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Chapter 17
"What do you mean get this over with" said Gordo.
"You know what I mean Gordo; we have to talk about what happened yesterday. Even though this is not the ideal time to talk about something this serious at seven in the morning, and I really don't want to talk about it, but I guess we have to" said Miranda clearly angry and upset.
"Look Miranda, I'm sorry I am here so early but I didn't sleep a wink last night because my mind and my heart would not allow me too. Miranda what happened yesterday...I mean I had no idea that Lizzie was going to do that. We were making small talk about what happened between her and Jason and the next thing I know she is kissing me" said Gordo in a hurry.
"Miranda you have to understand that I never intended to hurt you, I would never do anything like this...ever. I love you too much and I value this relationship. I would do anything to take back what happened yesterday....but I can't, and I'm sorry for that" he said.
She stood there looking at him, motionless. For awhile she just starred into his eyes and then she broke her concentration and looked at the yard for awhile before responding.
"Gordo do you realize that my worst nightmare came true yesterday. I had to witness the man I love kissing another girl. Not just any girl but Lizzie. Lizzie of all people!" she said angrily.
"Miranda she kissed me, I didn't kiss her!" he partly yelled.
"Gordo you didn't see yourself, you kissed her back! And somehow I already think you are aware of this. Or else you would not have chased me home yesterday. Gordo you kissed her back....and that really hurt. That hurt more than her initiating anything" she said almost in tears.
"Miranda please don't cry, I can't stand to see you cry. I would have chased you home for any reason if I know you're upset. Miranda you have to believe me, I didn't kiss her back, Lizzie started the whole thing...she did Miranda. You have to believe me!" he said with the sound of hurt in his voice.
By now tears of pain and anger were coming down her face. Gordo went up to her to wipe them away. While wiping the tears away he caressed her face but she jerked it away.
"Gordo don't do that. I don't want you to touch me, I feel like I can't trust you anymore" she said still crying.
"What do you mean you can't trust me" he said.
He lifts her face with his hand so they are face to face. "You have to believe me beautiful" he said.
She looks at him in his deep blue eyes. Uncertainty written all over her face, she examines him. She kept looking into his eyes to search his soul. Never had Gordo ever lied to her about anything, so she had to believe him, she had to trust in him. But something deep inside could not allow that.
"Gordo you never lied to me about anything in our lives. And I don't think you would lie to me about something like this" she said.
"That's what I have been trying to tell you" he said with a hint of relief.
"I'm not finish. Gordo you never lied to me about anything because you were always sure that you knew the truth" she said.
"I don't understand" he said looking confused.
"Gordo you said that Lizzie initiated the kiss and I believe you about that part. Gordo I was there from the beginning. Jason and I turned the corner and saw you two talking before anything happened. Then I saw her lean in and kiss you....and I saw you lean into her and kiss her back" she said.
"That's not what happened Miranda!" yelled Gordo.
"Gordo I know what my eyes saw and they saw you kiss her back. That's why I screamed, my worst fear came true. Gordo you kissed her back, you have to stop lying to yourself. You owe yourself the truth, not only yourself but me" she said choking up. "Just think about it, recalculate everything in your head then look at me and honestly say that you didn't kiss her back and I will believe you" she said fully crying.
Gordo stood back and leaned on the porch, the past events clearly going back and forth in his head. Then the thing she feared happened but she knew it was going to happen. He realized what she had been saying all along, he kissed Lizzie back.
Gordo looked up at her with his mouth open. He hesitated for a minute "Miranda baby I'm sorry" he said crying. "I'm so sorry" he said. He walked up to her and attempted to hug her but she moved away.
"Don't apologize Gordo. I blame myself partly for this" she said.
He looked at her with confusion and hurt through his watery blue eyes.
"I blame myself Gordo because I fell in love with you fully knowing that you still had something for her. I fell in love with you knowing that your heart was still somewhat damaged from what she had done to you. I fell in love with you Gordo fully knowing that a sizable piece of your heart would always belong to her. And that much was cool with me because you love me Gordo. You showed me that by everything you did for me. I knew that this was just too good to be true, I knew the other shoe would have to drop sooner or later" she said crying.
"I just never expected for the shoe to drop like this, I never expected for you to fall for her again by a small kiss" she said.
"Miranda I haven't fallen for her. I don't want her, I want you. I need you in my life. I need you period!" He said seriously.
"Gordo we can't go on like this. I can't go on like this. I can't be in this relationship afraid that every time you are near her you will fall for her if she looks at you the wrong way. You have to figure out what you want. Is it me or her. Is it the brunette or the blonde. Is it the spontaneous one or the conservative. Gordo it's just best if we break up" she said turning her face away from his in tears.
"Miranda no" he said barely audible.
Both of them stood there for minutes just crying.
