Disclaimer: I don't own them, I didn't create them, and I don't profit from them, but as always I'd love to have coffee with George and Jorja. I'd spring for scones, bagels, and even croissants.
Author's Note: This ficlet was inspired by comments in Sobel's recap of the season opener for CSI over at , mainly the comment about the pictures being good for some interesting talk around the water cooler. And please remember, this is a parody, not a serious piece of fiction, but then is any fiction really serious since it's not true anyway? And while we're at it, writing fanfiction about fictitious characters is really straying from reality altogether, but then again, we love it, and that's why we're here, so enjoy.
Nick quirked an eyebrow at Sara as they made their way back to his Denali. "So are you doing anything after shift?"
She shook her head and looked at him curiously, noting the mischievous glint in his eye. "No. Why? Did you want to do something?"
He waggled his eyebrows at her and held up a sheaf of flyers from various wedding chapels that they'd been handed while investigating the demise of a justice of the peace from an alien themed wedding chapel just off of the Strip. "Well, some of these offer hefty discounts."
She tilted her head slightly and her brow furrowed with interest as she tried to restrain a smirk. "Are you suggesting that we get married?"
A sexy grin began to spread across his face. "Well, it could be fun, and the pictures certainly would cause some interesting talk around the water cooler."
Sara looked him over from head to toe and back again with obvious interest. "You just want to get me into the sack."
He let out a chuckle and lowered his voice to a husky whisper. "Who wouldn't want to, but at least I'd make an honest woman out of you first."
Sara considered his proposition with mathematical precision. She couldn't remember the last time she'd taken a tumble in the sheets, Nick was sexy as hell, Gil Grissom would never wake up and notice her, and Nick was just sexy as hell, and she couldn't remember the last time she'd taken a tumble in the sheets. She looked up at him and raised an eyebrow. "Well, you never know if this double is going to turn into a triple shift, so let's just use our legally allowed fifteen minute break since we're already here and we can consummate things later."
Nick looked at her with a slight bit of confusion. "Was that 'yes' or 'no'? Wait, oh, consummate later." He let out a chuckle. "I get to marry Sara Sidle." He looked as if he was ready to jump her right there.
"Down boy." Sara held up her hand. "Emphasis on later. We're still on the clock." She glanced down at her watch. "We'd better hurry, I think the good reverend said he had a cancellation."
Nick was all grins as he and Sara returned to the Chapel of Intergalactic Love to tie the knot. Fifteen minutes and a kiss that left Sara's head spinning in the outer stratosphere later, they were officially Mr. and Mrs. Nick Stokes.
"We'd like the deluxe photo package." Nick grinned at Sara who was beginning to see him in a whole new light.
"I want extra photos of the kiss." Sara blurted out as she stared at Nick's physique. She always thought he was fit, but after that kiss, with her body crushed up against his, she found her mind clouded with lust and unable to focus on the case they were in the middle of.
When they returned to the lab, they stopped at each bulletin board on the way to the break room and pinned up a photo of the kiss. Coming into the break room, they found Grissom sitting at the table drinking a cup of coffee and working on a New York Times crossword in pen. He glanced up and looked at them quizzically. "How's the case?"
Nick grinned, still a little speechless at the anticipation of getting to consummate with Sara later.
Sara was succinct in her delivery. "Uh, good, we think that we've narrowed down our list of suspects to a justice of the peace, but we may have compromised the case because Nick and I had him marry us about an hour ago."
Grissom snorted coffee out of his nose as he noticed the glint of gold on each of their left hands. His eyes widened as he looked at Sara. "It's too late?" There was a bit of a croak in his voice.
Sara simply raised a single brow at him.
"Of course it is." Grissom groused.
Catherine breezed into the break room, glancing around and noticing something out of the ordinary. She quickly honed in on the rings on Nick and Sara's fingers and the packet of wedding photos in Nick's hand. "Oh, so you went to the Chapel of Intergalactic Love. I would have picked the Elvis Chapel myself."
Grissom looked at her with a pained expression. "Cath?" There was something about his eyes that pleaded with her. "Is it too late for us?"
Catherine rolled her eyes at him. "It's been too late for a long time. I've been sleeping with Warrick for months now, but if it doesn't work out, I'll let you know, uh, but Greg's just ahead of you in line, oh, and so are David and Archie. Sorry."
"Oh." He furrowed his brow as he considered that. "I need to go feed Fluffy, and maybe give Lady Heather a call." He got up and made his way out of the break room leaving his crossword behind with one entry blank.
Catherine glanced down. "Hmm, ten letter word meaning complete." She chuckled and picked up the pen, talking as she filled in the word. "C-o-n-s-u-m-m-a-t-e."
Nick glanced over at Sara with an anxious expression. "Is it later yet?"
She glanced at the clock and shrugged. "What the hell, we've already compromised the case, we might as well have fun before we're put on unpaid suspension."
"Oh, you'll have fun. I've been suspended plenty of times." Catherine reassured her. A sly grin formed on her face. "Besides." She waggled her eyebrows. "Have you ever noticed what a big state Texas is?"
Sara looked at Catherine in confusion. "Huh?"
Nick leaned over and whispered in her ear.
Understanding registered in Sara's mind as a sultry grin spread across her face. She looked at Nick. "I'm driving." The pair of newlyweds dashed out of the lab, leaving a trail of wedding photos in their wake, as they rushed to the closest Denali and sped towards Nick's house.
Upon entering the house, Sara kicked the door closed behind them, picking Nick up and flinging him over her shoulder; all that extra working out while she was channeling her energy into something more positive than drinking had finally paid off.
After finding the door to his bedroom after the third try, the first being the bathroom and the second an office, she dropped him on the bed and quickly climbed on top of him, letting out a whimper as he pulled her close and kissed her. The kiss, again, sent her to the outer stratosphere.
With Sara's head spinning, Nick took control and propelled them towards euphoric bliss, after disposing of several key articles of clothing. Later, as they lay tangled in the sheets on the floor at the foot of his bed, Sara managed to finally speak again. "It's no wonder you play baseball so well."
Nick chuckled and trailed his fingers down her back. "So are you up for a little more batting practice?"
The End