(10-04-04)
Sorry for not updating for… A month or whatever, since school started… My brain dead condition would be the fault of the school. I'm listening to The Nameless by Slipknot right now and it's making me happy… Shouting. Yay.
I don't feel like responding to reviews right now, sorry, but I'm sure you probably forget what you said and if there was something really important, remind me when you review this chapter. Just because I don't respond doesn't mean I don't like you guys, though, so keep talking to me… I'm sure you don't care, anyway, you just wanna read the crappy story… If this chapter sucks and makes no sense it's because I didn't proof read... Too tired... So, onward...!
CHAPTER EIGHT
Pookie died
"Hey, since we have nothing better to do, and Hiei's loss of consciousness has put a ban on my singing, how about we play a game!" Shadow said cheerfully.
"Games? I love games!" Eclipse replied. "What kind of game?!"
"I spy!" Shadow announced. Eclipse grinned, bouncing up and down as she walked.
"Yay! Can I go first?"
"Okay!"
"I spy something... white!"
"Inuyasha's hair!"
"No!"
"Fluffy's hair!"
"No!"
"Fluffy's clothes!"
"No!"
"Kagome's shirt!"
"No!"
"Hiei's belt!"
"No!"
"That cloud that looks like a gargantuous octopus inhaling a big pink clam!"
"Aw, ya got it!"
"Woohoo! Okay, okay, here we go, I spy something blue!"
"The sky!"
"No!"
"Miroku!"
"No!"
"Miroku's robes!"
"You got it!"
"Woohoo! Okay, then, I spy something... Fluorescent orange!"
"That oversized poisonous snail!"
"Wow! First try!"
"I spy something silver!"
"Youko's hair!"
"No!"
"That cloud!"
"No!"
"Inuyasha's hair!"
"No!"
"That other cloud!"
"No!"
"Youko's hair!"
"You got it!"
"Woohoo! I spy something brown!"
"That tree!"
"No!"
"That demon coming up really fast behind us!"
"Go you!"
"Wait, what?!" Inuyasha said, turning. None other than Koga the wolf demon came tearing up the path behind them, jumped over the entire group, and landed in front of them, turning. They all stopped.
"Koga!" Kagome said, surprised.
"Hello, Kagome," he said, grinning. Inuyasha growled.
"Who's this?" Youko asked. Koga looked at him with interest, walked right past Inuyasha without acknowledging him (which just caused the dog-eared half-breed to snarl with frustration), and walked up to Youko.
"Who're you?" he asked. Youko looked down at him.
"I think I asked first, wolf," he said dryly.
"Well, you got yourself some new companions, mutt face!" Koga said, smirking at Inuyasha.
"Shut up, Koga!"
"Who's this?" Shadow and Eclipse asked in unison, pointing at Koga.
Koga looked at them, looked at Sesshoumaru, looked at their wrists, and then was seriously confused.
"What's this?"
"We are the Doomiful People of the Magical Land of Humpty Dumpty and the Cheese Sandwich!" Shadow said cheerfully. "We come in peace!" She made a peace sign and smiled extremely happy-like. Koga just twitched and slowly turned to look at Inuyasha.
"I didn't invite them," the hanyou said dryly, also sweat dropping but not to the same horrified extent as Koga.
"Who are these people, anyway...?"
"Your worst nightmare!" Eclipse said, pointing and laughing maniacally. Shadow blinked.
"We come bearing gifts of doom, and hellish wraths," she said innocently. Koga stared. "We mean you minimal amounts of harm..."
"The last thing I want to do is hurt you, but it's still on the list," Eclipse laughed maniacally. Youko stared.
"Usually Shadow is the one laughing maniacally..." he said. "But instead she's just calmly threatening you..."
"Threats? These girls aren't even demons!" Koga said, sniffing at them.
"WE ARE SO!" they screeched in unison, jumping on his head. He fell over.