After what seemed like an eternity she moved in closer to him and held him. He put his arms around her waist and pushed her closer to him. He held her so tightly it hurt.
After awhile she moved away from him. She looked down at her wrist and noticed the bracelet he bought her. She starred at it and caressed it for a while. Then she did the unexpected, she took it off and handed it to him.
"Miranda I gave that to you. It's yours" he said softly.
"I know, but I'm giving it back. Gordo if we are meant to be then I will get it back from you" she said.
"Beautiful I know we are meant to be now. I don't want this, I don't want to break up, I want us to stay together and forget about Lizzie. I don't want the bracelet, I gave it to you and it is yours" he said pushing her hand back angrily.
"Gordo please don't make this harder. I don't want to let you go but I know you have to figure things out for your self. In my heart I know that this is right thing to do" she said. "Now please take this back" she said holding the bracelet out again. A single tear trickled down her face.
He hesitated for awhile then he grabbed the bracelet from her. He looked at her with pain and love at the same time. He was fully crying and he didn't care if it seemed unmanly.
"I will always love you Miranda Isabella Sanchez. That will never change and my feelings for you will never change but if this is what you want then so be it. I will do anything to make you happy" he said.
"This is not making me happy....but it is what I want" she said.
He leaned in and gave her one last kiss. He felt those soft lips he had come so accustomed to kissing. He smelled the sweet smell of fresh roses that he loved so much. He pulled away from her and caressed her face and he looked in her deep brown eyes. She felt him searching her soul for a change in her mind but it was obvious he couldn't find anything different....and that hurt him so deeply.
It hurt him to know that he hurt her so much. But what was done was done.
"Goodbye my beautiful" he said choking up.
"Goodbye my blue" she said crying.
He jumped of the porch and began to run. It was his turn to run away. He had to run away from the pain he just received. He ran and ran and ran but had no idea where he was going. The more he thought about them breaking up the harder he ran.
She watched him run with tears streaming down her face.
"I will always love you David Zepher Gordon" she said.
She slumped down on the porch and held her self while she cried.
**********
GORDO'S POV
It seemed like I ran for hours. I ran to our favorite spot on the hill in the park. When I got there I was totally exhausted.
I put my hand on my chest, I was breathing so hard it felt like I was going to hyperventilate. I dropped down on the hill and sat in our spot.
My heart felt so heavy. The thing I dreaded the most just happened and it's no way I can change that. She dumped me. She dumped me because I hurt her. The pain was so evident in her face.
She dumped me because I did something stupid.
"Why the hell did I kiss her back" I yelled for no one in particular to hear.
I sat there just looking at the wind dance through the trees and over the lake. It was so beautiful here. Everything here reminds me of her.
It was a nice day out even though Christmas was next week. That's one thing I always loved about California was the weather, the most you had to wear out hear during the winter months was a jacket.
That's the thing Miranda loved most about California too.
I just sat there still trying to catch my breath and calm down. My mind kept replaying the events that lead up to Miranda and my break up.
I just don't understand why she kissed me. She knew I was with Miranda. She knew how much I love her but she did it anyway and me being the stupid boy that I am kissed her back.
I think I knew all along that I kissed Lizzie, just like Miranda said. I just didn't want to believe it. I didn't want to admit that I did a really stupid thing. I know for a fact that the kiss meant nothing to me. I thought I was completely over her. In fact I know I'm completely over her! That still doesn't provide Miranda with much solace because she broke it off with me.
I sat in the park practically all day. I didn't decide to move or go any where until I realized how thirsty I was.
So I made the long walk back to civilization. The quickest and cheapest place I could go to get something to drink was the Digital Bean. So there I went.
The whole time I was walking there I kept thinking about how much I missed and needed Miranda back. I kept caressing the bracelet she told me to take back in my pocket. I held it so tight. I kept smelling the bracelet because it held her scent, which was like a breath of fresh air to me.
I finally reached my destination and walked in. Some of the kids from school were there like I suspected they would be. I heard a couple of people gossiping and laughing behind my back but I totally ignored them because I was in to much pain to care.
I reached the counter and ordered an ice cold Sprite and a bottle water I could take with me. The cashier gave me my order and I paid for it. I sat at the counter and drank my soda. Once I finished I got up to leave.
When I reached the door it swung open before I touched the handle.
In walked the person I hated so much at the moment. In walked the person that destroyed my happiness. In walked the person who hurt my precious Miranda so much that she screamed in pain.
In walked the person that I really despised at the moment. All I could do was look at her with coldness and anger in my eyes.
She kept diverting eye contact with me because she knew she was wrong. But I kept my eyes on her never moving them once.
She looked scared to say anything but she made herself do it.
"Ha...Hey Gordo, can we talk" said Lizzie nervously.
Hope ya like. Keep reading and reviewing.
