Part Two
Explode
Ease your trouble
We'll pay them double
Not to look at you for a while
And you can rely on
What you get high on
And you last just as long as it serves you
Explode or implode
Explode or implode
We will take care of it
Yes, we will carry you
'Cause you're deserted
What's good, you hurt it
And kills you it keeps you alive
So give it up
In a world of puppets
It's a shame what they do to us all
Can we do anything for you now?
Jack O'Neill sat at the table in the base's commissary pushing uneaten carrots around his plate with his fork his mood clear to all who thought about approaching to offer company. Company that was normally provided by a certain, to go unnamed, archaeologist. Teal'c solemnly took the seat across from his commanding officer and friend a worried look on his face, or at least the best worried look that the Jaffa could show.
"I do not believe that you should behave as you are doing O'Neill. The carrots on your serving dish appear to be cold, perhaps you should return to the serving hatch for more." Jack looked up at his friend for a few moments before glancing down at his plate to inspect the carrots.
"Yeah, they look it." Teal'c frowned at his friend and opened his mouth to replace his words with more suitable ones only to be silenced by a look from the colonel. "I get your point Teal'c, it's just," Jack hesitated running a hand through his almost totally grey hair. "It's hard to believe that we never, before now, I mean you'd think it would be obvious wouldn't you?" Teal'c raised an eyebrow.
"Perhaps, though if the Tok'ra are correct that Daniel Jackson has been invaded by some thing then we would not have known, before." Jack looked at the larger man both eyebrows raised.
"Oh yeah, everything's that simple, the answers always under our noses. Like the Ashen thing, it was there but we didn't think to look until you and Danny found those papers. I even sent myself a goddamned note. It would all be so easy IF the Tok'ra were ALWAYS right, but what if they aren't? What if Danny's been keeping it a secret for God only knows how long and has just gotten that good at it that we never realized? What if that IS the truth, what then T?" The strain showed in Jack's voice as well as anger, which was also carried in his gaze as he locked eyes with Teal'c's slamming a fist onto the table, "We going to keep him locked away up stairs, to be forgotten, or are we going to let Simmions and his crones drag him off to some secret project, or the third, most likely option, are the Tok'ra going to take him off to God knows were and get information that would help them AND us from him in less than nice ways and not tell us any of it? What if they know something we don't? After all they always have some hidden agenda or other that we never know about until it's too late. They are always keeping things from us, what if they've known all along? Well Teal'c you going to see this the same way as I am or are you going to take their side on this?" Teal'c remained seated his bearing purposely stiff and unaffected while his eyes shone with anger and distaste directed towards his friend.
"O'Neill I do not believe you have been in control of your feelings or actions for some time. I agree with you on your views about the Tok'ra, as you ARE well aware. I also share your feelings on the matter that is presently on many of our minds, that of the revelation given to us by Daniel Jackson, a man whom we have treated as a trusted friend and college for many years, which may be due to alien incursions, or be as simple a fact as the truth, finally revealed to us due to resent events." Teal'c's tone carried a message to Jack as well as his words did, with a resigned sigh Jack lent back in his chair and rested his head on his hands.
"Sorry, it's just, the general's ordered me to begin questioning the 'prisoner', I hate him for lying but God, I trusted him more than anyone else, even you sometimes. He knows things about me that very few others do, because I thought he WAS who we thought he was. If the Tok'ra are wrong, if this isn't anything to do with anything from off-world, if it's true, I don't know what I'm going to do." Teal'c nodded in understanding before standing.
"Perhaps I should accompany you O'Neill." Jack gave Teal'c the best smile he had to offer and stood accepting the offer wholeheartedly.
Jack nodded to the airmen on guard outside of the cell standing to one side as they unlocked the outer door before stepping into the dimly lit room. As the door closed behind him and Teal'c, Jack allowed time for his eyes to adjust to the light before turning his attention to the man laid out on the cell's bottom bunk. Blue eyes were fixed on the bottom of the upper bunk. Jack pulled himself up to his full height not allowing himself to see the man as anything other than a prisoner, anything but his most trusted friend. Jack stood searching for the right thing to say only to be given an invitation by the prisoner.
