I woke up before he did and went to the top of the mountain, wishing everyone else was there. Well, except for X-ray. Maybe then, we could... I don't know. Be there together at the very least. I sighed as I watched the sunrise, a song coming to mind.
"My gift is my song... and this one's for you.
And you can tell everybody that this is your song
It may be quite simple, but now that it's done
Hope you don't mind, I hope you don't mind
That I put down in words, how wonderful life is
Now you're in the world...
I sat on the roof and kicked off the moss
Well some of these verses well they, they got me quite cross
But the sun's been quite kind while I wrote this song
It's for people like you that I keep it turned on
So excuse me for forgetting, but these things I do
You see, I've forgotten if they're green or they're blue
Anyway the thing is – what I really mean
Yours are the sweetest eyes I've ever seen
And you can tell everybody that this is your song
It may be quite simple but now that it's done
Hope you don't mind, I hope you don't mind
That I put down in words...
How wonderful life is, now you're in the world
I hope you don't mind
I hope you don't mind
That I put down in words...
How wonderful life is...
Now you're in the world..."(AN: That's the BEST song from Moulin Rouge!!) I sang, smiling when I saw his shadow over me. When he sat next to me, he just looked at me. Staring, almost. "yeah?"
"If you hadn't been singing, I woulda thought you'd left." I cocked my head to one side, confused. "Astrid, I'm so in love with you..." he trailed off quietly. I liked him like this. When no one else was around, the walls of protection came crashing down, trusting me not to hurt him. It was the same with me, but it was a more obvious change with him. "I just keep having this... this... nightmare where I wake up and I can't find you... it creeps me out."
I ran my fingers through his hair. "That won't happen. Ever." He sighed and leaned into me, obviously still tired but not wanting to sleep. "I don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall asleep, 'cause I'd miss you baby, and I don't wanna miss a thing...." I whispered in his ear.
"What is it with you and singin' today?" He laughed.
I shrugged. "I felt like it."
He just smiled. "Whatever. You know, I'm real glad you came with me. It'd be lonely up here... alone. And we both know how well I do alone. If you weren't here, I'd be a wreck by now."
I laughed. "Now you wouldn't. You'd be fine and you know it. You're a tough guy..."
He cracked up. "You know how I was around the guys? That was an act. This, me right now? This is more real than I've ever been." I raised my eyebrows. "You've broken down every wall I ever built around myself."
"Oh?" I asked.
He shook his head. "I can't explain it. It just happened. I don't know how, but I know why." I waited while he looked away for a minute, then looked back at me. "you just did. You showed actual love towards me. I don't ever remember that, except with Candy, and even with her, it wasn't real."
I slowly shook my head. "yeah, but-"He cut me off, pressing his lips to mine, kissing me with so much... raw emotion. I kissed back, returning the feeling. All we wanted right then was to kiss, but suddenly his hands were under my shirt, touching my bare skin. I froze. "Stop."
He moved away. "I'm... I'm so sorry. I... I..." his hands shook. "Please, I..." he stood and slowly walked down to the onion patch.
I sat there for a while, then looked down and saw him staring at a piece of broken glass in his hands. "Alan!" I scrambled down the thumb as he stared at the glass. When I reached him, I started kissing him with all I had. He dropped the glass and closed his eyes while I kissed his face and neck, shivering almost when I kissed his collarbone. "I love you so much."
"Even after..."
"Yes." I kept kissing him.
"That feels good...." He mumbled, starting to kiss back. Now I shivered when he kissed my neck. I have never fallen in love so fast before... correction. I'd never fallen in love. It was scary and crazy, but it felt right. Especially with him. He knew me inside and out without either of us saying a word, and I loved that. I'm a hopeless romantic at heart, I admit it.
When we pulled apart, I just kept my head rested on his chest, wanting to hear his heart beating. That's how I fell asleep and woke up. It couldn't have been more than an hour's nap because the sun was still high in the sky. I was laying with my head on his chest and he was sweating and mumbling incoherently. "Alan?" I whispered.
He shot up, gasping. "NO!!" Just like I used to do when I was still at home and terrified of being killed in my sleep. His eyes darted around wildly and then he sighed with relief. He shook his head and swallowed against a dry throat, clearing his head. "What's with these dreams?" he asked, more to himself than to me.
"Do you want to tell me about them? Maybe it'd help if someone knew."
He ran his hands through his hair and looked down. "Okay. It starts out that I'm with you, in my house, when ma comes in, drunk off her ass, and starts ranting and raving about you being over all the time, then stars hitting me... and you because you're trying to get her off of me. Every time, you fight like you've got 50 arms, but every time, you wind up in the hospital no matter how hard I try to derail her." His voice was barely above a whisper when he told me this, but I heard every word.
I brushed hair from his forehead. "It's only a dream. I'll be fine, you'll be fine. It's just you worrying too much. Calm down. It's not as if she's here right now." I sighed. "Man, we get all the bad dreams. We gotta save some for everyone else."
"You get them to?" he asked. I nodded. "Why don't you tell me?"
"You're already having nightmares. I don't want you worrying about me."
He shook his head, smiling. "Naw, see, that's what I'm here for. You're always worrying about me. It's my turn, belle."
I smiled back. "Okay, well, they start out with..."
(cackles Cliffhanger! Don't you just LOVE those? Well, sorry this took so freaking long, but I had major writes block, plus my ex was being an ass.)