Sometimes
By Isabella Summers
Summary: On a courtroom, Alexandra O'Connor thinks...
Couple: Slight BA.
Timeline: On an alternative world where Buffy was never brought back, Angel never had romantic interest for Cordelia and is human. After ATS 2nd season, I'd say. But there will be BA!
Disclaimer: The characters you didn't recognize are mine. The others are Joss Whedon's, whom – I pray – will give us closure.
Sometimes, Alexandra really believed that her husband loved her.
She saw it when he caressed her cheek before leaving for a mission – Alexandra's husband is a PI. Or when she confessed she feared for his life while he was stalking someone and he assured her everything would work up right in the end. She even saw love when she woke up in the morning to see him smiling gently at her. It was a habit of her husband that she loved, the way he woke up before her and watched her sleep.
Alexandra knew everything she was supposed to know about her husband. He had told her every little detail about his true nature when they were on their third date. He had been shocked when she had smiled and told him it was no problem with her. Three years after that date, he had become what he was now and they had gotten married. Alexandra had been so happy back then. And after the marriage they had moved in his hotel.
But there were times when Alexandra arrived at their apartment and found her husband and Spike, their Billy-Idol-wannabe friend, talking. When their conversation was over, her husband was pensive and quiet. She tried very hard to make him talk, but he said she didn't have to worry, because --- eventually --- he would be fine.
Alexandra had tried to ask Faith once about what made her husband to act so weird after Spike's visits, but the beautiful brunette girl had asked her to give her husband time to heal. She had tried to talk with Wesley and Willow and Cordelia, but no one had told her.
The former cheerleader told her it was Angel's past haunting him again. Cordelia warned her to leave it behind, because it had none with her and her husband's lives.
Alexandra did as Cordelia told her: she left it behind, and slowly her husband came back to her when she --- happily and proudly --- announced she was pregnant. It was beautiful, when her husband kneeled in front of her and supported his ear on her still flat belly, trying to listen to their child. And Alexandra was happy again. Her husband was hers again.
It lasted until their child --- a girl --- was born.
It was a shock to everyone when they first saw the girl. She was blonde, little, with huge hazel eyes. Everyone believed Alexandra had cheated on her husband, but he was the first to say she had not. According to what Gwen had told her, her husband had a meeting with their friends and, when they came out of the reunion room, no one accused Alexandra of being a cheater.
Sometimes, Alexandra wondered if she and her husband brought the right baby home. Because their daughter --- Jenna Marie --- was growing to be less and less like her and her husband. And, when she tried to talk with her husband about that, he told her she didn't have to understand, only to love their daughter. And she obeyed him. She loved Jenna the best she could.
Sometimes, Alexandra watched her husband sleeping. It was when he slept that he got more handsome. But, since the first night they slept together, her husband dreamt with someone. Another woman. He smiled at his slumber and called that dreamy woman beloved and cried on his sleep. Then, he bolted up awake, and looked at Alexandra. She hugged him and wiped his tears and they came back to sleep.
Sometimes, Alexandra could see herself reflected on her husband's chocolate eyes. But, when he dreamt with that woman, she saw he wished that she were someone else. But, quickly, this glimmer disappeared and he hugged her. And Alexandra loved her husband so much, that she went back to sleep and made no questions. But he closed his eyes and sighed a name that haunted Alexandra.
Buffy.
Now, Alexandra knew who Buffy was. And how important this Buffy was for her husband. Because, once, there was a the-slayer-and-the-vampire, a Romeo and Juliet love style. And Buffy made her husband lose his soul on a moment of pure happiness, and killed him for the sake of the world. Alexandra knew everything now, because, after five years of marriage, her husband had filed for a divorce and wanted Jenna's custody.
And had Buffy with him.
Sometimes, Alexandra really believed her husband had loved her. But, when she noticed the passionate way her husband looked at that woman that had haunted his dreams all nights of their marriage, she noticed that there had never been a chance for Alexandra to win over her husband's heart.
Sometimes, like now, when she saw her now-former husband smiling and laughing with his fiancé, she wished she had never met Angel.