"Ask anything, whatever you want to know, but mind I don't know everything and there are things I can't tell you." Daniel's voice was soft across the distance but it was still loud enough for them to here. Teal'c straightened raising an eyebrow and glancing at Jack, telling him that it was time to start, and to forget the personal feelings he had towards the other man.
"Fine I can understand that. First off what's your real name, it saves the effort." Blue eyes turned towards him for a few moments before returning to their original position.
"My FIRST real name is Alastair, my second you know, they are my names." Daniel's voice was blank, controlled. Jack raised his chin, jaw tightening.
"Okay, secondly where were you born?" This question gained him a second glance, and a vaguely humoured smile that surprised him.
"In Ireland, a small village in the west, by the side of a hill, well by the side of Nephin Beg near the Oweniny River." Jack blinked startled by the answer, he knew of the area, he had been expecting the name of a place he had never heard of. Swiftly composing himself he moved on to another question.
"Know of the area, how old were you when your parents died, your real parents?" A few moments of silence passed before an answer came.
"Nine when my mother died, twelve when my father did." Jack raised an eyebrow.
"How did they die?" The more personal the questions the better.
"They were killed, by raiders." The answer was bland telling of nothing more than the basic facts. The basic facts shocked both Jack and Teal'c as was shown by the look exchanged by them.
"Do you, or did you have any siblings?" Blue eyes looked at him for a long moment as though asking him were he was going.
"Four sisters and a brother, one of my sisters died with our mother, another and my brother died with my father, they were the eldest." The answer surprised Jack and made him wonder what, if the story was true, life had been like for the young boy.
"What did your parents do?"
"My father was a blacksmith, my mother a healer." Jack raised an eyebrow at Teal'c deciding that the other man might have some questions. Teal'c nodded an acceptance and turned his attention to the 'prisoner'.
"What were the name's of your parents?" Blue eyes shifted once more, this time towards Teal'c rather than Jack.
"Jason and Ilsbeth and before you ask my elder brother's name was Liam, his twin was Hazel, they were sixteen years older than me, then there was Cera, my elder sister by eleven years, then Jessica, four years older and my younger sister Mary, by four years." The ages and names were reeled off swiftly not one catching in Daniel's throat. Teal'c and Jack looked at each other eyebrows raised, it wasn't fair when the game was know. It was time to change the way they were running. They looked at each other trying to think of some questions to ask, it was hard to think of any, if it wasn't an alien entity then they didn't have all that many questions that they wanted to ask. After all experience from one of the Tauri wouldn't help in the on going battle that they and their allies were fighting, out there. Teal'c's frown lifted slightly telling Jack that he had a question. Nodding for him to continue Jack turned his attention back to their prisoner.
"Before the mission to Abydos had you ever previously used the StarGate?" Jack nodded, it was a good question.
"No, that was the first time." Jack's eyebrows raised a little further.
"Where you on Earth when the people of Egypt rebelled against the Goa'uld?" There was a pregnant pause during which Jack shifted uncomfortably becoming annoyed with the basic answers that didn't help beyond answering the question.
"Yes." Great now it was turning into a yes, no, question and answer session, not a good sign. Giving Teal'c a quiet look that told him that they were going to leave it there for the time being until they had some helpful questions to ask. Teal'c nodded and walked over to the door knocking on it to tell the guards that they were ready to leave. Jack unable to stop himself stepped up to the bars giving the man laid on the bunk his best cold glare.
"We'll be back to finish this." The words held more than just that one simple message but they gained no reaction from the man they had been directed at. Jack turned on his heel and stalked from the room his demeanour showing his annoyance and distaste. How could he never have seen it before?
