Hiro was the first to awake the next morning. The golden sunrays poured through the sides of the curtains, brightening up the room instantly. Being ever so careful so as if not to wake Suguru up, he got out of bed, stretched, and then walked into the kitchen to throw a pot of coffee on. He stole a pastry from the white box on the counter and took a seat at the kitchen table, looking at the newspaper that was already brought in. No surprise he made the front cover again with his escape. Hiro began to read it, but then his mind soared off elsewhere, while his eyes kept reading the paper. He thought about Shuichi. The last time he had seen his friend was last night after the argument. Was Shuichi really jealous of Suguru? Did he really want to be his? It was hard to tell, and very confusing to try and figure out.
As if right on cue, Shuichi walked into the kitchen, still half asleep and heading to the freshly brewing coffee with his head down and feet dragging across the floor as he walked. He seemed to be ignoring Hiro. Hiro didn't know if that was on purpose, or if it was just because he was tired.
When there was enough coffee brewed to fill Shuichi's favorite mug, he brimmed it and took a seat at the table across from Hiro with a tired moan. Hiro held the newspaper in front of his face and pretended not to notice him. He wanted Shuichi to break the ice first.
"Hiro..." he started in a tiny voice.
Hiro glanced past the paper to his tired best friend. Shuichi had his head down.
"I know you're ignoring me," he murmured. "I'm not ignoring you, Shuichi, I'm just confused at what I should be doing with this friendship, that's all." Shuichi shook his head tiredly. "No. You're right. We don't have anything." Hiro put the paper down. "Yes we do Shuichi. We have a tighter bond than any two people in this world." "Not you and Suguru," he countered. "I have never been okay with him joining the group either. Never have. Never will." Hiro shook his head with a sigh. "Shuichi you know just as well as I do that we would be nowhere without him. He saved us. He saved Bad Luck." "He also made you a criminal on the run," Shuichi said honestly. "Along with Tachi's right hand men." "I'm not a criminal on the run if I've never done anything. You know what I think Shuichi, I think you're jealous." "Jealous?!" Shuichi parroted loudly, then glaring over at Hiro. "You have some nerve!" "And tell me why I shouldn't be feeling this way? Ever since I got here, you've been trying to force Suguru away from me. I don't know what to do anymore. I don't have any idea on what you want from me." Shuichi lowered his head and closed his eyes. "I just want the truth," he whispered. "Truth about what?" Hiro asked, half annoyed and half wondering what he was talking about. "Have you slept with him?" Shuichi kept his eyes and head lowered, and didn't even look up when Hiro hesitated to respond to the question.
"No Shuichi, I did not sleep with him, that is the truth. But whether I do or not is none of your business," he said low. "I don't snoop in yours and Eiri's relationships, it's not fair that you would do so with mine."
Shuichi, still in the same position, nodded. "I understand. Friends would usually tell friends when that sort of thing would happen, just for show and tell, but whatever Hiro. If you're just so confident with your relationship, go ahead and keep everything to yourselves."
Hiro frowned. Just what was Shuichi getting at.
"I don't understand," he said honestly. "Why are you so interested in hearing about us?"
"Just so I can practice on what I need to do to make you want me as your lover."
Hiro balled his fist tenderly and delivered it onto the tabletop with ease, loud enough to get his body language across. "Shuichi, stop it. Stop it right now, dammit. There are a ton of things going wrong with my life right now, plus I'm a criminal on the run. I really don't need for you to be throwing yourself at me right now, or ever for that matter. I appreciate what you and Eiri are doing for me in letting me stay here, but I can't, nor will I ever, be with you."
Shuichi looked up. The seriousness in Hiro's face would never be forgotten.
"Like I said, you lost your chance twice. I love Suguru and we are very happy together. Please don't try to come in between us again. I love you Shuichi, but only in the way you taught me how. Friendship."
Hiro stood up and left the kitchen, leaving Shuichi to pout at the table. Why was he so quick to get his hands on Hiro? Were things not going right with he and Yuki? He had never been this possessive before. It was almost kind of frightening.
Hiro walked back into the guest room to see Suguru still sleeping soundly, breathing low through his nose, but just loud enough to be heard by Hiro's ears. Hiro smiled and lightly laid beside Suguru in the direction he was facing. Still smiling at his beauty, thanking whatever god above that still kept them together, Hiro lightly brushed his fingertips across Suguru's cheek lovingly. Suguru's cheeks were sensitive and it didn't take him long to bring his hand to his face and itch his cheek, still in his sleep. Hiro chuckled. He did it once more, and that finally woke up his sleeping beauty.