"How can you say we aren't demons? CAN'T YOU TELL BY OUR DOOMIFUL AURAS OF HORRIDLY FRIGHTENING STUFF 'N' JUNK?" Shadow screamed.
"Get off him," Youko said. "We don't even know his name and you're already hitting on him."
"I'M NOT HITTING ON HIM!" Shadow screamed.
"You're straddling him."
Shadow jumped up and was instantly several feet away, hiding behind Sesshoumaru. "STAY AWAY, WOLF!"
"So I assume you know this wolf," Youko said, holding Koga up by his pointy ear.
"Let go of me, fox!"
Youko shrugged and let go. Koga growled.
"You think you're better than me or something? I can tell by that smug look!"
"It's not smug," Youko said tauntingly. "It's just how I am. Superior."
"YOU'RE NOT BETTER THAN ME! You're just like Inuyasha!"
"Yeah right! I'm a demon, not a half-breed with a bad attitude," Youko said, smirking. Inuyasha glared.
"You think you're so great... Stupid fox."
"Stupid wolf."
"I'm not stupid!"
"What diluted individual told you that, Wolf?"
"I'M NOT STUPID!"
"You've mentioned that..."
"Dumb fox! You reek of flowers! How can I even be the slightest bit intimidated by you when you smell like FLOWERS?"
"Because they are doomiful flowers of murderous proportions!" Shadow said cheerfully. Youko and Koga glared.
"SHUTUP, BAKA ONNA!"
Shadow pouted. "Fine then, butt cracks..." She was ignored, as usual, as Youko shot an insult at Koga under his breath and the shouting started all over again. Everybody just stared until eventually the two canines were going at each others throats, and had somehow dragged Inuyasha into it and were currently arguing over... something. It wasn't really very obvious since every other word was either an insult or a swearword.
Hiei, who had passed out from Shadow's incessant singing earlier and had been carelessly draped over the back of the still-nameless black warhorse, lunged at them suddenly and hit all three, and Shadow, too, for good measure, even though she was sitting there innocently making a castle out of a deck of cards she'd found in one of her bottomless pockets...
"Ow!" she whined. "What was that for?"
"I don't know, but you probably needed it. Now who's this?" Hiei asked, brushing off Shadow to talk to Miroku.
"Koga, the wolf demon. He's an ally of sorts, don't worry."
"Ally?! Why would I be an ally to this jerk?" Koga snapped, pulling Inuyasha's ear. Inuyasha growled, but Miroku interrupted.
"Why can't we all get along?"
"Because he's a stupid wolf!" Youko and Inuyasha snapped, while Koga simultaneously called Inuyasha dumb mutt and Youko a stupid canine wannabe.
"CANINE WANNABE?" Youko shouted, a blood vessel popping out on his temple.
"That's what I said."
"What's that supposed to mean, exactly? I look more like a canine than you, stupid elf dog!"
"Elf dog?"
"Yeah, you got the elf ears and everything!"
"You're mentally damaged! Stupid fox. You think you're so great! What've you ever done to get a reputation?!"
"I'M HUNDREDS OF YEARS OLD AND I WAS STEALING EXPENSIVE ARTIFACTS FROM THE MOST GUARDED VAULTS IN MAKAI BEFORE YOU EVEN EXISTED IN THOUGHT!"
Koga stared. "So you're a dirty thief!"
Youko clenched his fists, growling. Hiei stared.
"Y'know, I always thought dogs were social creatures... And cats were the ones that tore out each others throats on occasion..." he muttered.
"ARE YOU COMPARING ME TO A CAT, HIEI? I really hope you aren't because that would be a BIG mistake," Youko said through clenched teeth.
"Why? You're acting like one," Koga said arrogantly.
"OH, THAT'S IT!"
An explosion occurred around Youko and a large, salivating plant erupted out of the ground behind him. Koga finally decided to take the fox seriously.
"OH MY GOD, WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!"
