Aeryn had been sitting alone on one of the lower tiers of Moya for what seemed like arns. She was thankful Rygel had decided to get his eema off the ship and go looking for Noranti and Stark, without making things worse, and that D'argo was attending John to give her a break. She sat with her back pressed to the wall and her head in her arms sobbing deeply. No one ever realised she cried except Crichton, Pilot and Moya. If she needed to cry she'd go down to the lowest tier as far away from the crew as possible so she could be alone. Velorek's request hadn't quite sunk in; sleep with him for the antidote. Her deep sobs soon subsided and turned into anger, and she kicked some debris which was sent flying down the corridor. "FRELL YOU VELOREK!" she yelled. "FRELL YOU!" She found an old Peacekeeper punch bag in some empty captain's quarters and decided it was the perfect target for her growing anger. She kicked and punched it repeatedly, over and over again relieving all the tension and stress building inside, but even though her knuckles started to bleed it didn't do much. Once again, Velorek had caused her to punch a punch bag until her hands bled. She let out an anguished cry and kicked the worn out bag so hard it split sending fluff flying everywhere.
"Feel better?"
Aeryn spun round, "Frell off Chiana," she spat. She wasn't in the mood for company. Right now she'd much rather be left alone to scream, shout, kick and punch everything in sight. It wouldn't cure John or turn back the clock but it'd sure as hezmena make her feel better.
"Whatever. I just figured you needed to talk, and seeing as Crichton is ill..."
"Sorry. I'm just feeling stressed... and no it's not my hormones." She replied bitterly.
"Well something's wrong... I haven't seen you that angry in a long time... uh... you've made a mess of your hands, you should clean them before they scar..." Chiana stuttered, trying at least to make some form of conversation with the angry Sebacean.
Aeryn sunk to the floor and buried her head in her arms once again. "I don't know how much more I can take... Velorek..."
Chiana smiled sympathetically and sat next to her, "He made John sick right?"
Aeryn nodded, "He has the antidote, and unless..."
"Unless what?" Chiana persisted.
"Unless I sleep with him..."
"What?" the Nebari girl exclaimed, "Are you fekkik? John will never forgive you..."
Aeryn's eyes watered. Taking a gulp of air she sighed deeply and sadly. "I have to Chiana... I can't just sit back and watch John die in my arms again..." she exclaimed. Tears welled up in her eyes, "I have to do this... I know that it will probably end our relationship, but I love him Chiana, I love him and I would do anything... absolutely anything to save his life. I would die for him... I have died for him, and if sleeping with Velorek is the only way I'll get the antidote I will do it... I will do it because I love John more than I have loved anyone in my life." A single tear rolled down her cheek, "...and then Velorek will have what he has wanted since he got here and my relationship with John will be over... and I will have lost a friend as well as a lover."
"Isn't there any other way? What if I slept with him? He's pretty cute, even if he is a psycho..."
Aeryn laughed sarcastically, "You Chiana? To him you are a lesser specie... if he was still a Peacekeeper he'd frell you for the sake of it; you'd be a trophy frell... a Nebari tralk," she said, emphasising the last word, "But right now if you offered yourself he'd take pleasure in killing you."
Chiana's eyes widened, "Really? He'd do that?"
"Yes... he would," she replied coldly. "If you want to do something for me Chiana, keep D'argo busy and look after John for the next couple of arns. I have to get the antidote. And promise me one thing... when John wakes up, please don't tell him what I did to get it..."
"Yeah Aeryn... I promise."
Aeryn wandered slowly towards Velorek's quarters. The thought of Velorek touching her made her skin crawl and now she had to recreate with this creep. She dried her eyes outside his quarters before pressing the door release to let herself in. "You know why I'm here..." she said solemnly.
The corners of Velorek's mouth turned into a sly smile, "Ah yes. You want the antidote, am I correct?" he asked. Slowly he approached Aeryn and reached over her to pull the privacy curtain closed.