"Hello sleepyhead," Hiro said.
Suguru just moaned, stretched, and then yawned before finally saying his morning greetings. Hiro lay down on the pillow so that they faced each other, eye to eye.
"Sleep well?" he asked, holding into Suguru's hand and rubbing his thumb on the surface.
"Not really," came Suguru's reply. "I had another dream about Tohma. It wasn't a dream, it was more of a nightmare."
"Do you want to talk about it?"
Suguru sighed before speaking. "I was with you in the park, holding hands, acting like lovers, and then all of a sudden the world turns black and you disappear. At first I start running endlessly looking for you, crying out your name, begging for you to return to me. I ran, but you were nowhere to be found and everything was still black. I kept telling you I loved you and I wanted you back, but nothing happened, then I fell to my knees and cried, only looking up moments later to a call of my name by a familiar voice. I look up and it's Tohma, smiling down at me with that cheerful trademark smile he always gave. It warmed me up inside and my tears dissolved right away as he helped me to my feet. I then said to him "I thought you were dead, I thought you were dead!" while hugging him tightly. It felt so real too, I really felt his warmth against me."
When Suguru started to cry, Hiro comforted him. "You don't have to continue."
Suguru shook his head. "No, that's okay, I want to. He then told me he was dead, and that he knew who killed him. This is the frightening part. He leaned over to my ear and whispered a name, and I actually felt his breath against my ear. It's like he really did it in my sleep."
"What did he say?" Hiro asked, heart pounding with hope that this could be over.
"He said a name, but I was too fixated on his breath and warmth against me to fully comprehend it."
"Do you remember anything?" Hiro asked, praying Suguru would at least remember something.
Suguru nodded, much to Hiro's delight. "He said...something with a strong E sound. I know it sounds nuts, but that's the only syllable I heard."
"That at least narrows it down a little bit. Gets K and Noriko off the list."
Suguru nodded blankly, trying to think of something. He had wished he had heard his cousin's voice and was not so focused on his breathing.
"The only one I can think of is Eiri."
Suguru was unsure on that and shook his head slowly.
"It has to be Eiri! He killed once he can kill again!"
Suguru placed his hand over Hiro's. "Hiro, stop it. It was just a dream, a figment of my imagination in what I wanted to hear."
"No I don't think so. I think it was something more. I believe that Tohma came and told you because he trusts you to find out the truth. I bet he's what's keeping us together and staying strong."
"You mean to tell me my cousin is what's keeping us together, not love?"
Wrong thing to say? Hiro had to rethink what he said.
"No of course not Suguru. There's love. I love you. I've told you this."
"You didn't used to love me before my cousin died. It just happened all of a sudden after he left this world," Suguru said, feeling a sudden depression. "Maybe it is Tohma's doing."
Hiro sighed. "I'm sorry Suguru, I didn't mean for it to come out that way. Even if it is his doing, I've never been happier in my life. And yes I did start to like you before he died and my god will I help you and do anything for you to find this guy and make him pay."
Hiro cupped Suguru's chin and lead the boy into a sweet kiss.
"I love you," he whispered into his mouth. "Tohma or no Tohma."
Suguru sealed himself to Hiro, sharing body warmth. Even though all of this was going on, he had a strong urge to become Hiro's fully. He knew there was something keeping them apart and if it wasn't now, it was never. Anything could happen and he knew that.
"Make love to me, Hiro," Suguru whispered as if in a trance. "I need your love."
Hiro was taken back by this request. After just getting done speaking of some dream and crying, all of a sudden this was taking place on the young teen's mind?
"Suguru, you don't know what you're saying."
Suguru shifted his tiny frame so that he was now lying on top of Hiro, looking at him straight in the eyes. "I know what I'm saying. I want to get closer to you. I want to feel the pleasure you have for me."
Hiro hardened on the spot when Suguru moved himself so he lined up with Hiro's lower region and thrust his hips down. Hiro groaned with the ferociousness it brought. Suguru smiled. He had Hiro under his control.
Hiro, still being in boxer shorts, was noticeably hard by now. Suguru continued his onslaught and moved his hips on and around Hiro's sensitive area, watching him writhe in excitement. This made the two forget immediately about what was going on outside and forget whose house they were at.