"It's one of the flowers I smell like, Wolf," Youko said, smirking. "And it's hungry..."
"Flowers eat sunlight!"
"Not this one!"
"Youko!!! Don't hurt him!" Kagome said, horrified.
"Why not? He needs it!"
"Uh-oh..." Hiei said, noticing something none of the others had. Shadow was sitting there trembling amidst a scattered mess of cards. Her eyes were welled up with tears. A whimper escaped her throat, quiet at first, then growing excruciatingly loud and high-pitched.
"YOU DESTROYED POOKIE-CHAN'S CARD CASTLE!!!" she screamed, sending flocks of birds fleeing from the trees. An aura exploded around her and a second later, Youko's hungry plant was nothing but ashes.
"YOU KILLED MY PLANT!"
"YOU MADE POOKIE HOMELESS!"
"WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?"
"AT LEAST POOKIE HAD THE CAPACITY TO SPEAK UNDERSTANDABLE JAPANESE! WHAT THE HECK KIND OF USE IS A FLOWER?"
"WHAT THE HELL IS POOKIE?"
"POOKIE! POOKIE THE SMALL BLACK BEETLE DEITY OF DEATH, SUFFERING, PAIN, AND LOVE! YOU'RE TELLING ME YOU DON'T KNOW WHO POOKIE-CHAN IS?!"
After that statement, nobody could speak. They were either several miles away (having either run there or been blown away by Shadow's voice), unconscious (from Shadow's voice), speechless from shock, or temporarily brain dead.
Shadow stood there panting. Sesshoumaru, Koga, Inuyasha, and Youko were worst off, their canine sense of hearing fried for the moment.
"Shadow... That was really... Really... Loud..." Hiei muttered, sitting on the ground a few feet away.
"Pookie-chan's homelessness must be avenged!" she said maniacally.
"Can't you just build him another house?" Miroku suggested. Shadow spun and stared at him with a demonic evil-woman look.
"YOU! HOW DARE YOU THINK OF SOMETHING I DIDN'T?! YOU'LL LIVE TO REGRET IT!"
Miroku twitched. Eclipse was sitting in the background muttering morbid death threats and doing it in a cheerful way.
"You're all going to die... Slow... Painful... Bloody... Messy deaths... by my hand... You destroyed Master Pookie's house... Blood... Will spew... Out your eyes..."
She, however, was ignored. Except for Hiei, who was giving her a calculating look and thinking something along the lines of, "Counseling is in order when we get home... Shadow's counseling. With a baseball bat."
Shadow was still staring down a nervous Miroku, but she suddenly dropped to the ground and started gathering up her cards and quickly and psychotically building her card castle again, muttering.
"Pookie-chan will never forgive me... Must rebuild house..."
"Let's just keep moving," Yusuke suggested. "Wherever we're going, we're not getting there by not getting there."
"No, duh..." Hiei muttered, standing up. "C'mon, guys."
"Say what?!" Youko said loudly. "I can't hear you!"
Hiei sighed. "LET'S GO!" he shouted. Youko twitched.
"I could hear you... I was joking."
"WELL DON'T JOKE, THEN!"
Youko froze and fell over sideways. "Okay... Now I can't hear you."
"Not my problem," Hiei muttered, stomping off down the path.
"VOILA!" Shadow said cheerfully, presenting her 104 card labryinth. "Now where is Master Pookie-chan?" She crawled around on the ground wildly searching for her oh-so-holy-and-worshipped small black beetle diety of death, suffering, pain, and love, completely oblivious that Hiei was half a mile down the path already.
Sesshoumaru sighed. "Shadow... You're retarded."
"You're mean! Where's Pookie?"
"Pookie died."
"OH MY GOD! NOW I HAVE TO FIND HIS BODY AND BUILD A PYRAMID OVER IT TO WORSHIP HIM!"
