Not Myself
By Princess Alexandria
Princess_alex24@hotmail.com


Christy sighed yet again while sitting in her office trying to concentrate enough to grade papers.  She had been working on trying to find a way to invite the X-men to dinner all night and all day, but it seemed impossible to do it without giving away the fact that she realized they were the X-men.

She grumbled sarcastically to herself.  "Gee, I know all sorts of things you probably wouldn't want anyone to know about you all… why not stay for dinner.  Really I'm not a homicidal maniac." 

She glared at the paper in front of her.  That boy still didn't learn to type his work.  In her current mood she just wrote that she wasn't grading anymore of these half done papers along with a failing grade.  If her half done excuses wouldn't be good enough for the X-men, and she knew they wouldn't be, he wasn't getting away with plain laziness.

"Emma's gonna try to drill another hole in my head."  Christy grimaced at the remembered pain from last time.  "I better get more aspirin."  She pulled out a post it and wrote the reminder down.  Her concentration was so shot from her lack of sleep and her nervousness that she wasn't going to trust herself to remember anything today.  It was also the reason that she'd resorted to talking to herself again.  She always did that when she was too distracted to follow her own thoughts without saying them.  "Thank God for small favors.  They'd really be worried if they could read me." 

The day at work was one of the longest in a while.  Christy noticed Annie look at her in concern a few times when she was having trouble following what her students were asking during class.  She'd apparently lost quite a few I.Q. points lately.

********

"Are you okay?"  Annie asked softly after they'd finished with the first class.  She'd waited quietly until they'd gotten to the privacy of Christy's office.  The woman was starting to worry Annie.  She'd only seen her this distracted and haunted looking at home before, and only rarely.  Christy never told her what was wrong then and Annie didn't expect she'd be getting any answers now either.  It was so frustrating to want to help and not be allowed to.

"I'm fine, just distracted."  Christy gave Annie a weak smile that didn't fool anyone.

Annie moved closer to Christy and couldn't seem to stop her hand from moving out to push some hair out of Christy's eyes.  Her voice was soft and tender.  "You know you can talk to me don't you?  If something's wrong… We're a team."  Annie almost stared at her traitorous hand as she pulled it away.  She'd creep Christy out if she didn't learn to keep her hands to herself.  She might as well have declared her undying love.  She was getting too damned obvious.

"I know."  Christy sighed heavily.  "But I'm fine, really."  Annie watched Christy glance around the room.  "I could use help with the grading.  I'm falling behind."

********

Christy had changed her clothes three times before she came up with the perfect casual, I had no idea you were dropping by, but don't I look good outfit.  She grimaced into the mirror while she inspected the black jeans, t-shirt, and cotton button up shirt over it.  She went through a lot of effort to look like she had no idea visitors would be here.  It was ridiculous.   

She went upstairs and sat on the couch watching whatever mind numbing show the others had on.  "What time did he say he'd be here?"  She couldn't keep from asking as she glanced at Wolfsbane.

Erik answered, even though part of Christy was hoping that Wolfsbane would.  "Any minute now."  He didn't sound too pleased about that.  Christy sighed.  She'd forgotten that the kids thought they were losing a pet in her excitement.  She glanced around at the disappointed faces on the couch.  Telling them the obvious, that Wolf had people that cared about her and wanted her back seemed inappropriate.  These weren't kids they all knew that.

Christy glared at the "dog" that had caused this pain for a moment, until she noticed that Wolf had noticed her hostility.  She then just turned to stare out the window just in time to see a van pull into her driveway.  Oh God.  Her eyes widened a little as she watched a blonde woman step out of the passenger seat and stare up at her for a moment.  The others were getting out of the car as well.

"Wow, that's a big group to pick up Wolf."  Erik spoke quietly and Christy could see his eyes sparkle for a moment before a slightly troubled look came to his face.  "I can't read them."

"They have shields."  Christy turned back to the window to watch Scott close the van door.  None of them approached the house yet.

"How do you know?"  Erik was watching the group start towards the house with her, while the other kids seemed to be staring a hole in Christy's back.  Christy grimaced as she realized how quickly her mouth said things without thinking today.