Hiro felt the urge to take over. Suguru yelped as Hiro grabbed him by the arms and threw him on the bed, changing places. Hiro grinned eagerly and lovingly.
"You're so quick," Suguru said.
Hiro continued to grin. "Oh I know."
"No wonder I love you so much, Hiroshi Nakano."
Suguru reached his arm up around the back of Hiro's neck and pushed him down so that their lips met. Hiro traveled his right hand down Suguru's bare chest and to the midsection. Since they were both wearing boxers it was rather easy to get aroused behind the thin material. Hiro took advantage of the situation and touched his lover for the first time. Suguru gasped under the kiss.
"Are you sure you want this?"
Suguru didn't have to be asked twice. He's wanted to become this close to Hiro since the moment they declared their love for each other.
"Oh Hiro, I've never wanted anything more."
Hiro placed his lips back over his lover's and slid a warm hand inside Suguru's boxers, fondling his member teasingly slowly, making Suguru moan to the new sensation.
When Suguru got to the point of crying into Hiro's mouth, Hiro lifted his head up to stare into Suguru's beautiful brown eyes.
"Please don't tease me, Hiro, please," Suguru said, relieved that Hiro's torture had stopped. Suguru had become hard fast and any other form of contact would end this early for him.
"Suguru...what about the candles and the jacuzzi dream you've always talked about? Right now...would ruin that fantasy. Right now I want you more than anything else in the world. I've wanted to do this since day one."
"Then do it Hiro. I don't care about the candles and the jacuzzi, all I want is you. I don't care what's going on."
Hiro caressed Suguru's face slowly with the tips of his fingers, smiling at the young boy. "You mean more to me than anything else in the world and if this is what you want, I will give it to you."
"I want it from you...just you," Suguru whispered and pulled Hiro's head down into a kiss. Hiro shifted himself and removed Suguru's boxers, releasing his member from its seal, allowing it to be free.
"Is this your first time?" Hiro whispered.
"You know it is, Hiro," Suguru responded, feeling a tad scared about the pain he would receive from being a virgin. But as long as it was with Hiro, he could feel pain a million times over and not mind it a bit.
"I'll be gentle, I promise."
Suguru nodded.
"Are you ready?"
When Suguru nodded a second time, Hiro's boxer shorts came off and thrown carelessly onto the floor somewhere. When both members touched, flames lit in each one's stomachs and hisses escaped clenched teeth. Suguru didn't even know how pleasurable it was to get this close to Hiro. Hiro's hips grinded against Suguru's, feeling as if he wasn't getting close enough. It was only when Suguru cried out that Hiro's mind jumped back down to earth and stopped his aggressive assault.
"What's wrong?"
"It hurts," Suguru said, eyes watering.
"I didn't even do anything," Hiro said. "Loosen up a little bit. Don't tense yourself and it won't hurt."
Suguru relaxed his body. Hiro threw the blanket over them and then traveled down Suguru's body, covering the blanket over Suguru's chest so he couldn't see what he was doing, only feeling.
Suguru willingly allowed Hiro to configure his body into the positions he wanted. Hiro bent Suguru's legs at the knees and pushed them apart. The young boy felt helpless against the older man's attack.
His head was thrown back when the most incredible feeling he had ever experienced caused chills to run up and down his spine. Hiro's experienced mouth covered Suguru's length wholly. Hiro relaxed his gag reflexes and was able to pleasure Suguru beyond words. Suguru fisted the sheets and struggled to keep his groans to a minimum so they wouldn't attract any visitors, but proved useless when Hiro's tongue hit the most sensitive areas, causing him to cry out.
He thrust his hips, desperately wanting more out of this. Looking down, all he could see was Hiro's head underneath the comforter moving up and down.
This was it; Suguru couldn't take anymore. He shook the earth when he screamed and came into Hiro's mouth. The most violent of all orgasms swept through his trembling body. Beads of sweat grazed his forehead and breathing became a problem. Hiro placed a sweaty hand over his lover's heartbeat, which felt as if it were going to beat right out of his chest.
It had gotten to the point where Suguru had to gasp for air.
"Are you okay?" Hiro asked, coming out from underneath the covers, breathing heavily and sweating as well, due to the lack of air.
Before Suguru could do anything but nod, the door was flung open and in stepped an angry couple. Eiri looked extremely pissed while Shuichi looked stunned. Hiro bounced off of Suguru and sat up, still covered up.
"What the hell's going on in here?" Eiri asked in a bit of a growl.
Suguru had just now realized what had caused them to come forth.