Chapter 17
"What do you mean get this over with" said Gordo.
"You know what I mean Gordo; we have to talk about what happened yesterday. Even though this is not the ideal time to talk about something this serious at seven in the morning, and I really don't want to talk about it, but I guess we have to" said Miranda clearly angry and upset.
"Look Miranda, I'm sorry I am here so early but I didn't sleep a wink last night because my mind and my heart would not allow me too. Miranda what happened yesterday...I mean I had no idea that Lizzie was going to do that. We were making small talk about what happened between her and Jason and the next thing I know she is kissing me" said Gordo in a hurry.
"Miranda you have to understand that I never intended to hurt you, I would never do anything like this...ever. I love you too much and I value this relationship. I would do anything to take back what happened yesterday....but I can't, and I'm sorry for that" he said.
She stood there looking at him, motionless. For awhile she just starred into his eyes and then she broke her concentration and looked at the yard for awhile before responding.
"Gordo do you realize that my worst nightmare came true yesterday. I had to witness the man I love kissing another girl. Not just any girl but Lizzie. Lizzie of all people!" she said angrily.
"Miranda she kissed me, I didn't kiss her!" he partly yelled.
"Gordo you didn't see yourself, you kissed her back! And somehow I already think you are aware of this. Or else you would not have chased me home yesterday. Gordo you kissed her back....and that really hurt. That hurt more than her initiating anything" she said almost in tears.
"Miranda please don't cry, I can't stand to see you cry. I would have chased you home for any reason if I know you're upset. Miranda you have to believe me, I didn't kiss her back, Lizzie started the whole thing...she did Miranda. You have to believe me!" he said with the sound of hurt in his voice.
By now tears of pain and anger were coming down her face. Gordo went up to her to wipe them away. While wiping the tears away he caressed her face but she jerked it away.
"Gordo don't do that. I don't want you to touch me, I feel like I can't trust you anymore" she said still crying.
"What do you mean you can't trust me" he said.
He lifts her face with his hand so they are face to face. "You have to believe me beautiful" he said.
She looks at him in his deep blue eyes. Uncertainty written all over her face, she examines him. She kept looking into his eyes to search his soul. Never had Gordo ever lied to her about anything, so she had to believe him, she had to trust in him. But something deep inside could not allow that.
"Gordo you never lied to me about anything in our lives. And I don't think you would lie to me about something like this" she said.
"That's what I have been trying to tell you" he said with a hint of relief.
"I'm not finish. Gordo you never lied to me about anything because you were always sure that you knew the truth" she said.
"I don't understand" he said looking confused.
"Gordo you said that Lizzie initiated the kiss and I believe you about that part. Gordo I was there from the beginning. Jason and I turned the corner and saw you two talking before anything happened. Then I saw her lean in and kiss you....and I saw you lean into her and kiss her back" she said.
"That's not what happened Miranda!" yelled Gordo.
"Gordo I know what my eyes saw and they saw you kiss her back. That's why I screamed, my worst fear came true. Gordo you kissed her back, you have to stop lying to yourself. You owe yourself the truth, not only yourself but me" she said choking up. "Just think about it, recalculate everything in your head then look at me and honestly say that you didn't kiss her back and I will believe you" she said fully crying.
Gordo stood back and leaned on the porch, the past events clearly going back and forth in his head. Then the thing she feared happened but she knew it was going to happen. He realized what she had been saying all along, he kissed Lizzie back.
Gordo looked up at her with his mouth open. He hesitated for a minute "Miranda baby I'm sorry" he said crying. "I'm so sorry" he said. He walked up to her and attempted to hug her but she moved away.
"Don't apologize Gordo. I blame myself partly for this" she said.
He looked at her with confusion and hurt through his watery blue eyes.
"I blame myself Gordo because I fell in love with you fully knowing that you still had something for her. I fell in love with you knowing that your heart was still somewhat damaged from what she had done to you. I fell in love with you Gordo fully knowing that a sizable piece of your heart would always belong to her. And that much was cool with me because you love me Gordo. You showed me that by everything you did for me. I knew that this was just too good to be true, I knew the other shoe would have to drop sooner or later" she said crying.
"I just never expected for the shoe to drop like this, I never expected for you to fall for her again by a small kiss" she said.
"Miranda I haven't fallen for her. I don't want her, I want you. I need you in my life. I need you period!" He said seriously.
"Gordo we can't go on like this. I can't go on like this. I can't be in this relationship afraid that every time you are near her you will fall for her if she looks at you the wrong way. You have to figure out what you want. Is it me or her. Is it the brunette or the blonde. Is it the spontaneous one or the conservative. Gordo it's just best if we break up" she said turning her face away from his in tears.
"Miranda no" he said barely audible.
Both of them stood there for minutes just crying.
