A/N: Aiyee! I'm so happy that this chapter is done already. I hope it will be very pleasurable to all that will be reading this. And tell me what you think. I hope it's getting interesting. I don't think I can keep up with this being an angst fic, I don't know, it's starting to not be. Apparently, it was just sad in the first chapter. But still, I will try my very best to make this as angsty as I could, to please those angst-lovers out there. Also, I had Hermione's point of view later on in this chapter, for a change. So that we know what Hermione is also feeling. I would like to thank those that reviewed. It was great to have a good response toward this story. And I can see that my other fic (What's Held Within, in case you didn't know) is gathering good responses as well.

When You Face Death

By prowess

When you face death, what is it you see?

A bright light?

A slideshow of your life?

Or is it the one thing that makes you happy?

I saw you Hermione.

I smiled, a faint smile, a hurtful smile, and quietly said,

"No."

Her eyes flung open, as tears were freed quickly, and I couldn't help but cry myself.

"No! Harry!"

And it was going so well.

She closed her eyes again, covering her chocolate eyes from view. I remembered then and there the first time I opened my eyes, to find myself a spirit. It reminded me of that. I was in a bit of disbelief, and I tried so many things I knew I could never do, like hold her, or wipe away her tears.

She closed her eyes again, trying to concentrate. She was trying to have me back. But it just didn't work.

We were back to reality. That I was dead, and she living.

"Harry answer me!" she screamed. "Harry!"

She leaned on the wall for support, from the screaming and crying she became exhausted, and knowing she cannot do anything, she slid down and wept. I slowly came by her and curled beside her, trying to encircle my arms to the curve of her body, and together…

We wept…

I opened my eyes as I felt the pain from crying the previous day. My eyes were swollen and I decided to not go anywhere yet, not to work, or go shopping, or do any other thing that I used to. I knew Harry was here at home, and I just couldn't leave, I can't. I can't think of doing anything better than to sit idly and wait, wait for Harry to come back. He didn't do anything afterwards. When I flung my eyes open, I only saw air, no emerald eyes to look at, or dark hair to witness. I didn't even see a gleam, a ray of light, or a ghost. I felt so alone, like I was strapped off of everything I had.

Because Harry was everything I had.

I couldn't help but wonder what he could be doing right now. Was he looking at me? Crying like I was? Was he holding me?  I stared at blank space, my eyes feeling so heavy. Are emerald eyes looking at mine? I can't say. I only see air.

When he said no, I immediately felt the end of his presence. When he said no, I remember trying to hold on to him. His departure was like a piece of interlaced silk brushing my body during a soft breeze. After that I felt nothing except loneliness. Pure loneliness…

A lot of people say I have to move one, it will do me good. I shouldn't wallow in my loneliness and get on with my life. I'm older, I should know better. But he came today and I felt him and heard him. He came, and he promised he will come back. I have to wait.

Why let go if you can still hold on to it? If you can hold on to it, you just have to give it a tight pull and it will be right back in your arms. I have to move on, otherwise his efforts of coming back to me would be in vain.

I have to pull myself together. I have to end my loneliness. Whatever it is I have to do, sorcery, spells, I have to bring him back using everything I have.

For the first time today, I feel contented. I shouldn't just sit around idly. If Harry doesn't have enough strength to come back to me, I'll help him. I found the strength to stand up and take the longest bath I probably ever had. I dressed into my most comfortable clothes. I take note of all the things I need. I felt like buying groceries, and when I get home, I would cook the best meal I have eaten in days. I just felt so light and optimistic. I felt my lips curving into a small smile, a smile of hope, a smile that I would see as I stare in Harry's eyes once again. As I leave my home, I turned around at looked at space. Somewhere around there sits Harry. I just know it. I smiled before closing the door.

Ever since Harry died, I couldn't help but wonder why it was supposed to end this way. I haven't fully accepted his death, he still should be the boy who lived. I remember my initial reaction when his eyes failed to open, revealing his bright green orbs. I remember just staring at his eyelids, patiently waiting for it to flutter open. I refused to believe that it would never open again. And I cried, because his stupid eyes were going to be closed for eternity. Damn eyes. I didn't even get to stare at it one last time. Damn Harry. I didn't even get to say I love you one last time.

I hate remembering the past. I hate remembering pain or sorrow. But Harry was my everything : past, present, future…pain, love, suffering, joy… It's not the pain or past I remember. It is Harry that I have, and if for this very reason I have to stand still as I watch everybody getting on with their lives saying they moved on, I would sit and hold on to the very last piece of thread that binds me to him. I will wrap my finger on what binds his new world and mine.