Sam Carter knocked lightly on Jack's office door before walking in. Her blue eyes took in the other two members of her team as she slid into her usual seat in front of her CO's desk. It had been a long day for her, talking to her father about what the possible causes for what Daniel had said could be, avoiding the idea that it could be the truth, not some alien influenced thing, and then helping Janet go over all of Daniel's tests results, all of which had shown no difference at anytime other than the times they knew the causes of it, like when they had returned from the land of the light, with the touched virus. Or when Daniel had been suffering from sarcophagus withdrawal. It was frustrating because she didn't even want to begin thinking about it being real, that it had always been there, and she had a feeling that the other two were feeling the same way. Daniel had always seemed to be, well Daniel Jackson, a good, supportive, kind, gentle young archaeologist, never anything else. It was hard to even think that he could have been 'possessed' for a lack of a better word, for some time and they hadn't noticed, surely they should have noticed it?
Shaking her head to get rid of the thoughts that were presently running though her head she looked from one to the other hoping they had gotten something worth while from their questioning session.
"Sir?" Her voice was soft and worn, telling them, as well as her paler than normal complexion did, that she had had a long reward less day. Jack looked at her for a long time before answering.
"No better than you got I'll guess, couldn't really think of much to ask to be honest. Your dad's taking a shot tomorrow isn't he?" Sam nodded sadly meeting her friend's eyes.
"Yeah, but it's not looking good is it?" Her voice displayed the feelings felt by all of them, hopelessness and betrayal mixed with anger and lethargy.
"Indeed it is not." Teal'c rumbled blandly, his eyes fixed upon one of the photos on the colonel's desk, a snap of SG-1, Janet Fraiser and her adopted daughter Cassandra that had been taken at one of the colonel's barbecue's a year before. They were all smiling, due to a joke that general Hammond had told them as he prepared to take the picture, they were close enough together that they were all touching shoulders with at least one of the others, a sign of their closeness. It was hard to think that it had never occurred to them, any of them, that a year on they might be facing something like this, something that was so close to destroying their belief in an important part of their group.
"I believe you should get some rest Major Carter." Teal'c gave her a concerned look as he spoke waiting for any argument from the young woman. Instead she nodded stifling a yawn with her hand as she stood and headed towards the door. Stopping just before she left she turned back to face Jack,
"We didn't see it either sir, whatever it is you can't have been expected to notice. You can't always see things as soon as it's there." With that she turned and headed off towards her quarters to get some rest. Or at least as much rest as she could get.
Daniel Jackson rubbed his left arm wincing as his hand pressed too hard on the bandaged area were the shark thing had bitten him, which had been hampering his arm movement since the day it had been put on. He then carefully ran tentative fingers over his bandaged right side checking for any blood spots, knowing that if there were any he would have to be taken to the infirmary sooner or later to have them changed. Which wasn't a very nice thought, it was bad enough to know that at least four people were watching him from time to time through that damned security camera. He badly needed to relive himself but was still unwilling to allow them the fun of his embarrassment. The SGC security personal where well known for their habits of telling everyone about peoples bad habits or embracing moments. He didn't feel like having any more talk about him wandering the grape vine.
The questioning session had been awful, he had wanted to answer them with longer, better answers, but he knew that it wasn't the best thing to do, he was willing, but there were things you should only tell a person if you're sure that they won't use it against you, something he wasn't so sure about with them anymore, not that he blamed them for what they had done after he had told them. It was only fair after he had been lying to them for a long long time. Which he regretted and probably would for however long he lived. The sound of the door opening to once more admit visitors he pulled himself up right to face the on coming question and answer session.
Jacob Carter, Anise/Freya, Teal'c, Sam and Jack entered the room every one of them looking grim and uncaring. Not a good sign, though the questions would no doubt be very interesting to attempt to answer. Especially if they were questions he couldn't answer, about non-earth matters, very few pieces of USEFUL information came to mind for the answer to that kind of question. Before the Stargate program he hadn't ever really been anywhere off world that often. Once or twice, but he couldn't remember much about those few times, and it hadn't been using the Stargate system, he had only heard stories about such things until he had met Catherine Langford six years before. And then there was the problem that there were questions he could know the answer, but wouldn't be able to answer due to his own promises and in order to protect them, not that they would probably take that as an answer.
