Chaoter 3 - A Check-up on Cortex
Meanwhile, on the distant island of Chunga Wunga, Doctor Neo Cortex was enjoying every second of his holiday. He had already been to the local spa, where a Tibetan body mask, sensual massage oils and scantily clad women waited for him, now he was soaking up the rays on the beach, drinking coconut milk and reading Evil Scientist Weekly. "Now this is what I call heaven," he said blissfully, "no more hassle from that annoying bandicoot, no more annoyances and definitely no more interruptions." Just that moment, the peaceful silence was broken with the sound of Cortex's mobile blurting out the familiar beats of the Village People. "Oh, who can that be," Cortex groaned, "can't they see I'm trying to relax here! Hello?"
"Hello boss, it's me, N.Trance."
"What do you want you egg-shaped twit, I specifically said to only call me if it was something important!" He was extremely pissed off with someone spoiling his tan time.
"This IS important boss, I've finished the plans for your latest weapon."
"Excellent news N.Trance, may I ask what it is called?"
"The Crashinator, it is the ultimate in fighting robots, capable of demolishing an entire skyscraper in a matter of seconds, and it can also make a wicked chip butty." Cortex was now very excited on the prospect of being rid of that bandicoot once and for all, plus, he could have chip butty's whenever he liked, which was an added bonus.
"So, have you begun the process of building it?"
"Ummm, not quite, you see, the others are too lazy to get off their arses and do anything, I am the only one doing ANY work around here, it's rather bothersome."
"Well, why don't you do something about it? put those brainwashing contraptions to good use for once." N.Trance didn't know why he hadn't thought of it before, he could simply brainwash the lot of them and get them to do the work for him, while he spent the rest of the week with his feet up.
"A superb idea, I'm glad I have you as my boss."
"Naturally," Cortex gloated, "aren't I just the smartest, wittiest, most handsome guy you've ever met?"
"I wouldn't take it that far boss, all I said was it was a great idea."
"Oh, well, ok, just don't call me again unless it is very urgent. I have to go now, my slave, I mean, helper has arrived to rub me down, bye for now." Cortex quickly ends the conversation and turns off the phone. "everything will be ok, just don't worry about anything," Cortex thought to himself as his feet were being rubbed with oil.
"After I am finished rubbing you down, I shall escort you to your personal hot tub, I hope this is to your satisfaction?" The helper questioned.
"Oh yes, that is absolutely perfect," Cortex groaned, "oh, and while your at it, carry my cases to my hotel room for me would you?" The helper gazed miserably at the 12 suitcases full to the brim with gadgets, gizmos and objects that Cortex took along for his pleasure. "yes sir, as you wish," he said with the grimmest face you would ever lay eyes on.