A/N sorry about the spacing, my computer hates me. Well so does everyone
else in this world so what else is new?
Disclaimer :I don't own anything. Well except Strider. Sort of. Well I own
his personality, not his name. Or maybe I do own him. I'm confused.
A/N sorry about the spacing, my computer hates me. Well so does everyone else in this world so what else is new?
A/N For all those who hated the Sam/Frodo thing, its NOT slash. That's fixed in this chapter.
Chapter Two
Strider sat down next to a tree, finger puppets in hand. Making sure he was alone, he slipped them on his two pointer fingers. He cleared his throat,
"Now starting the number one finger puppet show of all time, Strider vs. Aragorn!" he said in his announcer voice.
"Now presenting..Strider! Yeah! Go Strider! You rule!" he cheered, mimicking a crowd of people. "And now, Aragorn! Boooooooooo! We Hate Aragorn! Someone call the zoo, we found their lost monkey! Boooooooooo!" Strider smiled to himself. "See," he said in an unnaturally squeaky voice and moving his right pointer finger at the same time. "The crowd loves me already!" "Whaaaaa!" he cried, moving his left pointer finger this time. (Just so you know, Strider is pretending that his right pointer finger is himself and Aragorn is his left pointer finger. The fingers are performing a scene where Strider kills Aragorn. He does this often. Back to the story.)
"Not fair, Mommy said I was the best!" the left, and somewhat weaker finger, moved and seemed to be complaining to the right. "Your mother made a mistake. I was supposed to be the best, she just couldn't tell us apart." " But," " No time for buts, I will now kill you!" "Boo hoo, boo hoo, boo Ahhhhhhh!" Strider screamed. By this time you should know he screams like a women. Sam had just tapped Strider on the shoulder. Sam looked around the woods and saw tons of discarded finger puppets lying in a box next to them.
"Who makes all these?" he asked.
"I do!" said Strider defensively. "And I use them three times a day!"
" You need to get yourself a girl, mate." Sam sat down next to Strider. "I can help you there." Strider moved away from Sam.
"You know, Sam isn't short for Samwise, it's short for Samantha." Strider looked down at his finger puppets again. "What does Aragorn do when Sam is short for Samantha?" he asked frantically. His left finger moved. " Run!!!!!!!!" as he proceeded to do just that.
* * *
The five creatures walked cross country. Strider led, followed by Frodo and the Ring, then Merry, Pippin and Sam with Bill the pony. Even Bill seemed to be very cautious of Sam. Meanwhile, Pippin was complaining about not having enough food.
" That's so human-like, not to stop for breakfast." He whined. That confused the already messed up Strider.
"You already had it." He stated plainly, clearly not understanding a hobbits need for food.
"We've had one, yes," he countered, "What about second breakfast?"
" Oh, second breakfast." Strider repeated dumbly, still not getting it.
"You stop and have the second breakfast for the day." explained Merry. Normally Strider wouldn't of listened to them but the idea of stopping.
"Sounds great!" said Strider cheerfully, "Food and .Pillows! I told you not to bring your pillows Sam!" he leapt up, jumped in a mud puddle, and ran to stamp on the pillow Sam had just unpacked.
"Clearly the Nazgul aren't the only Middle-Earthlings to have something against pillows." Merry whispered to Pippin. All four hobbits watched silently as Strider stomped around like the mad man he is, chanting something that sounded like "Evil hobbits on evil pillows with evil Samantha. Destroy pillows, destroy evil pillows. DESTROY EVIL OWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Strider had hit himself on the head with the hilt of his sword. "Stupid sw..wait a minute," and he drew his sword and promptly began stabbing the pillow to death. The sword was swung so wildly about that the hobbits had to give him a twelve foot clearance.
" Curse the pillow. Curse it and all hobbits named Samantha!" Strider huffed as feathers flew in the air. "Die die die die!" he drew breath heavily as he stepped out of the mess that used to be a pillow. He stared at the hobbits. The hobbits stared back.