"Don't worry.  They aren't the bad guys."  Christy sighed and was about to get up to answer the door, but Annie had already beat her to it.  She sat back down and pulled Wolfsbane closer to her while petting the mutant like she was a real dog.  Wolfsbane was her only leverage to get the others inside.  She wasn't going to just walk Wolfsbane to the door and let her go.  The way the entire team came up to the door made Christy think they weren't just going to take werewolf and leave, but she still worried they would.

********

Annie opened the door feeling more than a bit nervous.  Christy obviously knew something she wasn't telling them, and she hated not knowing what was going on.  The group at the door didn't all fit on the stairs.  A man in red glasses and a woman wearing all white stood closest.  Annie glanced past them at a large man and… was that the redhead from the library.  Annie felt her nervousness increase.  What was she doing here?  The last man was a bit shorter, but could possibly be a bodybuilder.  "Hello?" 

"Hi."  The man with the glasses smiled.  "We're here for Wolfsbane."  It took Annie a moment to figure out that must be Wolf's full name.

"Oh, I'll… get her?"  Annie didn't know how to respond to that.  They can't have all come for the dog.

"No, invite them in."  Christy's voice called down.  "We could order pizza or something."  Annie didn't manage to hide her look of disbelief as her jaw dropped.  She glanced up towards the living room but couldn't see Christy from her place at the door.

"Um… come in?"  Annie opened the door wider.  They didn't seem at all surprised by the invitation.  The man in the glasses smiled comfortingly as he passed by her and headed up the stairs. 

********

Jean nodded hello to the group of teenagers in the livingroom looking at them all with obvious questions in their eyes.  She also noticed several searching glances being sent Christy's way.

Even without telepathy it was clear the woman was nervous.  She stood up and moved towards Scott with a hint of a smile that seemed too tense to be real.  "Hi.  I'm Christy Taylor."

Emma was standing next to the fireplace and her irritated comment made Jean want to roll her eyes.  "Why don't you tell everyone who we are, since you seem to know so much."  Christy recoiled a bit at that venom.

"Ah…"  Jean watched the woman get just a hint paler.  Christy turned to glance once at her students and it was clear that whatever her secret was… and right now it was very clear it was a secret, she hadn't let the kids in on it.  After another moment Christy seemed to gain a resolve.  Jean wished she could read the woman's mind, it was far more exact than trying to interpret her body language.  "Guys,"  Christy addressed her students, who looked just a bit suspicious at this point.  "These people are from that school in New York I mentioned."

"So your mutants too?"  Annie spoke softly and Jean turned to smile gently at the girl next to her.

"Surely you can be more specific than that Ms. Taylor."  Emma glared at her.

"Emma…"  Jean shook her head.  This wasn't necessary.  Clearly the woman wasn't planning to fight and the kids weren't prepared for a battle.  These weren't the people that the X-men were hunting.  They could do this a bit more civilly.

********

Christy felt like a deer caught in headlights with Emma's hostility clearly aimed at her.  "I… what did I do to piss you off?"  Her own irritation was fueled by her lack of sleep.  She could understand the X-men wanting to verify she wasn't doing something wrong, but this kind of anger just didn't fit.  They couldn't read her, could they?

"Christy?"  Annie's concerned voice drew her attention back to her students and she finally noticed how tense they were.  It had to be intimidating have a group of mutants they didn't know decend on their home like this.  They had no idea who these people were and Christy's argument with one of them wouldn't be taken well.  Her students loved her and would definitely take offense if Emma tried to take her down a few pegs in front of them.  That wouldn't really help with Christy's plan to get some of them to consider going to Xavier's school.

"It's okay.  They really are the good guys."  Christy forced her tense muscles to relax.  She could feel the X-men staring at her waiting for something.  Christy turned to Scott and sighed.  "So pizza?"

"Pizza sounds good."  Scott was glancing around at the students.  Christy's small grin was real at that.  They were going to stay.

A brief and tense discussion went into just figuring out what type of pizza's to order and how many.  Christy gave Annie a grateful smile when the girl took that all down on paper and went to call and get them delivered.

Christy looked around the dining room and living room now.  Her students had easily interpreted her look and spread out so that the New York visitors could sit and mingle.

