Disclaimer: I don't own a thing. Except for Anna. Who's not in this chapter.
Chapter Twenty-Six: The Talk
Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.
-Swami X
"Harry!" Sirius exclaimed, striding into Harry's gloomy room two days later. "How are you?"
"Good, Sirius," he said curiously. "What's wrong?"
"Wrong?" Sirius said brightly. "Why would you think something's wrong? Nothing's wrong! What's wrong with me wanting to talk to my godson?"
"Then why are you acting so bizarre?"
Sirius blanched. He sat down opposite Harry on Ron's bed. He nervously gazed around the room, looking anywhere but Harry.
"Sirius?" the bespectacled boy asked. "Sirius, what's wrong."
Sirius heaved a sigh. "Well, um... well, let's see..."
Harry sniggered. "Really, Sirius, just come out and say it."
He smiled nervously. "Well, Harry. Harry, Harry, Harry. You're fifteen now, and I thought perhaps it was time for us to... you know... have a talk..."
Harry grinned. "A talk?" he said innocently. "What kind of talk would that be?"
Sirius growled. "You know..." he said sourly. "A 'talk.'"
"No, Sirius, I really don't know."
"Well, you know, you're at a time in your life when you'll start to... you know... notice things..."
"Sirius, are you trying to talk about puberty to me?"
Sirius choked.
"Because if you are," Harry continued, "There really isn't much point. Dudley delighted in telling me all about puberty and sex," he emphasised, enjoying Sirius' discomfort, "last summer. Seems that Dudley had some, er, experience with girls and though the would enlighten me, rather vulgarly at that. Besides, we had all those sex education classes at the end of primary school."
"Oh," Sirius mumbled. "Well, why didn't you tell me that?"
"Because I really enjoyed seeing you squirm like that."
"Horrible child," Sirius said, throwing a pillow at Harry, which he deftly caught with his Seeker skills.
"But while we're on the subject, Sirius," Harry said, a mischievous twinkle in his eye, "What's happening between you and Anna?"
Sirius gaped at Harry. "What? How-" he spluttered.
"Sirius, honestly, how old do you think I am? Five?"
"Well, no, but-"
Harry held up his hands. "I had my suspicions and Hermione confirmed them for me yesterday. She seems to think you two are in love."
Sirius nodded mutely.
Harry continued. "That's what I thought. And that's fine with me, seriously." He smirked. "No pun intended. Besides, Hermione told me that she'd personally castrate me if I interfered. I don't know why she thinks I would, but there you go, proof that Hermione really can be terrifying when she wants to be."
Sirius doubled over in laughter. "She said that? That she'd castrate you?"
Harry chuckled. "Yeah, she did. And that she wouldn't use her wand. You should've seen Ron's face..."
Once he'd sobered up, Sirius studied Harry shrewdly. "So you're sure you're okay with this?"
"Of course I am. You deserve a little happiness."
Sirius smiled. "As corny as it sounds, I'd be just as happy being just your godfather." He grinned. "So, tell me, any girls on the horizon?"
Harry smiled secretively. "Well, there is this one girl..."
A/N: Aahhh. There you go. I really should be doing my English essay right about now, but I really, really, don't want to. This is just so much more fun. Review!