After what seemed like an eternity she moved in closer to him and held him. He put his arms around her waist and pushed her closer to him. He held her so tightly it hurt.
After awhile she moved away from him. She looked down at her wrist and noticed the bracelet he bought her. She starred at it and caressed it for a while. Then she did the unexpected, she took it off and handed it to him.
"Miranda I gave that to you. It's yours" he said softly.
"I know, but I'm giving it back. Gordo if we are meant to be then I will get it back from you" she said.
"Beautiful I know we are meant to be now. I don't want this, I don't want to break up, I want us to stay together and forget about Lizzie. I don't want the bracelet, I gave it to you and it is yours" he said pushing her hand back angrily.
"Gordo please don't make this harder. I don't want to let you go but I know you have to figure things out for your self. In my heart I know that this is right thing to do" she said. "Now please take this back" she said holding the bracelet out again. A single tear trickled down her face.
He hesitated for awhile then he grabbed the bracelet from her. He looked at her with pain and love at the same time. He was fully crying and he didn't care if it seemed unmanly.
"I will always love you Miranda Isabella Sanchez. That will never change and my feelings for you will never change but if this is what you want then so be it. I will do anything to make you happy" he said.
"This is not making me happy....but it is what I want" she said.
He leaned in and gave her one last kiss. He felt those soft lips he had come so accustomed to kissing. He smelled the sweet smell of fresh roses that he loved so much. He pulled away from her and caressed her face and he looked in her deep brown eyes. She felt him searching her soul for a change in her mind but it was obvious he couldn't find anything different....and that hurt him so deeply.
It hurt him to know that he hurt her so much. But what was done was done.
"Goodbye my beautiful" he said choking up.
"Goodbye my blue" she said crying.
He jumped of the porch and began to run. It was his turn to run away. He had to run away from the pain he just received. He ran and ran and ran but had no idea where he was going. The more he thought about them breaking up the harder he ran.
She watched him run with tears streaming down her face.
"I will always love you David Zepher Gordon" she said.
She slumped down on the porch and held her self while she cried.
**********
GORDO'S POV
It seemed like I ran for hours. I ran to our favorite spot on the hill in the park. When I got there I was totally exhausted.
I put my hand on my chest, I was breathing so hard it felt like I was going to hyperventilate. I dropped down on the hill and sat in our spot.
My heart felt so heavy. The thing I dreaded the most just happened and it's no way I can change that. She dumped me. She dumped me because I hurt her. The pain was so evident in her face.
She dumped me because I did something stupid.
"Why the hell did I kiss her back" I yelled for no one in particular to hear.
I sat there just looking at the wind dance through the trees and over the lake. It was so beautiful here. Everything here reminds me of her.
It was a nice day out even though Christmas was next week. That's one thing I always loved about California was the weather, the most you had to wear out hear during the winter months was a jacket.
That's the thing Miranda loved most about California too.
I just sat there still trying to catch my breath and calm down. My mind kept replaying the events that lead up to Miranda and my break up.
I just don't understand why she kissed me. She knew I was with Miranda. She knew how much I love her but she did it anyway and me being the stupid boy that I am kissed her back.
I think I knew all along that I kissed Lizzie, just like Miranda said. I just didn't want to believe it. I didn't want to admit that I did a really stupid thing. I know for a fact that the kiss meant nothing to me. I thought I was completely over her. In fact I know I'm completely over her! That still doesn't provide Miranda with much solace because she broke it off with me.
I sat in the park practically all day. I didn't decide to move or go any where until I realized how thirsty I was.
So I made the long walk back to civilization. The quickest and cheapest place I could go to get something to drink was the Digital Bean. So there I went.
The whole time I was walking there I kept thinking about how much I missed and needed Miranda back. I kept caressing the bracelet she told me to take back in my pocket. I held it so tight. I kept smelling the bracelet because it held her scent, which was like a breath of fresh air to me.
I finally reached my destination and walked in. Some of the kids from school were there like I suspected they would be. I heard a couple of people gossiping and laughing behind my back but I totally ignored them because I was in to much pain to care.
I reached the counter and ordered an ice cold Sprite and a bottle water I could take with me. The cashier gave me my order and I paid for it. I sat at the counter and drank my soda. Once I finished I got up to leave.
When I reached the door it swung open before I touched the handle.
In walked the person I hated so much at the moment. In walked the person that destroyed my happiness. In walked the person who hurt my precious Miranda so much that she screamed in pain.
In walked the person that I really despised at the moment. All I could do was look at her with coldness and anger in my eyes.
She kept diverting eye contact with me because she knew she was wrong. But I kept my eyes on her never moving them once.
She looked scared to say anything but she made herself do it.
"Ha...Hey Gordo, can we talk" said Lizzie nervously.
Hope ya like. Keep reading and reviewing.