"Please walk ahead of us." said Pippin, wishing he had never asked for second breakfast.
"Yes," added Merry, "Very far ahead.please." He added hurriedly, praying he would not become the next pillow. So Strider did as they asked and walk very far ahead. So far ahead that he lost them as he entered the forest.
That wasn't very Aragorn-like," Strider scolded himself, "After all, I am Aragorn now. I, not my evil twin, will be King of Gondor. Mwahahahahaha!!!"
"What do you mean?" asked a voice identical to Strider's. It was Aragorn.
"What are you doing here, Ear of Corn?" Strider had always called him that ever since he found out Aragorn was allergic to corn. Upon hearing the insult, Aragorn's face was contorted with fury.
"Don't you dare call me that!" he glared at Strider for a moment before regaining his cool.
"I am here because Arwen just left. Something about Ringwraiths or, as intelligent people call them, Nazgul."
"Ohhhh," squealed Strider, "I call them Nazgul. I'm intelligent!"
"Really," said Aragorn mockingly, checking his nails, "In what ways?"
"I'm intelligent with a sword." These words were a harsh insult to Aragorn. He knew his twin was the best swordsmen in all Middle Earth. Aragorn stepped forward with unshielded hate in his eyes.
"Prove it!" he hissed, he voice cold as ice.
"Okee dokee!" said Strider brightly as he unsheathed his sword, swung it about and let Aragorn's severed head fall to the ground. The face had a look of surprise written on it, as though Aragorn didn't see it coming. The mouth hung open, blood trickling out of the left side, The eye seemed to move for a moment, then stopped. As Strider looked upon the dead body and head, the realization of what he had done sunk in. Strider's face lit up.
"He told me to proves it and proves it I did!" he sang happily, dancing around the trees.
"Strider, Strider is FREEE!!!!!!!!" He screamed so loud that the extremely lost hobbits easily found him. As he heard them approaching, he shoved the corpse under a bush but not before sticking his tongue out at his twin for the last time.
Replies to Reviews Thorn-Silvermoon: I think so too! Mystic Catface: Thx! Its always nice to have someone like your work!
A/N sorry about the spacing, my computer hates me. Well so does everyone else in this world so what else is new?
A/N For all those who hated the Sam/Frodo thing, its NOT slash. That's fixed in this chapter.
Chapter Two
Strider sat down next to a tree, finger puppets in hand. Making sure he was alone, he slipped them on his two pointer fingers. He cleared his throat,
"Now starting the number one finger puppet show of all time, Strider vs. Aragorn!" he said in his announcer voice.
"Now presenting..Strider! Yeah! Go Strider! You rule!" he cheered, mimicking a crowd of people. "And now, Aragorn! Boooooooooo! We Hate Aragorn! Someone call the zoo, we found their lost monkey! Boooooooooo!" Strider smiled to himself. "See," he said in an unnaturally squeaky voice and moving his right pointer finger at the same time. "The crowd loves me already!" "Whaaaaa!" he cried, moving his left pointer finger this time. (Just so you know, Strider is pretending that his right pointer finger is himself and Aragorn is his left pointer finger. The fingers are performing a scene where Strider kills Aragorn. He does this often. Back to the story.)
"Not fair, Mommy said I was the best!" the left, and somewhat weaker finger, moved and seemed to be complaining to the right. "Your mother made a mistake. I was supposed to be the best, she just couldn't tell us apart." " But," " No time for buts, I will now kill you!" "Boo hoo, boo hoo, boo Ahhhhhhh!" Strider screamed. By this time you should know he screams like a women. Sam had just tapped Strider on the shoulder. Sam looked around the woods and saw tons of discarded finger puppets lying in a box next to them.
"Who makes all these?" he asked.
"I do!" said Strider defensively. "And I use them three times a day!"
" You need to get yourself a girl, mate." Sam sat down next to Strider. "I can help you there." Strider moved away from Sam.