It was hard not to look at them, not to beg them for forgiveness, for them to forget that he had said anything, to say that he had been lying, but he didn't want to, he wanted them to know the truth, no matter what their reaction to it was. They should have known from the beginning. They SHOULD have known. How could he have let it get so far?
Jacob Carter stepped forward having been named chief interrogator for this round of questioning. He knew as well as anyone what this was doing to the group that had once been SG-1. The likely hood that one of their number, their 'conscience' as O'Neill had once called the 'young' archaeologist could be someone they didn't truly know, that they had never known him that it had all been an act. A play to gain their trust and everything they knew. That he could be a traitor.
"Forgive me if I don't waste time on niceties but there are some matters that need to be cleared up. Matters which are causing some unrest in this base." None of them saw the self-damnation that crossed Daniel's face as he starred blankly at the top bunk. It was bad enough knowing it without being told that, without any of the pleasantries, everyone's shocked and applauded by you, it sounded like the kind of thing your parents would say when they found out you had stolen something. And Daniel hadn't stolen anything or at least as far as he knew he hadn't stolen anything. But then they didn't know that did they? Maybe they thought he was some guy who had STOLEN Daniel Jackson's identity or something. Which he hadn't, even the thought of something so cruel made him feel sick, mentally.
"We have some questions to ask, all of which we expect to be answered. Do you understand that?" Daniel desperately wanted to get up walk over to the bars stare Jacob straight in the eyes and say, 'I understand, but I CAN'T possibly answer ALL of your questions if I don't know the answers to them. Why can't you all believe me when I say I am who I am, not some spy sent to watch you and ruin everything. For one thing I haven't done a very good job have I? If that's what I am, I mean I've helped a hell of a lot more than I've hindered', but instead he stayed where he was by pure will alone and answered as politely as he could.
"I understand." Short and simple. Nothing more, nothing less.
Jacob nodded and took a deep breath deciding on a question with which he could start.
"Why Lie?" The simplest question that would no doubt have the most complicated answer.
"Why? Because I doubt very much you would have believed me if I had told the truth, plus there's the fact there'd be people who would want to run tests on me, and then there's the fact that if anyone of the people on Earth could want to kill me. Not an option that anyone would enjoy." Daniel winced mentally at the blandness of his own voice. He so wanted to tell them everything, but that would no doubt take six years either that or they wouldn't believe him. Like they didn't believe that he was telling the truth.
Jacob raised an eyebrow glancing at the others before moving onto the next question on his mental list.
"Were you aware of the existence of the Goa'uld prior to joining the StarGate project?"
"Yes, I was." Yeah, unfortunately, I met some of them. Jack clenched his fists angry that he hadn't said before. That his friend had known before he had. That his friend hadn't warned them. "But they weren't called the Goa'uld then, at least not here, the people of Egypt thought them to be gods, so did a lot of other people at the time, those who didn't called them 'Kel'tar'." The addition to the answer startled them all, having expected nothing more than a short answer.
"Where were you at the time of the rebellion?" Daniel couldn't help it he had to look at Jacob to know what he looked like, to see if he cared. To see if any of them cared anymore. The answer was yes, but they were trying to hide it from him.
"I was in the, I was in Egypt." He had almost used the old name for Egypt, the dynastic realm. Jacob looked startled by his answer, which didn't surprise him, after all he hadn't known that the StarGate had been real. But he had been there. He could remember the faces of the rebellions leaders as though it had only been yesterday. "I wasn't in Giza though." Jacob raised an eyebrow unimpressed by the other man's answer.
"Then where were you?" The question had to be asked, because, after all this time the answer would tell them if he were a coward or not, if he followed the Goa'uld or not.
"In Abydos." Another simple answer without extras. But it told Jacob and Anise enough for them to know that he didn't follow the Goa'uld, perhaps. Anise frowned looking to Jacob for permission to ask a few of her own questions.
"How have you been able to live for so long?" The question surprised Daniel, and he stiffened unconsciously, gaze returning to the floor. He knew that that was one question he couldn't answer, not that he didn't know the answer, he just couldn't answer it. Not without putting them in danger. He shook his head in a negative movement and signed heavily.