Sesshoumaru and Youko exchanged glances and picked her up by her ankles. They followed Hiei down the path, Eclipse dragging on the ground behind Sesshoumaru, still plotting the downfall of modern American government... Dunno what she knows about it, but she's plotting its downfall... Evilly...
Koga sighed and trailed after them.
"What's going on here, anyway?" he asked, catching up to Sesshoumaru.
"Please, don't make me be the one to tell you," he sighed. Koga shot a hateful look at Youko, who was dragging Shadow through the dirt by her ankle. He looked around at Miroku (who was leading the black horse), Sango, Yusuke, and Kuwabara, the next closest people, and fell in step with the monk.
"Who're your friends here?" he asked.
Miroku sighed. "It's a really long story..."
"Well I'm not doing anything."
"They're from a far away place, and their only way home has been blocked off with some sort of barrier..." Miroku said. "Since we were the first people they saw, those two girls refused to leave us... And since the group won't break up, they have be with us. We're heading towards their home now, hoping maybe the barrier is down... It was a total accident in the first place."
"Oh... Okay..."
"They saw Sesshoumaru, captured him, and will not let him go. He's been with us for days."
"Stupid girls," Inuyasha muttered, catching up. "Stupid wolf. Stupid horse..."
"HORSIE!" Shadow squealed. She twisted herself around into a pretzel to get herself out of Youko's grip, then rolled across the ground (somehow) to get to the horse. "I officially dub thee Kuronue."
Youko stopped dead, spun on his heel, and stared. "You are NOT naming that horse Kuronue."
"Why not? I think it's a good name," Shadow said.
"Kuronue was not a horse in any sense, he had nothing in common with that horse, and I do not approve of it."
"Who's Kuronue?" Koga asked Miroku. The monk shrugged.
"A friend of his, I assume."
"But... Kuronue is such a cool name..."
"Well I appreciate the thought, but a horse...? You'll have this horse, call it Kuronue, and every time you say anything about the dumb animal I'll have to think about Kuronue!"
"...What's wrong with that?"
"BECAUSE HE WAS MY FRIEND AND HE'S DEAD!" Youko snapped. "Naming a horse after him will not honor his memory!"
"WHY NOT?! It's not an INSULT! Kuronue wouldn't disapprove, would he?"
"Why don't we go ASK him? He's alive in Makai in this period, isn't he?" Kuwabara asked. Youko stared, wide-eyed.
"Are you BRAINDEAD? Wait, sorry, I forgot who I was talking to... Look, Shadow, name the horse Sesshoumaru or something, but not Kuronue."
"... But..."
"I don't want to have a horse named after me either," Sesshoumaru hissed at Youko. The fox shrugged.
"How about if I name him Koi?" Shadow said.
"A koi is a kind of fish..." Yusuke pointed out.
"Yeah, so?"
"And they aren't black, either..."
"Yeah, so?"
"Fine, name it Koi," Youko said. "It's better than Kuronue."
"Yes it is! I wouldn't want to name my horse after anything that's involved with you anyway... Stupid fox's dead crime partner..."
Youko twitched. "Do. Not. Insult. Him."
Next thing Shadow knew, she was dragging through the dirt behind Sesshoumaru, unconscious with various vines holding her limbs to her body. Somehow in the mauling she'd become unchained from Sesshoumaru and he now dragged her carelessly over as many rocks, bumps, branches, and sharp stones as he could.
Koga stared. "...They get along well for being friends, don't they...?"
"Apparently Youko thought very highly of Kuronue," Miroku said, watching Shadow drag through a small stream full of jagged stones.
"Yes, apparently." Koga then went back to Kagome. "Hey, Kagome. How have this mutt and his new friends been treating you?"
And Inuyasha was on him in a second. "Get away from her already! How many times do I have to tell you to leave her alone?"
"Inuyasha! Don't start a fight again!"
"Why NOT? Stupid wolf. Youko'll back me!"
"We don't need that," Kagome said. "Don't start a fight!"
