A/N: Heeelllloooooo! We weren't planning to update for a couple more days but when we read our first reviews we were spurred on the 'deliver the goods' so to speak, ;) So anyway, here's chapter 2. Hope you enjoy! Love, lar-ton & ral-edge.

PS: We'd like to thank, missymaniac and Thesseli for our first reviews! We love you!

"Ohmyohmyohmyhomyohmyohmh god god god smegging bloody hell fire" gabbled the blonde, racing over to the mirror, she let out another loud shriek, clamping her hand over her mouth, "I'm a smegging women" she groaned.

Rimmer, with trembling hands, touched the blonde's face, scarcely able to believe she was him. He slid his hands across her face feeling her smooth, peachy skin, his hands then moved down his...her neck, all the while he was whimpering in his new, soft feather light voice, he jumped slightly as his hands made contact with breasts. He froze wondering what to do. The last time he'd been this close to a pair of breasts he was 4 months old and it was dinner time.

He ran his fingers over them and smiled, "At least a c cup" he said to no one in particular.

His hands reluctantly moved downwards, they wanted to stay clammed to the breasts. Rimmer felt his hands glide over a flat stomach before moving outwards to trace a pair of curvy hips. Rimmer looked down, staring at the tight red dress that looked like he'd been poured into, his eyes met Rachael's, she was trembling, just like Rimmer, and looked incurably uncomfortable. She had a small face, pale hazel coloured eyes, and a small nose and mouth, her blonde, almost mousy coloured hair hung loose round her shoulders.

Rimmer threw his head back and groaned. He'd been ready to choose a new body, on the Alter U game. A tall dark haired Spanish bloke called Antonio, but at the exact moment he'd moved his fingers to make the selection, he sneezed jerking forward and when he opened his eyes, he realised he was shorter, he casually glanced up into the bathroom mirror, looked away, then realised what was wrong.

He was a women.

He groaned, letting her head drop on the mirror. "Smeg." Looking up at his reflection he smiled, at least he wasn't one of the really ugly characters on offer. They're had been a particularly nasty looking character by the name of Brutus, with more tattoos than a centipede has legs.

He stepped back and glanced at Rachael's legs, whistling quietly, he ran a hand up her silky skin and smirked. He could actually have a lot of fun getting to know, Rachael- better.

Yes.

Much better.

Anyone who had seen Lister, well Liam walking down the grey, gloomy corridors of Red Dwarf was a huge, permanent slightly manic grin plastered onto his face, would have thought he was either insanely happy, or on some illegal substance. He couldn't help it, Lister was passing places he'd seen a thousand or more times, yet today they felt new, exciting, everything was just waiting to be explored.

It took Lister nearly 20 minutes to realize he was attracting a lot more female attention then he usually did. Women would stop dead in their tracks and stare at him longingly, they'd sigh as he casual strolled passed, hands in his jeans that cost the earth, they'd bat their eyelashes at him if he caught them staring. In short- he was a sex beast. Lister was just turning a corner, when it was his turn to stop dead in his tracks when he spotted the one person who made him stare, sigh and oddly enough, bat his eyelashes.

Navigation Officer Kristine Kochanski was walking his way.

Lister, ran his hand through his hair for the 100th time that morning and headed strait for Kristine, she was stood with two other female officers who both started giggling and twirling their hair round their fingers when they saw him approaching. As he reached Kristine he stood behind her and whispered in her ear, "Hi."

She jumped half a mile before turning to face with a scowl, "What do think your doing?"

His smile faltered slightly, a little taken aback at this cold reception but pressed on, "I was just wondering if you'd like to accompany me to the Officers lounge tonight? Shall we say 7?"

Kristine's lips pursed in anger and she narrowed her eyes, "What makes you think I'd go anywhere with a pretty boy like you?"

"Errrm, well," Lister stammered, shifting nervously in his new trainers "Why not?" He wanted to run to the nearest wall and bang his head on it, why did his mouth, correction LIAM's mouth, have to open and let those stupid, ignorant, self obsessed words come tumbling out, he was such a smeg head.

Kristine raised a perfectly plucked eyebrow and fixed Lister with a cold, hard stare " Listen matey" she said, jabbing him in the chest with her finger, "I would have thought you'd be QUITE content with the amount of girls flocking round your feet like the poor, love sick fools they are!" she gave a particularly hard jab and her scowl intensified "and you have no right, what-so-ever to presume I would go the officers lounge with you, not now, not ever."

She pushed Lister back with such a force, he was sure he'd have toppled over if the wall hadn't been there, "Now then, Barbie boy, take your fancy jeans and your 'because I'm worth it' haircut away from me, before I have you reported for harassing a superior officer"

"I was only asking you out!" whined Lister pathetically, rubbing his chest where Kris had jabbed him,

"NOW!" she yelled, pointing down the corridor, eyes aflame with fury.

Lister backed away, holding his hands up in surrender, but somehow found him saying, "You know you want it," and winking. At this Kristine's mouth hung open and raised her arm to slap, however Lister seeing this, quickly turned round, cursed himself and swaggered off down the corridor and into the canteen for breakfast.

Rimmer meanwhile was now about to leave his and Lister's room- well he'd said he was but, every time he got to the door he remembered something else he needed to take with him. The fact he was a women didn't exactly help with Rimmer's anxieties. Although strangely enough it wasn't the fact he was stuck in a women's body for 24 hours, but more that he was worried about looking like a hooker.

He stared critically at his scantily clad figure and frowned. The dress was too short, (both at the bottom and the top) it showed way too much flesh and was too tight for words; and the less said about the heels the better. Rimmer groaned, his old clothes were useless now, unless he wanted to turn Rachel into a cross dresser, something which he definitely didn't want to do. There was no avoiding it.

He'd have to go shopping.