"I can't tell you." He didn't need to look up to know what Jack's reaction would be, he knew already, and hated himself all the more for it. It wasn't fair as it was that Sam, Jack, Teal'c, Janet and the general hadn't known from the beginning, god, not even Catherine knew.
This week was just getting worse and worse by the minute.
"Well that got us a long way!" The anger in jack's voice startled the others as they watched him pace the briefing room running a hand through his hair as though it would make a difference to something. They all felt the same. After spending an hour questioning the prisoner the man they had known as Daniel Jackson they had gained little other than very short very uninformative answers beyond those gained in the first few minutes. It had all gone down hill form the moment Jacob had asked if 'Daniel' could tell them how he had lived so long, if he indeed had.
"Look Jack this isn't going to make any difference to what's happening." Jacob's voice was soft, controlled despite his own feeling of the pointlessness of the answers they had gained in past few days, if it had even been that long. It seemed like an eternity had pasted since Daniel Jackson had admitted that he wasn't who they thought they were, kind of. It was the kind of bit that was bothering Jacob. He had seen the photos of the young Doctor Jackson in the file that he had been presented with the night of the revelation. It didn't seem possible that he could be as old as he said he was and BE Daniel Jackson, not with having pictures of him as a child. It just wasn't possible.
Suddenly he smiled, why hadn't he seen it before. It was so clear it had been placed on the table in front of him yet he hadn't even thought that it could be evidence in the Tok'ra's view. That Doctor Jackson had been possessed. It was the only answer.
"I've just thought of something," The words caught Jack's attention instantly his eyes meeting Jacob's searching for proof that he hadn't been seeing a lie for six years. "There are photos of Daniel as a child." That one simple question brought a smile to the faces of the members of the SGC in the room as they were finally given a last straw of hope. Hope that it would all just get back to normal once they had helped their friend though what ever was wrong with him. That Daniel Jackson hadn't been lying to them for years, hadn't been betraying their trust.
Daniel sighed heavily staring at the bars that kept him in the small cell. The same cell in which Sam had been held in when Jolinar had possessed her. The same cell in which she had very nearly died.
The thought of how he had felt at that moment, and in so many similar ones during the past six years echoing in his mind. How could he have kept the lie alive for so long. With a groan he pushed himself upright. How long could he put up with lying in the same Goddamn place, thinking in the same Goddamn circle, not being able to do a Goddamn thing about it, before he would snap. Or maybe that was the whole point. Daniel blinked frowning at his own thoughts. Of course that was the point. Shaking his head he idly regarded the tray that had brought in half an hour before deciding that he wasn't quiet that hungry. His eyes drifted in the direction of the bucket and he winced feeling sick at the thought of relieving himself in front of the SF's that were no doubt watching. But there was another option. Smiling to himself, knowing that the action would give him just about enough time to relive himself without being watched or walking in on Daniel picked the blanket up off the bed and placed it over the camera's lens before swiftly moving to the bucket.
"I'm sorry sir but the tests have come up clear." Like they had done the last time Janet's voice was resigned as she admitted that no more evidence had been found to back up the Tok'ra's theory that Daniel had been possessed. Janet doubted that running the same tests for a third time would make any difference. It was frustrating to think there was nothing she could find that could possibly explain the young man's behaviour. His admission.
Yeah, that was exactly what it had been, an admission that he had lied to him. It had been Daniel talking to them not some weird entity, not a ghost inhabiting their friend's body, they just didn't want to admit it. Didn't want to have to face it, didn't want to hear the truth. Even if in truth it was all they had wanted to know for the past six years, the truth. The only thing they had never thought of was what it would cost them to know more about their mysterious young friend who was always doing something that they wouldn't have expected him to be capable of. The truth behind the man. The price was starting to seem too high. The answer to a simple question wasn't worth it. Wasn't worth the broken trust, the broken friendship and the hatred and denial. But it was out now, and none of them had anyway to change that, no matter how hard they might wish for one.
Janet shook her head as she took in the faces of the remaining free member of SG-1, seeing the wariness and need for it to all have been some stupid joke, that their friend hadn't betrayed them. Signs of just how deep the pain went, in all of them, not just in Jack O'Neill.
