An Invader ZIM Fanfiction by SpookyChild
Author's Notes:
Whoa. I'm updating. Go me. I'm lazy and I don't feel like writing hilarious authors notes.
Disclaimer: No.
-----------------------
Chapter Two-----------------------
"Okay, this will do for the time being." Zim stated, looking at a pile of sticks he deemed to be the 'safe-house'. "Come, Gir. We will rest here tonight, and tomorrow we will venture out to find some sort of transmitter so we can contact the Tallest and request help." Zim looked skeptically at the pile and turned to Gir. "Go check to see if it is safe enough to house us."
Gir shrugged and crawled into the opening. "It smells like pumpkin juice in here!" He exclaimed. Zim raised his invisible eyebrow.
"Pumpkin juice? What is this pumpkin juice?" He asked. Gir shrugged from inside the safe house.
"It's what Harry Potter drinks!"
Zim only looked more confused. "Harry Potter? Is this Harry Potter some sort of threat to the mission?" Zim asked with a paranoid glance behind his shoulder, as if expecting The-Boy-Who-Just-Wouldn't-Freakin'-Die to attack him.
"Only if you're Voldemort!" Gir exclaimed. Zim blinked.
"…No more watching the BBC channel for you, Gir. Now, is it safe inside?" He asked.
"It's fine!" Gir called out happily. Zim got down on his hands and knees and crawled into the safe house and sat besides Gir. He looked around cautiously before relaxing.
"Okay, it will suffice for the time being- THE SQUIRRELS! THE SQUIRRRRRLESSSSS!" He screamed as millions of squirrels flooded into the safe house and began biting and scratching at the Irken Invader. Gir giggled happily and hugged a few of the rabid squirrels to him.
"Aww, Master! The squirrels like us!" The robot exclaimed shrilly. Zim only screamed louder.
"THEY BURN! THE HORRIBLE RODENTS BURN!" Just as he said that, the squirrels began to head out of the safe house, leaving Zim lying on the ground twitching with pieces of his flesh gone. Just when he thought it was safe to get up, four large German Shepherds bounded into the safe house and jumped onto Zim, biting and shaking him roughly. Gir squealed happily.
"Aww, the puppies like us too!" He hugged the nearest dog to him.
"AH! THE DOGS! THE DOGS OF DEATH!" Zim screamed, writhing on the ground. Finally, the dogs seemed to get bored and one by one they left.
"Bye puppies!" Gir cried, waving crazily at them. Zim moaned and sat up a little.
"Oh, thank the Tallest that they're gone- AH! THE GORILLAS! THEY HUUUURT! "
"Gaz, did you eat all the Pop-Tarts?" Dib asked, closing the cabinet door. Gaz didn't look away from the television.
"No. The puppy did." She claimed. Dib raised his eyebrow and looked around.
"Uh, Gaz, we don't have a puppy." He stated uncertainly. Gaz frowned.
"Then who ate all the Pop-Tarts?!" She asked angrily. Dib blinked.
"Well, you see, it was…" Dib then turned around and ran up the stairs to his room. He hurriedly slammed the door and sat down at his computer, bringing up a program. "Okay, now I just have to trace Zim's location, thanks to the genius Alien Detector I secretly planted on him a few weeks ago."
Flashback
The scene changes to a few weeks ago. Zim is sitting in the school cafeteria when Dib walks up to him.
"SO ZIM," he began, fiddling with something is his pockets and obviously trying to keep Zim focused on his loud voice. "I WAS WONDERING IF YOU HAD SOME… SCHOOL… THINGS…" Dib then pulled a small device from his pocket and stapled it to the top of Zim's head before running away.
"AHHH!" Zim screamed, falling to the floor and writhing in agony. "THIS IS THE WORST PAIN EVER!"
End flashback
"Man, I am so stealthy… LIKE A NINJA!" Dib snickered and typed up something on the computer. A large map appeared with an arrow pointing to a place just five miles from where Dib, himself, was. Dib grinned evilly. "Laugh now, Zim, because tomorrow, IT! GETS! PERSONAL!"
"I hate you." Gaz announced from the doorway.
Zim scratched absentmindedly at the large, blinking object on his head, which had 'This is not, I repeat, NOT an Alien Detector. Love, Dib' written on the side of it. Zim frowned.
"GIR! What was the name of the restaurant that we purchased that…DEATH COOKIE from?!" He demanded loudly.
"FUNKTOWN!" Gir exclaimed.
"Good job, Gir! So, tomorrow, after we contact the Tallest, we will enter that Chinese place of PORK-!" Zim blinked. "…WAIT A MINUTE! Gir, what was the real name?!" Gir's eyes went red and he immediately saluted Zim.
"SIR! The name of the Chinese restaurant you seek was entitled 'The Happy Rice Box'!" He announced. Zim jumped up dramatically.
"TOMORROW, THE INHABITANTS OF 'THE HAPPY RICE BOX' WILL FACE MY VENGEANCE! AND MY VENGEANCE SHALL INVOLVE MANY EXPLOSIONS AND BOOBIES!"
"I like boobies!" Gir shrieked, dancing around.
-----------------------
(A/N)
So, there it is! Will Zim become Voldemort and have Harry Potter threaten his mission? Is Dib stealthy like a ninja? Will there be sexual tension between Zim and Dib when Zim realizes that the writing on the Alien Detector says, "Love, Dib" and not "From, Dib"? Will the men in the audience get to see explosions and boobies? These questions will not be answered in the next chapter, but other things will happen. Stay tuned!
Thank you!