"Youko won't back you, Youko will knock the crap out of Koga for his own reasons," Yusuke said, looking at the fox. "He's pissed."
"About that Krow-nay guy?"
Youko promptly fell on his face, and the next thing Inuyasha knew, a small silvery fox had his teeth dug into his leg.
"YOW!"
"A FOX! IT'S SO CUTE!" Eclipse squealed, back out of her psycho morbid state. She strained against Sesshoumaru, nearly stepped on Shadow, tripped, fell, and pulled Sesshoumaru down on top of them.
"Fox. Fox. Fox. Fox." She inched across the ground towards the snarling silver fox. "Fox. Fox. Cute. Little. Silver. Fox. With. Many. Tails."
As she neared Youko, she reached out and yanked on one of his tails. He let go of Inuyasha and yelped, jumping a few feet away and hopping onto Yusuke's shoulder.
"D'oh!" Yusuke yelped. "Get off me!"
The little silver fox jumped down, gave Inuyasha a smug look, and trotted down the path to catch up with Hiei, who'd walked on ahead, choosing to ignore the petty bickering amongst his companions.
"Stupid fox," Inuyasha was grumbling, looking at his mauled leg. "What'd I do?"
"His name was Kuronue, not Krow-nay," Yusuke said.
"That's all? He must have WORSHIPPED that guy!" Inuyasha said incredulously.
"DON'T MAKE ME COME BACK THERE!" Youko shouted back, once again in his humanoid form.
"NOT LIKE YOU COULD HURT ME IF YOU DID, PANSY!"
Koga looked at Inuyasha, down at his mauled leg, then back up at his face. "You really are stupid, mutt."
"What now, mangy wolf?"
"Didn't he already hurt you?"
"Shut up. That barely tickles."
Koga just snorted.
"Now are you planning on hanging around us all day?" Inuyasha said. "If you are, you'll have to--"
"BE HANDCUFFED!" Shadow exploded cheerfully, snapping a cuff on Koga and Inuyasha.
"What the hell are you doing?" they said in unison.
"Handcuffs are our friends!"
"Take it off!" Inuyasha screeched, straining against the handcuff. Koga snarled at the infernal piece of metal.
"Shadow," Sesshoumaru sighed. Shadow stood there with her hands behind her back, grinning proudly at her handiwork.
"Go you!" Eclipse said cheerfully, giving Shadow a high five. "We've captured another!"
"... Another what?"
"Bishie demon, of course," Shadow said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.
"Bishie demon?"
"Bishounen youkai," Shadow said, straining the words.
"Why haven't you gone after Hiei or Youko, then?" Sango asked. Shadow blinked, then grinned.
"Hiei needs no force! He loves us all!"
Hiei stopped and stared back at them, one eyebrow raised.
"Hiei doesn't feel love," Yusuke said. Then he seemed thoughtful. "Well, maybe except for you..."
Shadow just grinned. "Yes, Hiei loves me so much." She pulled a picture out of her pocket and held it up. "Would he do this if he didn't?"
The picture showed Shadow lying on the ground with swirly eyes and her tongue hanging out. Hiei stood over her with a baseball bat, eyes glowing red.
"... That's love alright," Yusuke said sarcastically.
"I know!" Shadow said cheerfully. She crammed the picture back in her pocket and grinned for another minute before blinking and looking down at Inuyasha and Koga, who were clawing and chewing and yanking on the chain connecting them.
"BEHAVE!" Eclipse and Shadow snapped in unison. With a stupid smile, Shadow then declared stupidly that 'behave' and beehive' sound a lot alike. Everyone sweatdropped.
It was only then that Sesshoumaru realized he was not chained to anybody. He swiftly walked into the forest. A terrorized screech echoed through Japan a second later and Shadow darted in after him, tackled him, and hugged him like she hadn't seen him in eight thousand years.