"You know, Sam isn't short for Samwise, it's short for Samantha." Strider looked down at his finger puppets again. "What does Aragorn do when Sam is short for Samantha?" he asked frantically. His left finger moved. " Run!!!!!!!!" as he proceeded to do just that.
* * *
The five creatures walked cross country. Strider led, followed by Frodo and the Ring, then Merry, Pippin and Sam with Bill the pony. Even Bill seemed to be very cautious of Sam. Meanwhile, Pippin was complaining about not having enough food.
" That's so human-like, not to stop for breakfast." He whined. That confused the already messed up Strider.
"You already had it." He stated plainly, clearly not understanding a hobbits need for food.
"We've had one, yes," he countered, "What about second breakfast?"
" Oh, second breakfast." Strider repeated dumbly, still not getting it.
"You stop and have the second breakfast for the day." explained Merry. Normally Strider wouldn't of listened to them but the idea of stopping.
"Sounds great!" said Strider cheerfully, "Food and .Pillows! I told you not to bring your pillows Sam!" he leapt up, jumped in a mud puddle, and ran to stamp on the pillow Sam had just unpacked.
"Clearly the Nazgul aren't the only Middle-Earthlings to have something against pillows." Merry whispered to Pippin. All four hobbits watched silently as Strider stomped around like the mad man he is, chanting something that sounded like "Evil hobbits on evil pillows with evil Samantha. Destroy pillows, destroy evil pillows. DESTROY EVIL OWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Strider had hit himself on the head with the hilt of his sword. "Stupid sw..wait a minute," and he drew his sword and promptly began stabbing the pillow to death. The sword was swung so wildly about that the hobbits had to give him a twelve foot clearance.
" Curse the pillow. Curse it and all hobbits named Samantha!" Strider huffed as feathers flew in the air. "Die die die die!" he drew breath heavily as he stepped out of the mess that used to be a pillow. He stared at the hobbits. The hobbits stared back.
"Please walk ahead of us." said Pippin, wishing he had never asked for second breakfast.
"Yes," added Merry, "Very far ahead.please." He added hurriedly, praying he would not become the next pillow. So Strider did as they asked and walk very far ahead. So far ahead that he lost them as he entered the forest.
That wasn't very Aragorn-like," Strider scolded himself, "After all, I am Aragorn now. I, not my evil twin, will be King of Gondor. Mwahahahahaha!!!"
"What do you mean?" asked a voice identical to Strider's. It was Aragorn.
"What are you doing here, Ear of Corn?" Strider had always called him that ever since he found out Aragorn was allergic to corn. Upon hearing the insult, Aragorn's face was contorted with fury.
"Don't you dare call me that!" he glared at Strider for a moment before regaining his cool.
"I am here because Arwen just left. Something about Ringwraiths or, as intelligent people call them, Nazgul."
"Ohhhh," squealed Strider, "I call them Nazgul. I'm intelligent!"
"Really," said Aragorn mockingly, checking his nails, "In what ways?"
"I'm intelligent with a sword." These words were a harsh insult to Aragorn. He knew his twin was the best swordsmen in all Middle Earth. Aragorn stepped forward with unshielded hate in his eyes.
"Prove it!" he hissed, he voice cold as ice.
"Okee dokee!" said Strider brightly as he unsheathed his sword, swung it about and let Aragorn's severed head fall to the ground. The face had a look of surprise written on it, as though Aragorn didn't see it coming. The mouth hung open, blood trickling out of the left side, The eye seemed to move for a moment, then stopped. As Strider looked upon the dead body and head, the realization of what he had done sunk in. Strider's face lit up.
"He told me to proves it and proves it I did!" he sang happily, dancing around the trees.
"Strider, Strider is FREEE!!!!!!!!" He screamed so loud that the extremely lost hobbits easily found him. As he heard them approaching, he shoved the corpse under a bush but not before sticking his tongue out at his twin for the last time.
Replies to Reviews Thorn-Silvermoon: I think so too! Mystic Catface: Thx! Its always nice to have someone like your work!