"Just give me the antidote and we can get on with this..." she replied, trying to keep any emotions buried deeply inside.
"Not until you sleep with me. That was the deal... you sleep with me I give you the antidote, not the other way around."
Aeryn shut her eyes tightly, trying to pull the image of John into her head, "Just get on with it," she mumbled.
Velorek stroked her soft cheek, "You won't get the antidote talking to me like that. I want you to make love to me as if you were making love to him."
Aeryn's eyes shot wide open, "No..." she whispered.
"Fine." Velorek said turning away, "Then you shall get no antidote and your mate John Crichton will die."
"Okay..." she said weakly. "Okay..."
Velorek's smile returned. "Come here..." he said pulling her towards the bed, "I'm not going to hurt you..." He slowly stripped of Aeryn's vest and gently caressed her breasts, causing her to shudder with repulsion. The nausea began building rapidly with every kiss and nibble he took, and she fought to keep it down. "Now this isn't too bad, is it Aeryn?" he asked softly, but she didn't answer. He took her hands in his and sucked each finger one by one causing the earlier wounds to sting, before sliding her hand down his pants. "That's what you do to me Aeryn... you always have." He sat on the bed and pulled her onto him and forced hard kisses on her mouth that nearly made her throw up. Soon he was lying on top of Aeryn, totally naked against her semi-clothed body. Slowly he slid down her body and brushed his hands over her hips, sliding her pants and underwear off in the process. "I've been waiting for this for a long time... perhaps this will help you loosen up..." he said, injecting her with a drug of some kind.
Aeryn winced as the liquid coursed through her veins. She could feel herself loosing all control of the situation, Velorek could do what the hezmena he wanted and she could do nothing about it. She shut her eyes as tightly as she could and tried to black everything out, but she could feel him touching her in all the places John touched her, kissing her in all the places John touched her and every movement he made inside her."Kiss me Aeryn," Velorek gasped, before covering her mouth violently with his.
She could feel his tongue almost choking her. He didn't kiss her the way John did. John was sensitive and loving. John made sure he didn't suffocate her with his tongue and he made sure she was comfortable with the pace of things. Velorek was not the man she remembered. She wondered what had happened to the gentle lover she knew all those cycles back. She didn't need to open her eyes to know what Velorek was doing to her, she could see it clearly in her head and feel him all over her body. She could feel him biting her ear hard, biting her neck and breasts, and licking her stomach. She was actually glad when she felt him climax inside her.
Velorek rolled off and stroked her tearstained cheek. "I can't say you made love to me like you make love to John, but you kept your side of the bargain, and I will keep mine. I am not the cruel man you think I have become," he said handing over a small silver bottle. "Oh and by the way, I moved your pulse pistol the other night... I wanted you to know I'd been watching you."
Aeryn snatched it out of his hand without a word, and dressed quickly. As she stepped out of his quarters she threw up before locking him in. She felt sick, dirty and degraded. All she wanted was for her mate to hold her, but she knew he probably never would again. As she walked towards the quarters where her sick lover lay, she wondered what she'd do when Crichton found out. Walking into her quarters, she saw D'argo sitting on the bed beside him, and Chiana in the corner watching. "I have the antidote," she said weakly."What did you do to get him to give you this?" D'argo asked.
Aeryn shook her head, "Just a little bargaining," she replied. "Would you give this to him? I have to do something."
"Of course Aeryn. At least John will be back to his old self and you can get on with wedding preparations."