"WHY WOULD YOU LEAVE ME? DON'T YOU CARE AT ALL?! OH, HOW I MISSED YOU SO!"
Sesshoumaru just lay there, his eye twitching.
"He was barely gone for three seconds," Miroku pointed out. "And I don't think he cares. At all. Ever."
"SHUT UP, INSENSITIVE MONK! HOW DARE YOU SAY MY FLUFFY-SAMA DOESN'T LOVE ME!"
"Please, Shadow, for the love of my sanity, please get off me," Sesshoumaru said patiently.
"But... But... You mean you don't love me?" Shadow said, her eyes welling up with tears.
"No."
"MY FLUFFY-SAMA DOESN'T LOVE ME!!!" Shadow wailed, getting up and dragging Sesshoumaru out of the forest and over to Koga. She threw her arms around the wolf demon's neck and bawled against his chest. He just twitched, not pleased by the interruption to the argument he'd been winning against Inuyasha.
"Get... off... me..." Koga muttered.
"FLUFFY-SAMA HATES ME THOUGH!"
"I DON'T CARE! GET AWAY!"
Shadow stared up at him. "YOU'RE SO MEAN!!!" She spun around and stomped up the path, occasionally shooting hateful glares over her shoulder. At one of these precise moments, she tripped and fell forward, slammed into Hiei, and knocked him over. The rest of the group just stared.
"Baka..." they said in unison.
"Handcuff!" Eclipse said cheerfully, snapping one of Sesshoumaru's back onto her wrist.
Shadow was sitting on top of Hiei, smiling stupidly while Youko stared down at her.
"Let's go," Yusuke said finally, taking charge. "I want to go home. Accidents always happen to me and then Keiko has no idea and... She kills me."
"You look pretty alive to me," Koga said.
"I was being sarcastic... But it isn't far from the truth..."
"I don't want to come with you..." the wolf complained. "What's her name...? Shadow? SHADOW, YOU DUMB FOOL! GET OVER HERE!"
"No! You were mean!" Shadow retorted, still sitting on Hiei. He was lying on the ground drumming his fingers against the dirt and looking thoroughly annoyed.
"You can get off me any time, you know," he said, jabbing Shadow's leg.
"Off? What? Oh! Hey, Hiei! Is this some sort of inconvenience?" she asked.
"Yes," he said. "I want to go home and I can do that if you're SITTING ON ME!!!"
"Oh. Well too bad, you're comfy..."
"Hey fox, help me out," Hiei said. Youko shrugged and picked up Shadow in his arms. She seemed puzzled by the sudden motion, then looked at the fox and shrieked.
"AHHH! IT'S YOUKO KURAMA! KING OF THIEVES AND SLUT OF MAKAI!" She then lunged away and went tearing down the path screaming and didn't come back.
So this is the situation: Shadow just ran away, so she's nowhere to be seen. Youko and Hiei are in the front of the group, a good two or three meters ahead of the rest. Then there's Yusuke and Kuwabara. Sesshoumaru is behind them with Eclipse chained to his right arm. Close behind is Koga and Inuyasha, chained together, with Kagome next to them. Miroku, Sango, and Kirara, with Shippou riding the horse (led by Miroku), bring up the rear.
In this manner, they headed down the forest path towards the magical well... Of course, that's after settling a large argument that broke out because of Shadow's outburst. You didn't miss much. Just a mass interrogation of the fox conducted by a certain curious monk, which somehow led to and ended in a massive fistfight and everyone lying unconscious on the ground. That's all.
Do not correct me on use of honorifics on Pookie's name, Shadow's just stupid and called him Pookie-chan intentionally, even though he's a deity of whatnot and all… At the beginning, I'm aware when they were playing I Spy that somebody said the same thing twice, it was wrong the first time and right the second… It was intentional. And from this point, any Japanese phrases I use are ones I've learned in school (unless otherwise specified), so if you correct me on them, you're retarded and I won't pay attention.