After his death, you can really see who really his friends were. I curse those hypocrites who dare come to his funeral, talking about his bravery but at the truth of it all, never really had faith in him. I swear, if I hadn't had enough sanity in my system I would have killed them whatever rank or position they have. They never really cared for him, at least not like any of us did. Some were only there during his ultimate highs, and not a hair in sight during his ultimate lows. Some only used him for his popularity, for his reputation. Otherwise, Harry wouldn't even be looked upon by those mongrels. And yet, Harry didn't care. They were lost souls, he said. He still had enough respect for them, not thinking of doing anything to harm them. Still, others, can never cease talking crap out of him, telling all these exaggerated stories about Harry's mishaps, creating rumors that I knew bothered Harry. Still, he tried to be a good person, someone who can stand up proud, despite these kind of people. I don't know if they were angry or jealous of him, but he doesn't deserve to be hated just because of his fate, that is to be the Boy Who Lived. Although there were also those who loved him truly, and those who loved him though showed it discreetly. Harry always told me I was too concerned. I'd always reply, it's because I can see who really liked him as he was, and these people don't like him for who he really was. Simple, quiet, caring Harry. And he'd tell me, I was the only one who liked him as he was, accepting him without leaving anything to hate. Then I would pinch him in the cheek and he would pat me on the head. I knew I shouldn't be full of angst and be very emotional. These kinds of things were never really my thing. I never felt sad when I was with Harry. Disappointed, maybe, but never sorrowful. At least, not until he left…

But now, he's going to come back, and I'd help him come back or I'll die trying. I brush wells of tears forming around my eyes as I continue with what I've set out for. I turned into this corner to get to the grocery store faster. I had to pass through a dark passageway, where poor people normally stayed. A lot of them offered telling other people's fortune, but I didn't mind them. It's not like I don't know how to do it. I'm from Hogwarts for crying out loud. I can do better than dwindle other people's money for my personal preferences. But today, there seemed to be one person too many. I noticed a group of people running towards one corner of the passageway. A small crowd was gathering around this certain person whom I can truly recognize.

Not only because of the voice….

But also because of what she's saying….

Here comes one of those hypocrites now.

A/N: Decided to cut it short. This is not exactly what I would call one of the best I've written, but I just had to whip something up to continue the story. Later on, things will be better. I hope that I have less grammatical errors now… I did hurry this up. Let me just tell you that school is like a fast food restaurant. Everything's in a hurry and you never get to stop because orders are always coming. So far, we have kilotons of homework and heavy projects every so often, not to mention the numerous exams per day. Final exams are near and I wanted to post a chapter to show that it's still progressing. To all those who waited for an update I am truly sorry like I usually am because of neglecting this. It's just that I really can't find the time wherein I can just sit back and think of the proper words to use to show the flow of the story. I'm used to writing chapters in one sitting and that takes a lot of hours, and if I cut it and continue it, it becomes different. That's why I have to read my chaps from chapter 1 again, cause I sometimes forget the flow. However, I wasn't able to take note of the stuff I wrote before so there might be things here that are not proportional to the previous chapters. Just tell me if you find any. Aside from the lack of time, (as if that wasn't enough a barrier) my grades aren't that high anymore, and if I show any enthusiasm in finishing my fics, my parents might use it against me. So, yeah,  I'm kind of outwitting them by avoiding to let this be one of the bribes they use to make me concentrate on studies.

With regards to the grammatical errors and incorrect usage of words in the previous chapters, bear with me, I don't have the time to change them either. Perhaps in a few week's time when it's our break I can attend to it. Thank you for reminding me and if you see any more just tell me.

Also with the changing of the title, yeah, I was thinking of it too. But I'll write chapters first…. J

I hope this doesn't look too hurried, otherwise I'll scrape it off and rewrite. The topic is pretty much boring, I know, but eventually it will be a whole lot more interesting. Just wait. So there, till the next chapter. I hope people who waited for this still get to see it. Thanks!

I tried to push my way in to see if the person who I'm thinking is really there. The words said were too much to bear and if I confirm the identity, I might not control myself.

"There was once a boy, named Harry Potter, and he was called the Boy Who lived. A pretty nice boy he was, very obedient, too bad that he had to die soon. I knew it would happen. Even he couldn't escape the clutches of the Dark Lord. There was no doubt in my mind that he wouldn't escape that hell. How horrible it must felt. Well, he's dead now. Although what I have told you is not even half as much interesting as this…"

I finally made my way in front and say myself staring wide eyed, not only at the person, but now at what is in the table.

When you faced death, what did you see?

A bright light?

A slideshow of your life?

Or the one thing that made you happy?

Will I see you again Harry?