********

Emma glanced around the home as she stood leaning against the wall.  Jean and Hank were talking to Erik in the Living room, while Scott and Logan were at the dining room table with Jon and Jessi.  Annie was moving about like a hostess and Christy held up another wall.  Emma still intended to talk to that woman about what all she knew.  Her eyes narrowed as she concentrated on the woman.

"Please, I forgot to buy more aspirin.  Can you stop that."  Christy glanced right at her shortly after Emma tried yet again to get past that shield.

Emma raised one eyebrow at the woman correctly guessing it was her doing that and glanced over towards Scott to see he'd noticed the exchange.

Annie gave Christy a speculative look and moved closer to her.  The glance she gave Emma said it all.  Annie would not tolerate anyone hurting Christy and was beginning to seriously dislike Emma.  This was one girl Emma could scan so she did.  Annie's feelings were very intense, like Jean had said.  The girl saw Emma as a threat in a few ways.  Emma looked through Annie's memories so quickly the girl barely had time to blink, and she would never realize Emma was doing it.  Second hand information wasn't good enough, but for now it would have to do.  The children here had heard Christy talk about the X-men and the school several times and always wondered how she could know so much since she claimed to not really know other mutants.  They were a bit suspicious about this sudden visit since Christy had been trying to sell a few of them on going to Xavier's school.  It didn't seem like the sort of thing Christy would do, sneak behind their backs to bring recruiters to their house and Annie felt a bit betrayed.  Interesting.

"Can we talk outside."  Christy interrupted and Emma looked up to see the woman glare at her briefly.  "The Pizza man should be by soon anyhow."

Emma brushed her mind briefly against Scott's to let him know where she was going before just walking past Christy towards the stairs.  She didn't bother answering the question. 

"Annie, it's okay.  Just visit with everyone."  Emma stood impatiently at the door and watched the exchange between Christy and Annie.  Annie wasn't looking like she wanted Christy to go.

"Um… the pizza…"

"I know.  Don't worry about it."  Christy answered and Emma found they had their own shorthand communication going on.  Emma slipped into Annie's mind to interpret what had been said.  It was about money.  That was a bit of a surprise.  Annie was fully aware that the pizza's they'd ordered, and they had ordered a lot since Hank and Logan tended to eat quite a bit, cost more than Christy could afford.  These students were living that close to the edge financially.  Emma was surprised but didn't let that show.  Annie was starting to wonder what item of Christy's the woman would sell next to take care of them.  Christy had sold quite a few of her belongings since Annie moved in. 

Emma stepped outside when Christy started down the stairs and crossed her arms in front of her as she waited for the woman.  Christy was obviously not like the slime that took in young mutants to use them, she was losing her own belongings and money in order to keep these children here.  That was pretty much the opposite of the people getting rich off of the children they took in.

Still something was very odd about Christy and Emma intended to find out what it was.

********

Christy closed the door behind her, fully aware of Annie's watchful stare.  She and Emma had been tense since the woman had snapped at her.  It was clear Emma was angry, and it probably had something to do with her inability to read Christy.  Emma hated that.  She didn't like people being able to keep secrets from her.

There was also something else Christy had to say.  She wished she didn't doubt Emma like this, but the woman might try to mentally manipulate Christy's students to encourage them to go to Xavier's and while Christy wanted the kids to consider it, she wanted it to really be their choice.  The other X-men were currently asking questions about the kids mutations, what training they've done and telling the kids about the school.  That was what Christy wanted, for her students to get that chance.  Keeping Emma out of the recruiting here was probably a very good idea, perhaps Scott's after he'd noticed Emma pissing the kids off immediately with her hostility.  Unfortunately that left Emma paired with Christy, when it was clear Emma didn't care for her.

"I don't want you using your powers to convince them to go."  Christy spoke as soon as they'd moved off to the driveway and out of sight of curious teenagers that might try peeking out the window.  "If anyone decides to go I might have Jean double check it really was their decision."  Christy watched the blonde's eyes narrow at her.

"You are pretty quick to make accusations."  Emma's voice was clipped and angry.