Aeryn smiled faintly and rushed down the corridors to the bathing area. As she stripped off and stepped into the warm flowing water of the shower she let out an anguished cry and punched the cubical wall hard causing a sickening crunch to be heard and her earlier wounds to reopen. The pain felt good and with it she momentarily forgot about Velorek. But now she would never be rid of Velorek after he had defiled her in such a way. All of her resilience, and fight had now left her body and she was an emotional mess that she wanted nobody to see. She grabbed some soap and a sponge and scrubbed at her body hard, no matter how hard she scrubbed she couldn't get rid of the dirty feeling on her body Velorek had made her feel. Tears mingled with the shower water that flowed over her body and she felt weak and tired. Half of her wanted to get off Moya before John found out the truth and went looking for her in a rage. The other half wanted to confess all to John; for him to shoot her for betraying him just so she could get the images of Velorek from her head. Velorek was probably happily sleeping off a frell right now, please with himself for momentarily getting his ex-lover back.
John's eyes flickered open to see two blurry figures standing in front of him. "Aeryn?" he asked, "Baby... is that you? Did you get the antidote?" All he wanted now he was awake was to hold Aeryn in his arms. To kiss and embrace her, to reassure her everything was alright. But something seemed very wrong, and he couldn't quite tell what.
"No old man! It's D'argo and Chi." Chiana smiled.
"Hey Pip, Hey D! Where's Aeryn?" he asked as his vision became clear, "Is she okay? Did that son of a bitch hurt her?"
"She is fine my friend, but I must go. It has been a long few days and I need to rest and revitalise." D'argo replied, unknowing as to the sacrifice Aeryn had made for her mate.
"Thanks D," John replied. He noticed Chiana seemed unusually quiet. "Hey Chi... what's wrong? Has something happened to Aeryn that you ain't telling us?"
"Uh... no... Why should there be? I haven't seen her, I swear to you Crichton..." she stammered. She'd promised Aeryn she wouldn't say anything to Crichton, and with Aeryn's mood swings the way they were at the moment she was reluctant to tell the truth. Aeryn would probably shoot her dead if she found out. "Ask Aeryn..." she replied.
John's eyes watered, fearing the worst, "Please... tell me. Has Aeryn lost the baby? Has that bastard hurt her in any way? Please Chiana... tell me."
"But Aeryn will kill me..." she blurted out.
He began to get agitated. He just wanted to know if Aeryn was alright, but it seemed everyone was keeping something from him which frustrated him no end. "No she won't."
"Well..." Chiana hesitated for a minute before blurting it out, "Aeryn wanted to tell you herself and she made me promise not to tell you. Velorek poisoned you and wanted things in return for your cure but..."
"Whoa Pip... slow down," he said, gently sitting her down on the bed. "Now start again from the beginning... what did Aeryn want you to do?"
"When Velorek stabbed you, in return for the antidote, he wanted bigger quarters, food and freedom to roam the ship... but that wasn't enough. He wanted Aeryn to sleep with him, but Aeryn said no at first but then changed her mind..." she looked at John, whose eyes filled with tears. "She did it for you... because she loves you. She told me not to tell you... she wanted to tell you herself but was afraid... I reckon he really hurt her..."
John felt his heart snap. He hadn't heard the words after 'she said no at first but then changed her mind.' His lover.... his fiancé had betrayed him. He wondered how he could ever trust Aeryn again. "She shouldn't have done it... she should have just let me die... where is she?" he asked bitterly.
"I dunno Crichton... try the lower tiers."
Aeryn sat in a shadowy part of the lowest tier possible, hoping nobody would find her the way she was looking and feeling now. She shivered slightly as she lay on a damp bed. She felt dead inside. The tears and the anger had dried up and there was seemingly nothing left to feel. The remaining physical and mental strength had vanished and all she really wanted was a few words and a kiss of reassurance from Crichton, but she realised she was unlikely to feel that ever again. She felt like there was nothing left of the former strong person she once was, just a frail and emotionless shell. 'John will never ever forgive me for this' she thought to herself. 'And my child... how will she be able to look at me when her father tells her what a tralk her mother is,' Aeryn sighed deeply, and pulling her pulse pistol from its holster aimed it at her head. As she was about to squeeze the trigger, pulse fire knocked it out of her hand.
"Aeryn... you and I need to talk," a voice said sternly.
To Be Continued...