Daniel held his hands in the air as the guards entered the main area of the cell moving to remove the cause of their visit from the camera. It had been close but he'd managed it, just about. Which was a good thing, as he doubted he would be allowed to do the same thing again. Silently he pushed the sheet through the bars and backed away to sit back down on the bunk. He watched as they slowly moved forwards and picked up the sheet their nervousness apparent. Something he wouldn't have expected to see on the faces of the people within the SGC ever. If anything it just made him doubt his decision, after taking it as far as he had why tell them? Why ruin what had taken years to build up? Because it was the right thing to do, that was why he had done it, he hated lies and all the things that accompanied them. The truth was hard enough as it was without that.
Colonel Frank Simmons looked up as a sergeant entered his office carrying a port folio.
"Can I help you Sergeant?" The NID agents voice was cold as he spoke to the man, expecting an answer. The young man held the folio out to his senior officer ignoring the glare he was being entreated with.
"I was told you bring you this, it's the latest report from Cheyenne mountain." A vague smile graced Simmons's features as he took the folder waving the airman out and opening the file.
After reading the first few lines he smiled knowing just what he could do to help the SGC out with their latest problem. Get rid of it.
Jack O'Neill paced the floor of his office once again becoming bored with the pattern that was beginning to develop. The whole QA followed by the pacing up and down of office floors and guesses on how such and such was or wasn't possible and so on in never ending circles. Why couldn't this damn thing be over and done with all ready? Because nothing is ever that simple. Between them none of them, not the other members of the SGC, not the Tok'ra, could think of anything which would explain any of it, or any thing at all besides pictures, which could in this day and age so easily be faked, to back up the Tok'ra theory. A theory that, despite what it would mean, he would prefer to the idea that this was just some home truth, something that had been waiting for the right time to air. He wasn't willing to believe that. And somehow he doubted the other two members of SG-1 were either.
Simmons moved through the SGC knowing that the guards wouldn't be expecting him, as far as the SGC knew he didn't know about this latest adventure. But of course he was about to prove them wrong. The colonel smiled as he glanced down at the unconscious airman at his feet and pulled his gun out of it's holster before calmly unlocking the door to the cell. It was time to end the only real hindrance in the civilian quarter of the SGC. For good.
Teal'c stood in front of the window over looking the StarGate alone, having been unable to reach his normal state of Kel'noreem. Which hadn't surprised him. For the past few days he had had far too many thought and doubts drifting around his head to be able to do anything much but focus on acting normal, though he had no doubt that his friends had noticed that he wasn't ok with it all. Normally in this sort of situation it would have been Daniel Jackson himself who would have helped Teal'c deal with what was happening, something that still surprised the ex-first prime, after the hand he had had in his friend's wife's fate. It had always seemed odd that the man hadn't gone against him, hated him for it all. Teal'c sighed shaking his head before turning and heading back to his quarters, he needed at least some rest, even if it didn't turn out to be much. Tomorrow would be another day as the Tauri saying went.
Daniel looked up as his latest visitor entered, surprised to find himself faced with not a member of the Tok'ra or the SGC, but with the unfriendly face of Colonel Simmons. Shifting his weight he sat up frowning at the NID agent, knowing only too well that the man's arrival was so not a good thing.
Simmons smiled coldly as he walked up to the bars his gun held openly in his hand. A clear sign of the reason he had come. "Well, well, what do we have here? I know, a traitor. I'm soo sorry about this Doctor Jackson but our relationship is, it seems, at an end."
Daniel stood, hands clenching into fists at his side, defiantly meeting Simmons' gaze. "This is not over Colonel, you will not get away with this, or anything else, I shall see to that." He kept his voice soft, and the meaning of his words purposely clear. It wasn't going to be that easy, one shot would not end it all. The other man laughed shaking his head mockingly and taking aim.
"I doubt you'll be able to live up to that Doctor." The gun's report echoed in the small space of the cell room, and Daniel crumpled bonelessly to the floor. Dead.