overcoming her body again and she sunk down to her knees, hugging herself, trying to be rid of the excruciating pain that was throbbing in her chest. Michiru simply stood there, dumbfounded. In all her life she had only heard about and seen the joyful side of love, but now here was her best friend in pain from this same love.
'Stop this Haruka!' the blonde scolded herself, 'This is getting you no where and the guys are waiting.'
Taking a shaky breath, Haruka pushed herself off the ground and looked down the road, seeing a taxi at the corner.
"Sayonara Michiru. Ai shiteru." Haruka whispered, glancing back for a second as she ran off towards the waiting taxi, ignoring the cries behind her.
"I'll spend the rest of my life Trying to walk forward but still looking back
One more regret added to the list
I know that I have to leave
Now that I've taken one more glance at you."
- One More Glance- by Sam Makin