Disclaimer: I don't own anything that you recognise.
A/N: Go and put on a sad song...
Chapter Forty-Four: Gone
"A feeling of sadness and longing
That is not akin to pain,
And resembles sorrow only
As the mist resembles the rain."
-- Longfellow.
Sirius burst into the room where Anna was lying, urgency written all over his face.
"Sirius, what's wrong?" she asked immediately.
"Harry – we've got to go – Voldemort, he's lured Harry to the Ministry – quick, we have to go now!"
Anna jumped from the bed. "Sirius! Slow down! What's happened?"
Suddenly, Severus appeared beside the door. He grabbed Anna and dragged her from the room, Sirius following in their wake. "Lord Voldemort has made Potter believe that Sirius is being tortured. Potter and his friends are at the Ministry now. We have to leave," he explained rapidly as they ran into the kitchen where Moody, Tonks, Remus and Kingsley were already waiting. "I need to contact Albus, you need to get to the Ministry."
...&&&...
Anna was in the Brain Chamber with Ron, Hermione, Ginny and Luna when Harry's first screams tore through the air.
"SIRIUS! SIRIUS!"
Anna froze, her breath catching in her throat, her heart giving an almighty wrench. . "No..." she whispered dully, "No..."
"SIRIUS! SIRIUS!"
Quickly turning around, Anna sprinted towards the Death Chamber, blindly running down the long hall.
"HE-IS-NOT-DEAD!"
She paused, a strangled cry escaping her throat as she doubled over. "No!" Anna wailed, sinking to the floor. "No..."
"SHE KILLED SIRIUS! I'LL KILL HER!"
Another anguished cry ripped through Anna's throat as the impact of Harry's words hit her. She clutched at her chest, at the searing pain that tore through her heart with the knowledge that Harry's words bestowed upon her. She cried out in pain, the tears now streaming freely down her face.
Hearing footsteps before her, she looked up to see Remus walking down the hallway. She gazed searchingly at him, the unasked question written plainly on her face. He shook his head slightly, his ashen face betraying him. Blinking back tears, Anna allowed Remus to lift her to her feet and she clung desperately to his robes as she sought to control her grief.
"Come on," he said throatily, as if every word was causing him pain. "We have to help the others."
She nodded weakly. "I managed to get the brain of Ron and staunch some of the blood but I couldn't wake up the other three. They were hit with some curse, I don't know..."
They reached the Brain Chamber and Anna quickly conjured stretchers for the girls while Remus dealt with Ron, silent, sorrowful tears trickling quietly down her porcelain cheeks.
...&&&...
Hours later, once the students had been taken back to Hogwarts and Tonks to St Mungo's, Anna found herself lying on her bed, gazing blankly at the ceiling.
Her heart ached, which made her angry because logically she knew that the pain was coming from her head. It made no sense, but she could not ignore the dull pain that coursed through her. It felt as if someone had taken a part away from her; the part that loved, that laughed, that lived. How was she to keep breathing with Sirius gone? She felt so lost and alone, but then she felt guilty, imagining how Remus and Harry must've been feeling; the last Marauder and the only thing close to a parent gone.
It was not as if she blamed herself, as she knew Harry woul be doing. But she couldn't help thinking that maybe if she hadn't of stopped to help Harry's friends, if she had've kept going with the others, somehow things might've been different. She tried to imagine a life without Sirius; tried to imagine getting up, eating, showering, shopping; doing all those normal things people do, but she couldn't. Couldn't imagine doing anything without Sirius's warmth beside her. She felt utterly hopeless.
He's gone, Anna, she told herself inwardly. He's gone and there is nothing you can do about it, so get used to it. She wept silently, wrapping her arms around herself, letting the tears fall against the soft pillow underneath her, repeating a silent mantra to herself; he's gone, he's gone, he's gone, he's gone...
A/N: OR IS HE!?!?!?! Mwahahahahahha!!! Oh and by the way, just in case you were wondering, the sad song, or songs, I chose to write this chapter were "For Martha" by the Smashing Pumpkins, "I Grieve" by Peter Gabriel and "American Beauty," by Thomas Newman. Read on!!!