"You woke up the damn world with your yell!" Eiri said to Suguru, who was blushing furiously. "If you must do it, the least you can do is keep it down."
Eiri left. Shuichi just stood in the doorway. He didn't know how far it had gotten between them. For all he knew, they went the whole way. There was a hush of silence. Shuichi looked as if he were going to cry. Suguru knew what was bothering him and attempted to grab Hiro's hand to show Shuichi that Hiro belonged to him and him only. Shuichi saw this gesture and left, slamming the door behind them.
Hiro sighed. "He just won't give up."
"Do you still love him?"
That was the ultimate question. Suguru awaited an answer and got scared when he didn't get one.
"I...don't know. No. No I don't. He broke my heart one too many times and it's not going to happen anymore. I spent too many nights crying over him and I've had it. I love you Suguru, that's it. No one else. Just you."
He leaned over and kissed him. The kiss was sweet and Hiro's hot breath tickled Suguru's bottom lip.
"It's too bad they ruined the mood."
"Is it possible that it gets better than what we just did?" Suguru asked.
Hiro only smiled. "You have no idea."
Shuichi and Hiro weren't on speaking terms for the next few hours. Shuichi wasn't angry, just heartbroken. Eiri was enjoying the solemn Shuichi, relishing every moment of it. He was able to get a few pages of his new novel he was working on while Hiro and Suguru cuddled up on the couch and watched TV.
"Is it possible they've given up the search?" Suguru asked, head on Hiro's stomach, lightly moving up and down with it every time he breathed. They were both enjoying the peace and quiet, but at the same time, found it almost quite disturbing.
"I don't know," Hiro said, petting Suguru from the head down to his outer thigh. "But it's rather nice."
"Yeah but before you know it, someone's going to be knocking on the door, then what? Wouldn't this be an obvious place to look?"
Hiro shrugged. Suguru felt the motion. "Well...sure I suppose. I'm sure they know that Shuichi's my friend. But I see it this way, if was that obvious, they would have been here by now."
"With Shindou's jealousy, I'm surprised he hasn't called the cops already, telling them that you were here."
Hiro chuckled. "Shuichi wouldn't do that. We love each other. We will always be the best of friends. I trust him, that's why I'm here."
"You know what I keep thinking, Hiro?"
"What's that?"
"The dream with Tohma. I can't get over how real that was. It was just so...lifelike. It felt so wonderful to be close to my cousin again...I just wish that whomever did it would just confess. Wouldn't they feel awful?"
"I'm sure they're just as scared as we are."
"Hey Fujisaki."
Suguru looked over to the doorway and saw Eiri holding the phone.
"It's that child superstar."
Suguru knew who it was right off the bat, but had no idea why he would be calling here.
"Hello?"
"I don't deserve Kumagoro anymore, Fujisaki-san," came the sobbing voice of Ryuichi Sakuma.
Suguru's face went into a frown. "What are you talking about, Sakuma-san? What happened this time? Did you wet the bed again?"
Ryuichi had done this before. He always says he has reasons to dump his precious bunny rabbit and it was usually something dumb.
Suguru sighed. "Ryu-kun, I'm sure whatever it is you did, Kumagoro will forgive you. I'm sure it was nothing serious."
Ryuichi was in hysterics. "It was serious this time! I wanted to call Shuichi, but he might be mad at me and you know Nakano-san, so you would understand me. I meant to say something before but I couldn't! Kuma told me that he would never speak to me again and spent the last few months hiding in the corner!"
Suguru frowned and turned away from Hiro. "What did you do, Ryu-kun? I'll go over and have a talk with Kumagoro and see if he forgives you."
Hiro rolled his eyes and muttered under his breath. Suguru couldn't believe he was talking like this to a full-grown man.
"No one knows, Fujisaki-kun. I'm scared of what they'll do to me. I'm scared of what people will think."
"Who?"
"I can't even sleep! I keep seeing him in my dreams! I meant to confess but I was so scared!"
Suguru's heart sped up.
"I can't wash the blood off my hands! Scalding hot water won't work either!"
Suguru felt himself weaken at the knees. "Sakuma-san, what are you talking about? You know what, never mind, I'll be right there."
Suguru ran nonstop alone to Noriko's where Ryuichi was staying for the time being. His mind was cluttered with thoughts of everything. Ryuichi not being able to wash blood off? Maybe he killed an animal or something and felt guilty. It had to be that. It just couldn't be what he had thought it was. No. He couldn't just jump to conclusions and think the worst.