"You've been pounding against my shields since you got here.  Forgive me if my patience isn't that great.  I have a headache."  Christy snapped back.  Her head did hurt, but nothing like that migraine from the day before.  Apparently one telepath is not as strong as two, so Jean had been a part of that torture then.  "I asked you to lay off.  You aren't gonna be able to get in.  All you're doing it causing pain."

"I noticed you didn't say anything about that inside."  Emma tilted her head just a little as she studied Christy.

"I want the kids to consider the school and if they knew what a bitch you were it might be a deal breaker."  Christy glared back.  Emma had continued with her probes after Christy had nicely asked her not to inside, but Annie and the kids would have been really upset and assumed Christy was under attack.  Dammit, all the things she liked about Emma weren't so endearing when they were right there.  Emma was vicious when in protect mode, and clearly that quality was now aimed at Christy.  "Why are you being…"  Christy shook her head.  Calling names wasn't really helpful.  "Why are you acting like this?  I thought… I mean, you helped me out.  I don't…"

"I helped you out because you lied.  I don't enjoy being played."

Christy's eyes went wider at that.  Her venom died down as she turned to face the woman fully.  "I… I did what I had to.  Erik was projecting nightmares all over the house and couldn't stand even going to the grocery store."  Christy glanced over at the van in her driveway.  She'd done what she used to do and took the easy way out.  She'd lied to get what she wanted, because it would have been difficult to deal with the questions, but the X-men came to her bringing their questions anyhow.  She hadn't lied much, just claiming to have lost Jean's number, but she could tell Bobby assumed that she knew a lot more than she really should and she'd let him.  Her voice got softer.  "I'm in over my head with him and I know it.  I panicked."  She didn't want to be angry at Emma, and this attitude of Emma's made a lot more sense now that she knew where it came from.  She wouldn't have lied to Emma like that, it was Bobby she'd played, but that backfired pissing off the one X-men that Christy liked best.

"That doesn't explain how you knew to call."  Emma tilted her hip just a bit with her arms crossed in front of her and Christy flashed back to images of this woman drawn as a comic.  This was a classic pose for her and Christy almost grinned at the absurdity of knowing that about someone from a comic book.  How could she tell these people that she wasn't from this world, and in the world she came from their lives, their pains and losses, were used as entertainment.  Emma had suffered so much, and to have to tell the blonde proud woman that her pain had been…  Christy just shook her head of these thoughts, completely oblivious to the woman watching her with intense eyes.  She had to answer the question in some way.

Christy sighed heavily.  "I know a lot of things that really aren't public knowledge around here."

"And how did you come across such information?"  Emma's voice got chillier.

The car pulling into the driveway was clearly there to deliver pizza.  Perfect timing.  "I'll go get my purse."  Christy started to turn towards the house.

"Don't bother."  Emma strode over to the van and opened the passenger seat door to reach in and pull out her purse.  "You can't really afford this, can you?"  The tone made it clear that it was an insult, and Christy should be offended, but Emma was going to pay.  Christy just gave Emma a nod and let Emma walk up to the man and deal with the bill.  Emma was rich, so Christy wasn't going to argue about her paying.  She would have had to really get creative with grocery shopping to pay for the number of pizza's they had.

"Here, Let me help."  Jon came out of the house to help carry the six pizza's inside.  He took them all, leaving Emma and Christy to watch the driver pull away.

"Well, I guess it's dinner time."

"I still want an answer."

Christy sighed and turned to face Emma.  "Later."  She knew she was a security risk.  The X-men would move from asking to demanding if she didn't deal with this.  Maybe she could find a gentle way of saying it after dinner.  A way that also left out much of what Christy didn't want people to know about how she got here or what happened to the woman that had been living the life Christy had stolen.

Christy reached out to touch Emma's arm before they got to the front door.  It was distracting to feel the woman was really real, but Christy pushed those stupid thoughts aside and spoke quietly when Emma glanced at her.  "I don't want to talk about this in front of the kids.  There are just things that… "

Emma just nodded as the front door opened again.  Annie took one glance at Christy's hand on Emma's arm and tensed up.  Christy just let go and gritted her teeth.  Great a jealous non-girlfriend on top of everything else.