A/N: Welcome back to the Fellowship Academy! Well, time for more classes! When do these kids sleep? Never! All day school! I mean...well, more teachers! I lied. Now we will see what Faramir has been doing, along with a list of available extra-cirricular activities!!! Merry and Pip come later.
Class Six: BIOLOGY and SCIENCE with FARAMIR
"Whoa. That Arwen is a piece of work, huh?" Asks Kid #5, scared that their next teacher will be scary and a freak too.
"Yeah. Say, what's our next class?" Asks Kid #1.
"Biology and the Sciences." Replies Kid #3.
"With?"
"Faramir."
"That odd bloke who almost became a human marshmallow?" asks Kid #2.
"Yep."
"I'm officially scared now." Says Kid #2.
"Hello, class!" says Faramir, smiling.
"Hey, dude!" says Kid #4.
"Uh..." says Faramir.
The class looks around, smiling some.
"Let's open our books and read chapter one." Faramir says, smiling, as he sits behind his desk with a mug of coffee.
"Why, sir?" asks Kid #2.
"Because I'm the teacher."
"So?"
"SO? WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU, KID??" Faramir screams, tossing a book at Kid #2.
"Hey! Calm down, spaz!" Kid #5 says.
"DON'T TELL ME TO CALM DOWN, YOU IDIOT!!" Faramir yells, throwing a coffee mug at Kid #5.
"Hey! Chill! Mr. Faramir? Faramir? Dude?" Asks Kid #1, who has just woken up.
"SHUT UP, YOU FRIGGIN' IDIOT!!" Faramir screams.
"We need to take him to Gandalf." Kid #3 says.
"Someone should get Gandalf." Kid #4 says, as Kid #2 starts to run out of the room.
"WAIT! You started this, you have to stay." Kid #4 says.
"FINE!" yells Kid #2.
Kid #4 runs out of the room, screaming for Gandalf. He is talking with Haldir, who is having a slight mental breakdown.
"I.../sob/...am.../sob/...not.../sob/...a.../sob/...pansy!!" Haldir says, crying, a box of tissues next to him.
"It's alright, Haldir." Gandalf says.
"No it's not!" He screams, throwing a tissue at Gandalf. If you've ever thrown a tissue, you know it doesn't go far. This makes Haldir feel even more like a pansy.
"Uh, Mr. Gandalf? Faramir has gone insane.." Kid #4 says, looking at Haldir.
"Hiya, Haldir-pansy." He says to Haldir, who breaks into violent sobs again.
"Uh, come on, Kid, let's go see Faramir. Stay here, Haldir." Gandalf says. "Eat some chocolate."
"O-o-ok." Haldir sobs, as he flips the TV to the Soap Opera Network.
"Now, what was that about Faramir?" Gandalf asks.
"He threw a book at another student! He tried to kill us!" Kid #4 says.
"Did you do anything to offend him?" Gandalf asks.
"Well, this Kid, we have no idea what is name is, could be Gaylord or something, argued with him about why we should read chapter one, and asked why he was the teacher." Kid #4 says.
"Oh, dear. Look. Faramir is sensitive. After almost being the Human Marshmallow, he's been feeling pretty bad about himself. So you need to not be mean to him." Gandalf says, as they burst into the room.
"Faramir! Stop!" Says a panicked Kid #5.
"It's no good! He's insane!" Says Kid #3, going red.
"WAIT!!" Screams Gandalf, looking at the kids.
"What, Mr. Gandalf, sir?" they ask.
"Everyone step away from the Steward." Gandalf says.
"He's a Steward?"
"He's a Steward."
"We don't understand."
"A Steward is a caretaker for the throne."
"Oh!" the Kids say, looking like they know it all.
"Now, I'm gonna take Faramir to my office, the rest of you, go outside and, uh, play, a...contact sport like American Football or Rugby." Gandalf says, forcing the Kids outside as he takes Faramir to his office.
"Faramir, what the hell went on in there?" Gandalf asks.
"They questioned my authority!! How dare they!!!" Faramir screams, trying to sock Gandalf in the nose.
"Calm down!!" Gandalf says, as Faramir and him reach his office. Haldir is once again sobbing for an unknown reason.
"What now?" Gandalf mutters.
"Tinuviel and Asfaloth have broken up on Elf's General Hospital!!" Haldir sobs.
Meanwhile, outside the Cafeteria....
"Look! The extra-curricular list!" Screams Kid #3.
"What's it say?" Asks Kid #2.
This is what the list reads:
EXTRA-CURRICULARS:
Math Club: Gandalf
Football: Aragorn
Gardening Club: Samwise Gamgee
Debate Club/Team: Boromir
Boy's Basketball: Boromir
Fine Arts: Faramir
Chess Club: Elrond
Backgammon/Parcheesi Club: Arwen
Elvish Club: Legolas
Karate Club: Eowyn
Tennis Team: Gimli
Book Club: Galadriel
REQUIRED PROGRAMS:
Counseling: Boromir, Faramir
Advanced Counseling: Frodo
Overcoming Addictions/D.A.R.E.: Gollum
Career Advice: Haldir
SPECIAL CLASSES:
Library: Haldir
Computer: Elrond
A/N: Yes, Tinuviel and Asfaloth. I was looking through the book and picked out two Elvish names. So, yeah. That is the list of EC's. Enjoy! Next, we discover why Math is bad for your health. And now that you know all the teachers, most of your favorites are here! Yay! Enjoy my story!! And there was some poking fun at Soap Operas, Elf's General Hospital is the rip-off of General Hospital. With wishes of Fritos---Anduril