When he walked in the door, Ryuichi flung himself at him and sobbed on his shoulder. "I don't deserve Kumagoro anymore! I threw him out the window and into the dirt!"
Suguru pulled him away and held him by the shoulders. "Sakuma-san, please, tell me what happened. I want to help you."
Ryuichi's face was tear stained and his hands were trembling and blistered from hot water.
"I wanted to tell someone. I had so many opportunities, but I'm scared!"
As much as Suguru promised himself that he wouldn't jump to any assumptions, but he was running out of suggestions and everything was fitting nicely together.
"Ryu-kun...does this have to do with my cousin?"
Ryuichi fell to his knees. "We had a fight that day. After he left, I got drunk and tried to get rid of my problems. I've never yelled at him before like that and I felt awful."
Suguru's mouth went dry and salty. Butterflies swarmed in his stomach and his head grew dizzy.
"Tachi bribed me when I was wasted. He gave me a weapon and told me how to use it. My band member's blood is on my hands Suguru! I'm so scared. I'm scared to death. I tried to say something but it just wouldn't come out! I didn't mean to watch Hiro be pulled around left and right from cell to cell and go to trial, I just...I was just scared! Tachi had made sure I didn't say anything. That's why I was out of it for those few days after the funeral and I had an outer body experience towards you. I'm sorry if I hurt you."
Suguru tried to contain himself as his head spun. This was it, it was finally over. Hiro was free to go. But getting Ryuichi to tell the rest of the world was going to be a hard one...or would it?
Ryuichi apologized a hundred times over the course of fifteen minutes, but it was nearly making Suguru nauseated. He was speaking to the man who murdered his cousin in cold blood. Still, he couldn't hate Ryuichi. Even though Ryuichi had done some horrible things to him in the past as well, he couldn't do it.
Ryuichi had made it perfectly clear on how much he loved Tohma and would die a thousand times over in the most gruesome death to prove it. He also explained to Suguru that he planned on joining him once this was out in the open.
"Sakuma-san please just don't talk anymore," Suguru said, clenching his stomach. His best friend and employer was dead because of him. It just couldn't be comprehended. It was so difficult to think it was real.
"You hate me now," Ryuichi said in a low voice. "But that's okay, I hate myself too. Noriko told me how much Hiroshi-san loves you, so I knew I had to say something before they found him."
"Does anyone else know what happened?"
Ryuichi shook his head. "Only you and me. But don't worry because after this, I will be paying my respects to him by giving him my life."
Suguru took his hands. "Ryu-kun, you know that I don't mean any harm against you and no you shouldn't go joining Tohma because that's not what he would want. He's well aware that it was an accident, a sick joke made up by Tachi, but if you don't tell the authorities about this, they're going to send an innocent man to the death. I'm not just saying this because I so happen to love and worship the one they're doing it to, it's...just...oh please Ryuichi...I don't want to see Hiro die. I have two parents that would not hesitate to put him to the death like they did to Tachi."
Ryuichi traced a streak that was left over by a tear that fell down from Suguru's eye just seconds before. He wore a tiny smile of comfort.
"I don't want to see him die either, Suguru. Even though Bad Luck was considered my rival pretty much, there's nothing I can do about it now, because of Tohma being gone, Nittle Grasper is certainly no more, so I want Shuichi and the rest of you to continue. Continue for me. I want you to be a success for yourselves, and for Tohma. I'm positive they won't have CD players or a radio where I'm going, so I'll just have to trust that you're future is being accomplished the way you want it to be...successfully done."
Suguru knew where Ryuichi was to be going. He took his hand and placed it over his cheek and cried. Ryuichi had his heart set on the destination and would not break it, no matter who tried to talk him out of it. He suddenly felt at ease and peaceful.
"Go on and live your life. My time in this world is over."
Voila! And there we have it, Ryuichi Sakuma. It was going to be him all along, I just didn't know how to add in clues that he was the murderer. The dream thing was real corny and was on a debate on whether or not it should be taken out. There's one more chapter after this, basically dealing with Hiro and his new life. I rushed the scene, I know, but I was running out of ideas and needed to finish this fic quickly and update all my others. I hope I didn't disappoint everyone with the ending here and personal thank you's will be given out to all who reviewed and kept reviewing throughout this fic in the final chapter. I couldn't have done it without everyone's wonderful comments. Thanks again!! I am entirely grateful